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Last edited by Averyxo; 12-12-2010 at 08:18 PM.


It's weird I've gone through the exact same thing. I tend to envy girls with big butts and big hips. I am really tiny 5'0 100lbs. I learned that while you admire someone else's beauty someone else is admiring you. The same girls with the big booties would say how do you stay so skinny ? I wish I was that skinny. And I'd be thinking I wish my butt was bigger. I just learned to focus on myself. And I started making a lot more money hope this helps.





That's really true Britney- we always want what we don't have!
Avery I think a certain amount of adoration and respect is ok just don't allow yourself to become envious. In any career firld there's always someone getting picked for a promtion ahead of you or seems to get things accomplished with ease, it's life! I'm sure that there's alot of customers who prefer you over Miss Perfect anyday!
XoXo Gia
Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"



There is one girl that I'm slightly envious of only she is cracked out and offers extras in the VIP. The only reason I'm envious is because she gets more dances then me. I'm highly competitive at work and always make it a goal to make the most dances of the night (my club marks them to keep track of how many dances each girl makes). She's the only one that is in tight competition with me and it's rather frustrating.
I'm not jealous of how she looks because my body is way better. I don't let it get me down, if anything, it makes me work harder.
Usually I'm just jealous of bits and pieces of girls. I've never met a girl that I'm completely jealous of.
Last edited by NREXM; 05-18-2009 at 01:37 PM.




I agree with Britney. I used to be really envious of tall girls, I've always thought they were gorgeous, and have such long legs, and to me at least, a tall woman looks confident and powerful. It's sexy.
While I get labeled "cute" and have a hell of a time getting people to take me seriously, what with my tiny little hands, and tiny little feet, and my squeaky little voice, ugh!
I remember one night I was having a few drinks with this woman who is just gorgeous. She's 6 feet tall and looks like a model. The conversation somehow got to me saying how I've always been kind of intimidated by tall women, and I wish I was taller. She responded "Are you kidding me?!? I used to slouch all the time until I was in my 30's to look shorter. I never felt feminine, especially when I would stand next to someone like you, I felt like a big, awkward man."
I was flabbergasted. I couldn't even imagine someone like her being insecure about their looks. I still get jealous of other people sometimes, but I try to keep in mind that everybody has moments like that.
When I started I loved a girl named Samantha. She was so classy and pretty. I slowly over the years morphed into my idea of perfect (which was her-ish). It helps that we already looked a lot alike - I just needed to get a bit more stripperfied.
But yea, it's totally normal to feel how you feel. Im sure we've all been there at one time or another.



There are some girls I've worked with who I considered absolutely drop dead goregous, and I've loved working with them because I just like looking at pretty girls and I like having hot chicks at work with me because I feel like it makes the club better and more men are likely to come back and bring their friends if the women are attractive, but I've never really been envious of them or in awe of them either. I just know that while they might be the pinnacle of physical beauty, that it takes more than beauty to be a good dancer. Sure, it helps, but there are tons of beautiful girls at my work that make WAYY less than me because they don't know how to really "work".
In fact, I've found that the girls that make the most money are the most average looking ones (myself included). We know how to hustle and we're pretty ENOUGH that we make money. So while I sometimes wish I had "those hips" or "those tits", I'm happy enough to settle for just looking at them instead and just enjoying them in another person's context.
In terms of girls intimidating me at work though, they are usually the ones that hustle hard. I HATE working with good hustlers because, well, then I HAVE to hustle harder too and I usually make less because they are taking part of the money walking in. I get intimidated sometimes by good hustlers because while I'm a good one myself (or can be) I like to be a little lazy now and again, and I can't be when there are other good ones in the house. Plus, I always compare myself to them and I always make competitions in my head and if I see them doing a dance, then I feel I need to be doing a dance, and I keep a mental tally of me vs. them in terms of dances, and I psych myself out and mostly fail to keep up.
It's a good thing that the club I'm at now only has a few good hustlers, lol. Because I hate working with them! I have to work twice as hard for half the money when they show up and there isn't anything I know of to do to change that.



