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Thread: I Officially Hate Tunics

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Thumbs down I Officially Hate Tunics

    Consider me fed up. I went into the store today to shop around for something new & saucy. Alas, the only thing on the racks was...

    Tunics. Shirts and dresses. Slouchy, sloppy, drapey, floppy, glorified maternity garb!

    Fuck! Don't women want to show off their waists anymore? I mean, if was cool for a hot minute... I wore my share of tunics for the past... oh, I dunno... 2 years! But now I'm over it.

    Where can I buy shirts, dresses, and skirts that accentuate the waist rather than obscure in a mess of wrinkly fabric???

    I'm tired of looking messy. I'm tired of wearing leggings. I'm tired of looking like a hobo.

    I want to look like a girl.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    deleted.
    Last edited by Brendita; 10-12-2008 at 03:24 AM.

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    Veteran Member MissAlethea's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    This is a blog entry I posted a while ago (yes, I know myspace, etc...)

    "Alright, snooty fashion designers of the world- I give up. You win. I'm sort of impressed, really... I mean, it must have taken a lot of careful use of select verbiage like "retro" and "edgy" to create mass trends out of what, in a more perfect world, would be called the "Your Mama Dresses You Funny" school of fashion.
    I've recently decided that it might be nice to get myself some new clothes, maybe move away from the "jeans and a t-shirt" aesthetic. I have been looking for weeks to find something, anything, for summer.
    There is nothing out there that isn't the standard fare for those of us 5'0" and under (which is flowers-on-the-ass-and-glitter from the Jrs' section, and scary mini-republican tweed sets from the petite section), or the hideous monstrosities that have now taken over.
    Let me tell you fashion industry: There are those of us out there who actually have attractive figures, and we want to show them off. Now, you might be saying to yourself "But, you're not waif thin!" You are correct, fashion industry. I eat 2,500 calories a day, not a month. However, the waif thin look? Not. Actually. Attractive. I know it "showcases the clothing" better. But! It's fucking *clothing*. It's supposed to ornament the person wearing it. If you want to do something that allows you freedom from the need to respect your medium, take up performance art. I hear you can starve dogs.
    That being said, I want something that is not:

    a)in hideous colors best relegated to couches in the basement

    b)in hideous prints that are best relegated to the incinerator

    c)empire waisted- not all of us look good in them. They make me look flat chested and fat. I am a 34D and have a 25 inch waist. Fail.

    d)fucking flowy. Again, I have an attractive figure, and would like to show it off. I do not want to look like a fucking Greek oracle or Hungarian peasant. My bathrobe has more shape than most of this shit.

    e)faux "ethnic" i.e. lots of ugly beads. I'm Irish. I cannot get away with this, nor do I have any desire to try.

    f) orange or yellow. I know *maybe* two people who look okay in these colors, and even then, it's not so great.

    g) trying to convey a "lifestyle". I don't live in the Hamptons, SoCal, St. Barth's, Rodeo Drive, Aspen, Manhattan or a commune in the wilderness. The lifestyle I'm trying to emulate in my clothing is "Hey, I'm not naked!" And really, if people want to live any of these ways, clothes should really be last on your list. You should try for the yacht/surfboard/yacht again/small yappy dog and coke habit/ski villa/Upper West Side apartment (good luck on that one)/six foot bong first. Save the uniform for last.

    In closing, the 70's are dead. Thankfully, we still make fun of dudes showing off 4 buttons' worth of chest toupee and big gold medallions. I mean, we tried this with the 80's a little while back, didn't we? Did we not learn our lesson? If you must go back in time and rob your forebearers' graves, can you at least go for eras that we don't still make fun of? Or, oooo, oooo, I know! *Come up with something original.* I suggest something that doesn't look like complete and utter ass on the average person. Seriously. Thank you, that is all."


    On the plus side, it looks like some of the more classic lines are coming back, so that's nice. Now if only we could kill vanity sizing, too...
    Haikus are easy,
    But sometimes they don't make sense:
    Refrigerator.


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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by Brendita View Post
    Well if you tell me what you are looking for, I might be able to make you something.
    Awww I appreciate the offer. I just wish there was more variety at my local mall. Maybe on the runways... I dunno who decide that this should be the era of the tunic?

    Why can't I find a store... even an online store that adheres to clean lines, good tailoring, and to an ultra-feminine aesthetic?

    The closest thing I can conjure up on the interwebz is Nicole Millers stuff... but I can't be paying hundreds of dollars for every single item!

    A pretty outfit shouldn't HAVE to be custom made.

    The fashion situation here is abysmal. Why am I the freak in the boutique when all I want.... is to look neat and lady-like and well put together???
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Miss Alethea..... I completely agree.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Not fucking cute..... Okay?



    .......SRSLY!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    I'm going to be the nay sayer here, I love empire waisted stuff, tunics ETC.

    Reason: I have a body like Betty Boop, for reals. I would rather look five pounds heavier and NOT call attention to my figure. Seriously, if I wear a form fitting tee shirt and jeans, I look slutty without trying. Don't get me wrong, that's all swell and stuff when I'm going out or whatever, and it looks nice in a swimsuit....but just for bumming around the mall...Neh.

    I want to loose ten , twelve pounds which should squash me back into a size one and loose some in the boobies/ass...but seriously...y'all...It's a very uncommon body type and I like to cover up, lest I look like Jessica Rabbit. It's just so weird, I sometimes feel like a freak. I'm STOKED that all this stuff is in style right now!
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    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by VegasPrincess View Post
    I'm going to be the nay sayer here, I love empire waisted stuff, tunics ETC.
    But dude.... shouldn't there be variety? Can't we have the option of tunics and fitted, tailored clothing too?

    I've smiled and bought up tunics for the last... as long as I can remember... maybe 2+ years! I feel fucking frumpy and I am PISSED that the shelves are full-o-tunics.

    Tunics in the morning, tunics in the evening, tunics at supper time. Tunics for a wedding, tunics when you're swimming.... FUCKING TUNICS ALLTHETIME!

    I literally couldn't find a single nice, form fitting (doesn't mean slutty), feminine dress when I popped over to the Forever 21 at Union Sq. Just these Jersey Knit garbage bags... prolly designed by the blind... and sewn by the armless.

    It's a ruched rectangle. A stretchy potato sack. Am I supposed to love it like the fashion version of the messiah?

    Look... I'm all for a variety of silhouettes. Tunics are great for: wearing over a bathing suit, not drawing attention to big tits or a 3-month kocked up pregger belly, skinny 6-foot-tall bitches that look good in everything anyway, and for the purposes you mentioned.

    I don't care. Where are the OTHER kinds of clothing? Where is my freedom of choice? Thats what I need to know.

    I'm not gonna run up and snatch away your tunics. Even if I did, you can stitch some elastic on a bath towel and get the same effect! Take that, GreatGlam!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    ?? i love most of the stuff i've seen on greatglam's site... and most of it is rather form-fitting.

    throw a punch @ eileen fisher or something.

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    Veteran Member winterrose's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    But dude.... shouldn't there be variety? Can't we have the option of tunics and fitted, tailored clothing too?

    I've smiled and bought up tunics for the last... as long as I can remember... maybe 2+ years! I feel fucking frumpy and I am PISSED that the shelves are full-o-tunics.

    Tunics in the morning, tunics in the evening, tunics at supper time. Tunics for a wedding, tunics when you're swimming.... FUCKING TUNICS ALLTHETIME!

    I literally couldn't find a single nice, form fitting (doesn't mean slutty), feminine dress when I popped over to the Forever 21 at Union Sq. Just these Jersey Knit garbage bags... prolly designed by the blind... and sewn by the armless.

    It's a ruched rectangle. A stretchy potato sack. Am I supposed to love it like the fashion version of the messiah?

    Look... I'm all for a variety of silhouettes. Tunics are great for: wearing over a bathing suit, not drawing attention to big tits or a 3-month kocked up pregger belly, skinny 6-foot-tall bitches that look good in everything anyway, and for the purposes you mentioned.

    I don't care. Where are the OTHER kinds of clothing? Where is my freedom of choice? Thats what I need to know.

