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Thread: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

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    Member Deini's Avatar
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    Default Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Hi girls.

    I had an offer that's hard to refuse. So i really need some sound advice.

    Met this guy, older and attractive. I fancy him as it is. But on the date my first question was if his married. He straight out said so that he was. No really wanting to loose a good day out i vestured around central London with him. As expected he's a gentleman all the times he's not on his phone. which by all means Is pretty fine with me. Through this i met two of his work colleagues-and what i got from it wasn't much to be concerned about (nothing i never herd before)- they are very ruthless business men, and own a handful of Buildings (or something like it) all around central London.

    Point is-all in all. He's a cool guy, whose eager to make his money. When i mentioned i want to move-up on the stripping wold, and start a sort of business. He jumped to the chance. He seemed serious, and at times he could not stop talking about it. I told him i already had someone else in mind whom i trusted. He suggested we all meet and discus it. Hence he's not bullshitting-which i asked several times.

    Things is. In a general i like him. He showed me a really good time ( mean met my every beck and call- a made a dancer's night-she was good) and this is a offer that's hard to refuse. But then i don't really want to relly on a man for this- then he makes it 'clear' that this is a partnership. Given things are hard as it is when you want to start something on your own, and you have no idea how or have the money-this sounds apealing. But, I know i need to stablish trust and what not. He seems willing to under-go the tests for that.

    Then. The catch is-He is interested in me romantically-given he lives london for the most part of his life. (it seems)-this means I'm the other woman. But i told him this is not something i do-ever. But it has never been something i was always completely against. in the past I simply decided against it cause often there is kids involved, and in that sense I don't want little ones to get hurt. His kids, however, are older than me.

    I got a level head on me. I know for a fact i know how to use my sexuality to my benefit, and i don't see any reason why not in this situation. I know not to sleep with him on the get-go. Made sure of that, and I told him that if i do agree to this-he's going to have to try like all the others guys do. Don't mean i say 'yes' and thats me on his bed.

    I said i'll give him an answer today. Regarding the seeing where we go sort of thing. Although-the business side of it seems like it's going to go on ahead anyways-i'll have to see with him today. Either way, am i in over my head? or is this a chance i should take? So, if anything, i don't regret it. But then i know in the end-possibly i might even regret going for it.

    Help. Advice as soon as possible.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    deleted
    Last edited by Brendita; 10-12-2008 at 02:54 AM.

  3. #3
    AudreyLeigh
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    You didnt mention what the business part was? My first thought is hes going to say hell help with whatever business this is and string you along to get in your pants. Then again, Im cynical like that.

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    Veteran Member Ina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    He's married............. end of story.
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Okay, yes, he's married, and that probably should be the end of it, but I want you all to remember something - in Europe, having a mistress is really not the same big deal it is over here, culturally. It's pretty common practice in some areas. The social stigma is not the same. From what I understand, for some ppl it's kind of a stature thing.

    I'm not saying it's right; it just is more of a cultural norm. So the OP might be seeing this in a slightly different light than we are.
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Um... last I checked Europe wasn't like the romance novels.


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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Ok, one of my old friends was in a similar situation and the married guy gave her a 40k or so business credit card to open up a shoe store. She spent a lot of it on inventory and living expenses. The wife caught him, and filed for divorce and he sued my friend for the money back. He had been supporting her for awhile and bought her a car, he tried to get all that back too but didn't. But on the whole business side, she had to pay all the money back.

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    Member Deini's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    On the business side of things, and I've asked-that it has nothing to do with our current situation, and also mentioned I want to bring someone else I trust in (given i was already thinking about it all, and this other person was already the first in mind). He was more than pleased with that, if not impressed that I had to make sure he was not bullshitting so he can charm the pants out of me.

    As for the choice of getting romantically involved. I know all I want is a good time at the moment, and believe or not- Having a lover here, specially for men like him is almost normal. He has been brutally honest me so far, and fromt eh get-go... that is just how i want him to be. I'm a pretty laid back girl, and not interested in falling in love with anyone. All i want right now is to make a name for myself, and be with someone who can show me a good time. Besides, if he's attached, he won't be sniffing my ass all the bloody time. I want as much space as him right now.

    He seemed really open about almost everything. Although we kept the whole other family completely out of it. Met two of his friends, and both knew that it was a 'date'- they hardly battered a lash, and even hatched a plan for a very special occasion for us. Nonetheless, as much as I'm 'tempted' i asked him 'why' he wanted 'this' last Friday and asked him to think about it. I knew he was going home, so now i know he'd be with his wife or something. So maybe he'll realise that he doesn't want to go there, or that he really does. Either way he's sure of what he's doing.

    Also we agreed that the bis side of things and romance will be completely separate, and he told me to draw-up a bis plan, and then he'd look into it given he simply is interested on funding and wants to leave the rest for me-cause to be honest he wants to benefit from this-(shows he's not playing about.) we also agreed that we are not to jump into anything like a bed, just see if it does develop into it-as for now we just enjoy each other's company, but I'm not an idiot at some given time it'll get there.

    Right now. I'm going to talk to the third party. (my trusted friend) and see if this will actually go someplace. As for him. He is at home for the weekend. So...it's possible the 'romance' might not even go ahead. Although he sounded very 'smitten' before he left.

    Still. Whatever happens. I have nothing to loose. Besides-if we go ahead, after reading the above about what happened to this other girl. I intend to make sure this 'happens' professionally, and i get a good chunk of the bis percentage-all put down on paper. Also that he's not going to be getting into any trouble with the wife due to it.

    I find it hard to trust people in this sense-so I'm gonna make sure i at least don't dig my own grave. As for the 'romance' I'll see how that develops, if at all.

    thanks girsl for the reply.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    It sounds like you're already conflicted. Do you think your confliction will end once you establish a relationship with him?

