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Thread: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    i get along really well with pretty much every dancer/dj/bouncer at my club. we're a slow club and there aren't a ton of customers but i like it because i enjoy going there and being around the people... i work at one other club but i hate going there because the managers are sleazy and the girls are all really bitchy/clicky.

    they've fired a bunch of people in the past week because they just put $$$$ into advertising. i know my job is safe but a lot of the girls i was friends with got fired. they hired a bunch of new girls in the past couple days and i really dont like them. they're bitchy, steal customers, will talk to a guy for 25 minutes even if he's the ONLY guy in the club and everyone else is waiting for a chance. they're constantly bragging about blank and blank, talking shit about other girls. they're also all really gorgeous, good dancers, and have been stripping for a lot longer than i have.

    ive tried not to let it bother me and last night none of them were on and i did awesome and got my most dances and felt at home/in my game again. but tonight they were all there (theres 3, my club is small we never have more than 20 girls on weekends, usually like 12) and i just felt intimidated and ugly and shy... i didn't get any dances, sell any drinks, and no one was stage tipping, first night i didnt make a $.

    i know everyone just says "don't think about it, just ignore them" but i can't and it's really throwing me off. i feel so insecure now that i know its obvious and the vibe is rubbing off on customer and costing me money. does anyone have good advice on tricks to to up your confidence and stop feeling so intimidated?

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    Senior Member blueyedmiss18's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    i know exactly where your comign from i went through the same thing but flipped i was the new girl intimidated by bitchy clicky dancers that were already there... some night it has definitly effected my money and my mood but now ive realized i cant keep going like that.... when im on stage or on the floor i look past them if they talk to me i look right through them...

    you said they are new but have been dancing longer than you right? who cares youve been at that club longer and shouldnt let any dancer intimidate you especially new girls coming in...

    its easier for me when i think of it like this... i dont have see any of these bitches outside of work and im not going to waste my time thinking about or being concerned over them either.... it kind of pushed me to hustle harder because they used to piss me off i would sit in the corner and bitch about how they are getting dances and im not

    now when they are there its like a competition i see one of them getting a dance and i push harder for dances...i do things on stage i know they cant do and set myself apart ive learned to walk around like my shit doesnt stink but still in a nice way

    just remember always keep your head up gorgeous because stank bitches would kill to see you fall...

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    Featured Member Jezzebelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    If you dont have your game face on and secure before you leave the house, I find its hard to get once in the club. Start remembering why you are great at your job while you are getting ready. Play your most confidence boosting music in the car while you travel there. Strut into the dressing room with quiet confidence, dont even look at the annoying 3 b/c you are too busy with your stuff to even notice they are there.

    Smile at customers when you are walking around the club,let these girls see how happy you are at being there. Out psych them. I bet you can do it. You just gotta forget whats gone before, start afresh with knew knowledge and have a good time making money.
    A civilian spends money to look good
    A stripper looks good to make money
    A civilian may be after your wage
    A stripper laughs at your wage

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    Featured Member Nakita Kash's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    confidence, confidence, confidence!!!!!

    You need to find this within yourself! Sit down and take a good look at your strengths and focus on them- fuck your weaknesses! Don't treat your job like a social place. You are there to make $ and the other girls with just get the fuck out of your way when you are on a war path to find and capture that $$$$$!!!

    I know all that is easier said than done, but don't let the new girls run you out of the club! Let me tell you a story that isn't exactly the same situation but should have the same result:

    When I started dancing in 1994 (still in high school), it was unheard of that an 18yr old was dancing. The average age for the girls in my home club was 24 but the veterans who had been there for at least 3 yrs were around 26. My presence posed a HUGE problem for the "older" girls and they made it known to me that I WASN'T going to take over their customers and make more $ than they were. Like high school bullies they will give me evil eyes, sabotage my clothes, talk down to me and what hit the nail in the coffin was when two of them physically cornered me to get me to back down or quit. They were big girls and my suburban upbringing didn't give me the skills to defend myself physically so I used my confidence to respectfully appreciate their words and authority. Since I didn't cower in the corner and appeared to be fearful but still stand up for myself, they let me go with a mutual understanding that I would stay out of their way and avoid any customers that they claimed to be theirs.

