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Thread: Getting Paid for Conversation

  1. #26
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by fast tan77 View Post
    I got lots a friends to hang out with for social interaction and pleasure but I DON"T want to see any of them naked or in a little dance outfit.
    I get this, and I totally enjoy the convo... but, it's just the icing on the cake.... Why wouldn't you enjoy the cake, too?...

    The cake is what draws me to the SC. Once there, I enjoy the icing, but I wouldn't go to the SC just to order the icing without the cake.

    (Okay, this is probably a bad analogy because someone is going to say that they're allergic to the cake, but not the icing... or something like that.)

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Jack,

    I'm pretty sure by now he has moved on from the club and into his independent life. But this was what he wanted at the time he wanted it. Funny thing, my waitress friend who sometimes was our waitress also considered him pathetic for sitting around the club and paying dancers to hang out with him. I didn't.

    Again, I think it was a transitional phase for him. As good as your advice is to him, its not like I can talk to him about it.

    Anyway, that's just one example of a convo regular, I've had a few.

    What about my veteran reg who found it painful to have a girl do a proper lapdance for him, but enjoyed the dynamic of flirting with a sexy young girl? He is (was?) a very well respected member of his community, had a ton of friends, was in a happy marriage...but wanted to flirt with hot strippers. Was he pathetic? A fucking war hero who wanted to capture a bit of his youth again for an hour a week?

  3. #28
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    I get this, and I totally enjoy the convo... but, it's just the icing on the cake.... Why wouldn't you enjoy the cake, too?...

    The cake is what draws me to the SC. Once there, I enjoy the icing, but I wouldn't go to the SC just to order the icing without the cake.

    (Okay, this is probably a bad analogy because someone is going to say that they're allergic to the cake, but not the icing... or something like that.)

    Dood, I wouldn't pay a stripper for convo either. So what. Some guys here won't pay for anything that doesn't end in a tug job. Who cares if these guys specifically want to spend some time with sexy strippers, can't do lapdances, but don't want to waste the strippers time?

    U

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    This is silly.

    Different varieties of customers want and value different things. Not everyone has the same prerogatives.

    And there is my solution after being up for over 24hrs.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    I've spent a lot of time conversing with dancers. I've never really considered paying them for their time because I don't monopolize it. I understand why guys who do monopolize might be expected to pay for it.

    One other thing. As far as the flow of information is concerned, they tell me far more about their personal issues than I tell them about mine. This is probably different from the norm.
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

    If you're in your twenties and aren't a liberal, you have no heart. If you're in you're forties and aren't a conservative, you have no brain - Winston Churchill

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  7. #31
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    I've spent a lot of time conversing with dancers. I've never really considered paying them for their time because I don't monopolize it. I understand why guys who do monopolize might be expected to pay for it.

    One other thing. As far as the flow of information is concerned, they tell me far more about their personal issues than I tell them about mine. This is probably different from the norm.
    Wow, we agree on something. No one has to pay a dancer for conversation. BUT, if we aren't getting paid, there is about a 100% chance that every move we make and everything we say is a calculated hustle...except for with "friends" like Phil or Bem, or other regulars that have a different kind of relationship.

    If I'm sitting and talking to a guy, I will be pushing dances, in my oh-so sneaky ways, then in a more upfront sales pitch. If he doesn't buck up after about 15 minutes, I'm going to excuse myself and do a round. That's just business. SO.....if a guy wants me to chill with him for an hour, have some drinks, relax, and play "sexy therapist who knows a lot of great dirty jokes", then the smart man will pay up.

    If said man has promised to pay for my time, and I've spent an hour sitting and talking with him, and he DOES NOT pay...I will make sure that he will never have a good experience in the club EVER again, because that's a time waster, and he's basically stealing my time. Again, this is for guys who promise many dances, tips for convo, etc...

