Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 42

Thread: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

  1. #1
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    I've been seeing this girl for a while and I'm beginning to think she might be bad longterm material and/or slightly crazy. I would love some advice.

    Instead of me just spilling everything and having you ladies read through pages of text, let's try this: ask me a few questions about her or her personality and I'll answer them 100% truthfully.

    Thanks in advance!

  2. #2
    Featured Member kandie_kitten's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2005
    Posts
    1,944
    Thanks
    164
    Thanked 498 Times in 218 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    As fun as that sounds...no thanks.

  3. #3
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Hm. Thanks for the help.

  4. #4
    God/dess Elvia's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    2,636
    Thanks
    495
    Thanked 744 Times in 433 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    If you want advice, just tell us what your concern is. Don't make a tedious game out of it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Vamp View Post
    As Katherine Hepburn put it so eloquently " Nature is what we were put here to rise above"

  5. #5
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    It's not a tedious game, I just figured it would be much easier/more user friendly if I did it this way than posting everything about our past 12 months. Besides, you're (mostly) females so you know more about the female psyche...I wouldn't know what specific red flags would be, so I would have to just post everything. But if nobody wants to help then fine.

  6. #6
    God/dess Elvia's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    2,636
    Thanks
    495
    Thanked 744 Times in 433 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    ^^^ then what even prompted this question? What makes you think she's crazy? You telling us would be a lot easier and faster then us playing 20 questions and trying to go through every way a person can seem crazy.
    Quote Originally Posted by Vamp View Post
    As Katherine Hepburn put it so eloquently " Nature is what we were put here to rise above"

  7. #7
    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2002
    Location
    NY Capital District
    Posts
    3,775
    Thanks
    758
    Thanked 1,943 Times in 696 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Did she ask you if you wanted her to put cocaine on your penis and then give you a blowjob? That was kind of the start of the end with my last girlfriend. Apparently "no thanks" isn't a good answer.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to lestat1 For This Useful Post:


  9. #8
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by Elvia View Post
    ^^^ then what even prompted this question? What makes you think she's crazy? You telling us would be a lot easier and faster then us playing 20 questions and trying to go through every way a person can seem crazy.
    I'll cliff it the best I can:

    - cries all the time on the phone for no apparent reason
    - biggest freak I've ever met (no fetish/fantasy is off-limits, unless it draws blood)
    - major daddy issues (even to the point of calling me daddy during the act)
    - super clingy
    - told me she would marry me today if I asked, but "will wait forever if I have to"
    - lies a lot

    ^^ these are the big ones, there are more though

  10. #9
    God/dess Elvia's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    2,636
    Thanks
    495
    Thanked 744 Times in 433 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    ok, thanks, now we have something to work with.

    1) do you mean literally no reason, as in you can't even understand what prompted the crying? Or things that are upsetting/emotional, but which you think don't warrant crying? Can you give an example of something she's started crying over that seems off to you? Did you ask her why she was crying?

    2) are the sexual fetishes making you uncomfortable? Have you told her?

    3)Can you give an example of her clinginess that you thought was too much?

    4) how long have you been together?

    5) an you give an example of some of the bigger lies she's told? Are you sure it lies?
    Quote Originally Posted by Vamp View Post
    As Katherine Hepburn put it so eloquently " Nature is what we were put here to rise above"

  11. #10
    Banned
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    With the luggage NJ
    Posts
    2,995
    Thanks
    80
    Thanked 115 Times in 98 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by HumptyBrahh View Post

    Instead of me just spilling everything and having you ladies read through pages of text, let's try this: ask me a few questions about her or her personality and I'll answer them 100% truthfully.
    Is she a bird watcher?

  12. #11
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by Elvia View Post
    ok, thanks, now we have something to work with.



    1) do you mean literally no reason, as in you can't even understand what prompted the crying? Or things that are upsetting/emotional, but which you think don't warrant crying? Can you give an example of something she's started crying over that seems off to you? Did you ask her why she was crying?



    2) are the sexual fetishes making you uncomfortable? Have you told her?



    3)Can you give an example of her clinginess that you thought was too much?



    4) how long have you been together?



