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Thread: Anti-Social phases?

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    Member Rian Winters's Avatar
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    Default Anti-Social phases?

    I have been dancing 4 years now, since I was 18, and have recently felt myself falling into a funk. My hustle has always been very strong and I do well making friends and being the fun "party girl" wherever I work...

    But recently it has been SO hard for me to talk to anyone who isnt a regular customer of mine already. I just cant seem to get over the first line and end up calling people in each night to save me from the anxiety of meeting anyone new.

    Any tips on how to cheer myself up or get over this silly fear of rejection? Its obviously cutting into my money and in return making me even more depressed and even LESS likely to talk to anyone.

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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    I definitely go through phases like this. Usually when I...

    1) Have been working too much
    2) Haven't seen people I love in awhile (sisters, SO's, etc.)
    3) Haven't been outside much (which clears my head).

    I'll go upstairs from the dressing room and just be totally intimidated by the prospect of talking to the same guys whom I hustled effortlessly just a week ago. Even though I know it's illogical, I can't get out of my slump.

    To cure this, I...

    1) Address the three problems listed above which are usually dragging me down.
    2) Try to walk onto the floor looking perky and excited. I don't force myself to talk to anyone--instead, I try to get them to come up and talk to me. This way, they begin my hustle for me. I try to draw people to me to avoid having to approach people who are possibly not even interested in me in the first place.

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    Featured Member dangerousdiva's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    ^ How do you get them to come to you?


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    Veteran Member Rockell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    I hate to condone drinking at work, but try having a glass of wine or two before you start working. That always helped me feel social.....

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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    ^ How do you get them to come to you?
    You become the party girl who is having an awesome time. Smile at everyone, play music you love/dance well on stage: even if you don't talk to anyone, try to exude (even if it's totally fake) confidence and a fun-loving attitude.

    If I act like I'm having a great time, then usually I'll have someone come up to me. Which can help get me out of my rut.

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    Veteran Member oregonchick's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    I know how you feel. I have suffered from that problem. It is really hard to overcome. In a way it is good because you are not super social and talk to every broke ass tom dick and harry. You can focus more on who has money to spend on you. I do recommend that you force yourself out of your funk and focus on new customers. Perhaps, you should try another club for a bit and not tell your regulars where you are going that way you are totally dependant on new customers. I don't think that you should drink alcohol to be comfortable because that just becomes a bad habit. After you force yourself to hustle, take a minivacation as a treat then go back to your old club with your new regulars from your new club

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    Member Rian Winters's Avatar
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    Default Re: Anti-Social phases?

    Great advice from everyone, thank you so much!

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