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Thread: Did I handle this okay?

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    Member kokoro's Avatar
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    Default Did I handle this okay?

    I realized I posted in General instead of Newbie for my first nights, sorry!

    Anyway, my first night was Thursday. It was EXTREMELY slow, partially because there's road construction and our power went out the first two hours that the club was open! About 45 minutes before closing, no one new was coming in, all the guys that were there were occupied, so I ended up chatting with some random guy who, at first, seemed pretty normal.

    Basically, the gist of it was, I think the guy was on something other than alcohol. He started acting a little weird in the conversation, sometimes zoning out, other times making weird, mocking laughs in response to me, "accidentally" grabbing me/brushing up against me. He spent at least 20 minutes trying to convince me to go with him. At first it was "just to hang out," then it became "Money's not the question, I have tons of money" but he refused to get a dance. The club is pretty small, so it's not like I could go to the other side, because there weren't any customers to talk to!

    So, finally I pretended I was going to call my imaginary girlfriend, and I ran to the bouncer and said, "Hey, there's a guy who's making me feel really uncomfortable and he's propositioning me. Since it's 15 minutes before closing, can I go hide in the dressing room?" Before I could even finish speaking, two bouncers perked up and demanded, "Which one is he?? Point him out! He doesn't have to see your face!" I kinda stepped within viewing distance, pointed out the guy, and he totally saw me. I jumped into the elevator and stayed upstairs until the club was closed.

    Now, I remember reading advice when dealing with people who don't want dances/who proposition, to string them along and get dances (then of course, blow them off at the end of the night and refuse to go home with them!), which is what one of the girls told me in the dressing room, after it happened. I told her that was a good idea, but I had been nervous, I couldn't really think straight about what to do.

    I could have been totally wrong about the situation. Maybe he was just a weird drunk, maybe he was genuine, I don't know. But I did NOT feel comfortable with this dude, who was increasingly getting more persistent and attempting to be touchy.

    As far as I know, that guy won't be back for "another year," as he said. He was leaving the next day to go back home. But ughh, it was weird and I was totally creeped out by him.

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    Featured Member Winged Dinghy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    Listen to your instincts. This guy was a creep who did not deserve your company for 20 minutes. If something like that happens again, WALK AWAY. You don't have to let the weirdo down easy by calling an imaginary girlfriend. You can and you SHOULD listen to yourself when you feel you need to get out of an uncomfortable situation. You do not have to ask for permission to hide in the dressing room. Just go.

    And, it's nice that the bouncers have your back, but just remember, we are independent contractors, not employees of the club. We set our own rules and boundaries. Don't let anybody take advantage of you!

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    Just report him. If he's trying to proposition you he's not a potential lap dance customer.
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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    You actually handled that situation much more politely than you had to. Go with your instincts more quickly in the future. You'll get better at screening out the creepers.

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    Member kokoro's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    I'm actually not sure what our status is at the club, regarding contractors.. we get paid by the hour, but I think for only three hours.. it works out weird for tax purposes. Either way, I agree, I definitely shouldn't have even thought about asking permission to run away!

    The bouncers I've met are super nice, though, and they are very, very strict regarding club rules and whatnot. Such as, they take everyone's car keys and lock them up so no one drives home drunk, and by policy, they will walk you to your car until you are in front of it. Heck, my boyfriend picked me up after my first night, and was no less than 30 feet away, yet the bouncer did not turn away until I was within physical dry-humping distance of the car. Anyway, I digress. Those guys are cool, and they swooped in when help was needed. I totally feel safe where I work, and the guys are very respectful.

    The thing I worry about is that I really like people. I've always worked in environments where I can be with people and make connections. Friday night was a fun night for me, because the guys I gave dances to were all people I were having genuinely good conversations with. One guy was where I made more than half of my money. All we talked about were languages and related stuff (in the midst of his drunken flirtations with me and the nakedness of lap dances!) and I seriously had so much fun. I guess I thought I could have had that enjoyable of a time with creepy guy, and I'm afraid I could miss out on a potentially good night of work/lots of lap dances if I blow someone off too soon.

    Oh well, I guess I will learn the more I work. I definitely want to be nice to people, but I also want to make the moolah! I suppose this is all part of getting used to this new job..

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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    Quote Originally Posted by kokoro View Post
    yet the bouncer did not turn away until I was within physical dry-humping distance of the car.

    what i am saying really has nothing to do with your post, but i seriously fell off my chair when i read this.

    that is the greatest unit of measurement i've ever heard of. LOL!!

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    Member kokoro's Avatar
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    Default Re: Did I handle this okay?

    Hehehehehe

    It's true, though! Maybe I was still in the dancing mindset.. hope my car wasn't too turned on

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