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Thread: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

  1. #1
    Veteran Member Lola_sinn's Avatar
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    Default Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Hello all, I found this forum a while ago and lurked a little bit, as even though I have never been a dancer I find strip clubs and the people who work in them to be fascinating. Right now I am considering becoming a dancer too, and I thought I should join so I can get better info. This is an awesome forum and I've already learned a lot since joining, which is awesome since you can definitely never be too prepared as a newbie dancer!

    Soo, here is what I would like to ask you ladies about. I have an extremely alt look going on. I am super pale, even in the summer sun I barely tan at all. I also have a big tattoo on my left upper arm. I wear my hair in synth dreads. I have tattoos on my feet that I don't like being on display, so I intend to wear big stompy goth boots in the club.

    My question is...would this help or hinder my ability to hustle? I have read several posts advising girls not too look too goth or wear too much black as it can intimidate customers. However, I feel that the goth look is very much a part of my identity. I've been dressing this way for probably 7 or 8 years now (I'll be 21 in a couple weeks) and by this point I have definitely evolved my own style that works well for me. In fact I feel awkward and unattractive if I wear too much plain or colorful clothing! I think this is again due to my paleness. I have never had a problem with lack of male attention, despite my "intimidating" sense of style. Hell, many days I can't even go outside in jeans and a grubby hoodie without getting hollered at! Not to mention, I am not at all shy about dancing onstage...I used to go to goth clubs a lot, and I would always dance on the stage rather than the dance floor. The DJ's would often put spotlights on me while I was dancing too...so I must be pretty good to look at!

    Personally, I think I have the personal style, confidence, and body to pull it off. But then, I have never even set foot in a strip club. What doyou guys (the pros) think? Here's a few links to help you judge. The first two are the way I usually wear my hair, and the second two are just body shots(although they are 5 or 6 months old and I've lost some weight and getten more toned since then). My measurements, in case that is important, are 32F-26-40.

    http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/e...ter/photo1.jpg
    http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/e...ister/lulz.jpg
    http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/e...ettobooty1.jpg
    http://i232.photobucket.com/albums/e...ettobooty2.jpg

    Also, could anyone reccomend some clubs in Philly that would be likely to accept someone who looks like me? I know Delilah's is out of the question. A friend of mine reccomended Club Risque and Rick's, but I'm curious what you guys think too.

    Thanks for all your help! And sorry if this post doesn't make too much sense...I just woke up

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    Member Wintre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I know exactly how you feel. You're probably not going to like my response though. I went through the same experience, though my style is more of a combo of death rock and romantigoth. When I first started dancing I spoke using those exact words. I thought I'd be the really hot goth chick who wore a bondage collar, and people would be totally into it and associate my collar with rough sex, right? Most people just associate that look with being intimidating, despite how sexual it will make you feel.

    Sadly, though some really get it, those people rarely have good money. I still look totally goth, especially my boots, but the rest of me is toned down and girly...still only black and white or black and red (men LOVE red)...but more lacey and less bondagey. Not only that, but I've learned that if I hide my septum ring I make more, but if I see a customer with facial piercings I pull it down just for him and then compliment his labret or whatever. Guys with facial piercings love a stripper with facial piercings. I would try to avoid the synth dreads...maybe a plain black wig or something?

    I still have a pvc garter belt I take out and a few other gothy things...but I try to keep a variety in my bag and try to base it on the custies. And eventually you'll get used to letting go of your identity at work and care more about money. I know you don't believe me yet but you'll see. And to think I was initially excited about finally having a job where I wouldn't have to hide my piercings or wear a uniform or whatever and could be "me". Even the most vanilla girl puts on a persona. Try not to forget its supposed to be a job, not a party.

    At my work I get compliments all the time, mostly from other dancers, about how I stand out in a good way. I think the trick is to still be goth but balance it out by being as feminine as possible...think lace, ruffles, and big eyelashes. Also, try to avoid the smokey black eyeshadow thing as hot as it is, realize that 9/10 custies aren't going to be into it.