    5) an you give an example of some of the bigger lies she's told? Are you sure it lies?


    1. I'll ask, she'll say it's because she misses me or will just say she doesn't know. Most of the time it literally is for no apparent reason but some of it happens while we fight too.

    2. Uncomfortable in the sense that this girl introduced me to my inner freak and I'm not sure I like it. I now know I'm into cuckoldry/swinging, exhibitionism/voyeurism, some forms of BDSM, pretend rape (she acts like she doesn't want it as a form of roleplay), and bestiality (not personally, but watching girls do it) and I don't like that about myself. I wish I could go back to when I was just super horny lol.

    3. Her clinginess comes in waves. It's not so much clingy as it is really really wanting to get married.

    4. Known her for 12 months, together for 6.

    5. In June she went to Florida with her best friend for a week. She told me it was just going to be she and her friend, but later admitted two guys went with them. I asked her about it, she said she didn't want it but her friend brought her fuck buddy and that suddenly turned into two guys. She still maintains she didn't fuck around with anybody.

    Found out that a random screen name that instant messages me from time to time trying to talk dirty was really her testing me.

    Told me she had a gyno appointment, when in reality she didn't. She said she just wanted some time to herself to read (she's an avid reader) and didn't think I would understand.

    She got a separate cell phone solely to talk to me with (her other phone is paid for by her parents but it has limited minutes and no texting, so she got a pay-by-the-day phone for us with unlimited talk and text) but I later found out she had texted a couple of other guys from it after she denied that she had. I asked why, and she said "We were fighting and I felt like shit, and he always used to talk down to me and that's what I deserved at the time."

    Now, the logical conclusion is that she's cheating on me, but due to the aforementioned cuckoldry fetish I try to get her to sleep with other guys a lot and she absolutely refuses to do it (except for one time). The way I see it is if she was cheating, then wouldn't she be excited to go along with my fetish instead of vehemently refusing?
    Quote Originally Posted by Earl_the_Pearl View Post
    Is she a bird watcher?
    No
    Last edited by HumptyBrahh; 11-26-2009 at 11:13 PM.

  13. #12
    Member
    Joined
    May 2006
    Posts
    48
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Does she doodle?

  14. #13
    God/dess Susan-Va's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Richmond, Virginia
    Posts
    3,019
    Thanks
    90
    Thanked 193 Times in 107 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    If you have to ask, then don't do it.

  15. #14
    Featured Member WiseGuy_TX's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Houston,Tx
    Posts
    1,522
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 136 Times in 79 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by HumptyBrahh View Post
    I now know I'm into cuckoldry/swinging, exhibitionism/voyeurism, some forms of BDSM, pretend rape (she acts like she doesn't want it as a form of roleplay), and bestiality (not personally, but watching girls do it) and I don't like that about myself. I wish I could go back to when I was just super horny lol.
    ...sounds like a perfect match. Jump into that wet cement feet first. Go for it!
    "Peter, did you take Stewie to a strip-club? He smells like sweat and fear." - Lois and Stewie (Family Guy) ... "Through early morning fog I see, Visions of the things to be, The pains that are withheld for me, I realize and I can see..."

  16. #15
    God/dess Paris's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    6,345
    Thanks
    168
    Thanked 801 Times in 419 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    You two are wrong for each other. Break it off fast, be as nice as possible but definitely tell her you don't want to see her anymore. What will really turn a semi crazy girl into a raging homicidal maniac is when her boyfriend just stops talking to her without further explanation. For your own safety, just tell her you want to break it off.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


  17. #16
    Curious Guest TheSensei's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    4
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by Paris View Post
    You two are wrong for each other. Break it off fast, be as nice as possible but definitely tell her you don't want to see her anymore. What will really turn a semi crazy girl into a raging homicidal maniac is when her boyfriend just stops talking to her without further explanation. For your own safety, just tell her you want to break it off.

    I agree with the said statement.

    Run, run fast. If she lies to you now, she'll be lying to you for a while, if she even ever stops. Which, I find, most of the time, it won't stop. It's time to pack up shop and move on out.

    Trust and respect are the two main building blocks to a relationship, if one fails, it all fails.

