Last night was sooooo horrible. Here are the highlights from the possessed monsters who decided to walk into my club and act like assholes. I think some of them were on cocaine:
Me: (Dancing around on the pole stage in VIP)
Supreme Asshole: (walking around VIP, looks at me)
Me: (Smile, wave, wag butt, come hither flirtiness)
Supreme Asshole: (who, me?)
Me: (uhuh, tip me!)
Supreme Asshole: (walk over, pull out 5 dollar bill, fold it into a bow) "So, how's your night been?"
Me: (hey, a nice guy, finally!) "Do you want the real answer or the proper answer?"
Supreme Asshole: "How much have you made so far?"
Me: "$30" (pout)
Supreme Asshole: (gives me bow) Well, I'm over there (points at party room) and the people I'm with suck.
Me: I don't suck.
Supreme Asshole: I want you to come party with me when you get off stage. You have to come straight to me though, not my friends, ok?
Me: (WOohoOoo, VIP, yess! score!) "Ok! I'll be back up!"
On my way to the next stage, I tell the VIP manager the guy that tipped me asked me to come back. After my stages, I go back upstairs, go to the party room, see my guy is sitting there without anyone on his lap, and snuggle up. The rest of the room is cluttered with guys and the usual VIP girls.
Me: "Here I am!"
Supreme Asshole: "WHAT THE FUCK?"
Me: (playing along) "WHAT THE FUCK!"
Supreme Asshole: (looking at me like I'm an alien)
Me: "Uh. Hi. My name is Eden, you folded a five into a bow, told me your name was Todd, and told me to come over here after my stages"
Supreme Asshole: "Uhuh"
Me: "Here I am!"
Supreme Asshole: "I can't deal with this right now"
Me: "You can't... deal with this... right now?" (!??!?!!?!??!?!??!!?!?!)
Supreme Asshole: (just go)
Me: "ok. Thanks for the tip."
I get up and go to the VIP manager
Me: "That was weird"
VIP Manager: Yeah. Those people are really weird...
Random girl from the room walks up to VIP manager and screams "WHO THE FUCK IS THAT GIRL?"
At which point I just head into the dressing room.
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Me: (Walking up to someone smiling and waving) Hi! I'm Eden, what are you guys celebrating tonight?
Kid: Oh, noth-
Asshole: We are celebrating!
Kid: Uh, I guess we are celebrating
Me: (Smiling at asshole) What are you celebrating?
Asshole: That we are in here watching all these naked women (points at stage) and you are watching us watch them.
Me: Uh. OK. (?!?!?!??!)
Asshole: You didn't get it did you?
Me: Noooo...
Asshole: That just makes it all the better! To Education!
Everyone: To Education!
Me: I'm... just... going... to leave... now...
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Sleeze: (Finishing dance) "Wow that was great, that should cost me extra!"
Me: "It will!"
Sleeze: "How much do I owe you?"
Me: "$30"
Sleeze: (pulls out 30 from a pocket)
Me: "Haha, looks like I'm taking your last dollar!"
Sleeze: (pulls out a money clip with a few thousand)
Me: "Woah, woah, and you said you were leaving? We're going to party!"
Sleeze: "If you want the other $2000, you'll come to my hotel room after your shift"
Me: I have to go on stage, unless you'll do a shot with me
Sleeze: Oh, I would much rather pay you $2000 later than give the club $75 just to get you off stage
Me: k.
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Me: (Snuggles up with friendly guy)
Waitress: (walks up) "Hey, you guys need to go back in the champagne room"
Friendly Guy: "We want to be out here where the action is"
Waitress: "You guys can't just go to another table, that screws up the tab"
Friendly Guy: "Can't you work something out? We want to see the girls out here"
Waitress" You need to go back in the champagne room and get dances from the girls I send you"
WHAT THE...I can deal with a million "No"s; but what the hell is with people just coming into the club to play mind games? Last night was like wave after wave of shit, no matter how big a smile I put on.
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I can deal with a million "No"s; but what the hell is with people just coming into the club to play mind games? Last night was like wave after wave of shit, no matter how big a smile I put on.
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I'm having a lot of nights like that lately. I say go to work and try to make up for last night being bad!

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