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Thread: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

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    Featured Member Fawn's Avatar
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    Default OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    We've got an "Over heard in the dressing room" thread, but what about things you yourself have said?

    Once, when my eyes were misbehaving, and I had to wear my glasses-which had a 4 year old prescription, I noticed some old guy who looked incredibly like my dad (in my screwed up vision). I had several big spending customers in, so I wasn't about to run and hide. I kept trying to sneak closer and closer to see if it was really him. It looked sooo much like him.

    I realized he was staring at me. At this point, staring me down pretty much. So, I thought "Ok, I'm busted, might as well get this over with now." And I walked straight up to him.

    It wasn't my dad. Just after this guy pulls me down onto his lap and is talking about getting some dances, I go "Oh my god, I thought you were my dad. You look JUST like him!" He was there with several of his friends. They all busted out laughing, one choking on his drink. He then said "just what every guy wants to hear," and just looked really embarrassed. He proceeded to try to be nice when he obviously felt very awkward until I got up to leave the table. When I was leaving he said "you ruined it for me, you know?" I knew.
    Last edited by Fawn; 04-01-2010 at 11:12 PM.
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    Veteran Member AdventureBaby's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    ROFLMAO

    OMG I loooooove your story! I'm still laughing my ass off and can't think of the dumbest thing I've said ... to be continued ...

    BTW ... thanks for the good laugh ... I had one of those crying nights and needed something to lift my spirits. Thanks sweetie!

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    Senior Member Luna Louise's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    once I told this guy that he looked exactly like David Spade (since he did) and he was like "that's not a compliment" and I was like "oh, shit. i guess not" and walked away. There is no coming back from one of those.

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    Featured Member *Jade*Love's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Quote Originally Posted by Luna Louise View Post
    once I told this guy that he looked exactly like David Spade (since he did) and he was like "that's not a compliment" and I was like "oh, shit. i guess not" and walked away. There is no coming back from one of those.
    Hahaha I got myself into the exact same situation except I said Steve Carell! I think he's hilarious so I didn't realize the guy was going to take offense to it, but.... yeah, he did.

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    I telling a couple customers that I used to drink in the cooler at my first job, because there were always places that had no cameras (entirely fabricated story). My boss walked by and only heard me say, "you know, there's always a place with no cameras!" She didn't say anything about it, but it got an eyebrow raise.

    Earlier tonight, I was collecting stage tips and was just about to get backstage when a high spender pulled me aside to tip me. Turned out I had walked right by him. To cover it up, I said, "I'm sorry, I almost forgot you were here!" He wasn't so generous after that.

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Also, there was a time when I introduced myself with the customer's name.

    "Hi, what's your name?" "Ben." "I'm Ben! I mean, hi Ben... I'm not Ben... but you... are?"

    His reaction was so awkward and I was so sad to lose business with a big tipper that I went into the dressing room and cried, occasionally telling girls that they could call me Ben. I introduced myself as Ben again the next time I saw him and he wound up taking several dances.

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    Moderator Jessie_tinydancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    I say stupid shit all the time... I can't remember any of it though because I try to block it out.

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    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Stupidest thing I've said recently that MADE me money:

    Recent response to a customer's, "How are you?"

    "I've spent nearly all day puking, so not that great!"

    Actually turned out well. He wanted to hear more and gave me $200 after we did maybe 6 dances (dances are $15/song). I wouldn't normally recommend such a cavalier, unprofessional response but I was still VERY under the weather from eating greasy fast food after the previous night's shift at work and having suffered endless bouts of ..ick....



    Dumbest thing I ever said that COST me money:

    Relatively new to stripping, was working an odd day shift and saw a customer who I misjudged and was snippy towards for saying he wanted to settle in more before dancing.

    I said somethng akin to, " What are you waiting for? It's day shift..it's not going to get any better than this" while rolling my eyes. Stupid, Stupid. Stupid!

    I sulked away and he, without much ado, spent hundreds of dollars on every OTHER girl who was there on the day shift..like, EVERYONE but me. It was his informal 'divorce party' he was celebrating and he wanted to spoil all the dancers on the shift.I learned a very valuable lesson that day! Turns out he was a very nice guy and all the girls had nothing but nice things to say about him. Whoops!
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    Veteran Member sugartaste's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Not a really stupid thing to say in or of itself, but a few years ago I spent about 5 minutes chatting with a guy (beginning of the night), and when I asked him if he wanted a dance, he told me it was actually his first night working as a bouncer at the club. Eep! The bouncers there didn't wear staff shirts or anything, so it definitely wasn't obvious that he was an employee. Still, I felt really stupid!
    Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    when i first danced in texas i used the name Lucy, and i had to stop when i found myself saying "my name's lucy. like i love lucy? cause you'll be saying that after a few of my dances"

    >.<
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Quote Originally Posted by lol1337a View Post
    Also, there was a time when I introduced myself with the customer's name.

    "Hi, what's your name?" "Ben." "I'm Ben! I mean, hi Ben... I'm not Ben... but you... are?"

    His reaction was so awkward and I was so sad to lose business with a big tipper that I went into the dressing room and cried, occasionally telling girls that they could call me Ben. I introduced myself as Ben again the next time I saw him and he wound up taking several dances.

    this is the weirdest shit i've ever read. oh my god, my sides hurt from laughing so hard.

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    ^ I know, right. I love it.

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Hey, "I'm" almost rhymes with "hi."

    I went to Denny's afterward and they had mad libs on the placemat, so we filled every space with "Ben." "I Benned with my Ben friend Ben and we saw a Ben Ben walking down the Ben and then we Benned and found a Ben..."
    Last edited by lol1337a; 04-09-2010 at 12:31 AM.

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    the club was really dead, and there was only one guy sitting at my tip rail who had sort of a fucked up eye. i did a handstand in his lap and then i asked him how he liked that cause he seemed really unresponsive.

    me: did you like that?
    *customer doesn't say anything*
    *i feel awkward so i ask again*
    me: was that cool? i thought it looked cool
    *customer doesn't say anything still*
    me: alright...
    customer: gosh, HOW COULD YOU NOT NOTICE THAT?
    me: what?
    customer: i was winking at you the whole time
    me: oh...

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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    asked a customer sitting at the bar what on earth was on his head (i could only see his back). he turned around and glared at me.... with one eye. it was an eypatch. oops.

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    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: OK, so what is the dumbest thing YOU'VE said in a strip club?

    Rainflydragon,
    That made me laugh out loud...while my sweetie is sleeping..(it's nearly 3am)...That's so terrible! Aww..*hugs*
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