    The point of the story is, their confidence taught me to back off and respect them as the superiors in the club and my confidence taught them that they couldn't run me off and we all ended up being friends afterward. I still love telling this story even though you wouldn't completely understand unless you were there because it reminds me that the dancer I am today is because of the lessons I have learned along the way.

    I don't know if that will help, but I just want you to succeed no matter what others are trying to put in your way- you can overcome it!

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    thanks for the advice girls

    I had a shitty night-- 1 was there. I didn't really want to go into work but needed the $ so I just tried to make myself feel more confident by getting my nails/hair done and taking extra long to get ready...

    It was just one girl so it was easier to ignore her. I got my first VIP and the guy shorted me $400 and so i am really upset at the moment...I went home with $350 when I could have gone home with $750, which to me is like a dream because I've been making an average of $150/200 on my good nights... and after fees and tipouts I ended up not making any money from that VIP at all, and the guy was a creep and kept trying to finger me.

    But it has upped my confidence, I got 22 dances (which is lot at my small club) when the most I'd gotten before this week was 12 on some really drunk guy, and besides that 6 was the most. None of the other girls got VIPs last night or tonight hehe. So I'm trying not to think of how much $ i lost... and the food/rent it would have paid for and just concentrate on the fact that I have to be getting better, since besides last night I've been my 12 record every night... but im just so upset about the $

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    God/dess Athenathefabulous's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    NEVER make a transaction worth 400$ without getting paid first. I always get my money before going to vip, actually its club rules. That way you know you will get paid, and if they are being creepy and trying to finger you you can leave with your money. Seriously, dont ever put yourself in a place where you will be shorted 400$. You can do table dances and stuff for smaller money first and get paid later, but the big money stuff should be paid up front. Not only that, but its hard to bounce back mentally after being shorted that much money. therefore, it will be even harder to make money and hustle the rest of the night. Im amazed that you were able to sell the 22 dances after that. Kudos to you on being able to put it behind you enough to make more money,... I am not sure i would have been able to do the same.

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    well the worst part was that i DID get the $ upfront. what basically happened was he did two dances and then wanted a vip. i told him he had to pay first and he went and withdrew cash but couldnt withdraw enough so he had to charge some of it and give me "chips" in return. he was confusing me with the amounts and kept changing his payment methods and then i had to go to two different managers to get the chips and the customer kept nagging at me "lets go now i want to go now"... he basically didnt give me the cash, only the chips and i didnt realize it until he was gone.

    i should have counted everything out before going in the room, i was just positive he had handed me the cash. what makes me sick is that he knew the whole dance he had gotten away with the $400 and still tried all that shit, and in end it ended up costing me $70 to give him that vip... and he tipped me $5!

    the 22 dances was after the vip, i didnt sell or even work after i realized i had lost the $ i was too upset, i wish i had been able to! i still havent really gotten over it and it's been almost a week, im just so broke right now and my club has been insanely dead i keep thinking about it.

    im just trying to tell myself its a lesson learned and itll never happen again..

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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    Babe i'm sorry you had a bad experience, but like you said, it's a lesson learned. Kudos to you, you turned that anger into motivation to get those 22 dances, it's a hard thing to do. Even if you're out of some money, it's still a learning experience and money can't buy you that.

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    just wanted to let you ladies know i got another VIP tonight (and got all the cash this time)! i'm so proud I've gotten 2 now in the first month of dancing and at $600 they're hard to sell... i was positive last weekend i would never get another one so i'm relieved!

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    Featured Member MsClaireVoyant's Avatar
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    Default Re: feeling intimidated by bitchy new girls

    Good job!



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