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Thread: Guy problems

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    Default Guy problems

    I met this guy about 8 months ago and he seemed really nice and normal, so I messed it up on purpose - getting too drunk to answewr the phone, texting stupid drunk stuff, etc.

    He asked me out for a Friday, but I tested "forget about it" then I got pissed when he didn't call and blew up his phone wasted.

    We would then get in fights but we both kept calling for some reason.

    June, I call him for a booty call and it happened and he was nice enough that I still liked him.

    A couple days later he wanted me to come over again, but I was too drunk to drive so I said maybe some other time.

    That weekend I called to invite him to cancert like three times (my brother was too sick to go and I had the extra ticket).

    He never once called to say he got my messages, so I left some not so nice messages a week later.

    Then I called in Septmber and he called seven times the next day. I blew him off.

    I call him in October and we hooked up on a Sunday. I didn't sleep with him. All he kept saying is that he hoped I would come over again and play Trivial Pursuit.

    I told him at the end of that night, well, you're going to have to call me.

    I've texted two innocent messages to be safe and have a good weekend. He texts back thanks.

    So, this past Thursday, I finally get the nerve to call and it goes to voicemail and I leave a nice message about the game and call me anytime.

    Here's the weird part - the next day he texts me this old picture of him skiing, like off a jump and I'm like what the f*** does this mean.

    Next day I text him back from a football game and he texts back within a minute.

    I'm not exactly getting the leave me alone vibe because he responds so quickly, but what the hell. He doesn't call to meet up but he doesn't just cut me off or ignore me either.

    Meanwhile Halloween weekend, I run into some guys who know him, he's about 12 years older. They can't believe I know him, keep looking at me like I'm lying and then say weel he never talked about meeting you. But then they proceed to tell me what a good and nice and sweet guy he is.

    I've been around the block, but this is too weird.

    Any thoughts, even negative ones?

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    No offense, but I would never call a woman for any reason whatsoever who told me 'forget about it'.

    It sounds like a horrible situation. I am definitely not impressed he called you 7 times after you blew him off so many times though, unless I am getting the wrong idea from your description of what happened. I won't ever call a woman more than once without a reply.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Yeah, I'm sure it sounds horrible. We can't all have wonderful lives or the world wouldn't be so interesting would it.

    I live in the country and about 95% of people here are married or just out of high school.

    The fact that I've never been married and don't have kids at 34 makes me seem out of place and suspect, as many people have shared with me. These are pretty much good ole boys who wonder what is wrong with me (I lived in big city CA). They can't imagine a woman who didn't get pregnant before 25 by choice, what is birth control, you know.

    This guy was different and also had never been married at 46.

    I'm not asking anyone to be impressed that he called so much after I called. By the way, I had misplaced my phone that day so I didn't even know he was calling. It does tell me that he is at least somewhat interested though, so the question still stands.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Quote Originally Posted by kittygirl View Post

    The fact that I've never been married and don't have kids at 34 makes me seem out of place and suspect, as many people have shared with me. These are pretty much good ole boys who wonder what is wrong with me (I lived in big city CA). They can't imagine a woman who didn't get pregnant before 25 by choice, what is birth control, you know.
    Jesus H Christ, that sounds horrible! Get the hell out of that awful place ASAMFP, that would probably solve your problem (though not necessarily with him in particular, lol).

    I didn't mean to sound harsh before, but it sounded like you were saying you had more or less blown him off a few times. I never have called any woman back if it seemed like she was blowing me off at all.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Yeah it sucks and it does kind of drive me crazy but I grew up here and now I'm a little stuck, so it would be nice to hang out with a guy in the meantime.

    I never blew him off until the one day he called and I didn't call back because I had initially called him drunk and at the time he had blocked my number so I was a little pissed.

    Since then he has unblocked my number and so I got together with him like two weeks ago.