    I totally understand about the color thing! When I first was ready to admit I need more to wear than black, if for no other reason than the fact that most of the "normal" girls in the club are also in all black and you need a reason to stand out, it was really difficult to start "seeing" the colors on the shelfs...but now I am totally in love with white trims that glow in the black light, along with black stuff too. I still have to admit feeling a little awkward next to a more conventional stripper wearing only black and I have red on or something, but whatever, I stand out more right? You need to find the right balance between standing out too much and not standing out enough. Unlike most people, you're going to have to tone it down rather than play it up...and I think that transition is a harder one.

    I should probably stop. As far as clubs in your area goes, I have no idea. I work in Portland where the goth look works better than most other places.

    I guess my final word of advice would be to focus more on being HOT and not so much on being YOU...then you can use all of that money and buy yourself new dreaded falls or goggles or something :-P

    If you have questions we can exchange screen names or myspaces or something and I'd be happy to talk to you.

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    Member Wintre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    PS...you're hella pretty and your dreads are fucking awesome.

    i think you'll do fine...but keep everything i said in mind. Are your eyebrows drawn on?

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    Moderator Miss_McKenna's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I don't really have much productive advice I'm 'fraid, although I think Philly would be a pretty good place to be if you're going to try for that look. I'm down in the south and I don't know it if would fly here.

    Just wanted to say that you're really hot!


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    Member indie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    You are really hot! Gorgeous face, girl.

    I'm not dancing yet, but I think Lola_Sinn knows what she is talking about. Men are easily intimidated by things they are not accustomed to. Like the skittish fawn, you must approach them slowly ...

    But really, you are gorgeous, and SW is the best place I've come across to get ANY kind of advice about these things! From my inexperienced perspective, I think that it would probably be easier for you to do well in the biz if you soften your look a bit. Just from that one picture, your face is GORGEOUS. Don't let your hair distract from that lovely mug! I think you could definitely work a lolita-kinda thing, as she mentioned.

    I'm afraid I can't help with the club question. Maybe hit Club Chat?

    Either way, best of luck, and keep us posted!

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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I work with a girl with dread falls and a hot body. I aggree with the no leather just lace , neon or fishnet advice. There really arent that many guys who are into bondage that go to strip clubs. I think if you get really good at flirting though and get a good hustle u could make some money though cuz youre pretty. Youre in a good city for that look though

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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    as for which club maybe find out which one in your area attracts bikers or younger artsy guys too. the older crowd will likely have the least interest.

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    Veteran Member *~Angel~*'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I agree with everything said. I love your hair too by the way... its pretty hot. But the colors might be a lil too bright in some areas, but thats my opinions.

    You are very hot by the way. I agree, go lacy. Lace is always pretty. Your hair is also very pretty.

    Im not in the philly area, but i know in mine that would go over well, but it all depends on the club you are wanting to work at. I would also look at the club list. I have a few sites to give you that you might be able to find more clubs. I gotta find it though quick.

    ^^
    stripclublist.com
    (^i believe that one also has reviews from the dancers as well as the customers, might be helpful)
    tuscl.com
    Last edited by *~Angel~*; 03-03-2009 at 01:26 PM. Reason: New website info

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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    You are very gorgeous, and I'm sure you know that. The goth look works for you. But that extreme look can be really, really intimidating for guys. There will be guys who love it and will follow you around slavishly, but most of the regular guys probably will be too intimidated for it. You can probably keep the colors in your hair, but I don't know about the dreds. If you straightened your hair and kept it the black and purple, it would be wicked, wicked hot. And you can wear a lot of black and only have like a black ribbon or little collar or something, and see if that works before you go all out with buying the fetish wear.

