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Thread: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

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    Default The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Is it true? I'm thinking of my old fave, we've been friends-only for 2 years now. Before then, when I used to go see her, she would talk about graduating college, getting a paralegal job, or going to law school, and her excitement and fear of making the transition to post-college and post-stripping life. She always said she didn't want to be a "career stripper" and would hate herself if she did.

    Fast-forward 2 years...the only thing that's happened is she has graduated. No other job. No law school. And I've noticed, of the friends she talks about going out with, the ones talking back and forth with her on FB, they are becoming more and more just those from the club only. It's like her life has gone from 30% club, with her hopes it would soon be 0%, to 90% club, with no prospects of transitioning in the near future, in the 2 years after college.

    Is transitioning really that hard? It seems like she's slipping into this life she didn't want. Of course, nothing I can do about it, but still worries me a little.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Yes, because it's convenient. I still go in when I am called in.

    For me it's like having an abusive boyfriend. He beats you up, you leave, he tells you he loves you, and you go back. I actually wrote about it in the following excerpt:

    "Dear work;

    You remind me of an abusive boyfriend. You beat me and beat me and wring me out to dry; then we have a few good nights, you tell me you love me, and I'm in your arms again.

    You ask me to wear that $350 silk dress that was given to me in Las Vegas; everyone tells me I look beautiful.

    I want to tell them "I know", because I do, or I wouldn't be with you. I look in your mirrors and watch my brightbrightbright hair flow around my alabaster shoulders and go 'Hm, maybe the diet I was going to go on was stupid.'

    You plague me with stress and nightmares, work. You fill me with the fear of going back into The Real World. You make me doubt my ability to be a Real Girl instead of a Fantasy Girl, and when I protest I can be you fill my garter with $20s and say

    Come on you were made for this.

    I wasn't. I was made to be a doctor, work.

    We're breaking up in six weeks.

    Respectfully,

    Catherine V."

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    I've known many who have left the life, including myself. It's all a matter of many circumstances. For instance, are you using the money to better yourself or blowing it? I used much of it to go to school. During my latter years of club dancing I had another job on the side (radio, then later pr) because I knew it was coming to an end. I also started an entertainment business because I knew eventually I couldn't dance anymore. I refused to be one of those dancers who should have retired and still struggle. While the business failed (too much competition) at least I took a chance and developed other business senses (I am working on starting another business, nondancing related).

    The problem is that many dancers only think in the here and now and many have no other skills. Plus as they get older, and they have no "real world" job experience they are in big trouble and will likely have to take a job that pays much less. I feel for the dancers who got mixed up in the life, didn't save or develop other skills, then find they are older, not making much money anymore, and no skills.

    Incidentally, I worked with many dancers who had the same mindset as me. Many had other jobs (one was a nurse, another a lawyer), others were in school and danced to pay their way, etc. I wish all were like these.

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    Veteran Member Camillian's Avatar
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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Graduating is a big deal, a great accomplishment. Unfortunately, the economy is so f-ed that many people can not find good/reasonable work, degree or not.

    Is the transition really that hard? Yes, it is.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    ^^^ Even if the economy weren't so f-ed up,... few jobs will pay the kind of money that a dancer makes. Lawyers fresh out of law school don't make that kind of money. If you're accustomed to a certain high income stream, it's hard to get by on 1/4 of that... even worse is that fact that you'll have to work twice as hard to make that 1/4 of the dancer income you are accustomed to.

    I'm sort of in a similar situation. I want to make a career change, but I will have to adjust to a very significant reduction in my income stream, so I'm putting it off for a year or two.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Lawyers out of law school don't make $8k a month?

    Granted back in the day I was rocking out far more, but that was my most recent income from steady dancing.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    This plumber goes to a house to fix a faucet and a woman answers the door and directs him to the kitchen sink, After about 20 minutes of work, he says to the woman "Ok its fixed, and that will be $300" The woman says "That's crazy, my doctor charges less than that" The Plumber says "I know, I used to be a doctor"

    Not sure about plumbers during the recession, however with the major professioins, the ones that usually require big loans, earnings are pretty much way off, complete wholesale changes in pay scales ofen times, This goes for lawyers, doctors, pilots, all over the place. The first two nearly always having 100k loans, the 3rd often 9 yrs of military experience.

    Dancers on a relative basis for those treating it very seriously and putting up with the bullshit. and lets assume we are talking about non-college grads which of course many are, they avoid the whole college loan thing, plus compared to lawyers its post high school 7 yrs of school and with doctors, what 9 to 12 yrs or more total?

    I've seen young foreign strippers really focused on the job who have made very high incomes, and it will match many professions in their initial stages,, and that's not even taking into account the variances on the tax issue. Ok its bad now for many, I know, but that's the way it is all over the USA.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    What we are really talking about here is the job of stripping, not "the life".