    Yeah it sounds crazy and dramatic, but Jerry Springer wouldn't have a show if it didn't happen. Some people are limited by looks, the others are limited by sanity

    I'm sort of thinking he may be a little mental, which might explain why his friends couldn't believe it that I knew him. I used to think he was a player and that was why he was erratic, but then I don't think his friends would be able to figure out that he had never mentioned me in particular right after meeting me or try to convince me he's a really good guy.

    The one thing that gets me is why he responded to my call with a picture of him skiiing and that's it. I find it really weird.

    My sister thought maybe he wanted me to admire his athletic skills, which i sort of did the next day, but just weird.

    I guess the same applies to us all out here - maybe there is a reason he never got married. But, i still like him. He's smart, quirky, funny, and doesn't trip off our past fights at all.

    One reason he might be a little pissy is he wanted me to stay the night this last time, but I was pissed that the time before he wanted to give me a ride home after I slept with him but wouldn't let him go down on me. It was my way of kind of paying him back. He seemed to pull away when I said I was leaving, but he still said he wanted me to come over again for Trivial Pursuit.

    At the very least I hope you find the story entertaining.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Quote Originally Posted by kittygirl View Post
    Some people are limited by looks, the others are limited by sanity...
    Now that is entertaining. I fucking love it!

    I got the wrong impression from the OP, I think. Sorry. Maybe because I can never sleep after working weekend nights, I am having trouble following some of it. Like you were mad that he was mad that you wouldn't let him go down on you?? Hey at least he wanted to haha, some guys are lame and don't want to do it.

    I'd say he was trying to impress you with the skiing pic, but I could be wrong. Maybe he's just a bit strange. You say he's 46 but never married? Has he ever lived with anyone? I've never been married but lived with three women for a total of 12 years. but I'm probably a bit strange anyway.

    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    He says he lived with two women for 5 and 7 years, but this isn't the kind of place where you keep your options open.

    When I was in CA thet would be normal, but here there is a lot of pressure to get married and have kids. If I had stayed here, I'd probably be married with kids too.

    Thanks for the feedback.

    I'm just confused why someone would keep interacting but not really be interested. I mean he had my number blocked, no one asked him to unblock it, he chose to so why keep saying I should come over again and then never follow through?

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    OP - i've been in a kind of similar situation before. i play extremely hard-to-get even if i like the guy. i don't really ever get mad at them like it seems you did though. but anyway, you're both still around cause you like each other, the sex is good, but you're too scared to put yourself out there and be serious about it. IMO at least.

    and the skiing pic was his way of telling you that he's skiing probably.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Update:

    He just texted me a picture of him. That's it no words.

    I hope he isn't a member here...that would creep me out.

    I have dated and had guy friends, but this is so weird.

    What the f**? Who does this. Should I be afraid of this guy?

    I mean we both said hurtful things to each other, some over the top. I would be embarassed to tell you what and why I am still civil with him. I made hurtful comments myself and at some points in life hanging with someone erratic is better than speaking to no one.

    I am starting to really think he might be schizo or bipolar or something. I don't know if I'm a firm believer in this stuff, but what in the world is this.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    ^ maybe he's just trying to get your attention and doesn't know what to say. sounds similar to when i send guys a pic of my ass.
    or just a few days ago a dude i haven't talked to in months and never even kissed sent me a pic of him and his dick. no words. i had one word for it "buhhh".
    he totally could be bi-polar, there's nothing to believe in, it exists. many people have it. some more severe than others, so he could have a mild case which makes it harder to detect, but possible to live with. sounds like you just need to either have a talk with him like you are with us here, or move on.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    I texted him back and said I liked the pic, what are you up to?

    No reponse.

    This is why it drives me nuts. I don't expect an invitation. I feel to bloated to hang out, but why does someone play this game?

    I'm super shy, but I try to force myself to be more responsive because I don't want to hurt his feelings.

    I'm just trying not to take it personally like I did before. I would automatically assume he didn't like me or had a girlfriend. Now, I can see it's something else altogether.

    In a way, I know no man would waste so much effort on a booty call (8 months and counting of drama) especially if he had other girls around.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    This is very interesting; all who seek should make notes.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    He did text back asking for a pic.

