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Thread: Weight "issues"

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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Weight "issues"

    I guess some women really never -are- happy with their body.

    All my life I've been at the very bottom of the healthy weight range for my height and small frame. I'm just at 5ft7... maybe 5ft6 and 3/4.. and for the majority of my adult life I've wavered between 120 and 125. Through the start and middle of last year though, I was going between 117-121. This made me very upset. I've always been teased for being too thin and so I have a sort of complex about it. For as long as I can remember I've wanted to be "at least" 125 and my "ideal" has been 130.

    Well, as of 2 months ago I weigh right around 130 lbs naked and up to 135 with clothes and heavy boots on. It's really weird.... on one hand I'm like "YAY!!!!!!!!" and on the other I have this odd "how did that happen/what if I continue to grow" feeling.

    One day I'll feel like I still look too skinny, like "oh no, what if I lose it all again?". The next day I'll feel a little chunky (for the first time ever... and please don't get irritated with my saying that). Its as if I've lost the ability to judge my own body. Sometimes I'm not even sure that I look much different... but I know most of my pants don't fit anymore. Granted, they were really tight and I bought them when I was skinnier than I wanted. I notice things are different at work too. Guys now say stuff to me like "that girl is really skinny" while pointing at another dancer. There's also been the lack of (much hated) "do you eat????" comments.

    Anyone else ever go through this? Ever get to an "ideal" weight and then instead of total happiness you were ambivilant? I know I should just stop thinking about it. Maybe I'm just getting used to it.

    ps. I posted recently in the pictures of you thread, in case anyone really wants a visual reference.

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    Veteran Member Camillian's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I wish I wanna be skinny, but no matter what I do, staving, etc, my weight just doesn't seem to budge.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    When I was on the Mirena IUD I gained 15 lbs in 6 months. The good news is I didn't gain any more, the bad news is for 2 years none of it came off, either.

    When I had it removed, I lost 7 lbs within 2 weeks and kept it off. Since then I've lost an additional 3-5 lbs. Dancing's helped, too

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    yes I am thin now and now apparently it is too skinny. But I am convinced if I had breast implants no one would say a word. I will never have skinny legs or ass so it pisses me off. Sorry my ribs show all the time. But I know what you mean about not being able to see yourself properly. One day I think Ive gained it all back and I jump on the scales and I haven't gained a pound. I feel like you can't win with guys anyways all the time they are "that girl is too skinny" "that girl is chunky" blah blah blah. Imagine if we were judging them the same way... bah! They couldn't handle it.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I have absolutely no ability to see my body as it truly is. What I see in the mirror is not realistically possible compared to my stats.

    Sometimes it comes down to just having to take in the 'whole' instead of focusing on parts, in my case.

    A few years ago, I was 205lbs at 5'4". I started losing weight, but I was in complete denial. I was wearing size 16 pants and would just say 'oh they're just a little loose because I haven't put them in the dryer recently.' Somehow I would make all these excuses to still feel fat and unattractive.

    I got down to 150 and bought a bunch of size 11 pants. They fit okay, if not a little big.

    When I got down to 125, I brought two pairs of pants into the dressing room. Size 7 and 9. I went with the 7. Then I realized it was too big and I should have gotten a 5.

    My mind just always assumes I'm bigger than I am and can't deal with what reality is telling me.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I know exactly what ur going through!! Up untill the year and a half, I weighed between 110 and 115(my height is 5'. I wished I could gain weight. Now that I have (131) I want to go back to 115. I feel uncomfortable in my skin. Its nice to know I am not the only one who feels this way.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    My height is 5'8.... not 5(smiley face guy wearing glasses)

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Yes! I nearly killed myself to get in the best shape of my life. Always at the gym and watching every single calorie for perfect nutritional balance. I had timers set on my phone to remind me to eat so that my blood sugar was balanced all through the day. In the gym 6 days a week and constantly monitoring body fat and weight.

    My friends thought I was insane, and I kind of was. But when I got down to 14-15% body fat I felt like the pay off for all the work was really disappointing. I may have had low body fat, but it was all on my upper abs and back. Yuck! Granted, it wasn't very noticeable with that low of a percentage, but I was really unhappy with the results.

    I did learn a valuable lesson from that experience, however. I learned that of you are healthy and on good physical condition but still dissatisfied with your looks, then the problem is perception. Plastic surgery is the only thing that made me feel better about my figure and I was kicking myself for not going that route in the first place.


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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    First of all Penny, I want to say that you really -DO- look amazing. And you have a great butt! Hah!

    But I understand where you're coming from I've been from 200+ to the 130's and I've never really felt happy about the way I look.

    I think people underestimate how hard it is for a girl to be 'naturally skinny' - my best friend was/still is like this and it really hurt her when people said mean comments like "eat a sandwich" or "you must be anorexic"; she really wanted to gain weight. Watching her go through what she did about being too thin, it was the same as what I went through when I was too fat. It's hard on either end of the spectrum.



