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Thread: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

  1. #1
    Featured Member Lady Xplicit18's Avatar
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    Default Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    I've been dancing for the past 7 months and today I happen to go with my mom and oldest brother to Verizon to get a new phone (We're still under her account...I need credit first) so we decided to take one car there. Before this convo started, my mother and I had a little debate earlier about me getting a REAL job when I told her that this is what I want to do. Anyways, while sitting in the car out of nowhere my mom was to my brother,

    "Sean....do you know the address to where your sister works?"

    Note to self: HE DID NOT KNOW WHAT I DID BUT MY MOM DOES.

    "Uhm....no?"

    So she keeps blabbing on to him about it while I start to have a panic attack and reacted by trying to call/text people on my phone so she could see that I'm not COMFORTABLE talking about it at that moment.

    "You need to know where she works! California is earthquake central and what happens if something happens to her!"-Mother

    "Uhm.....okay I guess?"-brother

    "DO YOU KNOW WHAT SHE DOES?!?!?"- Mother


    Here we fucking go.


    "She does ADULT STUFF..."--mother

    "I thought she was doing go go dancing?"-brother


    So they start going on about me only doing it wanting to have approval from guys(which that pissed me off!), and my brother started saying that he didn't want to have a sister doing that, I won't get anywhere with it since I'm black (WTF?) , it'll be on my bacround, and that my mom should of kept Jenna Jameson's book away from me (by that point I'm like WOW...).

    Note: ALL OF THIS WAS HAPPENING IN FRONT OF ME AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN DARE TO TALK WITH ME THE WHOLE TIME LIKE I WASN'T EVEN IN THE CAR SO I JUST TOOK IT!

    So at that point I felt like shanking my mom with the sharpest blade in the WORLD since she promised me that she wouldn't go out and tell my brother like that and to have me do it myself.

    I'm STILL pissed about it because I feel like they won't accept the fact that I like what I do! They think that whoever does this is FUCKED UP WHICH IS NOT TRUE!
    If this was coming off of someone else, I wouldn't give a flying fuck but since my oldest brother was like my father figure, I feel like I've disappointed him .

    I'm just REALLY pissed at my mother... like she betrayed me
    I KNOW she did that on purpose because she thought if my brother knew about it then I would maybe back off from it.....wtf again.

    I'M A GROWN FUCKING WOMAN.

    Could anyone give me some support on this topic?
    "Strippers are like pet tigers. They are nice to look at but they are not for everyone."

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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    wow so your mom said you wouldnt get anywhere with dancing becaus your black

    i would have said well mon if thats what you think i wont try getting a normal job because if thats the case i will be screwed over there too! in fact ill give up trying for anything before ive even started!

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    Veteran Member Innocense's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    I obviously don't agree with them. The way your mother betrayed your trust wasn't right but u have to inderstand that stripping has a very bad reputation so is normal for your family to be concerned. However u are a grown up and are allowed to decide what's best for u. My advice is don't get mad but try to be the bigger one by explaining to them ur plans, how ur club works, your purpuse of having this job.
    I know it's easier to say it but remember that even though they're acting in an unreasonable way they're just concerned about you. If u had a sister wouldn't u be concerned if u knew she was a stripper n all u knew about stripping is what u hear about it and what u see in movies?
    Good luck! This is something we all go trough...

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    Featured Member Lady Xplicit18's Avatar
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    Angry Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    Cashing in- my brother said that about me.


    I'm mostly upset about them talking about it but not even wanting to say a word to me about it while I listen to EVERYTHING. If they were really concerned, they would of talked to ME about it; not just between themselves while I'm RIGHT THERE!
    "Strippers are like pet tigers. They are nice to look at but they are not for everyone."

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    Veteran Member Innocense's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    If u're right there they're obviously talking out loud because they want you to hear what they think . They were probably uncfortable with the topic and approaching u inderectly...

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    Member Starting out (Maisy)'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    They did say harsh things, but by them talking to eachother infront of you, I doubt they were trying to embarass you. I think they were just too scared to say it to you, and decided to go about saying what they wanted to say to you, in that way, ya know? I actually saw something on one of the hbo channels like 2 months ago about a famous black stripper. I don't remember who it was, but she's doing very well.

  7. #7
    Senior Member patchouli's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    That sucks. Your family isn't accepting you for who you are and they're extremely disrespectful and misinformed.

    If I were you I'd say fuck off to them and get your own phone, break all connections/responsibilities with your mother, and be the real grown woman you truly are. The longer you are relying on her for anything the longer you'll have to deal with shit like that. I speak from experience.

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    Am I missing something? Why did you not stand up for yourself while all of this was going on?!
    Don't you ever sleep?
    Not at night...that's when the stars have rather better things to do. They're coming out, shining, that sort of thing.
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    Your mother tried to express her opinions to you and when you shot her down she hope to continue expressing her opinion to whomever was in ear shot so that you could hear what she had to say. Essentially she was baiting you to confront her, especially by talking so badly about you and your job to someone you really care about.

    You did the right thing by letting it go right by you at the time and giving the impression that he opinion of your choices has no impact on them. The best thing to do now is broach the subject again when it's just you and her, tell her honestly how you feel about your job. Be sure to tell her how -

    --scuse me, how low and scheming and fucking juvenile it is to go on and on about someone when they are sitting right there, dragging in bystanders for support of her feeble arguments and team up on you. omg! That pisses me off! Kudos for not rising to the bait. I'd have verbally ripped her a new one. Now back to our logical, level headed discussion -

    Be sure to tell her how uncomfortable it made you when she dragged your brother into it. Above all remain calm. Don't shout, don't call names and don't bring up anything else. Make sure you stay on topic. Hopefully she's still "mom" enough to listen to your rational explanations and actually hear you. If not *sigh* table the topic. If she can't hold a reasonable conversation about it, you might as well talk to the chair for all the good it'll do you. Some people are just too damned closed minded and stubborn to ever see what we do as anything other than dirty and evil, something only fucked up little girls do (which is a good speaking point, she raised you right? if there's something wrong with you she has no one to blame for it but herself).

    ~K

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    Featured Member Lady Xplicit18's Avatar
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    Angry Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    My mom knows that my car is in the shop right now so yesterday she called me from her work

    "Hey how are you?"-mother

    "Good."-me

    "We need to figure out how to get you back a regular job"-mother

    "Mom, I've told you that I like my job; I'm not going to quit just because you don't approve of it"

    "So how are you getting to work then if your car's in the shop?"-mother

    "My boyfriend is taking me"

    "Oh...so HE supports you doing this?!"


    UGH! My boyfriend isn't cheering for me but he understands WAY more than my mom even when in the beginning he was the one that didn't want me to do it the most but now he's fine with it. I gotta do what I gotta do. And besides, I could truly say that I like my job. My mother also tried texting me today asking how I was & if I could talk. I truly just feel like there's no talking with her and is going to try & pressure me to get out of dancing. I just want her to leave me alone! :/
    "Strippers are like pet tigers. They are nice to look at but they are not for everyone."

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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    Tell her to just leave you alone then. Sometimes it works.

    ~K

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Ugh....my loud mouth mother!

    ^^^^ Pretty much.

    If there's no talking to her about it than just don't. Whenever she brings it up just tell her you need to get off the phone, need to go, etc. If she complains about that tell her that your job is not up for discussion and you would appreciate it if she minds her own business.
    Don't you ever sleep?
    Not at night...that's when the stars have rather better things to do. They're coming out, shining, that sort of thing.
    - Blog -
    My PM box fills up quick. If you have a question please with your username.
    Congrats to Pryce on doing some much needed tending in his garden!
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