    I've sat with custies for free on really slow, dead days. Sometimes for longer than I care to admit. I never would ask them to tip me for my time UNLESS they have been grabbing and groping me the entire time whilst refusing to buy dances.

    What's the big fucking deal?

    Also, I think some men don't like to be "teased" without a happy ending. So they go to escorts, or find girls to sex on their own. But they still want to enjoy the dynamic of the club. If they did this with civvie girls, they would always be on their "hustle". Also, I'm sure that when a man is conversing with a civvie woman he doesn't know so well, he's going to censor himself to an extent until he knows her boundaries and comfort level, right?

    Its not a totally relaxing conversation on his side. Well, in the SC, you can pretty much talk about anything without offending most strippers. More so if you are tipping for her time. Obviously, we aren't talking about having buttsex with underage raccoons. But ya know, some topics are "off limits" amongst certain friends in certain settings because people take things personally and get upset: politics, religion, money, sex, etc...

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  9. #32
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by KS_Stevia View Post
    I've sat with custies for free on really slow, dead days. Sometimes for longer than I care to admit. I never would ask them to tip me for my time UNLESS they have been grabbing and groping me the entire time whilst refusing to buy dances.

    What's the big fucking deal?
    Jeez... you're taking this personally... No one is saying you sit with custies for free... You're not doing anything wrong by charging them for your time (whether its for LD or for talking about their mother issues - its still YOUR work time). You're at the SC to make money, just like I'm in the office to make money and I'm going to bill you for talking about to me, whether its about Obama, Paris Hilton or your gay cousin. If you're doing it on my billable time... I'm charging... There are some clients that end up with outrageous "legal" bills because they call or visit too often and spend most of the time discussing irrelevant personal matters. (Sadly, these clients are usually the ones that can least afford it... The wealthy ones get straight to business.)

    My comment is not directed to you, but to the lonely guy who just needs someone to talk to... Paying dancers to be your "friends" is okay for a little while (like in a transition), but then you have to figure out why you're lonely and plan a strategy to improve your social life.

    Now, if a guy has friends and is not "lonely", but likes to chat up dancers every once in a blue moon and understands the economic value of their time, that's okay... I just have trouble understanding why anyone would miss out on the most enjoyable part of the dancer/custie interaction. If a guy doesn't enjoy the "tease," what the hell is he doing in a SC?

    Lastly, the argument that - He would never have the opportunity to chat with a girl as hot as me, in the "real" world - is very insulting and condescending. If he is an older man, he shouldn't be fixated on young girls... I've dated older women and they can be just as exciting, hot and beautiful as young girls, if you just get over the fixation on 20-something girls. If a guy is too much of slob or too out-of-shape to attract beautiful girls, he obviously needs a comprehensive plan for self-improvement.

    Quote Originally Posted by KS_Stevia View Post
    Well, in the SC, you can pretty much talk about anything without offending most strippers. More so if you are tipping for her time.
    That's not true. Dancers can be offended, too. Sometimes, I think they are more sensitive than "regular" people, because of the way they respond to my comments on this forum (which are never intended to be offensive). When I'm at the SC I am polite with the dancers and don't say anything rude or obnoxious that could be offensive to them.
    Last edited by jack0177057; 01-15-2010 at 11:09 AM.

  10. #33
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    I see your point and agree with you, although I wouldn't judge someone giving me money to just hang out and talk. I didn't keep pathetic "I'm in love with you regular." Ever. So I never got them to be me a car or boobies or pay my credit card off. Oh well.

    Also, I don't find most strippers in the clubs particularly interesting and wouldn't pay them for their time...except for when I visit my girlfriends. Then I usually tip them for coming over and get a few dances for my or my SO. But that's just professional courtesy.

    I don't tip strippers I don't know for just coming to the table. I just try to either get to business quickly, or send them off politely.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    As far as the flow of information is concerned, they tell me far more about their personal issues than I tell them about mine. This is probably different from the norm.
    I'd be inclined to agree. I'd also be willing to bet that the guys who want to spend an hour talking about themselves had better be willing to pay...
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    The girls at my clubs know I am there to get dances, and that I tip generously, for dances and on stage. I always figured that my tipping covered whatever sins I may have and never felt a need to pay for convo.