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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    You know, the more I think about, the more I think my problem is that I've always had this "magic number" in my head. So, it's always been about getting to that number. When I would lose weight from being sick or whatever I'd fret and try to get back where I was and then the "magic number" would always still be looming in front of me.

    Now that I"m there it's like.........."ok.... *looks around*" I don't know what I expected.

    and honestly, in reality I probably don't look much different. I personally think this weight is healthier... but it's funny... when I dropped down to 116 last summer is easily the most randomly approached I ever was by customers.

    I don't think I looked "anorexic" or "sickly" at 120-125, but when I dropped to 116 (I was ill for a few weeks, causing the weight loss) I think I was pushing it (not on purpose of course). But really, guys who come in all the time who'd NEVER talked to me before were approaching me.

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    Veteran Member Camillian's Avatar
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post
    You know, the more I think about, the more I think my problem is that I've always had this "magic number" in my head. So, it's always been about getting to that number. When I would lose weight from being sick or whatever I'd fret and try to get back where I was and then the "magic number" would always still be looming in front of me.

    Now that I"m there it's like.........."ok.... *looks around*" I don't know what I expected.

    and honestly, in reality I probably don't look much different. I personally think this weight is healthier... but it's funny... when I dropped down to 116 last summer is easily the most randomly approached I ever was by customers.

    I don't think I looked "anorexic" or "sickly" at 120-125, but when I dropped to 116 (I was ill for a few weeks, causing the weight loss) I think I was pushing it (not on purpose of course). But really, guys who come in all the time who'd NEVER talked to me before were approaching me.
    I agree, weight isn't really the best way to judge anything. Two gals can weight exactly the same, be the same height and look drastically different.

    I like to go by my tape measure and the way I feel (physically)


    I am sure you look amazing at any of the weights you mention.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I understand completely my ideal in my mind was 125 which I thought was impossible no matter what I did cuz I was between 107-115 all my adult life even lifting weights and drinking protein shakes of 450 cals a can 4cans a day. I actually worked real hard over time to get to what I am now which is 120 5 lbs under what I thought would be my ideal at 5'5" anyhow it's a healthy weight, I have a nice body, I like that I'm not as skinny as I used to be cuz now I'm not str8 up and down.

    However I don't think I want to be 125 anymore and my body is now a solid 120 for over a year now so I know I'm not going to go back to being 115 and I'm really tripping out at the thought I could gain more w/age and I know if i do I wouldn't like it healthy still on a good weight for my frame or not.

    I've never had any weight issues or eating disorders, but if I gained any more I would flip and be hitting the gym like nuts running and changing my diet real fast. Not that I'm anti fat for the rest of the world, but on me I couldn't have it.

    My friends/people/my family all know this about me soo I deal with them all teasin me all the time about getting fat. Really I'm 120, but it gets to me and I deal with that pressure to maintain what I have especially with the girls at work who will notice when I get my period and tell me that I'm bloated cuz they notice and can tell.

    Everyone at work is naked there are bigger girls and thinner 1's who don't get so much as a word if they go up and down as they normally tend to, but I know I'm not allowed to gain a few or lose more then a few without that omg what happened effect. I think I should be happy I made my ideal, but in reaching it I'm like what happens when I gain more if I gain more now that I know i's not as impossible as I once thought it was for me.

    As for being too skinny I don't think I ever was that even the few times when I was told to eat a burger or any of that stuff cuz 107-115 might have been low and I might have been built up and now, but I'm always had a solid frame so I didn't really look sick or weak or anything. I do know a girl who worked with us we used to rag on and used to get a hard time about being too thin, but she was a coke fiend and it was unhealthy how thin she was and it showed something bad. Customers would tell her to go away and then point at a girl they said had a body, t&a, wasn't skin and bones rudely and she would cry about it. We kinda helped her out of that as her friends and now she has a banging bod and she always had a pretty face so quiting the coke was really the 1 time I saw some1 gain healthy weight that did wonders for them and the only too thin I ever really looked down on cuz the whole dried up druggy look is just real ug to me.

    Healthily thin I tend to like, but not as much as healthy with just enough of a bod. Then in my op is ideal banging body and anything over that well becomes to much but I think on different frames and how people carry it makes the ideal range change alot for others. For me 120 is my weight and max on my comfort level even if it's what I am happy with and aimed for.
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Autumn Lily View Post
    When I was on the Mirena IUD I gained 15 lbs in 6 months. The good news is I didn't gain any more, the bad news is for 2 years none of it came off, either.

    When I had it removed, I lost 7 lbs within 2 weeks and kept it off. Since then I've lost an additional 3-5 lbs. Dancing's helped, too
    OMG I am on the mirena now and NOTHING I do will take this damn weight off! Maybe, thats the issue...do you think?

