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Thread: Mr.Unzipped Pants

  1. #1
    Member sunnyb's Avatar
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    Default Mr.Unzipped Pants

    So today was my first day! I was super nervous and almost fell off the stage twice. My legs are so sore, I'm about to die. I made decent money for only working 3 hours. But I have a funny story to share...

    There was this old old old mexican guy who probably didn't speak a word of english.. He was sitting at the tip rail while I was onstage. (I didn't even know what I was doing up there. Just moving around really slow, probably did the same move about 40 billion times because I don't know any pole tricks and I decided to be sober) He kept making kissing noises at me. I continued my ridiculous dancing and fumbling with my bra and tripping over my shoes and then finally the torture was over.. I get off stage and he asks me for a dance.. I was like.. "Um.. Let me talk to my manager". Lol I was so nervous I didn't even want to say yes. I was like, they didn't train me in giving lap dances yet so wtf am I supposed to do with this guy? My manager was like, take him to one of the booths, and you'll figure something out. Just take his money first.

    So I took his 20 bucks and put it in my little box thing and then set it down and I'm about to sit on his lap to start my dance when the security guard pushes me out of the way and starts yelling at the guy. I turn around and his pants are totally unbuttoned and unzipped and I guess he did this while I was fumbling around with 20 dollars wondering why someone would give that to me to dance one song for them.. (I have a lot to learn, I know). And this guy is sitting here acting like he had no idea his pants were undone. It made me laugh so hard, he was like this 90 year old man with arthritis who didn't speak a word of English, pullin such a stunt on poor little me!

    The security guard said I have to always look before I sit. Lesson learned. I just couldn't stop laughing at this guy for trying that. What a sneaky ol perv! Lol. So I ended up giving him 3 lapdances (after he zipped up) and I swear from the things he was saying and the way he was breathing, I think I almost put him into cardiac arrest. I had to stop after 3, he was trying to lick my face and eat my hair. It was so funny but I was getting grossed out.

    I don't know if I'm meant for this business because I found too many things funny today and I am sooooo clumsy it's unreal. Plus I don't like to drink. Blah I'm lame. Just thought this old guy was amusing. Apparently he is a regular so hopefully he will be back so I can witness more of his antics.
    No pressure, no diamonds.

  2. #2
    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    Not all the clients are like that... there's actually very few. However, they will try odder things that licking you.

    Congrats on finishing your first day!
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    Not at night...that's when the stars have rather better things to do. They're coming out, shining, that sort of thing.
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  3. #3
    God/dess ViolaStrings's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    Wow, funny.

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    Featured Member pussyinboots's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    That is genuinely funny! (Don't worry about the not drinking BTW..)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "Good Girls keep diaries....Bad Girls don't have the time..!!"

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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    You're new so that means that you are a target for the customers who don't like being played by the more experienced dancers.

    Like Kylea2 said not all customers are like that you just got lucky.

    If you continue to dance be aware that some regulars might try to pull a fast one on you.

    This customer was just out right silly and even though he was an elderly gentleman just think how he was as a youngin'.

    I'm glad you took his money.




  6. #6
    Member sunnyb's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    Thanks, girls. Yeah I was told that because I'm new, I'm gonna be making a lot of "new girl money" but with that comes the regulars trying to see what they can get away with. I was continuously told by the girls to not do anything I don't feel comfortable with. Ever. Like they drilled it into my brain. I understand. I think my club seems pretty clean (for the most part) and they don't want their reputation to change.

    Another funny thing was that when I was done with my first 3 songs on stage, I felt like such a freakin idiot that I got dressed and ran off and forgot about collecting my money. Before I went up, I was like, "Psh.. I'm hot shit, piece of cake". And then I get up there... And almost fell on the slippery floor... And EVERYONE was staring at me since the DJ announced it was my first time... Longest 9 minutes of my entire life. Haha I ran off and the girls were like, "Are you working for free? Go get your money!". I was like oh yeah and ran up there like a fucking idiot to get it. Ugh I'm so dumb. I hope I learn. Lol. I'm glad I work with SOME nice girls because they made me feel like less of a douche.
    No pressure, no diamonds.

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    God/dess CKXXX's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    Between the girls reminding you to get your money and the security guard stepping up, it sounds like you are in a good club! You are lucky...few clubs are that good nowadays,esp to new girls! Congrats on starting at a safe club!

    And yes...always pay attention to everything when you are in the club. You'd be surprised how quick some guys can whip it out, or put their hands or fingers, etc...where they shouldnt.

    Good luck!

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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    haha, this happened to me once and he was very obvious and open about it. i was like "uh what do you think you're doing?" then he proceeded to beg for a hand job. not to scare you anything, there's respectful custies out there too

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    God/dess DesuvsDeath's Avatar
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    Default Re: Mr.Unzipped Pants

    I love when they're like "Omg! I have no idea how that happened!" Looking around like someone must've reached around them and unzipped their pants.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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