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Thread: Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

  1. #1
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    Default Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

    Nursery Rhymes we
    Didn't Have as Kids......

    Mary had a little pig,
    She kept it fat and plastered;
    And when the price of pork went up,
    She shot the little bastard.

    ********************

    MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB
    Her father shot it dead.
    Now it goes to school with her,
    Between two hunks of bread.
    ********************

    JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
    To have a little fun.
    Stupid Jill forgot the pill
    And now they have a son.
    ********************

    SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
    Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
    "What have you got there?"
    Said the Pie man unto Simon,
    "Pies, you Dumb Ass"
    ********************

    HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
    All the kings' horses,
    And all the kings' men.
    Had scrambled eggs,
    For breakfast again.
    ********************

    HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
    All over the bedside clock.
    The little dog laughed to see such fun.
    Then died of electric shock.
    ********************

    GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
    Kissed the girls and made them cry.
    And when the boys came out to play,
    He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
    ********************

    There was a little girl who had a little curl
    Right in the middle of her forehead.
    When she was good, she was very, very good.
    But when she was bad........
    She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.

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    Default Re: Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

    OKay, I was feeling a bit down today, and these stupid rhymes made me laugh, and I thought I would share.

    Anyone want to add to it?

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    Senior Member Dixie_Vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

    Hahaha I LOVE the last one!

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    Default Re: Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

    I love me some perverted or weird funny. Thanks for sharing.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  5. #5
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Nursery Rhymes we didn't have as Kids!

    I love those!

    I have one...

    Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub
    were networking while they were swimmin'.
    Their wives they'd exclude,
    which of course was quite rude,
    so all their wives left 'em for women.

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