    Hmm, the last time I was at the club a dancer shared her take-out dinner with me... should I have paid her for that? I can tell you it sure was appreciated...

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    Are there really that many sad and lonely guys out there willing to pay a girl just for convo?


    One more time:

    I make most of my money from conversation and hands down, my regulars who have paid for convo are also the most articulate and wealthiest of my regulars. I know for a fact that my highest rolling regular gets laid often and has no problem finding girlfriends for free. None of my paying-for-convos regulars have -ever- fit the "sad and lonely" description.

    I find that the customers who are the cheapest are also the ones that want the "most" for the money. Also, the "lonely losers" are also far more inclined to be the ones who want to talk to you all night for -free-.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot View Post
    The girls at my clubs know I am there to get dances, and that I tip generously, for dances and on stage. I always figured that my tipping covered whatever sins I may have and never felt a need to pay for convo.
    I agree. I buy dances, lots of them, and the girls I go to see know that I am going to. Whether we chat for a few minutes or if it's dead and we hang out for a few hours they know the dances are going to be their compensation.

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot View Post
    Hmm, the last time I was at the club a dancer shared her take-out dinner with me... should I have paid her for that? I can tell you it sure was appreciated...
    I would have. I don't let a dancer pay for anything while she is entertaining me. Both of my current favorite ladies work at clubs that sell food and I usually end up buying them dinner in addition to a drink or two...or three...
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    ^you know. its a good thing my club doesnt serve food. id waste so much time letting guys buy me food, lol.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post

    I make most of my money from conversation and hands down, my regulars who have paid for convo are also the most articulate and wealthiest of my regulars. I know for a fact that my highest rolling regular gets laid often and has no problem finding girlfriends for free. None of my paying-for-convos regulars have -ever- fit the "sad and lonely" description.
    Just for clarification - these guys don't buy any dances from you?... They go to the SC solely to chat with you?

    Pretty_Penny, I've seen your pics. I would love to chat with you at the club, but there is no way I'd pass up the opportunity to also buy some dances. If I went to see you at the club, my main purpose would be to buy dances from you, the interesting convo would just be the icing on the cake.

    The guy that doesn't buy dances is either not turned on by the dancers, is uptight or is morally "superior"... He's not a horny bastard like the rest of us that go for the LDs... (but nor is he a cheapo like the ones that just go to stare at the stage dances and don't spend any money)... So he's a different animal altogether... Not there for the sexual thrill, but only for companionship and convo... A guy can be lonely even if he is successful, wealthy and articulate.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by KS_Stevia View Post
    I was thinking of all the chuckling, sarcasm, and disbelief that you custies always have over SW pinkies who claim to make a significant portion of their money from conversation with customers.

    Let's see, what percentage of the world's strippers come onto SW and post, 1%?

    Out of those how many girls actively converse with customers, here and on the Blue side, twenty or so? And how many of those girls claim to get decent income from conversation? 5? 6?


    Gentlemen, this is not a statistically significant sample of strippers! You can't assume that most strippers make their income from conversation. You also can't assume these girls are lying either, because it does, in fact happen, all the time. And why would a stripper lie about this? Sometimes convo custies are GREAT EASY money. Wouldn't you be happy to have an easy customer in your line of business? And other times, those customers can be just as needy and annoying too, requiring a very clever girl to keep their interest in that manner. Believe me, sometimes its much EASIER just to grind away. Either way, its work, and there is a market for it.

    Hell, I worked at a club in Europe where there was no stage tipping, and 90% of our commissions came from upselling liquor and chatting up the custies. Lapdances were very uncommon. It does happen. Its not the norm in english speaking countries, but its not completely rare.

