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Thread: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

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    Veteran Member AdventureBaby's Avatar
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    Default Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Here's the scenario ...

    > Custy you just met ... out-of-town businessman.
    > Spends a lot of $$ ... a lot is a relative term, so it's what you feel is a lot.
    > He was respectful and nice ... and you had a good flowing conversation.
    > He asks you out to dinner.


    My questions ...

    1) Do you go out to dinner? For free or a fee?

    2) Does the custy end up feeling like now he's your friend and to respect you he won't go back to the club?


    I've always kept business in-house ... I'm a dancer therefore I dance at the club. I don't know if it's Vegas or it's my perception, but I get a lot of out-of-town businessmen telling me they wish there were in town longer so we could go out to dinner. Fortunately since they're always leaving the next day I've never had to come up w/ a reply ... I just smile. But I have a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach soon a custy will not be leaving the next day and ask me out to dinner. Curious how other dancers handle situations like this so it doesn't affect your $$ in a negative way?

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Hi A.B.,

    In my own experience, I've always worked in clubs (3 total) which had an in-house, nice restaurant so it's easy to tell men who want to have dinner, "Great, I would love to come in a little early and meet you. The tuna tartar is my favorite!" or something like that.

    However, if your club doesn't, maybe you still have a couple of options:
    1) Is there a nice restaurant very close to your club that you could meet him at, enjoy dinner (but keep it under two hours). When you make the arrangements, make a point of saying you're scheduled that evening to work. Even if you don't explicitly invite him into work then, he knows it and you can bring it up over your meal, saying how much fun it'd be to keep the fun/great convo/whatever going... And boom! Hello VIP Room.
    2) Arrange to meet him but mention that you'd normally work that evening and since you're low on funds and/or saving up for something in particular (whether you are or not), you can't give up a night of work in good conscience. If the guy is decent and/or simply has the money, he will offer to pay you, probably without you having to ask. Just hint. A lot.
    3) The last idea I have is meeting him without the possibility of making a profit... right away. Meet him for lunch, be beautiful, sweet, etc. (like I'm certain you are naturally) but try to establish what his deal is. Is he someone that you can depend on to come into the club steadily (i.e. a regular)? If so, maybe a free lunch here and there is OK... as long as he will still visit and deliver in the club!

    Hopefully I've been helpful. Not sure how your club and city work since I know there are variations across the baord but those are the approaches I would take.

    Good luck, girl!

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    No, you don't go out with him. Tell him to visit you again the next time he's in town. If your club offers meals have him buy you off the list to dine with.
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Alof of men in las Vegas are willing to pay well to have. Pretty girl accompany them to dinner or to gamble... Nothing more .if that falls in your comfort level than do so but unless you can be upfront and get him to confirm that he will be paying you... don't be surprised when you leave with a full tummy and a light pocketbook. Hinting will get you only so far.... If u expect to be compensated than you must make that clear. Otherwise your simply going on a date.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Check the local laws...
    Don't you ever sleep?
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    this.


    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    No, you don't go out with him. Tell him to visit you again the next time he's in town. If your club offers meals have him buy you off the list to dine with.

    i need for dancers to stop meeting customers outside of the club in general. they ask only because someone at some point met them outside of the club, so maybe if everyone stops meeting customers outside, they'll stop asking? [/wishful thinking]


    but i guess if you MUST go, then request a huge hourly fee.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    I would consider going, provided I drove myself there, was never alone with him or anything, he knew it was dinner and not anything sexual, and most of all, he was paying big $$$. If he wasn't paying a lot for it, I'd rather be putting in a shift at the club.


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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    You don't go out to dinner. You are not a bag of chips at a convenient store that he can just pick up for a snack on a time crunch.

    You tell them "Well I don't normally go out on last minute dinner dates. Especially with people I don't know or am not familiar with."

    Get his info and tell him to call or email you when he's back in town and YOU'LL LET HIM KNOW WHEN IF YOU ARE WORKING OR NOT.

    If he asks about dinner then just say "well we have to get to know each other first." and seriously if he has a problem with that (and he will) no loss on your part.

    Just the other night an out of towner said "Can I take you out to dinner I'm leaving tomorrow".