I still remember the girl that made me feel like that, she was awesome, actually she wanted me to room with her when I said I was leaving for home. She was just perfect and 100% natural.
Nice boobs, nice ass, nice legs and the cutest blonde flip bob. I hated her, yet loved her.
If I was a lesbian I would of eaten her alive LOL.
When I would get intimidated by another girl it would get me so messed up... first I would be intimidated and sure the customers would like her better... then it became a self fulfilling prophecy. She was going about her business as usual while I was a nuerotic mess inside. And you know what? Customers can tell! Of course, they couldn't tell specifically that I was envious of her, but they could tell that she was confident while I was insecure. And so then my money went down and then I felt worse... the whole thing was a downward spiral.
But I figured out how to break the pattern. When someone would intimidate me with her hotness, I would look around... there were other women there that I didn't think were hot, but plenty of customers did. It reminded me that my ideal was not everyone else's ideal and variety is the spice of life. So while she may be my definition of HOT, I was someone else's definition of hot, and it takes all kinds in a club. If we all looked one way, they wouldn't want to see us... it's our differences that make it an intersting place to be. And no matter how bad we think our butt is, some customer thinks it is just right.
Then, I would remind myself that I WANT to work with the prettiest girls possible. If the other girls were all uglier than me, customers wouldn't stay for long. The other night I was in Scores and saw 3 unattractive dancers... for $14 a shot! I left and went to Penthouse... shots were the same price, but the scenery was a lot better. The more attractive the group of girls is, the longer they stay, the more they spend, and the more likely they are to come back. Working with really hot girls was better for my money immediately and long term.
And another poster mentioned something I also did... I emulated those women. I have a natural beauty that was ready to get out... I just had to "stripperfy" (as she said) and seeing what I like helped me do that in a way that represented me. I loved the way that one arched her back, and the classier outfits of another one, and the way that girl moved, etc.... they came together to make ME! And when that happened, I was one of the intimidating girls, and other girls watched me with that look of fascination/lust/envy that I used to know so well.
Everyone has different tastes. If they didn't, all strip clubs would be full of skinny tanned blondes with huge fake tits and no brains.
Not to diss the skinny blondes...I'm a skinny blonde, but my tits are real, and I'm pretty damn smart
But I work at an upstate NY club, which is full of Italian chicks...so lots of brunettes with olive or tan skin. And there's a lot of guys who absolutely want that Bitchy Italian Princess thing, which is SO not me.
Plus, you have to realize that looks are not everything...I'd guess they're probably even less than half. Not to be arrogant, but including me, there's a handful of girls at my club who definitely rate 9-10, but a lot of the time, the girls closer to 6-7 are taking home twice or three times what we do.
A lot of guys (especially the younger beta ones) are just as intimidated by 9's and 10's in a strip club as they are in the real world. They're afraid we'll reject them, even though that totally goes against the job description. So they might moon and sigh over us from a distance, but they'll probably disappear in the back with an average or below-average girl.
The older guys, younger alpha guys, and more experienced strip-club custies, seem to not have that problem, at least to me. I don't know, maybe that's a regional thing.
^ Though a big point you're missing in your post is that the "9-10" range is completely subjective. You might consider yourself a 9-10, but to someone else, you may be one of those "6-7's". Don't mean to sound bitchy, but it sounded a bit cocky of you to place yourself amongst the top tier when the whole rating system is whacked.
What you see as a 6 is someone else's 10. It doesn't mean she's actually less attractive than you are just because you perceive her as being such.
Just get over it! Let it go. There's someone out there who makes her feel the same way. There are a lot of these girls in the business who are really hot, but there's something they lack that makes them not good enough for other businesses (not tall or thin or young enough to be a model, not funny enough to be a comedian, not talented enough to be an actress, etc). This is why she's a top tier stripper and not a bottom shelf model!
You should never compare yourself to others in work, because you're always hotter than someone else and less hot than someone else - the same is true of everyone.
When she's busy, she's out of sight to the other customers so you can take their money!
Last edited by ViolaStrings; 05-20-2009 at 11:18 AM.
I know how you feel. When I first started dancing, I worked with a girl named Sadie, she was tall slender and sensual and could work the pole and the floor, was always doing dances... I hated going up after her.. I was short, athletic, couldn't dance worth a flip... Or so I thought... Some guys liked her, some guys liked me....
But like everyone else said I started to pick up things from each girl that I liked and made my own style, and with that gained my self-confidence... I may not be the best looking or the best dancer or the best hustler, but I walk on that stage with the mindset that I own it, and thats when I do my best....
"I've hit rock bottom before but I've climbed outta that hole and planted daisy's on top of it. I forget to water them sometimes but I manage."
"I can be a bitch. I like to be a bitch sometimes. People leave you alone when you are."



