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Thread: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    I get this on average once a night, at least every other day.

    With some customers it's "you're really intelligent... you don't seem like you belong here." From others its "you're too smart for this. You should get a better job."

    I don't even talk about anything scholarly at work. I got this from a guy last night who was from San Francisco and we were discussing whether LA or SF was better.

    Is this supposed to be a compliment?

    Do you think dancers must be stupid and that's why they're dancing?

    I get it 50/50 on spenders/time wasters... is this a way to justify not spending money (she's smart so I don't need to spend money on her?)

    I'm just curious as to the motivation behind this stupid line. It's really annoying and insulting, obviously I'm dancing because either a) I don't have other options or b) I like it (it's a mixture of the two). And any dancer making money is intellgent... she's figured out a business strategy that works for her.
    Last edited by audrey_k; 07-13-2009 at 03:24 PM.

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    Veteran Member SteveSmith's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    I've never said that to a dancer but it sounds like Customer Shit (CS): Passive aggressive behavior that is meant to annoy the dancer (they're expressing anger toward you but in hidden form). If they didn't use that line, "you're too smart for this job," they'd have found something else about you to give you a backhanded insult. CS is common in the SC and takes many forms.

    Think up a good comeback line to counter this CS the next time you hear it.
    Last edited by SteveSmith; 07-13-2009 at 05:22 AM.

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    Do you think dancers must be stupid and that's why they're dancing?
    Whether any of us like it or not, there is a certain societal stereotype of what a stripper is and a certain societal stereotype of what a male patron of a stripclub is. Until someone spends a certain amount of time in clubs, those stereotypes are what is expected.

    I confess to having had a pre-conceived notion of what the people would be like in the clubs when I first visited. I found out my expectations were not accurate in all cases. There were some who fit the stereotypes on both the dancer and customer sides but unfortunately one has to spend a bit of time in there to realize not everyone fits the stereotype.

    Its sounds to me that the guys saying this to you are coming to that realization. I doubt they mean any insult by it.

    Maybe this why some dancers admit to dumbing themselves down for the customers ( and thus their purses) benefit?
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

    If you're in your twenties and aren't a liberal, you have no heart. If you're in you're forties and aren't a conservative, you have no brain - Winston Churchill

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    With some customers it's "you're really intelligent... you don't seem like you belong here." From others its "you're too smart for this. You should get a better job."

    Is this supposed to be a compliment?

    Do you think dancers must be stupid and that's why they're dancing?
    1.If they think it so bad for you why are they there?
    2.They feel intimidated by you and need to make you feel bad so they feel better.
    3.They are trying to give you a compliment on something besides your sexuality because they are trying to pick you up and have no fuking clue what they are doing.

    1. I said it before and i will say it again, any woman that can use her sexual prowess to make a very good living off of men is far from stupid and i call it downright genius. They are indeed the ignorant ones, which i find out that most people like this are social morons.

    Oh and as far as comebacks.....i could give you a lot of smartass remarks back if you want to be done with them. I will try to think of a cute one if you want to try to convert them...lol

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    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Probably multiple reasons including:

    It is something to say to fill air time

    It is considered a compliment that men notice women for more then looks

    It is a gamble that you might enjoy the compliment so much that you will do more, for less, to their benefit.

    It is a point of competition or manipulation; people compete without even thinking about it, so if they see you are hot, rather then cheer you on for your assets they will see it from a POV that benefits them (e.g., the message is, if you were smart you'd be doing something else, like me!, devaluing your sex appeal, increasing the value of their position in society).

    People convey multiple messages in everything they say and do. There is their words of course which convey data, but there is also the on-going jockeying for social position in how their messages are delivered. So all of the above can be true at the same time.

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    cuz they're idiots? or maybe white knights.

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    Featured Member vmurphy252's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    ^Don't think I've ever said "you're too smart FOR THIS". I may comment on their intelligence, but, if you're happy dancing, I say great for you. I think it demonstrates greater intelligence to dance if it's maximizing you're profits for the amount of work expended (be it working few days for a long period of time, or lots of days for a shorter period so you can "retire") so you can enjoy other pursuits. Of course, not everyone is in that position, but...

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    Veteran Member fast tan77's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Next time say 'gee do you think so, I have to take my final stripper exan tomorrow and I am afraid I am going to fail'.

