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Thread: How many FRIENDS do you have?

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    Veteran Member sexyjasmine's Avatar
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    Default How many FRIENDS do you have?

    How many FRIENDS do you honestly believe you have?

    Do you know in your heart that if you need them come to your rescue that they would come?


    Before you get in a situation where you have to put your theory to the test you should see who is really your friend, and this is a great test:

    call up one of your "friends" tell them the most horrific story you can think of and then ask for something simple like can you give me $100 now or can you come get me right now? Then I want you to see who gets in their car, goes online to look for plane tickets or whatever or who is ready and willing to send you the money. Results are very fucking shocking


    I got into a car accident last weekend. I had to spend a lot of money to get it fixed, But I have a big check coming in the mail this Friday so I could pay the person back by then. Before yesterday I thought I had 10 friends but 5 of those people I've done many things for and never asked for shit...when i asked to borrow $200 they didn't have it?

    when you have a real friend not having it isnt an excuse! A friend will never hear a problem and say "I don't have it". A real friend will GET IT! I don't mean tell you oh ill have it in two days or well see, I mean get it that day!


    So I said all this to say there is nothing wrong with testing a friend to see how strong your bond really is. It's fucked up to get into an actual situation and then see who is really your friend.

    Have you ever been in this kind of situation where you needed a friend and they was not there for you?

    its so funny how besides my other 5 true friends when a stranger asked me what was going on and I told her she was ready and willing to give it to me. deep shit

    So remember:Never use the word friend lightly
    before you point the finger make sure your hands are clean

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

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    Actually I don't know. I have people who say they love me, but I would never "test" them. I believe in being independent. If they would help me great, but I don't depend on it or dwell on if they would. I assume they are capable of changing their mind in a moment and watching me sink if it was in their best interest.

    There are many people I would help in time of need, but I don't expect it to be returned. If the did, I would be appreciative. If not, such is humans. Every man for himself applies.

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    Veteran Member Luxurious1's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    I have zero friends when it comes down to that. I do it for other people but they cant do anything for me. If my cats count then 4 friends.
    Originally Posted by ViolaStrings
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    What if they really don't have it. If a friend asked me for 10 grand i HONESTLY don't have it. Does that mean I'm not their real friend? I don't think so....unless all your friends have to be really rich. I could give suggestions, but I honestly wouldn't fly out for someone lose my job just to help someone out. That's what family is for, I think. And it's have to be like death or sexual assault or something REALLY extreme.

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    God/dess ahmeerah's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    In my current city. 2. And my sister. All my life I've always had TWO friends. It's funny how it's always worked out that way.

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    Veteran Member sexyjasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by xdamage View Post
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    Actually I don't know. I have people who say they love me, but I would never "test" them. I believe in being independent. If they would help me great, but I don't depend on it or dwell on if they would. I assume they are capable of changing their mind in a moment and watching me sink if it was in their best interest.

    There are many people I would help in time of need, but I don't expect it to be returned. If the did, I would be appreciative. If not, such is humans. Every man for himself applies.
    I believe in being independent as well but I also believe in "shit happens". You never ever know when you will NEED someone. and if you think that they would watch you sink if it was in their best interest then y would u believe they love you? love is a very deep word as well.

    I help people I don't expect things in return I never let ppl borrow I always give. But I do expect that if I EVER NEED my FRIENDS that they would be there! If not I wouldn't call them my friend.
    before you point the finger make sure your hands are clean

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    Veteran Member sexyjasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by Joplin View Post
    What if they really don't have it. If a friend asked me for 10 grand i HONESTLY don't have it. Does that mean I'm not their real friend? I don't think so....unless all your friends have to be really rich. I could give suggestions, but I honestly wouldn't fly out for someone lose my job just to help someone out. That's what family is for, I think. And it's have to be like death or sexual assault or something REALLY extreme.

    Ok lets be serious for a moment. If they don't have it then obviously it doesn't apply to them in certain situations. but now lets say if your friend asked you for 10cent and you didnt have it...you would try to get it?

    Sweetheart I'm only talking about extreme situations not omg im feeling so sad today for no reason please fly out here and be with me. I mean im in the damn hospital dieing and i'd like to see you one last time! Thats what I mean
    before you point the finger make sure your hands are clean

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    You didn't say you were seriously injured....most of your post was talking about money. I think it's rude to rely on a friend for money/loans, and I addressed how I felt and life or death situation in my previous post....