For a minute I thought you and I worked at the same club. In my eight years of dancing, I've only come across two girls that I believed were perfect from top to bottom. But when a customer said something negative about the first girl I believed to be perfect, I was absolutely shocked. He thought my butt looked better than her's and that she had the butt if a 12-year-old. I later learned that this perfectly beautiful petite woman made money by giving dirty dances.
As for the next perfect beauty, not all guys are attracted to women with her hair color. She's been dancing for a long time so I think she just knows how to hustle. I swear she gets into VIP every single night. The one time I had a conversation with her, I was shocked when she said that she was having a bad night. I was also having a bad night and I couldn't understand why one particular unappealing girl didn't seem to have difficulty getting lap dances.
It's normal for everyone of us to feel jealousy every now and then. We're all different and we tend to like what we don't have. I think you should just focus on yourself and be thankful for what you have Averyxo... because to be honest you are really beautifulYou have a gorgeous face.
Here's something that happened to me a couple of months ago which I thought was very cool...
This new girl was like a perfect 10 to me. I swear if you take a picture of her and I don't know her I'd bet my ass the picture retouched. I mean, I couldn't believe she was for real, she was perfect!!! tall, very slim thin body but with really nice curves and the most beautiful natural boobies e.v.e.r. I saw her on stage and I swear I was drooling! Anyways... a couple of hours later we ran a special at the club and she's the first one on line and I'm right behind her. She goes and asks this guy if he wants a dance and he says no, I'm thinking "well, if he rejected her then it's OBVIOUS he's broke...why else wouldn't he get a dance with her????" so i ignore him and go on to the next customer but HE stands up and follows ME and asks me for a dance and he got like 20 dances with me and the whole time he was telling just how beautiful I was and how much he liked my body.... My mind kinda exploded a couple of times that night....
Oh, and also...if she's getting so many dances then it's probably because she's actually a nice person like you said because no one likes getting dances with some one who has a bad attitude even if she's a perfect 10...
Everyone's going to feel that way at one time or another. I had a student that won several dancing contests in the area and worked in a few of the clubs for a short while. She made $500 on average a night, gorgous body, hot hair that she didn't have to do anything to, and super cute face. I idolized her, and hated myself for being a clunky 5'9" girl with big thighs, frizzy hair... you name it.
Then one class she came in looking like she was about to burst into tears. Come to find out, she has severe social anxiety, and pretty much can't look at herself in the mirror. The reason she had such a hot body was because she hated herself and made herself work out to the point of collapsing.
It was that day that I realised that I just need to be happy with who I am, and grateful that while I lust after a better shape and image... I'm not crippled by my own critisims.
amandelicious; sweet, fine but vicious
Im busting out my cockyness VS! lol.... I know I'm one of the better looking girls at my club but would get turned down by the younger crowd... I went back to work this past weekend with my fantastic braces and I swear they knocked me down a notch - now Im now more "normal" and they have something they can relate to with me "Hey! I had braces!" ... I didn't get one no over Fri and Sat night.... so being average is definitely better than being one of the top tier in my new opinion. lol