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  11. #9
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Heh.. I usually say "you're right, I AM smart and thats exactly WHY I'm doing this" The good ones will understand : )

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    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    With some customers it's "you're really intelligent... you don't seem like you belong here." From others its "you're too smart for this. You should get a better job."

    Tell them to tell you what they're making an hour. I guarantee it is considerably less than what we make, so then ask, better job in terms of what exactly?

    Is this supposed to be a compliment?

    It is what you would call a backwards compliment. They mean it in a good way but don't realize how insulting they're actually being.

    Do you think dancers must be stupid and that's why they're dancing?

    The stereotypical stripper (which no one can seem to get past) is coked out and trailer trash. They don't expect intelligence.

    I get it 50/50 on spenders/time wasters... is this a way to justify not spending money (she's smart so I don't need to spend money on her?)

    I'll bet after 75% of these guys say this to you they don't buy a dance. So yes it is a time waster and it's not so much that it's "she's smart I don't need to spend $$ on her" it's that "she's way too intimidating, I can't keep up with her".


    Do you assume all dancers must be stupid and that's why they dance?

    Again, it's a stereotype thing. They're confused and not sure how to respond to an intelligent dancer. They don't expect it. There are always guys who appreciate a dancer who can hold her own in a conversation about whatever, but there are always going to be the guys who can't handle someone more intelligent then they are. If you learn to read your customer you will know which personality to give them.


    Also, some guys can't understand that we do this because we want to. It kinda fucks with their head because they've been taught that girls do this as a last resort.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

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    God/dess Gia2608's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Wow the guys really came through with some good answers!

    I get this a lot too ( I guess because the custies are talking to me, not reading something I've misspelled- lol).
    I'd say eight or nine times out of ten they are just trying to compliment you.

    I kind of laugh it off, and say "Really, I was playing dumb" or Sometimes I'll just flash my tits then say "Gimme a dollar" , which is kind of bizarre behavior but puts the ball back in your court.
    XoXo Gia
    Danielle Fishell (the Dish): "If the Super-Star thing doesn't work out, Gia makes a great stripper name"

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    Featured Member vmurphy252's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    but there are always going to be the guys who can't handle someone more intelligent then they are.

    Hey, let's not get carried away. I didn't say anything about MORE intelligent...

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    heh...

    "you're too smart for this; you don't look like you belong here" always gets the same response from me: "you're right about that! Would you like to give me $30,000 for my tuition so I can quit?"

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by Gia2608 View Post

    I kind of laugh it off, and say "Really, I was playing dumb" or Sometimes I'll just flash my tits then say "Gimme a dollar" , which is kind of bizarre behavior but puts the ball back in your court.
    I love these

    "really, i was playing dumb" i would love to see their faces after that one.

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    How about "Thanks, that's really sweet. You know - you're way too good looking to be paying for girls company when CLEARLY you could be getting all you want somewhere else - why are YOU here?" LOL

    I've said it before - albeit in a different way, and not in those words - more of a "what is your reason for choosing this career" conversation starter as I really do enjoy hearing teh girls stories.

    As Xdamage pointed out, it will vary in intention from custie to custie, but I think it's rarely an insult. Either they suck at asking the question and mean it as I do, or they're new to the club and have the previously mentioned preconceptions, or or or or.

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by JayATee View Post
    With some customers it's "you're really intelligent... you don't seem like you belong here." From others its "you're too smart for this. You should get a better job."

    Tell them to tell you what they're making an hour. I guarantee it is considerably less than what we make, so then ask, better job in terms of what exactly?

    Is this supposed to be a compliment?

    It is what you would call a backwards compliment. They mean it in a good way but don't realize how insulting they're actually being.

    Do you think dancers must be stupid and that's why they're dancing?

    The stereotypical stripper (which no one can seem to get past) is coked out and trailer trash. They don't expect intelligence.

    I get it 50/50 on spenders/time wasters... is this a way to justify not spending money (she's smart so I don't need to spend money on her?)

    I'll bet after 75% of these guys say this to you they don't buy a dance. So yes it is a time waster and it's not so much that it's "she's smart I don't need to spend $$ on her" it's that "she's way too intimidating, I can't keep up with her".