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    Veteran Member Oksana23's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I am sorry to say that I can not see someone with your type of look, especially the hair, making money at the clubs I currently dance at. The girls who make the money here have the glam Victoria Secret model type look, long lashes and hair, tan, big boobs ect. Some clubs won't even hire girls with more than 1-2 tattoo's, but it really, really, depends on the club and its location. PS: You look like you are in class by the background of the 1st 2 pics, so maybe a sexy goth schoolgirl thing could work for you? I would go to the clubs in your area as a customer and check out who looks like they are making the money, and see if there are any alternative type girls. Or just strike up a convo with one of the dancers and ask her the same questions you are asking us, she will have a much better idea since she works there.
    Can't help it, I'm a born....[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Veteran Member *~Angel~*'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Ahh, true, best to ask girls in the club that you wish to audition at.

    ^^ But then again standing out might be a good thing, as well as a very bad thing. You never know until you ask, or heck even watch the customers to see what they are more into.

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    Featured Member saphire123456's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    well you're hot and stuff, but guys do scare easily if you go overboard with the goth. especially guys with money. thats why its important to throw in a bit of mainstream. now, the clubs that you mention- risque and delilahs - not gonna hire you with those threads- sorry. maybe only the risque that used to be dangerous curves. ricks is now club onyx - a black club, so i don't know how they feel about the alternative look.
    These days I like to count my money. I like to wash it delicately and iron it. Sometimes I dry it with some bounty to make it all nice and cuddly. I love my money... did I say that out loud?

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    Veteran Member Lola_sinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Quote Originally Posted by Miss_McKenna View Post
    I don't really have much productive advice I'm 'fraid, although I think Philly would be a pretty good place to be if you're going to try for that look. I'm down in the south and I don't know it if would fly here.

    Just wanted to say that you're really hot!
    Heh. I might be moving to the south in the near future, and that's actually one of the reasons I am considering stripping NOW to save up some money beforehand.

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    Veteran Member Lola_sinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Thanks for all the advice ladies! (And the compliments) This is very helpful to hear as I was considering going for a more cybery-sex slave look but I guess I will have to scrap that idea. I think I'll try to go super-feminine instead. I wasn't really planning on wearing too much makeup anyway as anything beyond basic eyeliner and maybe some pastel eyeshadow or nude lipstick makes me look washed out and trashy. Wasn't really planning on wearing leather either, but it's still good to know that that's a no-no.

    I'm figuring I'll just wear mostly black with the occasional neon or pastel accent...Hell most of my underwear collection looks like that already! I'm also figuring I'll have to act very personable, sweet, and girly so I don't intimidate customers. I was planning on that beforehand but now I know I'll have to double my efforts to be charming.

    I actually don't think the dreads will be a huge problem...my friend who has worked in other Philly strip clubs got hired with synth dreads, and I've heard of other dancers in the area who have them actually making very good money.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wintre View Post
    PS...you're hella pretty and your dreads are fucking awesome.

    i think you'll do fine...but keep everything i said in mind. Are your eyebrows drawn on?
    Thank you! Actually they are 100% real! Just lucky I guess...I remember when I was a 15 year old goth girl and my friends were all jealous because I didn't have to draw them on

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    Moderator Miss_McKenna's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Yeah, just to add, a lot of girls at my club are the typical victoria's secret girls, but we have one or two *really* goth girls and they do fine too because they stand out. one in particular has tattoo's almost head-to-toe but she always rakes in the cash!


  20. #16
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    Thumbs up Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    agreed with what many have said....here in portland you could maybe get away with the hair and you are totally hot, there are a lot of dancers here covered in tattoos, just try to find a club where that look will work. a smaller club will work better than a big one where most girls have tans, big boobs and acrylics. in philly you might have to get rid of the dreds though and just have black/purple hair....I have blonde and purple hair and flat iron it, I used to tease it up huge metal style but I've toned it down a bit and made more money. Guys love my tattoos and often tip more because of them.