Thank god other people had idols at work too, I had one when I first started and thought I was a weirdo, glad to know this was part of growing up as a dancer.
xoxo
That's not always true. It doesn't necessarily mean they are worthless in their profession. A lot of great models and actresses often get screwed with their pay, sometimes having to wait 3 months, 6 months, sometimes even a year for one job's pay, all while booking other jobs that might take a while to pay, and a girl just can't securely live like that all the time unless she timely receives at least a year's worth of expenses plus saving money to hold her over until the next booking or check, depending on the situation and how much money each type of job pays. Can you even begin to imagine waiting so long to get paid and wondering when the next job will ever come? The client sometimes takes a ridiculously long time to pay the agency, which then in turn gets their cut and eventually pays the model. It isn't easy nor common for one girl to book most of the jobs either. It is usually legal for them to take long with paying the actress or model, if at all in some cases, and it's the nature of the business. There is less assurance that you will get work in the businesses, no matter how beautiful or talented she is, no matter how good the agency is. Just look at the celebrity magazines with not-so-fantastic looking or talented people in it who are successful anyway. It really does carry an element of luck with it. The fashion and show businesses are not as cut-and-dry as some might think. My friends and I know it firsthand, as we have been involved in several areas of the industries.
At least with dancing you know when the next time you'll go back to work and know, generally, that you'll make at least some money that day or week.
There are models who would rather dance to sustain themselves than sleep with a photographer or director to hopefully get the job. There have been even male models who get intimate with photographers for big ads like Abercrombie and Fitch. There's no guarantee, however.
Also, there are models and actresses that downright feel they can make great side money for a chunk of downtime with their looks and acting skills while dancing, which certainly can help. It can be a fun game for some, more than a means to get by. There's even been girls who dance for a short time just to get over their stage fright. Dancing can certainly be character-building.
There are so many variables, that it would be short-sighted to limit oneself to just one explanation why these girls dance.
Last edited by CherryLollie2; 05-22-2009 at 02:33 PM. Reason: addition




there have been many times when i have felt intimidated, only to find out later that the girl who intimidated me was intimidated by me. a lot of times i feel better though, knowing that a lot of the really gorgeous girls are extremely lazy and/or try to get by only on their looks. so in a way a girl that is there to work hard is a bigger threat.
on a semi related note, have any of you had your confidence ruined because of your coworkers going on and on about a particular girl or girls? i mean people like dj's, managers, bouncers, not other girls. cause seriously after hearing them talk about some of the girls i often feel completely like shit.

This same thing happened to me too! And it was a girl who I thought no one EVER would say no to. I felt awesome too.
After dancing for a few years I can appreciate beauty in so many different ways. I have my type and girls I would consider a 10, are definately not what some of my customers would consider a 10.





i'm intimidated by a few girls at my work... one of them is just really gorgeous (but def an extra girl) one is an amazing dancer and the other is just really cute and always wears the BEST outfits.
the first girl i dont really know but the other two ive gotten to know a bit and arent as intimidated by them anymore-- theyre both insecure and intimidated by other girls there. the third girl helped me put some outfits together and the second has been teaching me pole moves (ive been dancing less than a week). and the first girl is just a bitch. haha.
so much of the persona you put out is bullshit... when im walking up to a guy and talking him up for a dance im amazed how confident i can make myself sound when im actually terrified of getting rejected.





Wow, my very first thread!
How cute.
and still....every club has that "one girl"...![]()





lol Avery, I bumped into my striper idol a few months ago not at work but out, she rememberd me and called me by the name I used to go by, Im happy she rememberd me 6yrs lata lol.
xoxo




There is this girl I work with, who I thought was my idea of perfection, she was skinny and toned with nice implants that were perfect looking. she had a pretty face too. I felt competitive with her because I had the same body as her but her legs were 1-2 inches longer than mine. Also our faces was on the same level. It was that extra 1-2 inches of leg that made me insecure. Well this year she gained like 15-20 lbs and I am no longer jealous. Haha. Also she got her boobs redone and they are uglier so doubly no longer jealous. I guess now there is no one at my club that I feel competitive with. Don't feel bad if there is a girl out there that seems "perfect", all of that stuff fades with time. The body is just a shell anyways.
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