I've been dancing for ~3.5 years now and I am DONE with it.Only I can't really be done for another year. Possibly year and a half. I've done the math and put in some time job hunting, and have realised that as much as I've grown to hate it, I do need to stick with dancing until I'm done school. (Please, nothing about low-wage jobs or school loans...I've done the math, and I won't bore you with the details but this is really the only job that will work for me right now, time- and money-wise).
I quit my last club about a month ago cos it was full of drugs, blatant hooking and a steady flow of undercovers--a terrible combination IMHO.I kept thinking that just being there at the wrong time could potentially ruin my entire future and everything I work so hard for, so I left and was off for a month. Now my savings are almost down to nothing, and I need to go audition somewhere else.
But I'm so utterly filled with negativity at the thought of going back to dancing. I need to snap out of it and change my entire mindset. But how? It doesn't help at all that I've just been off since leaving my former club; now I've gotten used to a normal sleep schedule, I've had loads of free time...OK, so part of it is I've just gotten lazy.The other parts are feeling the typical "ugh, they're not going to hire me; I hate auditioning" that I always feel when I go try out for a new club. (I've never not been hired *touch wood*, but every time I think about auditioning for a new club, I always think "this is going to be my first rejection...") And just generally really wanting to leave it all behind me and be done with dancing, but knowing that I can't till next year.
Anyway, enough rambling. How do you turn off all the negativity and just do your job, when you're completely over the whole scene and fed up but need to do it anyway (at least for the time being)? How do you get over the "ugh, not again" feeling and just get on with it?
And it's not just the audition. I need to change my attitude towards the job in general, or else it's only going to bring me more frustration and negativity, night after night (and very little money). A large part of the problem is in 3+ years of dancing, I still haven't quite figured out how to not let people get to me. Customers who play mind games, who try to pry into my life, or insult me; customers who act like perverts, or just complete morons, or cheap asses...I need to figure out how to just brush all that off, and let it all roll off my back. I need to learn how to get into a 'persona' and just stick with it, and kind of put up a wall where all the negativity coming from other people in the club doesn't get close to me.
Any advice on how to do any of that would be very much appreciated!



Only I can't really be done for another year. Possibly year and a half. I've done the math and put in some time job hunting, and have realised that as much as I've grown to hate it, I do need to stick with dancing until I'm done school. (Please, nothing about low-wage jobs or school loans...I've done the math, and I won't bore you with the details but this is really the only job that will work for me right now, time- and money-wise).
I kept thinking that just being there at the wrong time could potentially ruin my entire future and everything I work so hard for, so I left and was off for a month. Now my savings are almost down to nothing, and I need to go audition somewhere else.
The other parts are feeling the typical "ugh, they're not going to hire me; I hate auditioning" that I always feel when I go try out for a new club. (I've never not been hired *touch wood*, but every time I think about auditioning for a new club, I always think "this is going to be my first rejection...") And just generally really wanting to leave it all behind me and be done with dancing, but knowing that I can't till next year.
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