    I would say if you are going to wear boots find some stripper boots, like these:

    stay away from stompy platforms and goth clothes in the club. you can pull off the alterna thing but you need to refine it, maybe get a light tan to even out your skin tone and get real stripper outfits (bikinis etc) that are a little punk looking (skulls etc) but stay away from leather, bondage gear, costume fetish dresses and the like.
    something like this:

    Guys want to see a stripper not a domme, as has been said most guys will go to fetish nights at the club or a lingerie shop if they are into bdsm.

    good luck honey!

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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Yeah...I'd agree with everyone else-- you're beautiful, but you need to consider the kind of clientele your look will attract.

    My guess is you'll get a lot of the younger guys...a.k.a. guys without money! If you're cool with that, then I think you could be a kind of novelty at the club. I'm sure you'll look awesome on stage, and you're probably very entertaining. But that doesn't mean your look will translate into money.

    Personally, I have never, never seen a goth-looking girl make good money. I've seen them get interest on stage since they stick out, but they never get dances and whatnot. So definitely listen to Wintre's advice: glam it up a LOT if you go for it. Both your attitude and clothing need to severely set off your alt. look--you should probably act super sweet and go for girly outfits. I can get away with being frank and sarcastic because I look like the quintessential 'girl next door'...but you clearly wouldn't!! :-)

    I work with a chick who is absolutely stunning--she looks like a Russian mafia model or something--big boobs, tiny waist, big butt, gorgeous face...but she doesn't tend to make money because of her attitude and her aesthetic. I hate to say it, but it's true: it can really intimidate guys.

    Anyway, good luck! And keep us updated!

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    Featured Member pixierocksonthepole's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I am going to go against the flow here. I think you will do absolutely fine as you are. One of my closest friends that still strips here in Chicago has really really long dreads. Loads of tats and she gets rough. The customers love it. I dress the same way you do and I wore the same at work and trust me the customers are few far and in between but once you hit them with your style as you are they will love you. You would be their naughty fetish that they are afraid to admit to outside of the club. Keep it. Be confident and dominant. Get close and intimate. Make them nervous but be the nicest girl they will get there. I made so much money the nights I wore my knee high pencil heel boots and my metal ring collar. Danced to Genitorturers and loads of industrial. Made even more on the nights that I wore latex. It's a pleasure of mine and worked out great for the customers.

    You are absolutely gorgeous as you are and you seem to love you as you are. Don't change for anyone or anything. You may never find you again. ^_^





  23. #19
    SpeakngEZ
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Honestly, I think I'm going to agree with a little of everyone here, but mostly with Pixie. I'm not as extreme as you are, but I definitely have the goth thing going, and I make money.

    But I'll tell you a secret and you have to promise not to call me racist: 3/4 of my regulars are Asians. They absolutely love a girl who looks different and usually have money. The ones without money usually like the generic blonde chick. Something to consider. But you have to approach them carefully and be prepared for intense pseudo-Asian-love/loyalty.

    You really have to tone down attitude more than anything else, though, because an intimidating look paired with an intimidating attitude will make you walk with jack shit in your wallet.

    Think femme! Red lace with black, electric blue, gold prints, anything that screams Xena, etc. My best money-making outfit is a gold snakeskin lace-up top and black mesh shorts with garter straps attached to nothing.

    Well, good luck! This is a look that takes a lot of trial and error. But no matter what, you'll eventually find something that makes YOU money, because that's really the bottom line. No one else's experience is going to be a sure match for yours.

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    Veteran Member misslizzy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    Everything Wintre said.

    You can get away with *some* weirdness. Half of my hair is cobalt blue. I dance to Combichrist, the Misfits, and Johnny Cash. I wear stripey socks from the renaissance faire as part of my outfits (I cut the purple/green ones into leg warmers, though).

    The trick is to Hot Topic yourself: make your look mainstream friendly. Colored hair? Yes. (Half the clubs I work in have lighting that makes my blue hair unnoticable unless you think Combichrist is more than just cool techno and start looking for other stuff to notice about me; this is perfect.) Big yarn dreads? As awesome as they look, most guys are going to think you look like an alien. Metalic and black outfits? Yes. Especially with fishnet (black, or layered black industrial net with some crazy hot pink fence net). Spikes and a bondage collar? Probably too much.

