I had a great time on Fri night, totally on fire, knowing just what to say to customers and making great money.
Then for some reason on Saturday I was cripplingly shy. I just couldnt face talking to anyone and just wanted to hide in a corner. I almost went home but one guy came up to me and laid on the charm then asked me for a dance so I did it thinking I just needed to warm up and get into the swing of things.
After that I was a little better so got chatting to a woman who had been eyeing me up all night. She ended up buying a string of dances but I still made shitty money because I could not face talking to any of the groups of guys that came in.
At the end of the night I had been sitting by myself for an hour when my manager asked me if I was ok and I just burst into tears!!! It just seems to be 1 thing after the other in my private life at the moment and it was all weighing on me in the club.
I have never been happy with my body and weight but i can acknowledge there are a few girls in the club who are bigger than me who do just find and are super confident. However I think a major factor was the comparisons I do between me and the other girls all night long, and how the customers don't think twice about commenting on us like cattle e.g "I don't know you have really small tits, hers are better,but you have a bigger arse than her".
My manager was lovely and talked to me for the rest of the shift, his solution is to get a whole new dancer persona so when I come into the club I can turn into a different person without the same worries that I have.
Even at drama classes I could never act super confident, so I don't want to try and act like the other girls. I was thinking of going for the girl next door nurturing type, maybe say I was a student nurse.
But I don't know if guys will prefer some sort of all out sexy vixen who works as a domme on the side!!
Can you please tell me your work persona (if you have one) and the jobs/background/hobbies that go with it to make the whole package?
Also has anyone else had a night like this where everything just came crashing down, and successfully managed to go back? My next shift is on Friday and I am really nervous.It doesn't help that a custie was murdered right outside the club just before my shift finished :S
xx
Wow that was a long winded post before a point was made!!



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