    So, next time you chide a Pinkie for making money off of conversation, think about it a little bit. It used to be the norm in the industry anyway...stage tips, and selling "ladies drinks" while being a hostess. Is it so impossible to believe that there are custies willing to pay equivalent money for conversation, as you do for grinding and BJ's in the dark corner?

    A girl who has a good hustle game, has been dancing a while, and maintains her regulars is bound to get a couple of these guys. Why do they do it, who knows? Who cares. They are getting the entertainment they want to pay for. Please, lay off the ladies about this. Thank you sincerely.
    If you make money that way, good for you. You don't have to be apologetic about it. That said, I don't think most dancers make a lot of money that way. At least not from me

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    If I could pay Clive Owen to sit down and talk to me for 20 minutes, you bet your ass I would. But, he's not my friend, I know he's not my friend, I don't want him to be my friend, I just want to talk to Clive motherfriggin' Owen and I know that his time = money. I have friends, but they're not Clive Owen.

    The arguments against paying a stripper for a conversation really amuse me. It's like those who ask why you'd see a stripper when you could see a hooker - because you WANT to see a STRIPPER.

    So why talk to a stripper? Because you want to talk to a stripper, ahurrdurr.

    There are some things you can only do when talking to a stripper. Stare as hard as you want at some boobs without getting smacked in the face, and talk about work. Bitch about your wife and kids to someone who'll never meet your wife and kids, with a goddamn stripper on your lap. Find out all about the sex industry from a stripper, while having a beer and checking out a pretty lady. Spend enjoyable time with a stripper without getting a lapdance, which you might not enjoy - shock horror, some dudes aren't into them. Try (and fail) to chat up a stripper. The list goes on.

    I can see (and have seen) men wanting to do these things without a big stretch of my imagination.

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  21. #42
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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by gameover View Post
    If you make money that way, good for you. You don't have to be apologetic about it. That said, I don't think most dancers make a lot of money that way. At least not from me
    Oh no, getting paid for convo has probably been, like 1% of my earnings over a decade. Maybe I little more because I did work in that "hostess club." But that was commission for selling drinks, although to sell the drinks, one must keep up the convo with the custies.

    Hard to gauge, but I've never expected it, or asked for it, a few guys just like it. I've only asked to be tipped for convo is the guy wouldn't stop reaching for gropes before a sale OR if he wasted a huge amount of my time with promises to buy dances, then didn't follow through.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    I find it interesting that guys here are judgmental about people who pay to talk to strippers in much the same way that some members of the general public are judgmental about guys who go for lapdances ("What, can't you get laid the normal way?")

    I guess I'm one of the guys who pays for conversation. Some clubs have fairly obvious ways to do this and others don't. A lot of times I end up getting lapdances as a way to compensate her for the time she spent chatting with me. I do enjoy lapdances, but I enjoy them more after a period of flirting and conversation. Last week, I bought a VIP for the rest of the night so that I could be sure that someone I clicked with would remain focused on me and be happy about doing so. I think it was three hours and probably not more than 15 minutes of it was a "lapdance" although there was touching, both the lapdancing and touching were mostly limited by what I wanted. It was insanely fun and I honestly can't remember the last time I laughed so much.

    In a non-strip club setting generally women are not receptive to the same sort of conversation, they are more likely to have something else to do and they are certain to be less beautiful and wearing more clothes.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    ^^ I'm not passing judgment... Just remember that the SC is a place to have some fun, but it should not substitute for having a real social life... Its far easier to pay a dancer to flirt with us than to risk rejection in a non-SC setting, but you can't give up on social interactions. Attractive women in non-SC settings are accessible, if you work on self-improvement (exercise, grooming, learn to tell interesting stories and funny jokes, etc.) and if you can fake confidence...