    I said I couldn't make it but if he gave me an email address or number I'd contact him so that I know when he was in town again. (No mention of dinner. Just when he flies in again.)

    So what does he do? Gives me his hotel name and room number. Then asks "Are you gonna call?" I just told him "I don't know."

    No dinner dates. Just because they spend a lot of money in the club does not mean they are entitled to anything more.

    That is also a perfect opportunity to get you drunk and they have the off handed chance of sleeping with you.

    Not all guys are like that but don't give people the benefit of the doubt.




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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Don't go to dinner. He wants free milk so to speak. I was intimidated to throw a price out once to a regular customer I have who wanted to meet for drinks before work. They want your company but they don't want to pay for it. So I tossed him out a price..can't remember what it was now but I basically added up what I could make in private shows for an hour and gave him that number. He negotiated down a tad. I told him ok we'll meet at a bar near where I work, you can have me for an hour, no contact at all. It feels odd at first but your time is worth money

    unless you have a genuine interest in the guy then that changes things but as you know once they can 'date' you they no longer pay to see you and you lose a regular

    I just always act like I'm really busy but I may be able to squeeze in a drink or two but it will cost him

    btw despite it feeling a bit weird he paid to meet me, it was a pleasant time and it keeps us on that custy/dancer relationship

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    this.

    i need for dancers to stop meeting customers outside of the club in general. they ask only because someone at some point met them outside of the club, so maybe if everyone stops meeting customers outside, they'll stop asking? [/wishful thinking]


    but i guess if you MUST go, then request a huge hourly fee.
    I disagree with this.

    We are supposed to be professionals in this business correct? What other business would deny you going for a business lunch/dinner with customers?!

    NONE I know of.

    I meet 2-3 regs a month for lunch/casino/golf, but I took my time, cultivated slowly, and they are a guarantee to come in to work and visit, and spend money. For me, this type of "OTC" is a good way to both get what you want. They want company, you want cash, it works. I'm in a good comfort zone since it's super public, and neither one of us has to yell to speak to each other.
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Thank you everyone for your replies You all provided me w/ great information and various ways for me to handle this.

    I know dancers from my home town that would go out w/ their regulars. No sex. Just dinner. And their custys would go to the club and still spend $$. I've always been impressed w/ a dancer's ability to do this. Some of you may think it's strange of me to be impressed but you gotta admit that dancers that can do this as a way of maintaining a customer inside and outside of the club and not have it affect their money in a negative way is quite impressive.

    The only problem for me is that I THINK these businessmen want me to go to dinner for FREE because they spent a lot of $$ on me in the club ... not ok w/ me. They always tell me, "You're so down to earth and so much fun. I would like to get to know you better and take you out to dinner but unfortunately I'm going home tomorrow. Perhaps the next time I'm in town." Sounds like a bs line to me ... but I could be wrong. My days off are precious and it's my time to recharge my batteries. But I will admit, if I would get PAID for dinner and companionship ONLY (I am NOT an extras gal), it would be easier than dealing w/ the strip club environment for the night.

    Well it's something for me to ponder how I will handle it WHEN it comes up again. It's almost like developing a different type of hustle.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    I can see where Kitana is coming from and totally agree on the business aspect. However in stripping I wouldn't do it. Especially if you're new to the business.

    Customer relations can be maintained over the phone, through text and in the club.

    There are plenty of ways to get a customer to come back without meeting him OTC.




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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Not new to stripping ... veteran stripper here ... but I am newly living in Vegas ... use to just do working vacations. It's a totally different dynamic in Vegas vs. my home town. I actually love how transient it is here. I've never liked the local custy regular thing ... I always found them TOO NEEDY ... bleck ... BUT ... I would like the out-of-town businessmen coming through Vegas to be my regulars.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    You know what? If you REALLY want to do this... call the sheriff's department and ask them about the legality around it. Do you need an escort's license to do it? If the sheriff says yes, then tell your customer he has to pay that and for what the club would charge in the champagne room per hour.

    Either way, I STRONGLY encourage you to look at what the law says... not what a bunch of strangers who don't know the laws in your area say. The strangers aren't the one's deciding if you'll get a ticket if you get caught or he's an undercover cop.
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    You know what? If you REALLY want to do this... call the sheriff's department and ask them about the legality around it. Do you need an escort's license to do it? If the sheriff says yes, then tell your customer he has to pay that and for what the club would charge in the champagne room per hour.

    Either way, I STRONGLY encourage you to look at what the law says... not what a bunch of strangers who don't know the laws in your area say. The strangers aren't the one's deciding if you'll get a ticket if you get caught or he's an undercover cop.
    Oh heck, I didn't even think about NEEDING an escort license. Thanks for mentioning that! When ever I think about escorting I think about selling sex ... BTW I have nothing against prostitution but I don't do it. I totally forgot that legal escorting is paid companionship but no sex.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Quote Originally Posted by AdventureBaby View Post
    I totally forgot that legal escorting is paid companionship but no sex.
    Exactly, and if you are caught in private and don't have an escort license you'll likely be ticketed for escorting without a license AND prostitution - even if you didn't do anything.
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Kylea gives good advice here. Don't do anything to get arrested.

    I know it pisses some girls off but I do go on "dates" with high paying customers I know. $500 minimum but I usually expect $1K++. Why? It's easier than going to work and hustling my ass off and they still come into work to see me at work anyway. I've only ever done it with 4-5 customers though, but a few are obviously a regularish thing. I almost always have brought another dancer with me or arranged for him to bring a friend so another dancer can come. But if it is someone I am comfortable with have gone alone.

    Never do it for free though. But ya where I live it is legal to sell yourself on the street so I cannot be arrested. This is against club rules where I work though, but many girls do it. It's one of those things the club doesn't want to hear about but doesn't care that you do as long as it means the customers continue to come to the club. As long as they don't see you actually exchange numbers and you do not leave with the customer (against the law) they don't seem to worry too much.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    Kylea gives good advice here. Don't do anything to get arrested.

    I know it pisses some girls off but I do go on "dates" with high paying customers I know. $500 minimum but I usually expect $1K++. Why? It's easier than going to work and hustling my ass off and they still come into work to see me at work anyway. I've only ever done it with 4-5 customers though, but a few are obviously a regularish thing. I almost always have brought another dancer with me or arranged for him to bring a friend so another dancer can come. But if it is someone I am comfortable with have gone alone.

    Never do it for free though. But ya where I live it is legal to sell yourself on the street so I cannot be arrested. This is against club rules where I work though, but many girls do it. It's one of those things the club doesn't want to hear about but doesn't care that you do as long as it means the customers continue to come to the club. As long as they don't see you actually exchange numbers and you do not leave with the customer (against the law) they don't seem to worry too much.
    I agree!

    One of my casino buddies comes into town about once a month/once every 2 months; he calls the week before to let me know what days and such, and we go meet at the casino, have dinner there, then gamble for HOURS. Then he goes to his room, and I go home. He will get a hug and a kiss on the cheek at the end of the night, and that's it and he knows it; but he pays WELL for it; last time we met to play cards, I ended up leaving with over $1,800 for the night. There would be NO WAY I could do that at work, especially for doing nothing but looking cute fully dressed and playing cards, lol.

    Be careful with the laws, have fun, and keep it a secret at work; cause you don't want other girls getting bitchy with you, it can pay off very well!
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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    Quote Originally Posted by kitana View Post
    last time we met to play cards, I ended up leaving with over $1,800 for the night. There would be NO WAY I could do that at work, especially for doing nothing but looking cute fully dressed and playing cards, lol.
    $1,800 OMG that's AWESOME! I'm all for making $$ looking cute fully dressed

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    I would do it but make sure you get paid double what you would be making in the club CR.

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    Default Re: Going out to dinner w/ an out-of-town new custy

    I -always- charge. Price is negotiable and depends on time/place. Especially if it means that I will miss work on a good night.

    If they're creepy, I bring a girl friend. She doesn't get paid. But he pays for her meal. I play her off as a real girlfriend (sometimes true!) or as a good friend that I take out with me before I know someone well enough.

    I always meet them there, rather than drive with them. Safety.

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