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Thread: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

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    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    So i've been with this guy for 3 weeks and i can already tell this is a guy i'm goin to really be with for a while. He is smart and very caring. A week ago i told him i was a dancer. He said he was shocked and that it was very "unorthodox" but that its not something he would leave me for nor try to change.

    Now that i've told him, ive been very open about it...almost casual about buying gowns and goin to auditions, and other dancing related topics...

    and i have noticed that he gets quiet or awkward when i bring it up...not upset, but kind of stand-off-ish about it...

    should i worry or is he just gonna need some time to get used to it?

    should i stop bringing it up or is it a good idea to keep it in casual convo so its not such a big deal anymore?





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

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    Senior Member Jabba_WTF?'s Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Sounds like he might just not be so open to seeing/knowing details.
    Maybe he'll be less awkward if he knows, but doesnt see?

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    I say bring it up. If he's important to you don't keep it inside.

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    I agree, continue to be open about it. I don't know how long you've been a dancer, but if its something you enjoy, its a part of you, you know? and he should accept it

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    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by cutey5032 View Post
    I agree, continue to be open about it. I don't know how long you've been a dancer, but if its something you enjoy, its a part of you, you know? and he should accept it
    i think he understands that and WANTS to...but is maybe having some trouble with it....idk





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Mia,

    From the guys point of view, it may be that he doesn't want to think about you dancing for other guys. I mean his experience of SC may be colored by going to the clubs with friends or he may not know what happens in clubs from the dancers perspective.

    So I agree with everyone else, just sit down and discuss the situation with him, explaining that dancing is just a job.

    If he doesn't understand what happens in the SC his imagination may run away with him and that could effect the relationship in the future.

    Hope this helps, good luck with the relationship.

    J

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    just play it by ear for a while. it sounds to me like it will be a problem for him but only time will tell.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    You told a guy you go to school with?

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    my boyfriend doesnt have a problem with me dancing but he does the same thing when i talk about work. basically he doesnt want to hear any details on who im stripping down and dancing for, but it doesnt mean that he sees my job as a problem. its been like this for 2 years and it doesnt cause any problems in our relationship. do you have any dancer friends that have boyfriends you two could double with? i think that would make him feel alot more comfortable with the situation too because he can see that they are making it work also and if he has any concerns hes more likely to talk about it with another guy thats in the same situation to put his mind at ease.

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    Veteran Member grindonme's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    The "standoffish" attitude when you bring it up is a sign on trouble. What is his view of stripclubs and has he ever been to one? Whats the difference between a gown club and regular stripclub

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    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    You told a guy you go to school with?
    yea, i kno, i kno

    the millions of girls on my other thread told me that would be a huge mistake.... but they also said i could never have a normal relationship and keep this a secret....so i went out on a limb and told him





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

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    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by jessica0585 View Post
    my boyfriend doesnt have a problem with me dancing but he does the same thing when i talk about work. basically he doesnt want to hear any details on who im stripping down and dancing for, but it doesnt mean that he sees my job as a problem. its been like this for 2 years and it doesnt cause any problems in our relationship. do you have any dancer friends that have boyfriends you two could double with? i think that would make him feel alot more comfortable with the situation too because he can see that they are making it work also and if he has any concerns hes more likely to talk about it with another guy thats in the same situation to put his mind at ease.

    no... i wish!!! i haven't even started dancing again yet.... let alone acquired any dancing friends...





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

  13. #13
    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by grindonme View Post
    The "standoffish" attitude when you bring it up is a sign on trouble. What is his view of stripclubs and has he ever been to one? Whats the difference between a gown club and regular stripclub
    he says he has never been to one because "strip clubs aren't [his] style"....and i believe that he hasn't been to one before. He is 21, but doesn't drink....a lil bit of a nerd lol... i don't think he would know what to do in a stripclub.... plus, he doesn't have the money for it....

    and there is no big difference between a gown club and a reg stripclub... gown clubs are just a lil bit more uptight





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

  14. #14
    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Mia Roberts View Post
    yea, i kno, i kno

    the millions of girls on my other thread told me that would be a huge mistake.... but they also said i could never have a normal relationship and keep this a secret....so i went out on a limb and told him
    I know you're stuck between a rock and a hard place on that... if you guys break up and he tells anyone, I highly advise you to spread rumors he goes to hookers and likes to dress up like Tina Turner. Character assassination WORKS to stop rumors!

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    I know you're stuck between a rock and a hard place on that... if you guys break up and he tells anyone, I highly advise you to spread rumors he goes to hookers and likes to dress up like Tina Turner. Character assassination WORKS to stop rumors!
    True and funny as shit!

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    Featured Member Ms. Mia Roberts's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    I know you're stuck between a rock and a hard place on that... if you guys break up and he tells anyone, I highly advise you to spread rumors he goes to hookers and likes to dress up like Tina Turner. Character assassination WORKS to stop rumors!
    LMFAO!!!



    will do!!





    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    If they are spending money, we don't call them stalkers. We call them Regulars.
    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_Luscious View Post
    Fuck these people, seriously. Fuck them in the ass without lube or warning.
    LMAO!!!!

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    Veteran Member ellebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    My boyfriend goes all quiet when I talk about the details of work. So other than "I hate a really good/bad night" I don't go into details. It works for us.
    The world's most uncoordinated stripper

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Would it help if you told him what your limits are, being a little more conservative than you could be at you most daring, just in case. Tell him about the need for money in a short time period so you can study. THEN ask if he wants you to do less if this makes sense, and what that might do to your earnings. Maybe it wouldn't help, but an impartial rational person would know you are trying to accommodate their feelings. This part is most important, it seems to me.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    I wouldn't bring it up in casual conversation. It sounds like your bf is like mine... he doesn't LIKE the job, but he understands that it's how you make a living and it's part of the package if he wants to be with you. Please stop rubbing it in the poor guys face. Stuff like, "I had a bad/ good night" is fine, but he doesn't need the details.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Featured Member greggy's Avatar
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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    Yea, if he goes awkwardly quiet, it's best to keep the details to a minimum. If he wants to know more details, he'll ask. The good night/bad night description is good enough.

    I catch myself doing this with the guy I'm seeing: if work is on my mind, I talk about it... a lot. I met him at the club, and he doesn't mind hearing about it, but sometimes I just need to keep my mouth shut. He will ask questions though when he wants to, and he knows I'll answer freely. So rather than bombard him with all the details, I'm now making an effort to let him make the move.

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    If I was the guy. I would probably feel the same way. I don't particuarly like it, but I understand that's its the job you've got and want. But I also wouldn't want to really hear about it.

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    Default Re: New boyfriend in college...is he REALLY okay w/ me dancin?

    My boyfriend doesn't like my job, but he loves me. I don't talk about it and I keep my stripper clothes away from him. Aside from saying stuff like I'm working tonight, or if something really funny happened, I don't mention it to him. It works for now. I think if we start talking marriage we'll have to discuss it but for now it's ok.

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