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Thread: The Approach

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    Default The Approach

    I feel like my approach has stopped working and I am hitting a wall of no's, so it is time to change it up.

    What is your approach? What is the first thing you say to a guy when you walk up to him?

    Mine is:
    Hi! You look like your ready for some company! ( said as I am sitting down)

    BUT...it stopped workign. They just say no, no i'm not ready for company, no dont sit down, no i dont want ot waste yoru time, no i just had a dance, nonono.

    So obviously, this is no longer working. I have to change it up.

    So whats your approach?

  2. #2
    Featured Member keira0304's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    I've never gotten a no when i do this.

    1. Spot victim. usually single, middle aged- NOT AT RACK
    2. Make eye contact from across the room, flirt with eyes, smile coyly.
    3. Walk up all seductive-like, kneel in between their knees, place hands on knees/thighs
    4. Look up at them and introduce self.....say whatever comes natural
    5. usually they will ask for a dance themselves or immediately say yes when asked.
    "Life and death, energy and peace. If I stop today it was still worth it. Even the terrible mistakes that I made and would have unmade if I could. The pains that have burned me and scarred my soul, it was worth it, for having been allowed to walk where I've walked, which was to hell on earth, heaven on earth, back again, into, under, far in between, through it, in it, and above."

    [/URL]

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    Default Re: The Approach

    guys at my club refuse to make eye contact. They are getting bombarded over and over by 350 different girls. They try not to make eye contact because that just invites even more girls to come over and they need a break. They are exausted from the constant bombardment. I bet on average a guy at the club for an hour will get asked 25 times at least.

    So I can't make eye contact..and I need somethign unique, a reason they will say yes to me after turning down the previous 10 girls.

    I will try the kneeling between their legs and looking up at them to introduce myself...

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    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    Ah, mine is a little old fashion I guess.
    Hey sexy, what's your name? (while stroking neck)
    response
    My name is ***** (while holding hand).
    Are you having fun at ****** tonight?
    response
    I would love to dance for you!
    done
    Last edited by shasta; 09-30-2008 at 05:22 AM.

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    Default Re: The Approach

    ^ LOL.

    After searchign through HH...it's apparent that the fault is asking if they want my company instead of just giving it to them. It has alwasy worked well for me in the past, and generally helps me weed out the nonspenders, because ofthey do want company, they will buy. However, i'm not trying to sell them at all.

    So I think what I need to do is just walk up to them and go into my spiel, kneeling down next to them instead of asking to sit and then going into my hustle.
    The hustle only takes a few seconds anyway, so I might as well just throw it out there to every single guy and see what happens.

  6. #6
    Featured Member Jeska's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    I never ask if they want company, it's too easy for them to say no. Maybe you should try being more aggressive?


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    Default Re: The Approach

    I would just go up to them, not say anything and bend over right in front of them and sit down. That usually got their attention and distract them before saying "no". Sometimes actions speak way louder than words, especially when competing with that many girls. Or I would sneak up behind them rub my nails on their neck and whisper something in their ear. It kind of gets them going before even seeing who you are. I know exactly what you're going through, I worked at that club for four years.

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    Featured Member keira0304's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    i read that a girl on here (forgot who) maybe mily?? did the ignore approach. Go and sit at a table near a guy, or next to a guy. Don't say a word to him, don't look at him. fix your shoe, drink your drink, watch the stage, do everything BUT pay attention to him.... and then he'll be more interested in talking to you

    Ive been trying it and it works.
    "Life and death, energy and peace. If I stop today it was still worth it. Even the terrible mistakes that I made and would have unmade if I could. The pains that have burned me and scarred my soul, it was worth it, for having been allowed to walk where I've walked, which was to hell on earth, heaven on earth, back again, into, under, far in between, through it, in it, and above."