    Enough threadjack... the one time I got to my ideal weight, I was still unhappy with my body. Its hard to judge yourself sometimes. The mirror will play tricks on you.

    And there will always be someone thinner and thicker than you are, so that too is hard to judge by.

    Perhaps the key is to just stop judging altogether?
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    We should all just be happy with the youthful bodies we have before we get old.

    However.....

    Would those of you who mentioned being in the same boat as me (trying to gain weight all your life and then it suddenly happening) mind mentioning how old you were when your weight finally increased?

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    ^I gained a butt load of weight suddenly when I was about 20 - 21. I'm 5'7" and went up to about 140lbs. I was 105lbs for most of high school and ate like a piggy. I had kinda resigned myself to the fact that I was just going to be a thick adult cause I worked out like a mofo and couldn't get it off. Just as suddenly as I went up, I went down to 117lbs at 23 and have fluctuated between 112lbs(current) and 130lbs ever since. Honestly I don't really care that much about weight in a normal world, but in the SC it's taking its toll on me. Some of the crap customers will say is really starting to get to me. Don't they know it is rude?

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    Some of the crap customers will say is really starting to get to me. Don't they know it is rude?
    Honestly?

    Most of the time they just don't care. We're "just some stripper" to many of them.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by HollyK View Post
    I know exactly what ur going through!! Up untill the year and a half, I weighed between 110 and 115(my height is 5'. I wished I could gain weight. Now that I have (131) I want to go back to 115. I feel uncomfortable in my skin. Its nice to know I am not the only one who feels this way.
    Yup. Also 5'8" and I like to be 110-115 and am currently 128 and not. happy. at all. I'm trying to drop 15 lbs- going to do two hours of gym a day til I get it back. I still can wear all my clothe but I see pictures and am all OOOH MEDIOCRITY YOU'RE SLIPPING.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I started gaining weight around the age of 25. I got up to 140 (I am 5'9") and I didn't like it at all. I have lost about 5 lbs and I don't have any baby weight from my twins anymore. I do not like weighing more than 132. I would like to get down to 128, but never lower than 125. I just don't look good any less than that. You can't ever complain about your weight, because some girls will just get mad and say you're already thin, when you don't think you look good. I was "too skinny" all my life and didn't weigh more than 122 until after I had my second child. People always said I was too bony, and my family always had cracks about how thin I was, even though I ate like a cow. I always wanted to gain when I was younger, but now I wouldn't mind being "too thin" again. Unfortunately all the super skinny girls seem to get the best spenders and best quality customers. Men seem to have a thing for tiny women, no matter how much they deny it.
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post
    I guess some women really never -are- happy with their body.

    All my life I've been at the very bottom of the healthy weight range for my height and small frame. I'm just at 5ft7... maybe 5ft6 and 3/4.. and for the majority of my adult life I've wavered between 120 and 125. Through the start and middle of last year though, I was going between 117-121. This made me very upset. I've always been teased for being too thin and so I have a sort of complex about it. For as long as I can remember I've wanted to be "at least" 125 and my "ideal" has been 130.

    Well, as of 2 months ago I weigh right around 130 lbs naked and up to 135 with clothes and heavy boots on. It's really weird.... on one hand I'm like "YAY!!!!!!!!" and on the other I have this odd "how did that happen/what if I continue to grow" feeling.

    One day I'll feel like I still look too skinny, like "oh no, what if I lose it all again?". The next day I'll feel a little chunky (for the first time ever... and please don't get irritated with my saying that). Its as if I've lost the ability to judge my own body. Sometimes I'm not even sure that I look much different... but I know most of my pants don't fit anymore. Granted, they were really tight and I bought them when I was skinnier than I wanted. I notice things are different at work too. Guys now say stuff to me like "that girl is really skinny" while pointing at another dancer. There's also been the lack of (much hated) "do you eat????" comments.

    Anyone else ever go through this? Ever get to an "ideal" weight and then instead of total happiness you were ambivilant? I know I should just stop thinking about it. Maybe I'm just getting used to it.

    ps. I posted recently in the pictures of you thread, in case anyone really wants a visual reference.
    OH Girl!! What I would give to be at your weight!! I'm only 5' 5" and since turning 35, I've never been able to get below 146-8lbs (around 10½ stones). Whilst most guys I know love my 'thick' figure as they call it - for a long, long time I would have just died to get down to where you are.

    I tried all sorts of high fibre diets, high protein diets, Atkins, you name it - I've done it - but my metabolism just won't let me. I eat healthily - very little junk food or fast foods - and I exercise too. I'm just destined to be the way I am.