    I have two favs in their 30's who both have college degrees from very good schools in very practical fields. Both still dance and neither talks about quiting soon. The money dancing is just too good compared to what's out there. That being said, they also both have very normal lives after they leave their respective clubs at the end of their shifts.

    As far as what "the life" is...well, in most cases that is just a stereotype.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Quote Originally Posted by mediocrity View Post
    Lawyers out of law school don't make $8k a month?
    Silk stocking wall street law firms or big law firms in a major metropolitan area -- yes, more that that (if you went to a prestigious law school, were in the top 10% of your class, a member of law review, and were lucky to find such a job in this economy).

    Average law school grad... no.

    http://www.payscale.com/research/US/..._Lawyer/Salary
    Last edited by jack0177057; 02-18-2010 at 09:26 AM.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    What we are really talking about here is the job of stripping, not "the life".

    I have two favs in their 30's who both have college degrees from very good schools in very practical fields. Both still dance and neither talks about quiting soon. The money dancing is just too good compared to what's out there. That being said, they also both have very normal lives after they leave their respective clubs at the end of their shifts.

    As far as what "the life" is...well, in most cases that is just a stereotype.
    Yoda, I'm not referring to the stereotyped "stripper life", I'm referring to her life. In 2 years, all these things have changed (or not, as the case may be):

    - still there, when she didn't want to be

    - no regular job, when she said she wanted one

    - more heavy drinking (but no drugs that I know of)

    - socializing almost exclusively with strip-club people now, where before it was almost exclusively the other way

    - no "hiding" that she's a stripper now (except from her dad) -- it's clear on her facebook and the way she lives her life. Before, she was very careful about who knew.

    All this adds up, with a girl in her mid-20s, she's a full-blown stripper now, not just "stripping her way through college" (another stereotype).

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    ...yes, transitioning is hard (for her too). If its going to happen, i may take time and the time thats right for her under under her own circumstances/terms (and probably a time not in a recession as Yoda & Camillian say). I could tell ya a story about a pot smoking hippy chick who became a computer programmer for the government & passes security checks and it did not happen in two years.
    "Peter, did you take Stewie to a strip-club? He smells like sweat and fear." - Lois and Stewie (Family Guy) ... "Through early morning fog I see, Visions of the things to be, The pains that are withheld for me, I realize and I can see..."

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Transitioning out of the strip club life is very hard, and not just for the strippers, but for the male employees, too. It is a culture in itself and the people who are attracted to the business are there because the culture suits them.

    Leaving the business is HARD. It is probably as hard as joining the army or moving to a foreign country (emotionally). So not only does she have to face a loss of income, but also a loss of power. Culture shock is something that strippers have to deal with when they leave.

    The worst part is that discussing your previous work experience is forbidden. This prevents the building of friendships in the new environment and makes it difficult to establish any kind of rapport within the new work place.

    So, yes, it's hard. Probably a good parallel would be people who have recently served time in prison trying to fit in to a new corporate culture.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    ^^^ Even if the economy weren't so f-ed up,... few jobs will pay the kind of money that a dancer makes. Lawyers fresh out of law school don't make that kind of money. If you're accustomed to a certain high income stream, it's hard to get by on 1/4 of that... even worse is that fact that you'll have to work twice as hard to make that 1/4 of the dancer income you are accustomed to.

    I'm sort of in a similar situation. I want to make a career change, but I will have to adjust to a very significant reduction in my income stream, so I'm putting it off for a year or two.
    I will admit I don't make what I did dancing, but on the other hand it's stable money. I know when I go to work I'll make money. I also know that it won't matter whether I gained weight or look terrible that day. I also know that while I probably won't have to deal with sexual harassment like in the clubs, I will deal with another form of it (discrimination).

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Other people have pointed out what I was going to. The economy is bad right now. I'm working more than ever right now and I really thought I'd only work 6 months - one year and then not strip anymore. I don't really care either. Stripping is bringing in consistent money and my life is very much less stressful now than a month ago when bills were piling up and I was feeling anxious all the time. That why I'm back and working a lot.

    The drinking things is not good though. A constant party is not good. I'm not sure what to advise you to do though .

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Quote Originally Posted by Everyman View Post
    Yoda, I'm not referring to the stereotyped "stripper life", I'm referring to her life.
    Well then I humbly suggest that you shouldn't have used the words "The Life" in the title of your post. It's far too ambiguous a term for what you intended the focus of your post to be.
    Last edited by yoda57us; 02-18-2010 at 05:12 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Quote Originally Posted by Everyman View Post
    Yoda, I'm not referring to the stereotyped "stripper life", I'm referring to her life. In 2 years, all these things have changed (or not, as the case may be):

    - still there, when she didn't want to be

    - no regular job, when she said she wanted one

    - more heavy drinking (but no drugs that I know of)

    - socializing almost exclusively with strip-club people now, where before it was almost exclusively the other way

    - no "hiding" that she's a stripper now (except from her dad) -- it's clear on her facebook and the way she lives her life. Before, she was very careful about who knew.