    I sent one of me and the dog.

    More difficult to use in whacking or slasher fantasies.

    Maybe he's just really shy, but my mom now thinks he looks mentally ill (i don't know if i trust her photo diagnosis).

    But, if anyone has dated anyone bipolar or schizophrenic what have you noticed.

    I would totally still give it a chance. They are probably no more dangerous to date and I've never heard of a serial killer who actually was diagnosed (aren't they usually "psycho/sociopaths").

    I need to get laid regularly.

    I mean it's sad when you wonder who could possibly need to take the pill. Since I moved back here two years ago one pack of condoms would have sufficed.

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    Featured Member laurcon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Guy problems

    lol @ the pill thing. i take that shit so i don't get my period! although it causes lots of breakthrough bleeding so i'm bleeding all the time anyway, so i don't have much sex either. i got most of it out of my system in college.
    oh and i don't mind the bleeding part of my period, its the IBS and acne that comes along with it i can't take!

    sorry, back to the bi-polar thing, if he was really bad, you'd know it. my best friend from college came down with a bad case right after graduation... the dude seriously thought he was jesus, was talking a mile a minute, was paranoid, it was so scary. that's the mania part. then when he's down its more of a normal depression, but very deep and suicidal. if he were really schizo, you'd probably notice actual different personalities.
    lots of people live just fine with slight bi-polar, its a medical condition like any other so they do still deserve to be loved too. and lol @ photo diagnosis. i think you just need to talk to him about having sex more regularly. just be willing and open to what comes

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Thanks for being cool.

    I think he's still sweet, but weird.
    Last edited by kittygirl; 11-16-2009 at 01:30 PM. Reason: personal

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Schizo' doesn't mean multiple personalities. The person's thoughts just seem to be cut off from reality; something inside is diverting the person from being realistic with delusions and such.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    I think I was drunk that last post, it doesn't make much sense to me so I'm a little mortified this got resurrected.

    Anywho, I'll update you on the situation.

    He sends me a text last Sunday asking for a pic of me, I send a cute one, he seemed happy and then nothing for a whole week.

    No one is that fucking busy.

    So I texted him this - "play your game with some else i'm done" and he didn't even open it (my phone lets me know).

    It's got to be over. He likes the games too much.

    I know he's not that shy, he's called me before. And he seemed interested but doesn't really act on it, so he can go fuck with someone else's head.

    He's getting too old to play these cat and mouse games with no fun.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    And yeah, I noticed the schizo post too. Yeah it's not the pop culture belief of multiple personalities.

    I think he's just a jerk, maybe with a couple jerky personalities.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    I just posted a personal. God, don't let me regret this.

    I'm having trouble meeting single people anywhere around here, so maybe it'll help.

    It's also a subconscious fuck you to the jerk.

    Even though I'm kind of shy and hate online dating because it's not at all like the chemistry you have when you meet someone in person, but maybe I won't be so depressed over this a-hole.

    I still want to tell him off, but I know it's just not worth it. Oh, and I want my picture back

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Quote Originally Posted by kittygirl View Post

    I'm sort of thinking he may be a little mental
    When I got sober, somebody told me a very important saying, that I've used throughout my life since. "If ya spot it, ya got it."

    Really, if I were the guy I would run the FUCK away from you. Why the crazy texts and bullshit and game-playing. If you like one another, be together. If not, move on with your life.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    I think you really like me.

    You always come find me with some pissiness.

    I take it as a compliment.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Just how often are you drunk? I think a good part of your problems is that you're drunk a little too often.

    Denial isn't just a river in Egypt.
    Last edited by threlayer; 11-16-2009 at 04:20 PM.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    Thanks for your concern, but I didn't ask you if you think I drink too much.

    Are you guys all on the rag today?

    You don't have to read this thread. I do appear in others.

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    She's the female version of Cyril

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    Default Re: Guy problems

    I think you are just being rude.

    I guess you explained why in a past post so I won't take it personally.

    I'll leave this thread for you guys to get your aggression out.

    Is it cause it's Monday??

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