    I guess it's all down to how we feel inside about ourselves isn't it? Nowadays - I'm a lot happier with being this weight. I think a lot of it came from starting modelling and posting photos online - and guys liking the photos. That was a huge 'buzz', so now I don't beat myself up anywhere near as much as I used to.

    My husband has never been a critic of my weight either, which is a big bonus - and all this has made me feel a lot happier inside now.

    This is me BTW:

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Hi

    Sometimes an inability to lose weight can be caused by a food allergy. I was overweight (and couldn't shift it) until I cut gluten and dairy out of my diet. Then the weight fell off, I lost 3 stone (42 pounds) in 3 months without trying. If I eat anything containing these foods I puff up immediately. Water retention is a lot harder to lose than fat.

    V

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post
    Honestly?

    Most of the time they just don't care. We're "just some stripper" to many of them.
    I know. It is quite shocking. I mean I have danced for probably about 18 months if you add it together and I seem to suddenly notice it more now. I'm just like dude... men are seriously c*nts. Thank god I am already married cause I think Id become a lesbian after hearing all their BS. It's seriously giving me a huge headache.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Paris View Post
    Plastic surgery is the only thing that made me feel better about my figure and I was kicking myself for not going that route in the first place.
    I'm like this, there's a couple parts of my body that i hate hate hate, and they stay the same no matter how much I gain or lose. They get smaller if I lose weight but I am still the same overall shape. In a couple years I am planning to have a breast reduction via lipo and I am going to get them sucked out too.

    When I was a skinny teenager at 130-135 (I have a large frame for 5'6"-I was a size 5-7 at that weight) I hated it, felt like a weakling all the time because I didn't do any sports and had no muscle mass. My parents used to make comments about me being too skinny and probably anorexic, and I would tell them that I would rather be 150 and muscular but I couldn't help it. Around 20-21 I filled out a lot, partly from BC I was on at the time but mostly from being more athletic and from my hips growing into their adult shape (I have a huge pelvis) and ended up in the 155-160 range. I know it is mostly muscle and healthy fat, but now I hate myself for being so heavy! WTF. Dancing doesn't help either, because it makes me put on muscle like crazy especially in my legs/abs. When I first started I went up to 165 like, within the first three weeks, and I know it was all in my legs because everyone told me I had gotten skinnier. But I know that the number pretty much puts me outside the "normal" range of healthy weights and that bothers me. Some days I seriously feel like I weigh 185, and will sit in my college classes comparing myself to all the girls and telling myself that I am probably comparable to the chunky ones.

    I am actually working on losing weight quite successfully for the first time since I was a teenager (Thank you heat yoga!) and am telling myself that my goal is 145...but I will bet money that once I get down that far I will be like, "Where'd my ghetto booty go? I'm a skinny freak now and I hate myself!"

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    I can relate. When I was club dancing I was around 125-135 pounds (I am the same height as the OP) and often felt "fat". I knew in general I was thin by average society, but "heavy" by stripping standards. My weight was mostly because I am very muscular, especially in arms and legs and felt funny at times. As we all know, male customers aren't always the nicest guys either when it comes to this. I tried to slim down to 115 pounds to get into the upscale clubs and realized I looked like a stick. I look back and wonder why I ever thought 125-135 was "fat". It's not. I struggled for years to workout all day to be thin and in reality I ended up "heavier" because I gained weight through muscles. Weight number means nothing because you could have two women that are the same height and weight, and one might be in shape and the other is not.

    Then when I was around 30 or so I noticed my metabolism slowed and I got heavier. I'm not obese or anything like that, but my dress size went from a 6 to a 10 or even 12. The funny thing is I don't care anymore. If I had gotten this heavy while dancing I would have cringed. I'm not planning to go back to club dancing anyway so it doesn't matter. Now I workout to stay healthy and not to be thin. As long as I don't get obese I am fine with this.

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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post
    We should all just be happy with the youthful bodies we have before we get old.

    However.....

    Would those of you who mentioned being in the same boat as me (trying to gain weight all your life and then it suddenly happening) mind mentioning how old you were when your weight finally increased?
    107 16 till 21 (32-26-34)
    117 till 28 bought boobs to ven things up (36-28-36)
    120 now at 32
    still (36- 28- 36 but really wish I was 36 - 24 - 36) but I never had a 24 waist closest was way younger and that was 26

    I'm not sure what my body fat index is anymore but it used to be 8% and now I'm sure it's not as low

    It not much change, and now I'm closest to my ideal still I don't like that I could start gaining more which naturally happens to most people, but I don't like the possibility that it could to me. It's the 1st time in my life I ever thought I might be close to having to quit the junk food or that I might have to up the workout which is something I'm feeling alot more then I did before not badly, but still I used to take my figure much more for granted back then.
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    Default Re: Weight "issues"

    ^your "now" measurements are very close to mine. Mine are 36 27 38 (I have always had "junk in the trunk" even at my thinnest).

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