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Thread: I think dancing is making me hate women.

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    Default I think dancing is making me hate women.

    You would think dancing would make me hate guys, but I actually find myself still being ok with guys, but I hate being around women (for the most part) now. I didn't always feel this way, but after dancing for the last 2 years (I quit for a long time and came back) I find myself hating women. I think it's just because of the ones I have to deal with there mainly. The strippers are ,for the most part, catty and competitive and most where I work are just rude (won't move when you say excuse me, pushing, know it all sort of behavior) and the customers are acting worse than normal because they're uncomfortable and think they need to compete as well. Don't get me wrong the guys are jerks, but I think they're the lesser of two evils most nights. If nothing else at least I can carry on a small conversation without it being a pissing contest. Anyone agree or disagree? How has this job affected your viewpoints with women/men?

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    I think I know what you mean. There are girls at my club that I think are just plain rude! They will sit down with customers and talk shit about other dancers....basically because they are jealous of the other girl (dancer). I hear it from customers when they talk shit. Maybe, its just me but I refuse to talk shit about other dancers (even if I dont like them). I think its in poor taste. Dancers will find out personal info about another dancer and then tell customers!

    I know we are all out there trying to make money, but I dont think its necessary to do this type of stuff to make a buck.

    because of this drama i try to keep my personal info to a minimum in the dressing room.

    Sometimes I rather talk to customers then listen to the dressing room drama. Oh well, thats just my 2 cents.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Women you work with ≠ all women

    Sounds like you work in a club that might be poorly managed? (Issues like these generally are eliminated or marginalized when there's a strong, supportive management staff. Tho not always...)
    I don't know how long you've been working, but maybe you are starting to get a little burnt? Maybe you can try to take some time off and/or find a different club?
    "Punk's not dead."

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    I totally hear what you're saying. 100% BUT at the end of the day:

    as mvivian said, Women you work with ≠ all women

    IMHO, I'm thinking that maybe you should get involved in some activities where you will interact with ladies that fall into a different demographic.
    Yoga? Book club? I'm not sure if you're in school, but the lady friends in my study/lab groups are often my saving grace after a long work weekend.


    I really do get like this sometimes too but then I remember that if I start to hold grudges, have prejudice or bitterness, I'm the one who will have to carry around that negativity. They will continue being however it is they are being either which way.
    Try to keep in mind that it is never
    ever
    ever
    personal.
    And be grateful that YOU don't have to treat others like that to feel secure .

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    It's made me hate women.
    I've truly seen how fucking scandelous some of these women are in thier personal lives... and it's no fucking wonder I can't find a decent guy... They've all been screwed over and turned into bitter pricks by women like the ones I work with!

    I realize that it's not like all women are like this... just like all men aren't like SC customers... but for fuck's sake... I can't BELIEVE the number of women who screw over/lead on/use/cheat on men and don't think there's anything wrong with it!
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Quote Originally Posted by mvivian View Post
    Women you work with ≠ all women

    This is very true. It also goes the same for Men in a strip club. You're going to get a higher percentage of assholes, of either sex, period. I've met a few really great people while stripping, but lets face it, strip clubs can be douchebag magnets. That goes for customers -and- dancers.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    I agree with OP 100%.I can't stand most women,but have been like that even before dancing.I remember in Moscow,in my university my best friend at the time,a girl,said:"I hate women",and I thought about it for a long time,and eventually came to the same conclusion.It wasn't even the many years of dancing that made this decision,but just watching the manipulation,cattiness,etc,even on my own mother,who's THE worst,she even competes with me,her own daughter,for my father's attention,pathetic.So because of all this,most of my friends have always been guys,with a few close girlfriends,of course,but I always found men to be easier to get along with.

    To add,this has,for me,nothing to do with bitterness of any kind,just don't feel like dealing with extra drama.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Having to compete for money and the attention of the opposite sex simultaneously, especially if drugs and alcohol are involved, tends to turn people into assholes. You'll see men acting similarly if you watch that reality show the Bachelorette. Believe me, if's definitely not a female-only phenomenon. The SC environment pits us against each other in many ways, which incidentally also prevents us from creating any real solidarity to improve our working conditions or from creating lots of true lasting friendships or cultivating basic respect for one another

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Stripping attracts the crazies on both sides of the fence.