    Also if someone asked me for 10cents I didn't have I'd tell them to look in the couch or just ask someone on the street. Why should i go out of my way for them if they can do it themselves?

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    Featured Member Jeska's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    in my current town, like 2.. and they're both guys. I'm picky though, and I don't want friends just because I'm lonely. I'd prefer if they had the same interests and values as me.

    In my previous town around 8, people I'm still close to.


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    Featured Member keira0304's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    if you don't include money in the picture, I have one. Emotional support is what I gauge friendship on more than money.
    "Life and death, energy and peace. If I stop today it was still worth it. Even the terrible mistakes that I made and would have unmade if I could. The pains that have burned me and scarred my soul, it was worth it, for having been allowed to walk where I've walked, which was to hell on earth, heaven on earth, back again, into, under, far in between, through it, in it, and above."

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by keira0304 View Post
    if you don't include money in the picture, I have one. Emotional support is what I gauge friendship on more than money.
    That's what I'm trying to get at. I'd be there for emotional support but not financial....thats not what friends are for. That's why I'm confused about the op....

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by sexyjasmine View Post
    I believe in being independent as well but I also believe in "shit happens". You never ever know when you will NEED someone. and if you think that they would watch you sink if it was in their best interest then y would u believe they love you? love is a very deep word as well.

    I help people I don't expect things in return I never let ppl borrow I always give. But I do expect that if I EVER NEED my FRIENDS that they would be there! If not I wouldn't call them my friend.
    For me the reality is I really don't have friends. I have a few people I love. I would do a lot for them, even if it is was not reciprocated, because I love them, I would do that because it is for me.

    But I really have no friends as such that I feel I could depend on. The reality is many people would step up to help me if I needed it. I know it without any doubts, but also it is not something I expect of them and I would do everything in my power to try and solve my problem without help.

    Me, I'd rather be alone and carry my burden then have help. Could be that is pathological even, but I learned to be independent growing up from a young age. I see depending on others as a kind of self selected slavery. I'd rather be independent and free of other's will. It doesn't work for everyone, but it is what works for me.

    p.s. I'm the type who if I get sick, the last thing I want is visitors. Just let me get better so I can get back to being independent.

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    Veteran Member sexyjasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by Joplin View Post
    You didn't say you were seriously injured....most of your post was talking about money. I think it's rude to rely on a friend for money/loans, and I addressed how I felt and life or death situation in my previous post....
    I wasn't seriously injured I didn't need anyone to come to my house. But I spent all of my money repairing my car and towing and all of that. and I litterally needed 200 for an EMERGENCY. I never ask anyone for anything so for me to ask they knew it had to be big and when I let everyone know what for they understood. I'm not gonna say it here that's not needed. Just know it was an emergency and I needed 200.

    You never answered my question in the first place so hopefully you will get to that soon. I'm not saying money is the key you did hear me say for them to come to you are we counting gas to get to you as money? lol If someone cant be there for you that doesn't mean they are not your friend.

    I'll give you another example lets say one of your friends are on their was to a party and you just found out your mother died...would they say I call you back or stay on the phone? and lets not be extreme again and say its their birthday lol

    the whole reason of this was to say how many friends do you think you have?

    how many of those friends would be there for you when you need them? wether it be financially, emotionally, whatever.

    I was giving an example on my recent issue and venting thats all. But I would like for people to respond to my question and thanks to the ones that have already
    before you point the finger make sure your hands are clean

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Well I can't answer it because under your guide lines I'M not anyones friend, there fore I'd have to assume it's impossible for anyone to be my friend if it's defined in the way you define it. I'd never need a person besides a SD to help me like that or my family...I would never ask my "friends" for cash.

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by TheSexKitten View Post
    i have about 4 "would help you bury a body"-type friends.
    I hope you never need their services

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by Joplin View Post
    Well I can't answer it because under your guide lines I'M not anyones friend, there fore I'd have to assume it's impossible for anyone to be my friend if it's defined in the way you define it. I'd never need a person besides a SD to help me like that or my family...I would never ask my "friends" for cash.
    Depends on the friendship. I generally don't like to deal with money with friends either but if you did them a great favour when they were in need, would you not expect the same back when your time came?