  18. #17
    God/dess Trem's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    2,958
    Thanks
    1,714
    Thanked 3,253 Times in 1,343 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by HumptyBrahh View Post
    I'll cliff it the best I can:


    - lies a lot
    Dealbreaker 100% of the time. None of the other things matter, in fact a few were strong positives. You can never have a good relationship with a liar, its that simple.

  19. #18
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    643
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 111 Times in 79 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Is she young? You mentioned you are 21. She doesn't sound psycho, but like a young girl just learning how to control and manipulate men...with a couple of fails in there.

    FYI...a great deal of girls are like this.

  20. #19
    God/dess firemaiden04's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2008
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    2,652
    Thanks
    3,054
    Thanked 2,005 Times in 903 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Don't blame her because now you're more sexually experienced and into fetish. If you were genuinely not okay with kinky sex, you did her a grave disservice by going along with it, then after the fact saying you hate it and blaming her for it. That's really not cool.

    Other than that, have you talked to her about this stuff? In a sympathetic, genuinely helpful manner? Meaning you aren't calling her crazy and trying to pick a fight.

    In general terms, though, nobody can be happy in a relationship unless they're happy with themselves first. That goes for both of you. People used to tell me that all the time and I never understood it; now, I totally get it. I am 100% single, meaning I'm not seeing anybody and have no plans to start seeing anyone anytime soon. I'm getting my own 1 bedroom apartment for just me and have no intention of ever letting anyone move in. And I have no problems being around just myself for an extended period of time.

    It sounds like she's got some issues she's working on or needs to start working on. You probably do, too. If she's not happy with herself, she will never truly be happy with you. You can help her work on those issues.

  21. #20
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by KiwiStrawberry Splenda View Post
    Is she young? You mentioned you are 21. She doesn't sound psycho, but like a young girl just learning how to control and manipulate men...with a couple of fails in there.

    FYI...a great deal of girls are like this.
    She just turned 20. I'm about a year and a half older. My concern is that you say the bolded as if it's normal and acceptable, almost akin to "a spiderlet just learning how to spin her first web" or "an eaglet just learning how to spread her wings." Learning to control and manipulate men is something no woman should ever learn to do - just because it happens does NOT make it ok or acceptable. My apologies if you didn't mean it like that, but that's how I interpreted it.

    Quote Originally Posted by firemaiden04 View Post
    Don't blame her because now you're more sexually experienced and into fetish. If you were genuinely not okay with kinky sex, you did her a grave disservice by going along with it, then after the fact saying you hate it and blaming her for it. That's really not cool.
    We discovered out fetishes together. When we first met, we were both just really horny. But we learned, together, just how deep our fetishes and kinks run...I taught her just as much as she taught me, which is odd because neither one of us knew that about ourselves prior to meeting.

    Other than that, have you talked to her about this stuff? In a sympathetic, genuinely helpful manner? Meaning you aren't calling her crazy and trying to pick a fight.

    In general terms, though, nobody can be happy in a relationship unless they're happy with themselves first. That goes for both of you. People used to tell me that all the time and I never understood it; now, I totally get it. I am 100% single, meaning I'm not seeing anybody and have no plans to start seeing anyone anytime soon. I'm getting my own 1 bedroom apartment for just me and have no intention of ever letting anyone move in. And I have no problems being around just myself for an extended period of time.

    It sounds like she's got some issues she's working on or needs to start working on. You probably do, too. If she's not happy with herself, she will never truly be happy with you. You can help her work on those issues.
    I pushed her into therapy. She's now been (SUPPOSEDLY) going to private counseling and group therapy sessions for about a month. I have noticed a change in her behavior, and the lies have seemed to stop for the time being - whether she's genuinely trying to tell the truth or is just getting better at lying remains to be seen.

  22. #21
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    643
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 111 Times in 79 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by HumptyBrahh View Post
    She just turned 20. I'm about a year and a half older. My concern is that you say the bolded as if it's normal and acceptable, almost akin to "a spiderlet just learning how to spin her first web" or "an eaglet just learning how to spread her wings." Learning to control and manipulate men is something no woman should ever learn to do - just because it happens does NOT make it ok or acceptable. My apologies if you didn't mean it like that, but that's how I interpreted it.