    Sure, some of us are 'normal' (as normal as idiosyncratic humans can be), but it does seem to be one of those industries (and yes, there are definitely others) that attracts the extremes of humanity.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Quote Originally Posted by DesuvsDeath View Post
    It's made me hate women.
    I've truly seen how fucking scandelous some of these women are in thier personal lives... and it's no fucking wonder I can't find a decent guy... They've all been screwed over and turned into bitter pricks by women like the ones I work with!

    I realize that it's not like all women are like this... just like all men aren't like SC customers... but for fuck's sake... I can't BELIEVE the number of women who screw over/lead on/use/cheat on men and don't think there's anything wrong with it!
    I completely agree. And dancing has given me serious anger management issues.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    For some reason, the cattier, nastier dancers I work with just amuse me. However, I am VERY careful not to let out details of my personal life to them. I just listen to them bitch,moan and generally complain as I smile, nod my head and say the absolute minimal in kind words. I think maybe because I am very quiet about my personal lifestyle, the nicer dancers tend to want to open up to me And they do and talk, talk talk they do as well

    That part confuses me. I'm flattered, I guess, but gaining a co-worker's confidence and friendship isn't something I go out of my way to covet. It's strange how that happens. But it could be worse, right?
    (Formerly known as 'Korina')

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Probably most of this has to do with too many girls, too high of fees and too few spending customers. It's hard to be a back-stabbing bitch if you are busy making money.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Quote Originally Posted by DesuvsDeath View Post
    It's made me hate women.
    I've truly seen how fucking scandelous some of these women are in thier personal lives... and it's no fucking wonder I can't find a decent guy... They've all been screwed over and turned into bitter pricks by women like the ones I work with!

    I realize that it's not like all women are like this... just like all men aren't like SC customers... but for fuck's sake... I can't BELIEVE the number of women who screw over/lead on/use/cheat on men and don't think there's anything wrong with it!
    The girls I work with are cool for the most part, in limited doses. But I totally know what you mean. I get really ticked off at this one girl who has a customer believing that she is going to move in with/marry him but has no plans to do this. He tells me about how she's going to move in with him and how she is going to marry him, and I know better. He used to get dances from he when she wasn't there, but she found out and got mad at him for "cheating on her." Then she complains about how he is suffocating her! So I have to distance myself from them so that I don't open my mouth to him, bc it's none of my business, really. I know some girls who talk about other girls to the customers, but that just makes it obvious how insecure they are. And many of them are backstabbers. I never share my personal shit with any of them. I try to laugh and goof around with these girls but do my own thing. They probably think I'm a big goofball/dork/idiot. I dont' care. They aren't payin' my bills.
    Just keep doing your thang and keep smiling while they self-destruct. Because they almost always do.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    I've never felt this way, very few strippers have ever been mean to me. Guess I've been lucky, but I've mastered the art of keeping to myself, and only being really sweet and positive if spoken to, and to never say more than the minimum.

    I have, however, grown to feel sorry for a lot of them...but not all women in general.

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    Veteran Member mia_fey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    The women that I work with are alright for the most part. It's the female customers I can't stand. Why would they go into someone else's workplace with an attitude and try to tear them down? And why are trying to compete? (This reply is brought to you by the crappy night I had last night.)

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    mia, i know what you mean. it's not dancers i have a problem with, so much as non-dancing women who seem to like to whisper and giggle and point when they find out what i do.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    Yep, the girls i work with are bloody awesome. The female customers though? 90% of them are heinous. I had one near the stage sitting with her boyfriend pointing to me going 'Her body is shit, mine is so much better. And she can't dance either. I could do a better job!' Totally within earshot. Yeah, babe, i'm sure you'd do a wicked job at 5am after you've been ill all night in the dressing room and damn exhausted from a virus/cold but still required to do table sets until closing. Be my guest.

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    Default Re: I think dancing is making me hate women.

    yeah the female customers we get are so rude, i get comments like that all the time from them, looking me up and down going 'im so much better than her' though im a size 6/8 and theyre like a 20..lmao they just want to make themselves feel better cos its one of the few places they can go where theyre not in control
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