    Admittedly, if you're an older guy, young 20-something girls may not be too keen on chatting with you... But, maybe you should be directing your attention to attractive women of your generation. There are a lot of hot older women - look at Nicole Kidman, Salma Hayek, Jodie Foster, Michelle Pfeiffer and Christie Brinkley (to name a few).

    Also, I don't understand this point - you can't have the same type of conversation with non-dancers... My conversations with dancers are very mild and polite - Where are you from? How long have you danced? etc..., because I don't know them. On the other hand, my conversations with non-dancers is very explicit because I feel very comfortable with women I've known, for at least a few weeks, and they know what a charming pervert I am. Maybe its a generation thing -- women of my generation (I'm 37) are very open about their sexuality and are not shy when it comes to sex talk.
    Last edited by jack0177057; 01-19-2010 at 07:57 PM.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    ^^ I'm not passing judgment... Just remember that the SC is a place to have some fun, but it should not substitute for having a real social life...

    It does if you are married...
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
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    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    I paid for conversation the other day. There was a small percentage of enjoyment but I didnt come away feeling all that good about myself.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    Just for clarification - these guys don't buy any dances from you?... They go to the SC solely to chat with you?

    Pretty_Penny, I've seen your pics. I would love to chat with you at the club, but there is no way I'd pass up the opportunity to also buy some dances. If I went to see you at the club, my main purpose would be to buy dances from you, the interesting convo would just be the icing on the cake.

    The guy that doesn't buy dances is either not turned on by the dancers, is uptight or is morally "superior"... He's not a horny bastard like the rest of us that go for the LDs... (but nor is he a cheapo like the ones that just go to stare at the stage dances and don't spend any money)... So he's a different animal altogether... Not there for the sexual thrill, but only for companionship and convo... A guy can be lonely even if he is successful, wealthy and articulate.

    Yes. I'm not saying I've never had regulars who buy dances. I have just had more regulars who pay for conversation only and those regulars have tended to be the bigger spenders.

    As for those customers being uptight, thinking they are morally superior, or not being turned on by the dancers.. I assure you none of those is true with any of the regulars I can think of that I have had. I won't go over every one of them, but I'll give you a general idea of some "other" types since apparently this is difficult to grasp...

    Customer A is well known in the community/has a job where he has to maintain a certain public image. So, while he will go to a club and enjoy the company of a dancer, he does not want to be seen coming out of VIP or getting dances.

    Customer B has been happily married for many years. That being said, he likes to go to strip clubs and talk to a dancer/watch her on stage... but he doesn't get dances because he feels it would be crossing the line in his wifes eyes.. and he's ok with that agreement.

    Customer C has shit-tons of money and likes to have multiple dancers sitting with him while he shells out money. It is fun for him and it gives him a certain public image. He doesn't get dances because he doesnt "need" to. He has the money to blow and he likes the reaction of the girls around him. He has no trouble finding dates IRL or "getting laid". It is simply something he does to have a good time.

    Customer D is a much older man who feels "silly" getting dances (partly for mechanical reasons) but still enjoys a young naked woman sitting next to him and pays her to talk with him while she's nude, have some drinks, maybe have dinner, etc.

    Those are just some examples.. but there are customers who talk for a sort of "therapy", customers who like to talk about sex (in detail), etc.

    and as far as this goes

    "A guy can be lonely even if he is successful, wealthy and articulate"

    I agree, but I really don't feel that 90% of the regular "pay-for-convo" guys I've known were lonely. Not even a little bit.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Trying to convince custies who believe no conversation is worth paying for is a lot like trying to convince a person who hates the taste of brussel sprouts that they taste good. Just like you're going to have a group of people that know brussel sprouts aren't for them but accept that there are those who do, you're also going to have a group of people who go, "Ewww, you like brussel sprouts?!? That's so gross!!! What's wrong with you?!"

    I enjoy stages and lap dances as much as the next guy but I also pay for conversation quite regularly. The dancers I participate with in this behavior are those I have previously built a rapport with. Occasionally it's for conversation at my table but more commonly I'll buy dances or a VIP session during which the time is exclusively spent conversing (with tip to follow upon conclusion).