    I'm not gonna run up and snatch away your tunics. Even if I did, you can stitch some elastic on a bath towel and get the same effect! Take that, GreatGlam!

    oh stop please, my sides hurt from laughing. sewn by the blind....my poor keyboard has milk on it now.

    elastic on a bath towel...my mother in law did that to a lot of her towels and added velcro to keep from having to do the tuck in thing after bathing.
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    God/dess kitana's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    I agree. I think tunics make everyone look frumpy and knocked the fuck up! They are disgusting, and gross and should be banned. Like flock of seagulls hairstyle banned, to return nevermore!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Feel like a damn salt lick at the goats petting zoo!
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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by kitana View Post
    Like flock of seagulls hairstyle banned, to return nevermore!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by ColetteCalahan View Post
    ?? i love most of the stuff i've seen on greatglam's site... and most of it is rather form-fitting.

    throw a punch @ eileen fisher or something.
    Hahahahah! Omg... the Eileen fisher site is hilarious.

    I checked the greatglam site. You are correct. It is more form fitting than I remember. I must have confused it with AMI
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    ^^ You totally summed(in this thread) up why I end crying after i go to the mall. The tops totally make me look pregnant when i have nice curves and a flat stomach. I also don't get why every single freaking store has the EXACT SAME clothes, how do they make any money?

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by MeanGirl View Post
    ^^ You totally summed(in this thread) up why I end crying after i go to the mall. The tops totally make me look pregnant when i have nice curves and a flat stomach. I also don't get why every single freaking store has the EXACT SAME clothes, how do they make any money?

    That's my major gripe..... How many incarnations of the same shapeless deflated hot-air balloon can I purchase before I go insane?

    It's like I'm faced with option A: Wear nothing but tunics.
    Or option B: pay 10-100X more for a different kind of outfit made by some fancy schmancy designer.

    There is no variety. It's those nasty-ratty-ass tunics or poverty.

    If I go broke... I'll be homeless... and end up wearing a potato sack... fuck! It all comes back to the tunic!!!!!!!!

    It's not fair I tells ya!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    screw the mall. I always find something great at Ross or TJMax! and I like spending way less!
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    Veteran Member MonicaF's Avatar
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    Smiley Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    well, call me a cheap miami hoochie, but online I like:




    I just moved out to Los ANgeles - I thought that here would be consistant with miami and it's not - people here are boring and conservative and to into designers for my taste. I don't need to spend a thousand bucks on an outfit to feel and look sexy. I just look to show my waist, tits and ass

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    Veteran Member MonicaF's Avatar
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    Thumbs down Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    oh and one more thing - I hate tunics too, the ONLY reason they're hot right now is because of those damn girls from that show "the hills" . They all received tons of free clothes from that Betsey Johnson chick and al she designs are frumpy frocks.

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by MonicaF View Post
    well, call me a cheap miami hoochie, but online I like:
    www.greatglam.com
    www.hotfash.com
    It's not about cheap vs. expensive. I'm actually complaining that the clothing in my price range is about 99% tunics. I really don't like to spend too much money on clothing but I'm getting frustrated that nothing DIFFERENT is coming my way.

    In a perfect world.... I'd have an amazing sexy yet sophisticated dress for $5. http://www.bergdorfgoodman.com/store...t230300&cmCat=

    Sexy, form fitting, and oh so chic! I just won't spend that much. Can't do it.


    There are plenty of hideous AND expensive clothing items out there... take this for example...... http://www.tobi.com/product/9876-eli...resses?cmp=fgl



    So it's not about cheap vs. pricey, bad vs. good. Not at all. It's about annoyingly the same vs. the hope for something.... anything... DIFFERENT.
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by MonicaF View Post
    oh and one more thing - I hate tunics too, the ONLY reason they're hot right now is because of those damn girls from that show "the hills" . They all received tons of free clothes from that Betsey Johnson chick and al she designs are frumpy frocks.
    Gah! I hate those skanks. Borrowed the image from L.C.'s fashion line.....


    SKIRTS...

    You're Wearing them WRONG!
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    Veteran Member MonicaF's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    that looks like one skirt on top of another skirt. These clothes are just for women without bodies - period.

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    God/dess ahmeerah's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    I feel your pain. Bebe has stuff to show waist.

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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Not fucking cute..... Okay?



    .......SRSLY!
    I think that is adorable...just not on my body type .

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    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Have you been to a LVL X store? A lot of the times I find cute/sexy shit there.

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    God/dess Sophia_Starina's Avatar
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    Default Re: I Officially Hate Tunics

    Quote Originally Posted by Vyanka View Post
    Have you been to a LVL X store? A lot of the times I find cute/sexy shit there.

    Never heard of it.... do tell
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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