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Quote Originally Posted by lildreamer316 View Post
    Okay, yes, he's married, and that probably should be the end of it, but I want you all to remember something - in Europe, having a mistress is really not the same big deal it is over here, culturally. It's pretty common practice in some areas. The social stigma is not the same. From what I understand, for some ppl it's kind of a stature thing.

    I'm not saying it's right; it just is more of a cultural norm. So the OP might be seeing this in a slightly different light than we are.
    You cannot be serious. Europe is part of the same world that we all live in
    Women over there still expect monogamy from their husbands.

    Seriously stay the fuck away from this man, dont be that bitch.

    Seriously he isn't going to take you serious as a business partner coz he met you as a stripper.

    I think as soon as this man sleeps with u he will have got all that he wanted out the situation.
    Last edited by jaizaine; 09-21-2008 at 07:29 AM.
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Talk to a lawyer. If he's so serious about this he will sign a contract for whatever you two can agree on.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    have fun with him if you want.

    don't go into business with him. people like this are not worth going into business with. they are out to maximize their profit while you do the work. i know people like this. i have friends like this. they aren't bad people. they're usually rather nice and fun. i'd just never tie myself to them in any sort of business or contractual agreement of any kind.

    if you're cool fucking him in exchange for money and presents and anything else he won't be able to take back from you (or anything you're cool using for now, like a car in his name or something), go for it. have your fun. but just fun.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Bad idea. Bad, bad idea.

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    Veteran Member angelicat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Bad idea. If he is capable of lying to his wife (which he clearly is doing...) then he's perfectly capable of lying to you, too. You already know you shouldn't be doing it- if not you wouldn't have questioned it. Listen to your gut, not the idea of what 'could' happen.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Quote Originally Posted by lildreamer316 View Post
    Okay, yes, he's married, and that probably should be the end of it, but I want you all to remember something - in Europe, having a mistress is really not the same big deal it is over here, culturally. It's pretty common practice in some areas. The social stigma is not the same. From what I understand, for some ppl it's kind of a stature thing.

    I'm not saying it's right; it just is more of a cultural norm. So the OP might be seeing this in a slightly different light than we are.
    Uhm, this is BS.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    My general motto is "If he can lie to his wife, he can lie to you." Watch out, babe.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    if it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

    And .... of course, the lying, I agree with anyone who pointed out that if he's capable of lying to his wife, he's quite capable of lying to you as well.






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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Quote Originally Posted by UltraViolet View Post
    BS Lildreamer. I have lived in Europe and you are wrong. Europe isn't some other planet that has different basic morals
    Exactly. Europe is just the same as America, with all the same rules of morallity, I don't care what you've read in romance novels, it's all bullshit.

    As for th OP. If you like this guy and want to have a fling with him that's your decision, it's not the decision that I would make but hey, it's your life. As far as going into business with him goes I would say no way. This has massive potential to get messy and if you're really serious about going into business then you don't want to do it with someone you hardly know. You have no idea whether this guy is trustworthy or not. The fact that he's romantically interestred in you makes things even more complicated. Say you guys hook up, start a business and then you decide to dump him, or he dumps you, that could be your business down the drain. If you have someone else that you know and trust interested in your business idea I would go with them. Starting your own business is hard, hard work, you want to make things a s easy and uncomplicated as possible.



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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Live by the sword, die by the sword.
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Maybe lildreamer got it confused with Asia. Specifically Japan, I think. I remember seeing a "wired for sex" show on it once.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    The guy sounds like a con. Older guy, ruthless businessman equals look out pretty young girl.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Men like this just don't part with their money because of the goodness of their heart. This man has a plan for you, and it's not good.

    What will end up happening is you're going to end up being an underpaid prostitute. This guy wants sex and romance outside of his marriage, but he doesn't want to feel so "pathetic" as to go to a real hooker, because if he just happens to be fucking you and giving you money, it's no big deal. You're not a hooker and he's not a john. He also doesn't want to leave his wife or have her leave him, because he'll lose a shit ton of money. This is the most important thing to him - not you or his wife - the center of his universe is self-love and his money.

    When his wife finds out, your life will be made a living hell and you'll stop getting money from the guy. She might even leave him, and you'll be sued and have to give the money back. He's not going to give it to you all at once. He's going to make you EARN it, and you'll practically have to beg for it because he's playing you in that you have to act like you would still be doing it even if there was no money involved. There's no pressure on him, because he's the least interested party. His money will be his power over you.

    Just work more shifts at work and manage your money well. It's pretty simple.

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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    ^ Wow, I couldn't have said that all better myself. This is exactly what's going on. Men like this use money as a leverage. He sounds clueless to begin with, no offense. Most businessmen on the make aren't trying to forge business alliances with strippers. Not that strippers aren't worth business alliances, but he has other intentions. And those intentions are squarely focused on the thrill he will get from manipulating you and probably, the use of your vagina.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    And don't think that just because his children are grown up it's going to hurt them less. Also, imagine what you are going to do to the self-worth of his wife if she finds out. You would be in part responsible for destroying the self esteem of another human being, and destroying the relationship she has with her life partner. Do this guy a favor and tell him to grow a pair and either leave her or be faithful.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Business offer thats hard to refuse.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rosary View Post
    ^ Wow, I couldn't have said that all better myself. This is exactly what's going on. Men like this use money as a leverage. He sounds clueless to begin with, no offense. Most businessmen on the make aren't trying to forge business alliances with strippers. Not that strippers aren't worth business alliances, but he has other intentions. And those intentions are squarely focused on the thrill he will get from manipulating you and probably, the use of your vagina.
    No one would know about this situation better than me. For serious.

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