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Thread: classes for men, ladies this can benefit both of you

  1. #1
    God/dess greenidlady1's Avatar
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    Default classes for men, ladies this can benefit both of you

    Classes for Men


    @ the
    ADULT LEARNING CENTER

    REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED




    by Monday, September 1st 2008

    NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
    OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM


    Class 1
    How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
    Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.



    Class 2
    The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
    Round Table Discussion.

    Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.



    Class 3
    Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
    Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.



    Class 4
    Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Basket and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
    Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.



    Class 5
    Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
    Examples on Video.

    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
    at 7:00 PM



    Class 6
    Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
    Help Line Support and Support Groups.
    Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM



    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum

    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.



    Class 8
    Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
    Graphics and Audio Tapes.

    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.



    Class 9
    Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined



    Class 10
    Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
    Driving Simulations.

    4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.



    Class 11
    Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
    Online Classes and role-playing

    Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined



    Class 12
    How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
    Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.

    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.



    Class 13
    How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
    Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.



    Class 14
    The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
    Live Demonstration.

    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.



    Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: classes for men, ladies this can benefit both of you

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 1
    How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
    Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
    Go to appliance store and buy fidge with automatic ice maker. Less than 2 hours.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 2
    The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
    Round Table Discussion.

    Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
    No, it doesn't change itself, but but it goes on going out from the top, not bottom.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 3
    Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
    Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Not possible.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 4
    Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Basket and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
    Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
    A set aside area on the floor will qualify as a 'basket'.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 5
    Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
    Examples on Video.

    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
    at 7:00 PM
    If you give them a toss, they can.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 6
    Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
    Help Line Support and Support Groups.
    Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM
    More reason to make sure you train her correctly.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum

    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
    I thought you were to go in a room and glance around, if it's not seen, it's not there.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 8
    Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
    Graphics and Audio Tapes.

    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Mnay street vendors sell them, so you don't even have to step out of the car.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 9
    Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined
    Real men get a GPS system.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 10
    Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
    Driving Simulations.

    4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.
    No, it's not genetically impossible, but it is in our genes to be afraid of women drivers. And also to want to get to our destination in one piece.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 11
    Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
    Online Classes and role-playing

    Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined
    Aren't they both supposed to breast feed you, tell you you've been naughty, and spank you?

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 12
    How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
    Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.

    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
    NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 13
    How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
    Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Like you even remember Steak and BJ Day.

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Class 14
    The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
    Live Demonstration.

    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
    So I finally get to see what women are supposed to be doing all day.

  3. #3
    Member Is.a.bella's Avatar
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    Default Re: classes for men, ladies this can benefit both of you

    Quote Originally Posted by glambman View Post
    Quote: Originally Posted by greenidlady1
    Class 3Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

    Not possible.
    I don't think he's lying, I mean even when they have all the insentive in the world to get it all in the hole they still miss it, completely... or do they...

  4. #4
    Banned gingerlee's Avatar
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    Default Re: classes for men, ladies this can benefit both of you

    ^^Ahahahahaha.

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