    For some customers, there's more to enjoy in a SC than just boobs... and asses... and legs... and soft, silky hair... and I'm getting carried away. Some customers actually find enjoyment and entertainment in conversing with particular dancers at the club. Speaking for myself, I assure you it's not a replacement for a real social life. To a large extent, it's a momentary escape from my real social life where two people are able to have candid conversations without having to be concerned about judgements or negative reactions from the other party (because ultimately, they don't matter). And the best part is that you can "cut the cord" and leave it at the club as soon as you decide your night is over... no baggage... no ties... To me, this is part of the fun at a SC. Because they are the source of my entertainment, they have obviously provided value to me and I am more than happy to reimburse them for their service.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by Bob_Loblaw View Post
    Trying to convince custies who believe no conversation is worth paying for is a lot like trying to convince a person who hates the taste of brussel sprouts that they taste good. Just like you're going to have a group of people that know brussel sprouts aren't for them but accept that there are those who do, you're also going to have a group of people who go, "Ewww, you like brussel sprouts?!? That's so gross!!! What's wrong with you?!"

    I enjoy stages and lap dances as much as the next guy but I also pay for conversation quite regularly. The dancers I participate with in this behavior are those I have previously built a rapport with. Occasionally it's for conversation at my table but more commonly I'll buy dances or a VIP session during which the time is exclusively spent conversing (with tip to follow upon conclusion).

    For some customers, there's more to enjoy in a SC than just boobs... and asses... and legs... and soft, silky hair... and I'm getting carried away. Some customers actually find enjoyment and entertainment in conversing with particular dancers at the club. Speaking for myself, I assure you it's not a replacement for a real social life. To a large extent, it's a momentary escape from my real social life where two people are able to have candid conversations without having to be concerned about judgements or negative reactions from the other party (because ultimately, they don't matter). And the best part is that you can "cut the cord" and leave it at the club as soon as you decide your night is over... no baggage... no ties... To me, this is part of the fun at a SC. Because they are the source of my entertainment, they have obviously provided value to me and I am more than happy to reimburse them for their service.


    FTR I'm not trying to convince anybody here that they should pay for conversation. I'm just trying to clarify that the running stereotype of customers who do so is, in my experience, incredibly false.

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    Default Re: Getting Paid for Conversation

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    Just remember that the SC is a place to have some fun, but it should not substitute for having a real social life... Its far easier to pay a dancer to flirt with us than to risk rejection in a non-SC setting, but you can't give up on social interactions. Attractive women in non-SC settings are accessible, if you work on self-improvement (exercise, grooming, learn to tell interesting stories and funny jokes, etc.) and if you can fake confidence...
    This whole line of thought demonstrates your skewed perspective. Why would you conclude that I'm somehow deficient in my social life or I need self-improvement from the fact that I enjoy chatting with attractive naked women? I'm not concerned with being rejected, I don't want to have to reject them. If I spend hours chatting up some random in a hotel bar, she is going to get the wrong idea. I'm not available.

    My conversations with dancers are very mild and polite - Where are you from? How long have you danced? etc..., because I don't know them.
    Maybe you need to do some self-improvement on your conversational skills.

    I feel very comfortable with women I've known, for at least a few weeks, and they know what a charming pervert I am. Maybe its a generation thing -- women of my generation (I'm 37) are very open about their sexuality and are not shy when it comes to sex talk.
    I'm in my mid 40s, but it is not generational. I also have great conversations with my friends and my wife's friends, but they aren't with me in "random city" when I've closed the deal and want to have a fun night. Successful conversations in bars are much more rare for me than strip clubs, the girls are hotter and wear less and strippers never get mad when they figure out I'm not putting out.

    Strip clubs are purely a road thing for me. I can't imagine wanting to go to one at home. That's where my "real social life" lives.

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