    [/URL]

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    Senior Member AlexisXTC461's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    ^^^ I do this sometimes, and it does actually work...but i wouldn't rely only on that type of hustle

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    Veteran Member MichelleJade's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    Quote Originally Posted by keira0304 View Post
    i read that a girl on here (forgot who) maybe mily?? did the ignore approach. Go and sit at a table near a guy, or next to a guy. Don't say a word to him, don't look at him. fix your shoe, drink your drink, watch the stage, do everything BUT pay attention to him.... and then he'll be more interested in talking to you

    Ive been trying it and it works.
    I tried this and ugh, I find it wastes too much time, just sitting there idlely, drives me crazy!

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Isabella View Post
    guys at my club refuse to make eye contact. They are getting bombarded over and over by 350 different girls. They try not to make eye contact because that just invites even more girls to come over and they need a break. They are exausted from the constant bombardment. I bet on average a guy at the club for an hour will get asked 25 times at least.

    So I can't make eye contact..and I need somethign unique, a reason they will say yes to me after turning down the previous 10 girls.

    I will try the kneeling between their legs and looking up at them to introduce myself...
    This happened to this one fellow, and then they'd go right to his friend and ask him too.

    So I go up to the guy and say, "Hi, my name's Emma." Him: "How are you?" Me: *ignores* "So guess what? I'm just going to go right up to you, ask for a dance in an unimagitive way and then when you say no, I'm just going to go straight to your friend."
    He bought a dance! Ha, sometimes being being sarcastic and honest are great traits.
    There's only so much you can learn in one place...
    The longer you wait, the more time that you waste.

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    Veteran Member ultra_manic's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    oooo good question *runs to get stripper notebook*
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    what's the difference between aspirin and a stripper's boyfriend?
    Aspirin works.
    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.
    A text I got:
    When a guy talks dirty to a woman it's sexual harassment, when a woman talks dirty to a man it's $3.95 a minute!


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    Senior Member Luna Louise's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    If you're in a club where there are non-stop approaches watch what the other girls do and do something different. Differentiate Your Product!

    All the girls lay it on really thick? Approach with a funny joke and lead into a silly story (make it up before work. Lots of joke resources online)

    All the girls do a fast "wanna dance" hustle? Spend 2 min talking to the guy regularly before pouring on the flirt.

    All girls look similar as far as outfits, style? Add something like a conversation piece to your attire. Crazy necklace, odd hair clip. Make yourself stand out. I used to wear this odd necklace with a tiger climbing up my neck. Good way to make guys interested in you. Different clip in hair extensions etc.

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    God/dess LuckyOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    Very competetive industry right now. I understand your situation. The best advice I have to give is do a an outstanding job building rapport. Have more personality than the other dancers. Be entertaining, crack jokes- be sexy and friendly and cool at the same time. Wear more expensive outfits. You have to stand out above the rest.

    That's all I can say right now...

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    Default Re: The Approach

    i don't have a specific approach. but i really like kieara's... & i plan on using it tonight. i'll let you know how it works.

    i also believe luna's philosophy when it coms to standing out in the crowd.

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    Default Re: The Approach

    I think the line you were originally saying is not a very great one. "You look ready for some company!" I don't know, it just sounds like, "you look ready for a dance!" and I've heard time and time again from guys that they at least want a hello or something from the dancer before they say yes. And when you ask if they want company it's like asking them to make a decision right then if they want you or not. Like walking into a car dealership and the saleslady says, Okay! you look ready to sit in this convertable!" Just too much, too soon IMO.

    When I was dancing in your town, with 350 other dancers I totally tailored my approach to be more unique. You're right that guys get so bitter about being bombarded by the same approach all night long "hey" "are you having a good time?""what's your name?" "where are you from?" blah blah blah. So I'd try to say something different, or just not ask at all, just introduce myself.

    And, I highly recommend not asking if you can sit with them, or if they want company. Just sit down. And this goes for any size club. I stopped asking a year ago and it has done a lot. You'll still be able to tell if you should move on and not waste time, but it helps a lot if they are borderline, and otherwise would have told you they didn't want company, sometimes you can convince them .
    And, I'm a lapsitter in Vegas, I figure you have to use all you got there, so I'd plop down and lean into them and say something like, "so what is it like being approached by hot girls all night long? Is it fun, or overwhelming?" I'd ask them stuff like that, I'd just try to get them to open up and tell me about themselves. Being slutty is great, drunk and ditzy, it can work, BUT I've noticed that whenever I've sold hour VIPS they've almost always happened with a more down-to-earth, girl-next-door approach. It's like to spend that kinda money the customer wants to feel like he can trust you and that he feels emotionally connected to you as well as physically. So I'd use the whole, "this is such a busy night! I mean I love it, but I'm kind of overwhelmed. Do you like clubs? Are you a party animal?!" Just start in. Then you can always stop yourself, "Oh I didn't even ask your name, sorry, what is it?" then you can introduce yourself and even make a joke about your stage name or something, just stuff that can make you stand out and seem more "real" than the other dancers. Because guys are on the defensive in Vegas, they get tired of the same hustle from all the dancers. They want something authentic.

    The original post is a month old, and I don't think you are even dancing anymore but I felt like posting a long response Too much coffee.
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

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    Senior Member Butrcup98's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    Personally, I love the "look-away". When the guy looks at you and the moment you make eye contact, he looks away, but then tries to use his peripherals.

    When guys tell me they don't want a dance or company, I follow up with "Good, because I don't want to dance. I just want a place to chill. My boss is testy tonight and it looks better if I'm sitting with someone." Then I strike up my normal convo.

    1)What's his name?
    2) Where's he from?
    3)Has he been here before.

    After question 3 I usually go on about how great my club is and how grateful I am that I get to work there. I briefly mention the "private" VIP rooms and then move on to how friendly the girls are, etc. Then I'll try to find something he likes to talk about.

    After 2 or 3 songs, I'll say "Well, better get back to work. It was nice talking to you." Then I leave and go sit with someone else. Eventually, I'll go back to him and he usually says yes.

    If I'm REALLY desperate. I'll hand out a few free dances to different customers. Looking busy is good for business.

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    Default Re: The Approach

    After 7 years at one club I switched about 6 weeks ago to a much more popular and much larger club. I had a lot of regulars at my other club so never needed to hustle, but money was still slower and they follow me wherever I go. It took me a week or so, but now even on shifts without any of my regulars I make a ton more at my new club.

    I make it a game, make it fun, and set goals for myself, not how much I am going to make, but little activities to do throughout my shift. For me, my first goal is to always get my first paid dance within 30 minutes of hitting the floor. Here is the approach that I use and it has me banking no matter what day/night, or shift I work.

    Once I get out on the floor, I spend a couple of minutes watching. I usually focus on the center of the floor where everyone else can see and I watch for the guy that is getting a lot of attention but no dances. For me this does two things, one when I go up to someone that is not getting dances from anyone, there is no pressure on me so I am usually a lot more relaxed, and also if he does get a dance then the guys around him wonder why. I go up to him and introduce myself, usually with hi my name is Kisa, how are you doing tonight? Then I mention that I notice that he is not spending time with anyone and this is usually a pretty good conversation starter because he will tell me exactly why he has said no to everyone else and I know what not to do, and even if he says he doesn't get dances right off the bat, that saves me time and I move right on to step 2, asking for the favor. The thing is, I know, that no matter what he says I am going to ask him for the dance. When I feel the time is right, usually not that long since I have already seen he is not the dancing type, I will ask him. Half the time they say yes. When they say no, I ask them if they would mind doing me a favor and let me give them a free dance. They pretty much all say yes and most of them still pay me for it in the end. Even when they don't I almost always get a dance from guys around them because....he got a dance with me and only me, and I made sure that he is out somewhere in the center of the floor where lots of people can see me give my dance. For whatever reason I am one of those dancers, that once I get that first dance, I am busy the rest of my shift.

    I know that a lot of people don't recommend a free dance, and the ones that do only do it when they are desperate, but I have to tell you that since I started doing this, getting that first dance right after I get to work really gets me jump started, and I have been averaging 4 figure 6 hour shifts for the last 3-4 weeks. I am going to keep using it till it stops working.

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    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    That's great that it's working for you . I'd just personally hate to be the girl after you who gets the guy saying, "pay you? I just got a free dance. I don't pay for my dances."
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

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    Default Re: The Approach

    Quote Originally Posted by Butrcup98 View Post
    Personally, I love the "look-away". When the guy looks at you and the moment you make eye contact, he looks away, but then tries to use his peripherals.

    When guys tell me they don't want a dance or company, I follow up with "Good, because I don't want to dance. I just want a place to chill. My boss is testy tonight and it looks better if I'm sitting with someone." Then I strike up my normal convo.

    1)What's his name?
    2) Where's he from?
    3)Has he been here before.

    After question 3 I usually go on about how great my club is and how grateful I am that I get to work there. I briefly mention the "private" VIP rooms and then move on to how friendly the girls are, etc. Then I'll try to find something he likes to talk about.

    After 2 or 3 songs, I'll say "Well, better get back to work. It was nice talking to you." Then I leave and go sit with someone else. Eventually, I'll go back to him and he usually says yes.

    If I'm REALLY desperate. I'll hand out a few free dances to different customers. Looking busy is good for business.

    No no no, never ever, ever give dances away for free! This just further devalues the worth of dances. Perhaps this strategy works for you in the short run, but if other girls are equally desperate and catch on to your gimmick, they'll start doing the same thing. Then it'll be 10x harder to SELL a dance cuz guys will go in expecting (yup) free dances.

    Unfortunately, theres too many scumbags out there eager to take advantage of a girls good nature, so being too nice in this biz can seriously hurt your money.

    Spend less time trying to earn their money, and figure out more ways you can cost it.

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    Default Re: The Approach

    Quote Originally Posted by holiday View Post
    That's great that it's working for you . I'd just personally hate to be the girl after you who gets the guy saying, "pay you? I just got a free dance. I don't pay for my dances."
    Exactly. And once the practice becomes standard, good luck making ANY money. If you don't get ran out of the club that is.

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    Default Re: The Approach

    Quote Originally Posted by ~Isabella View Post
    I feel like my approach has stopped working and I am hitting a wall of no's, so it is time to change it up.

    What is your approach? What is the first thing you say to a guy when you walk up to him?

    Mine is:
    Hi! You look like your ready for some company! ( said as I am sitting down)

    BUT...it stopped workign. They just say no, no i'm not ready for company, no dont sit down, no i dont want ot waste yoru time, no i just had a dance, nonono.

    So obviously, this is no longer working. I have to change it up.

    So whats your approach?

    Asking if they want company makes it too easy for them to say no. I find that being super nice inhibits my earning potential because it confines me to customers that are already interested. Whereas with a more aggressive approach, I'm more likely to get a 'yes' from someone who probobly would've said 'no' or 'maybe later'.

    Don't be afraid to be bold, even to a cheesy degree! I blatantly wiggle my way towards a guy, plop right into his lap, start running my nails down his arms, neck, etc. and whisper things like "Hey there, stud!", "Boy, would I like to violate you!" or "I bet you work hard, play hard, and get even harder. Lets find out!" This works WAY better for me than trying to win 'em over with a nice persona.

    Remember that men go to strip clubs to be sexually aroused. So play up the sex kitten factor.

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    Member Kisa7513's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Approach

    That is why I pick the guy that doesn't get dances. Like I said most of them pay me even though I told them it would be free. The ones that don't wouldn't be paying for the dance anyway because they are the guys that sit all night and don't buy girls drinks, tip them, or get dances.

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