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Hmm. 1, maybe 2 friends I could count on no matter what.

    In the past, I've found that having tons of fun hanging out with someone does not equal them wanting to be there for me when I really need it - or me wanting to be there for them, for that matter. Real friendship requires a lot of time and built up trust. Unless there is that foundation, I get wary when someone wants something out of the ordinary from me. I have to know their character pretty well not to fear that they are trying to take advantage of me, especially if it comes to money. Maybe you felt that the foundation of the friendship was strong enough that they should trust you to repay the $200, but they didn't feel that way themselves for whatever reason.

    Also, some people just are more generous than others. Some will help people they barely know, and others could be your best friend for years but leave when you really need them. It helps to look at what someone values in other people before you make them your "true" friend. I am wary of people who value "fun" and "well-connected" above "kind" and "reliable." As for testing them, though, that could get kinda messy.

    Anyway, glad that you are ok after the car accident. And at least now you know that there are 5 people in your life who DO trust you and care for you enough to lend you $200!

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Quote Originally Posted by NewMoon View Post
    Depends on the friendship. I generally don't like to deal with money with friends either but if you did them a great favour when they were in need, would you not expect the same back when your time came?
    Yha I would expect that, but I would never do someone a huge favor. I guess I'm just a shitty person, ahah

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Zero I know no one here .

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    I would probably say I have maybe two true friends. But, I would never gauge a friendship on their willingness to help me out in a financial bind because I really don't think that it's a friend's responsibility to help me out financially. I know my friends don't really have money, if I needed a place to stay, would they let me stay w/ them for free, yeah, but if I needed 200 dollars, would they lend it to me? Maybe, but I wouldn't not call them my friend if they didn't.

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    I think if you "expect" favors from friends, or feel the need to test them, you need to reevaluate yourself, and the way you view friendship.

    I would NEVER, ever, ask a friend for money. It wouldn't matter if I was starving or needed surgery, I just wouldn't do it. There's no way it could end well

    Option 1: They tell me they don't have the $$$. They might honestly be telling the truth. But now I feel bad because they won't help me, they feel uncomfortable for not being able to help, etc.

    Option 2: They give me the money, I can't pay them back right away, they resent me.

    I don't know. I think it's awful to "test" your friendships. That's a great way to piss off friends and alienate the few good ones you have.

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    I'd say I have about 8 or so people that I could count on to be there for me in my darkest times or in major emergencies. I only closely maintain a few, but the other ones are well established enough and long-lasting enough that we still care deeply for one another.

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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Well, I have a friend who is a chronic mooch, and never pays people back. She's great except for that, and we've been friends for so long I just ignore that part of her. If she asked me for $200 to fix her car I'd say no. I still think I'm a good friend.

    I have never been in the situation (and I'd go to my family first anyways), but I think at least 3 people would lend me almost any amount in a heartbeat. Not going to test it though.

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    Veteran Member sexyjasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Well I guess that's the moral of the story then

    Everyone has their own definition of what a friend is and what they should and should't do.

    There is nothing wrong with how some of you feel about friends and there is nothing wrong with the way I feel.

    I once again just asked a simple question. I didnt ask people to judge me for how I feel a friend should be. I just asked people to tell me how many friends they feel they have, and has a friend ever not been there for them when they needed them.

    is a friend someone who can read a thread and answer the question at hand? if so a lot of u r not friends! lol j/p
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    Default Re: How many FRIENDS do you have?

    Well... one of the girls I'd consider a true friend HAS loaned me ~$200 to get a boot off my car once, so she's a friend by my standards as well as the OP's. She's also just a great girl in general, so even if the whole oh-shit-what's-this-contraption-doing-on-my-tire-can-you-help-me-plz thing hadn't happened, she'd be my friend anyway by all considerations.

    The other super friend I have would give me any amount of money if she had it, but she's nursing a zillion dollars in student loans, and I'm not, so I'd never ask.

    Both girls would help me bury a body, give me a bed to sleep in, or exact revenge on an evil ex, no questions asked. And shit, they keep my secrets. That's serious friendship to me.
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