    If you're in Dallas, TX, don't change a thing, and go straight to the Clubhouse. You will probably not even be the most extreme-looking girl there. Which brings me to another point: all this advice is regional. Different states and cities all have very different standards of what a stripper should look/act like. My look works well in NJ and AZ, but would probably not make me a cent in Atlanta.

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    Veteran Member Sinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    "I've seen them get interest on stage since they stick out, but they never get dances and whatnot. "

    Then you must not have seen real goth.
    Seriously. Ive danced for 6 years with a not-so-subtle goth look. Ive made money, and i get dances on a regular basis. I also wear witchcraft jewelry, spiked collars and such. I dont do dreds, tattoos or piercings though. Think hardcore vamp betty paige. I made 160$ in dances when i walked out on the floor in my vampy outfit last time i was in the club.

    Its about the girl and *how* she hustles what she's got. What she wears doesnt make a difference in the end if shes got a good game, a good hustle. Most guys are going to assume youre domme, or a bitch, because of your look. its up to you to shatter their perceptions, or to give in to them. Either way, its about the hustle and the role that you want to play. Theres no way to make everyone happy. As long as youre comfortable, confident and sexy it will show.

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    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    ^^Agreed. And, as someone else mentioned, it's very regional. I personally live in a college town, so guys tend to come looking for the 'girl next door' type of appearance in a strip club.

    Through that comment, I in no way meant to demean or condemn all gothy girls! I was just describing my experience with them. :o)

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    Member kenitajonez's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    I used to have dreads, took them not too long ago. I think you are gorgeous and if I saw you I would get a dance, BUT I just don't think it would fly with the majority of people... They'd either be really turned off or really turned on, and its more likely they will be turned off. Just my .2 Let us know what you decide, I am interested to see how it works for you =)

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    Veteran Member Sinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    dreads are where i'd draw the line too if such a line would be drawn, lol.. and i do agree that it is regional. Im in FL and its hard to relate to some of the customers that come in the club. i ignore the young guys anyway and relate to the 35+ up crowd the best [because of my personality, not my looks]

    I wanted to add that it would be a good idea to know why she wanted to get into dancing? is it for the lifestyle or to make some cash? because if its more for fun and the cash is incidental then the look wouldnt matter as much. My husband works and makes enough that i dont have to work but i dance anyway just because i like dancing and I like to make some extra cash. So ive taken some crazy chances with some really gothy outfits just for fun. I just happen to like dancing and Ive taken liberties with my costume choices, style and music.

    but if she was stripping her way thru college, to pay bills or take care of children, car payment, new boobs, and things like that it would only make sense to tone the look down a bit to increase the potential for making funds$$.
    Last edited by Sinn; 03-05-2009 at 01:45 AM.

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    Veteran Member Sinn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is my look too extreme? (with pics)

    dreads are where i'd draw the line too if such a line would be drawn, lol.. and i do agree that it is regional. Im in FL and its hard to relate to some of the customers that come in the club. i ignore the young guys anyway and relate to the 35+ up crowd the best [because of my personality, not my looks]

    I wanted to add that it would be a good idea to know why she wanted to get into dancing? is it for the lifestyle or to make some cash? because if its more for fun and the cash is incidental then the look wouldnt matter as much. My husband works and makes enough that i dont have to work but i dance anyway just because i like dancing and I like to make some extra cash. So ive taken some crazy chances with some really gothy outfits just for fun. I just happen to like dancing and Ive taken liberties with my costume choices, style and music.

    but if she was stripping her way thru college, to pay bills or take care of children, car payment, new boobs, and things like that it would only make sense to tone the look down a bit to increase the potential for making funds$$.


    If you're in Dallas, TX, don't change a thing, and go straight to the Clubhouse. You will probably not even be the most extreme-looking girl there.
    Hell Yeah! a Goth strip club would be awesome. Freakin awesome!

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