    You don't know any strippers do you?
    If she doesn't learn, then she will become the prey herself. We all learn how to control and manipulate as we get older, or we get taken advantage of by opportunists. We don't just need it for relationships, we need it for business and survival too.

    Besides, there is just something about being a girl about that age, finally realizing the power of her sexuality, and how relationships work. She'll figure it out soon enough.

  23. The Following User Says Thank You to KiwiStrawberry Splenda For This Useful Post:


  24. #22
    Member incognito.dancer's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    47
    Thanks
    16
    Thanked 7 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    You "pushed her" into therapy? How long have you been with her? 6 years? Oh wait....that's 6 months......lol

    Sounds like you got major issues and you are living thru her. What you complain about in her and want her to change is really how you feel about yourself. And you seem to need the "therapy". So what if she likes kinky sex. YOU seem to have the problem with it, so if you don't like yourself. Fix yourself. Not her.
    Last edited by Djoser; 11-27-2009 at 09:16 PM.

  25. #23
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by Elvia View Post
    Who said anything about using her pussy or her body?
    "Besides, there is just something about being a girl about that age, finally realizing the power of her sexuality,...

    There's no need to resort to personal attacks in the face of honest advice. You wanted to know what might be going on with your girl and she told you honestly what she thought might be a possibility.
    I didn't get mad at the advice, I got mad at the attitude behind it. Basically "you will be manipulated, if not by her then by someone else, because that's the way the world works and you're just going to have to accept it. Besides, you're an evil man and if she doesn't manipulate you, you'll manipulate her!"

    Again, she made a valid point.
    By calling me a douche for trying to get this girl the help she needs to lead a healthy, happy life?

    It might be a teensy bit inappropriate to "push" someone you have only a short term relationship with into therapy. It should be something they want to do on their own.
    She's always known she needed the therapy and wanted to do it but she wouldn't. She needed a push from somebody. 12 months might not be long to you but it's damn long enough to know that a molestation victim, compulsive liar, and girl who (when I met her) was wearing short skirts with no panties and showing her pussy off to strangers (she doesn't do that anymore) needs therapy. If you ladies can't see that someone like that needs help, then you need it too.

    That being said, I think you should end this relationship and cleanly and nicely as possible. Sounds like it's not good for either of you.
    And thanks for being the only one in the past day to give me any actual advice.

  26. #24
    Member incognito.dancer's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    47
    Thanks
    16
    Thanked 7 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Instead of coming to a forum with dancers, you may want to try www.aftersilence.org. I mean really......

    And then to make us want to "guess" her problem......

  27. The Following User Says Thank You to incognito.dancer For This Useful Post:


  28. #25
    Member
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    23
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Is this girl crazy/bad gf material?

    Quote Originally Posted by incognito.dancer View Post
    I'm sorry for hurting your feelings sweetheart. (lol)

    So let me get this right. Your "GF" was molested by her father and has some issues with that so instead of helping her work through a very tough time you come on forums to blast her and ask if she is nuts?
    Again, passing judgment before you know the facts. I do help her work through it...I've done countless hours of research, bought books, talked to mental health professionals, all in the name of educating myself on the psyche of molestation victims so that I can be there for her and be the one she can open up to. I've blown off friends and re-arranged my own schedule so she can cry on my shoulder and blow her nose with my shirt. I've been there for this girl more than her best friends, but I finally felt it was out of my hands. She needed to get the help. Point blank. But now I'm starting to doubt if she will get better, which is why I came to you guys.
    Last edited by Djoser; 11-27-2009 at 09:28 PM.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Once a good girl goes bad...
    By GlitterBexie in forum Life Support
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-05-2009, 05:17 PM
  2. Crazy Girl's????
    By GAGE MARAVILLA LAZY in forum Club Chat
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 06-21-2007, 05:40 PM
  3. good girl or bad girl
    By tinydncr in forum Newbie Board
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 04-28-2007, 07:40 PM
  4. problems ith another girl at work, am i crazy?
    By kat 3322 in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 09-17-2006, 01:58 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •