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Thread: Fantasy vs. Reality

  1. #76
    Veteran Member commanderadama's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by mediocrity View Post
    That's pretty harsh, I agree. I'm a size 4, but I'm also close to 5 foot 9. Am I borderline "hideous"?
    Too me yes, but I'm sure many other men would find you attractive. In strip club you'd have zero chance at my cash as my already insane standards get down right absurd in a strip club.

    It's a sport for my friends female and male alike to figure out if there is any women in the room that I'm attracted too. My therapist said "You're like attracted to about 1% of the females in any given area" to which I replied, "that seems a little high".

  2. #77
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    ^ Let's leave it at that. This attractive vs. not-attractive discussion belongs in another thread, and will likely only result in everyone being pissed off. So let's drop it here.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    ^ Let's leave it at that. This attractive vs. not-attractive discussion belongs in another thread, and will likely only result in everyone being pissed off. So let's drop it here.
    Agreed, but man. I usually reserve the word hideous for the horribly disfigured.

    Let's hope our friend up there is equally attractive to mutually attract these magic girls.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by commanderadama View Post
    For me it's a mini-date that includes feeling her up and ends with a hug and a peck on the cheek.
    Why not find one you like, spend a few times with her, then see about getting a real date. Then your fantasy will be a reality and you will get more then a mini date.

    <flame suit on>
    Quote Originally Posted by The Snark View Post
    But then I suppose the sort of people who write this kind of crap generally don't allow their opinions to be tainted by things like "facts" and "reality".
    Distortion becomes somehow pure in its wildness
    The note that began all can also destroy

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    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by commanderadama View Post
    Too me yes, but I'm sure many other men would find you attractive. In strip club you'd have zero chance at my cash as my already insane standards get down right absurd in a strip club.

    It's a sport for my friends female and male alike to figure out if there is any women in the room that I'm attracted too. My therapist said "You're like attracted to about 1% of the females in any given area" to which I replied, "that seems a little high".
    All your posts prove is that you're worse than asshole, so I'm not surprised that you're being called one bc frankly, you deserve to be called way worse than that.

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  7. #81
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Could we get this thread back on track please? Invectives don't do anything but piss people off.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    I'm sorry madam, I've been naughty.

    Why does it have to be reality vs. fantasy? The people in a SC are there to do a job, and we (customers) are there to let them do that job. Why care why the other is there. Why complicate things.
    Quote Originally Posted by The Snark View Post
    But then I suppose the sort of people who write this kind of crap generally don't allow their opinions to be tainted by things like "facts" and "reality".
    Distortion becomes somehow pure in its wildness
    The note that began all can also destroy

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by Elvia View Post
    ^^^Being above a size 4 hardly qualifies as "overweight." People can be fit and in good shape and still come in a variety of shapes and sizes.
    I agree. I don't even know what a size 2 or 4 is, to speak the truth, because I've never asked a woman about their size. I like dancers who are thin, but medium is okay if she is very pretty, has nice big boobs and a nice personality. I don't like extra-thin anorexic dancers nor dancers with noticeable round bellies.

    Again, the SC is about fantasy... not about fairness, political correctness, etc... Men fantasize about thin woman with a FLAT hardbelly. Blame it on Playboy bunnies, Victoria Secrets Models, Swimsuit models, etc... So, if a woman gets into this game, she should join a gym and keep her stomach flat and firm.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    I agree. I don't even know what a size 2 or 4 is, to speak the truth, because I've never asked a woman about their size. I like dancers who are thin, but medium is okay if she is very pretty, has nice big boobs and a nice personality. I don't like extra-thin anorexic dancers nor dancers with noticeable round bellies.

    Again, the SC is about fantasy... not about fairness, political correctness, etc... Men fantasize about thin woman with a FLAT hardbelly. Blame it on Playboy bunnies, Victoria Secrets Models, Swimsuit models, etc... So, if a woman gets into this game, she should join a gym and keep her stomach flat and firm.
    Oops, sorry Charlie... Just saw your post about getting back on track...

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    Featured Member Naida's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Here's a situation for you-
    You're a guy who's not in the best of shape and who isn't the best looking, but happens to have extra cash to blow and you decide to do so in the club. A gorgeous, barely-legal young woman comes up to you and asks if you'd like a dance, during which she smiles and rubs her breasts in your face while hanging on your every word.

    Yes, you really do have a cute, naked girl in your lap that (depending on which club you're in) is letting you touch her ass and appears to be attracted to you. But that is not the REALITY of the matter.

    The fantasy is that she's attracted to you and enjoys being this close to you.
    The reality is that she's really thinking- "Jeezus, this guy is fucking disgusting. I wish he would get his grubby hands off my butt. Smile a little wider, the song is almost over and I want that extra 20 so I can get the fuck out of here and get the smell of his gross cologne off of me!"

    If you are there for the reality of seeing and, maybe, touching T&A, then you're in luck- you're getting reality.
    If you are there because you enjoy the company and attention of <insert stripper's name> as well as her body, you are only recieving fantasy.
    Exotic dancing is like any other job.
    If you work in an office, you wear dress shoes and a suit.
    If you work in a restaraunt, you wear skid resistant shoes and a uniform.
    If you work in a strip club, you wear 7" stilettos and lycra g-strings.

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  13. #86
    Veteran Member commanderadama's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by glambman View Post
    Why not find one you like, spend a few times with her, then see about getting a real date. Then your fantasy will be a reality and you will get more then a mini date.

    <flame suit on>
    Hahaha. Real Girlfriends, like children, are an avoidable liability. I prefer renting.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by Naida View Post
    If you are there for the reality of seeing and, maybe, touching T&A, then you're in luck- you're getting reality.
    If you are there because you enjoy the company and attention of <insert stripper's name> as well as her body, you are only recieving fantasy.
    This goes back to the physical (real) v. emotional (fantasy) aspects of the interation that Charlie and I mentioned...

    My point is it: the two cannot be separated... We all wish we had some on-and-off switch with the power to suspend our emotions, but that just doesn't happen... Maybe alcohol dulls the emotions a little, but they're still there... We NEED the emotional fantasy to be joined to the reality of the situation...

    From the custie's standpoint, there are two alternative emotions with two corresponding fantasies:

    (1) Attraction: This emotion leads the guy to fantasize that the dancer is the hottest babe in the planet, she is a nymphomaniac and she is all into HIM...

    (2) Contempt: This emotion (which could be caused by the custie feeling rejection or scorn from the dancers or from women in general) causes the custie to fantasize that he is a pimp and the dancer is his ho. In that case, he enjoys the pleasure of domination and cares little about whether the dancer genuinely likes him or not.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by commanderadama View Post
    Hahaha. Real Girlfriends, like children, are an avoidable liability. I prefer renting.
    lol I mean a real date in the dancer-SC/ Custie OTC sense, not a mini date ITC sense. Leasing is good. No long term terms here.
    Quote Originally Posted by The Snark View Post
    But then I suppose the sort of people who write this kind of crap generally don't allow their opinions to be tainted by things like "facts" and "reality".
    Distortion becomes somehow pure in its wildness
    The note that began all can also destroy

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    (2) Contempt: This emotion (which could be caused by the custie feeling rejection or scorn from the dancers or from women in general) causes the custie to fantasize that he is a pimp and the dancer is his ho. In that case, he enjoys the pleasure of domination and cares little about whether the dancer genuinely likes him or not.
    (3) Freedom -- very similar to 2 but without the contempt. I spent waaaayyyyyy too much of my life, IRL, paralyzed by what other people might think of me. I was extremely shy in male-female relationships, wasting all my good years when I should have been getting laid a lot more than I did.

    And now in the club, it is the absolute freedom to know that doesn't matter at all. As long as you're not an asshole (and I'm not, despite other posts in this thread lol) and spend a minimum amount of money, you're accepted...that's what the club is there for. So it matters to me ZERO what dancers "really" think of me. I want the physical reality, and a pleasant time (whether they're faking it or not), and that's real enough for me. I suspect that the relaxation this freedom brings makes me more interesting to be around, too, but only once has it resulted in being more than a customer. That's once more than most, though.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by Everyman View Post
    Look, the only reason I started this thread was because I tired of hearing "remember it's a fantasy...you're paying for a fantasy" over and over again. I've never felt like that for a second; a hot naked 20-year-old in my lap is as real as it gets. I think dancers, much more than customers, cling to this fantasy/reality distinction to help themselves deal psychologically with what they do ("what I do in the club isn't 'real' and isn't the 'real me').
    I have to agree with this. I would totally dissociate when I was working. For instance, maybe a loved one died shortly before I had to go to work. By the time I hit the floor, I was all smiles and acting horny to get the dances. When the hair and makeup came off at home, I'd fall apart emotionally. Male dancers do this too, so it isn't limited to women only. I believe this is common to anyone who spends a lot of time in the public eye: dancers, actors, politicians or school teachers, soldiers, doctors, police officers, slaughter house employees and prison guards need to compartmentalize as well, to be successful. Those who can't wash out pretty quickly.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


  19. #91
    Veteran Member commanderadama's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by glambman View Post
    lol I mean a real date in the dancer-SC/ Custie OTC sense, not a mini date ITC sense. Leasing is good. No long term terms here.
    Did that 10 years ago, I don't like drama. Take a look at the life support thread, it's pretty typical. I did really like a couple I hung out with, but one had two kids (I don't like kids) and the other had a serious gambling problem (I actually "dated" her and she turned me on to Montreal. In that city I'm attracted to 20% of the female population, it's awesome!) And as far as women go, I have to say strippers are my favorite. They can stay up past midnight & like to dance (I love Hed Kandi). They can walk several miles in comfortable shoes with no complaining... Are worldly, especially the Canadian ones, fascinatingly intelligent, if not educated. In a word impressive...

    But the thing about women selling fantasy and my problem with this thread is that perception IS reality. And ALL women are selling a fantasy to one degree or another, every single last one of them. What dude would have signed up for a fat pig wife and two or three bratty kids? It just amazes me what too many men put up with. And strippers wonder why married men come to strip clubs? Because they HATE their families and cannot escape from them do to punitive laws. So if you're a middle class guy making 40 to 90K per year, it's cheaper to keep her and go to strip clubs.

    Example fantasy: One women I had known for 8 years decided she wanted me. She had been a size 8 to 10 the entire time I knew her thus not even on my radar, then she breaks up with her boyfriend, shows up at my door 6 months later in a size 4 sundress (I love sundresses, she knew this). We had a summer fling. Then she wanted to know "where the relationship was going" granted she had a child so it was a legitimate concern but hell "I don't know it's been like 3 months." I'm like going back up to your previous size is not an option, you wanna ride the commander it's 4 or less baby. LOL BJ's are required and the drama must be light.

    Since she was selling a total fantasy we didn't get married. Besides I would have put my requirements in a prenup, laws are too biased to the women folk nowadays a man needs to protect his assets. I know a dude who actually adopted his wife's children, he now pays child support on kids her didn't father.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    "Pay No Attention to the Dancer Behind the Curtain."

    Sometimes it is done with smoke and mirrors. (I saw it.)
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post

    The SC is the only place where you bypass all that and see a live naked girl without putting on any effort at all. At some point in the future, when you have a REAL girlfriend or wife, you will nostalgically look back at the SC as a wonderful place of pure fantasy...
    "Date" OTC not the pure escort "date" but the true OTC relationship "date" and one can have the worse of both worlds.

    Pl's and strippers are just opposite sides of the same coin and we deserve each other.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by Everyman View Post


    And, if you think most SC customers (present company included) can get a hot 20-y/o as a wife or girlfriend OTC, I have a nice piece of swampland to sell you in Florida.
    I just spent two days with a 19 yo "girlfriend" OTC. I shudder to think of her as my next wife. I shudder to think of any women as my next wife. Yes I am generous and yes we swapped body fluids.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    Then don't be offended when they tell you you're an asshole. If they don't see you spending all you're doing is taking up their time and space.
    Strippers will think a PL is an assholes if he does not tip; they will think he is an asshole if he spends his entire pay check on them.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post

    I think what the dancers are saying in this forum is, "PLEASE DON'T KISS THE ACTORS."
    How about for a tip? I got tongue from the most beautiful women I ever saw for $20.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by commanderadama View Post
    Hmm, so you're saying that this "wanna dance" technique actually is productive? In the clubs I frequent the dancers doing it seem desperate and don't take no well.
    I don't do LD but I always tip the girl a few dollars for her time when I say no. You must realize that dancers take this business personal. I wish more dancers would realize that PLs take this business personal.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    The fantasy... and please ladies, don't regard me as a misogynist for saying this, because I'm not, and I'm sure you women have your LONG lists, too... is that you have a beautiful young woman dancing before you, pealing off her clothes, brushing her amazing tits on your face, grinding her lovely ass on your... and treating you like the hottest piece of male ass around... without all the drama and bullshit that comes with being in a REAL relationship... She is not going to make you wait until after several dates to see her naked (and there's never a guarantee)... She is not going to tell you that she is not in the mood tonight because she has a migraine, is upset about something somebody did or said, or didn't like the way she looked in that tight little black dress she tried on at the store (and this can happen several nights consecutively)... She is not going to ask you to spend an entire evening visiting her lame parents and/or friends... She is not going to ask you to spend hours fixing something that you end up making worst (and have to hire a professional because YOU broke it) or to give up an entire day doing something she likes to do and you hate -- like shopping... You will not have to rack your brain thinking of "romantic" things to say to her all the time and hearing about how romantic her best friend's boyfreind is... and being compare to him all the time... You will not have to spend a big portion of your paycheck on fancy restaurants and taking her out to see expensive Broadway plays (when the movie version is so much better), etc... She is not going to pressure you about the direction that the relationship is heading... She is not going to judge you on your morals, religion, politics, work, etc... She is not going to call you lazy or a slob (even though she's correct in that assessment)... She is not going to criticize your friends and family... She is not going to ask you to take out the garbage, clean out the garage, etc... She is not going to ask you why you're looking at other women in the club or why you came home so late last night, etc...

    Really, modern day relationships are very complex and even exhausting for BOTH parties involved... There is so much work-related pressure already and when you add to that the drama and complexity of relationship issues... It's no wonder that only half of marriages succeed beyond 2 years... When I go to the SC the "fantasy" is an instant hot girlfriend experience with lovely tits on my face and hot ass on my lap... The fantasy is summarized as this: 100% attraction, 100% sexual arousal, 0% drama and 0% complexity.
    there's always a tradeoff; the stripclub relationship is like this: money=honey; no money=no more honey

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    The SC is the only place where you bypass all that and see a live naked girl without putting on any effort at all. At some point in the future, when you have a REAL girlfriend or wife, you will nostalgically look back at the SC as a wonderful place of pure fantasy...
    Share the fantasy; avoid the nightmare; pay for the reality.

    You will need to put in some effort to do this.

    First make youself presentable, like you are going on a date (take a shower, change your shorts&socks, put on deordorant, shave, brush teeth, get out clean clothes, etc)

    Second, have an attitude of fun for you and for the stripper. And if she's having a bad night (not from dealing with you), try to help lighten and liven. Don't stress her out by trying to force her beyond her limits; don't test but ask first. If she really likes you (happens maybe 1% of the time), she will let you know what may happen. Don't you ask.

    Third, help her out more than you help out the club, money-wise. Her real fantasy is accumulating more money than she pays out each week jus to work and pay bills.

    That's YOUR work. Have a fantastic time.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: Fantasy vs. Reality

    The Fantasy is the environment that is has been created for your enjoyment. Yes there are bodies and smiles and aromas but...it's has been designed to provoke and excite you. This is a dream world. Where else, organically, can you sit in a chair and have the most beautiful women you have ever seen fawn over you? This does not happen in your everyday life, at home or at work. Ok it is Hugh Hefs life. But for everyone else this is a Fantasy. It's like Disneyland. There is nothing natural or organic about it.

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