    Do you assume all dancers must be stupid and that's why they dance?

    Again, it's a stereotype thing. They're confused and not sure how to respond to an intelligent dancer. They don't expect it. There are always guys who appreciate a dancer who can hold her own in a conversation about whatever, but there are always going to be the guys who can't handle someone more intelligent then they are. If you learn to read your customer you will know which personality to give them.


    Also, some guys can't understand that we do this because we want to. It kinda fucks with their head because they've been taught that girls do this as a last resort.
    Agree with everything above. If I get it from a guy before he spends money I pretty much know I'm not going to make any from him (maybe 2 guys have bought dances after saying this). So I wait about 20 seconds before asking for a dance, and if he turns me down I will then make up some smartass line.

    I do get it a lot from customers after they've spent money, usually as they're paying or have paid and I'm saying good bye to them as they're leaving. I've had many customers tell me I'm intellgent and spend money, but they do not usually phrase it as "you're too smart for this. "

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    God/dess JayATee's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by vmurphy252 View Post
    Hey, let's not get carried away. I didn't say anything about MORE intelligent...
    Well no one is more intelligent then you V.

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    I do get it a lot from customers after they've spent money, usually as they're paying or have paid and I'm saying good bye to them as they're leaving. I've had many customers tell me I'm intellgent and spend money, but they do not usually phrase it as "you're too smart for this. "
    Then use CarlyMIA's response to this one. It's perfect! And you already have your money.
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

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  22. #18
    CarlyMIA
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    I got my line from a moment in Family Guy.

    Someone was looking at Quagmire's (sp?) hair and goes..
    "What do you use for your hair?"
    "Head and SHoulders"
    "But you dont have dandruff...."
    "Exactly!"
    .
    ..
    ...
    "OOoooooooooo!!!!"

    Same mentality : ) LoL
    You're so smart why are you doing this?
    Exactly WHY I'm doing this!

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    Veteran Member SteveSmith's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    A telltale sign that it's Customer Shit (passive aggressive): If what the customer says or does annoys the dancer, then it's probably Customer Shit (CS).

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    I especially like (sarcasm) when a customer says this or something similar like and then tries to do any number of rude things to me in the VIP or asks me to be his hooker.

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by CarlyMIA View Post
    Heh.. I usually say "you're right, I AM smart and thats exactly WHY I'm doing this" The good ones will understand : )
    That's what I say back, and it usually works. Because I, like audrey, get this ALL THE DAMN TIME.

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    God/dess audrey_k's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Well once they've spent money it doesn't bother me as much.

    My favorite was this guy that came in a couple weeks. He gave the "you're too smart for this, you could do so much better" BS and then turned me down for a dance.

    Me: Really? You don't want to spend some money on me so I don't have to do this?
    Customer: No. I don't want to encourage you to keep working here.
    Me: (walks away and "accidently" knocks drink over)
    Customer: Hey! What was that?
    Me: Me encouraging you to not be a customer at strip clubs anymore.

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    ^

    THAT is fucking awesome! Good for you!
    Sorry I missed church. I was too busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian.

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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    Well once they've spent money it doesn't bother me as much.

    My favorite was this guy that came in a couple weeks. He gave the "you're too smart for this, you could do so much better" BS and then turned me down for a dance.

    Me: Really? You don't want to spend some money on me so I don't have to do this?
    Customer: No. I don't want to encourage you to keep working here.
    Me: (walks away and "accidently" knocks drink over)
    Customer: Hey! What was that?
    Me: Me encouraging you to not be a customer at strip clubs anymore.
    That was funny.

    But be careful, your club owners may not like that kind of interaction.

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    Featured Member sananeko's Avatar
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    Default Re: customers, why do you tell me I am "too smart" for this?

    Quote Originally Posted by audrey_k View Post
    Well once they've spent money it doesn't bother me as much.

    My favorite was this guy that came in a couple weeks. He gave the "you're too smart for this, you could do so much better" BS and then turned me down for a dance.

    Me: Really? You don't want to spend some money on me so I don't have to do this?
    Customer: No. I don't want to encourage you to keep working here.
    Me: (walks away and "accidently" knocks drink over)
    Customer: Hey! What was that?
    Me: Me encouraging you to not be a customer at strip clubs anymore.
    Perfect!

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