    All this adds up, with a girl in her mid-20s, she's a full-blown stripper now, not just "stripping her way through college" (another stereotype).
    Ya seriously, so what dude? Why are you so involved with her life anyway? So what if she wants to have some fun and figure out who she is and not be rushed into a life she doesn't really want? She's only in her 20's, I'm sure she'll figure things out.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Yeah, maybe she realized that she's okay with dancing longer than she initially anticipated. I don't see the problem in her associating with her current coworkers and deciding to continue dancing if she's happy with it. Lots of people have dreams about going to school and getting a great job with their degree, and this often does not happen.

    If she is working, making money, and has friends she enjoys, why is it so different than if she was working in a paralegal job, and associating with lawyer friends? (Other than fitting into mainstream society's idea of what a "nice" young girl should be doing.)

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Easy to quit, I've done it many times, but never told myself it was for good. But, also so easy to come back!

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    If I quit dancing and work as a lawyer straight out of school I will get approx $50k p/a for 5 days a week, averaging 8-10 hours a day.

    I work 2-3 nights a week as a dancer and I make more than twice that and I have all the time in the world to go to the gym and whatever else I feel like doing.

    To answer you're question yes giving this up will be exceptionally hard but not because I don't have any other options, because this gig is just too good and suits my lifestyle so well.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    Featured Member Stripper Hacks's Avatar
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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    It's extra easy to get out of the stripper life but really why would you want to even with a degree?

    Seriously I have hopes and dreams and always tell others to keep your dreams.

    When I'm able to make more money than I do dancing I do it. When I'm not able to I dance.

    I'm not interested in a job. To me that is a last resort. Degree or not.

    If I had a law degree and was still young I'd dance as long as possible then go practice law when I didn't want to dance anymore.

    The world is tough for women regardless of degrees. The world is tough for MEN WITH DEGREES.

    Personally make that money while you can and get the experience you need to take your dreams to the next level. Then a dancer can decide if she is ready to quit or not.

    It's the same with any other job. You go to work to pay the bills and work on your own stuff in between those days.




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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    The real world is boring and sucks a lot. So yes it is hard. The SC sucks sometimes too but other times it is freaking awesome. Its largely the time spent outside the club that is the allure too. You have tons of time and tons of disposable income to go with it.

    I started classes last week for my exit and I couldn't get over how boring people in the real world are. Seriously. Can't you have a conversation? A laugh? Give me something people!

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    ^^^
    while this is true, recently on my professional placement (I had to work at a law firm for 3 weeks) it was so refreshing to be around men and be talking about normal things that were not sexual in nature. It was also nice to be around intelligent people.

    Sometimes I just get so over talking about sex and having to humour someone's sick shit.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    ^hahaha one of my best friends is a lawyer. If you were at her firm whilst she would be completely appropriate and professional, she is really imagining what your breasts look like covered in cum. I'm not joking. She says shit like this all the time. Those boys are just being well behaved cause they have to.

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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    Oh I know that but it's nice that they have to restrain themselves. I have become accustomed to men telling me how hard their erection is, or that they are going to the toilet to rub one out, or that they would eat my pussy for hours. It was very nice to have a break from that. I am so comfortable with nudity and giving sensual lap dances but one thing I have never felt comfortable with is men talking to me like that. I don't like it and I wish I could call them out on it.

    I love men who are really polite and old fashioned in the way they relate to women. The other night a guy swore in front of me and he looked startled and started apologising and saying he forgot there was a woman present and he felt bad. This is so uncommon these days. I'll just never think it appropriate to talk so dirty to a woman - unless it's your partner/girlfriend in a bedroom situation.
    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan View Post
    when regulars turn cheap, it's time to kill em off.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lysondra View Post
    You're still a vagina.
    There are many stereotypes about the industry that I work in. Sometimes they can be true but human beings are very diverse creatures and cannot be pigeon-holed into one category.

    Some of the most effortlessly beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, motivated, driven and ridiculously hilarious women that I have ever met have been dancers. I've met the best friends that I've ever had in this industry.

  27. #25
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    Default Re: The stereotype that it's hard to get out of the life

    I left stripping for a long time-super easy, but still daydreamed about stripping and all the money I'd be making and all the free time I lost.

    However, I did not make as much as Jazaine. The earning potential where I live is less, but still about 15grand less/year than what I am making now, with about 20 hours less/week of work and MUCH less stress.

    That is what makes it hard-loss of money with more hours of work, and people are more uptight outside of the club.
    "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories -Stainslaw J. Lec

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