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Thread: a guy buys you a drink....

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    Default a guy buys you a drink....

    I danced for a few years, quit, and have recently gone back. When I danced before I was not 21 and could not drink, now I am and can. I have found a dilemma in this. I sit down with a guy, he buys me a drink, I realize I am not going to make money off of him, but now feel obligated to him since he's bought me this drink.
    So what do you do? How do you get away quickly without sounding like a greedy bitch?

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    Moderator Jessie_tinydancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    If its quiet then I'll politely finish it with him and then move on. I drink pretty fast though. If it's busy then I just stay for a few minutes (5 or less) and either excuse myself and say, "I think Im on stage soon I'm going to go check with the MC. Thanks for the drink". I always allude to the fact that I will not be coming back.

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Do not feel obligated to sit with them because they bought you a drink!!! It is a few bucks for a few minutes of your time and to see if you can close the deal.

    If some idiot gets mad at you for leaving- calmly explain that you don't make money off of men buying you drinks and that the club does not pay you. In fact since you pay the club you are LOOSING money sitting with him.

    I usually wont drink unless I am making money of of someone anyway. Unless it is a beginning of the night drink to loosen up.

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    I pretty much avoid this by telling them I don't drink. If they have the money to buy me a drink and put a few dollars on the stage then they probably have enough for a lap dance and I'd rather sell them a dance than get a drink.
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    i thank him and tell him i'll see him in a little bit, take the drink and leave. i'm not waisting my precious hustling time on a deadbeat out of a sense of duty
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Just be aware that a lot of guys girls "think" are time wasters aren't necessarily. I know 2 that go to my club regularly. They're are girls who will never have a drink with them. I do only when it's quiet and it pays off. Once I had gained one guys trust he now always gives me at least $50 for having a drink with him and the other always only tips me on stage...usually around $40. Im not saying waste ages with these guys but, multiply that extra $90 by the 3 days they come in... That's 270 a week for 30mins-hour of "drinks". I wouldn't recommend this behaviour at busy times though.

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    A drink does not entitle one to conversation. You shouldn't be rude but, if you feel it's going nowhere, thank him nicely and move on. That being said, just because they might not buy a dance doesn't mean there isn't money to be made. Some of my best regulars have never bought a dance from me. We sit and drink and talk ... and they pay me very well for my time. I know that is the exception rather than the rule, but sometimes they just want/need someone to talk to.

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    Featured Member exotica268's Avatar
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    We have to get 5 drinks, average/per shift @ my club, so I always feel like I'm getting "something" out of the whole drink-thing, even if the guy doesn't want to spend more on me. However, I still have a rule that I will sit with a guy for a max of 3 songs (unless it's dead and/or it's a very special regular who I know will compensate me) PER DRINK. I think that's more than enough, and I usually start telling them that they're ready to have fun (spend more money) on the 2nd of the 3rd song.

    SOMETIMES, however, it takes FOREVER for a waitress to come over...so I don't sit for the whole 3 songs. <--- Keep this part in mind. How long does it take you to get the drink? How long do you feel obligated to sit?

    I mean, you're right, it would look bad to get the drink, ask him to spend more money, then abruptly leave when he says no...but there are ways to eloquently excuse yourself, while thanking him for the drink and explaining that you need to try and sell some lapdances and rooms.

    I usually smile and say thanks for the drink. I tell him it's time to play. If he says no, I usually still try for a bit (how long depends on each individual). If it's really a "no," I gulp down the rest of my drink (that I'm usually drinking quickly if he doesn't seem like a spender, anyhow), and say..."well, thanks for the drink and conversation! I really appreciate being able to take a breather every now and then, but I have to sell some lapdances now. Let me know if you change your mind and want a little more physical attention (flirty/cutesy smile).

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Hmmm. I have this dilema as well. We do get something out of selling drinks at my club, so if the room is dead or slow, I will sit with customers who are buying lots of drinks. Your main objective however, is to sell dances. My main objective is to sell dances as well, because I ALWAYS make more money from dances than from drinks. If there are other prospective customers, then you will want to move on to sell dances. Don't order something big. Ask for drinks in small glasses or shots if possible. If you don't want to drink liqour, set up a code word for fake shots. At most clubs you are not suppossed to turn down drinks, so if a waitress asks the guy to get me a drink and he says yes, then I am obliged to get something. If he asks to buy you a drink when not in front of the waitress, then ask if he would like to tip you instead because you don't drink or whatever. I think its always polite to try and finish the drink before excusing yourself, but that is not always possible. Just excuse yourself if they don't want a dance, thank them for the drink again and leave. Always take the drink with you, and either take it to the bar or dressing room and dump it. Be sure he doesn't see you dump it. Make it appear that you are going to still drink it when you leave. Never leave it or carry a drink to another table of customers. It always annoys me when girls order VERY expensive cans of redbull or martinis and leave them sitting with the customer.
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    I always ended up selling more commissioned drinks than dances because customers enjoyed my company and conversation and felt like they were getting more out of buying me a drink than a dance. $30 drink would get them easily 15-20 minutes of conversation versus a $30 lapdance which only lasted 3 minutes.

    And I never gulped down my commissioned drinks. Custies notice that and quickly realize you're doing it to get more money out of them from another drink. If I was super thirsty, I'd ask for a regular glass of ice water along with a cocktail they'd buy.

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    Senior Member inThePine's Avatar
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Right, if they have enough for an overpriced cocktail then they have enough for a dance or two from you. This might not work if the customer is already set on not getting a dance, but you could always say something along the lines of "I think a dance with me would be a better value than buying me a drink," or "save your money for a dance with me," etc. I don't know, I'm new to the dancer world, what do you guys think?

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    Veteran Member Autumn Lily's Avatar
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    I prefer the conversation, too. A few of my customers just straight up told me "I do drinks, I don't do dances" and one customer would always, without fail, buy me an expensive cocktail the moment I sat down with him and we'd just chat.

    I'm weird in my tactic, I know, but I prefer selling drinks to dances. I'm still getting paid for my time and I prefer talking and laughing over a beer or cocktail to fighting grabby hands off of me for three minutes.

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Quote Originally Posted by Autumn Lily View Post
    I prefer the conversation, too. A few of my customers just straight up told me "I do drinks, I don't do dances" and one customer would always, without fail, buy me an expensive cocktail the moment I sat down with him and we'd just chat.

    I'm weird in my tactic, I know, but I prefer selling drinks to dances. I'm still getting paid for my time and I prefer talking and laughing over a beer or cocktail to fighting grabby hands off of me for three minutes.
    I do totally get this, but don't forget to think of it this way as well:

    One dance at $30=3 minutes= $10 a minute
    One drink with conversation at $30=way more minutes=way less per minute

    I love making money off conversation, too, but unless you know that you are going to get a decent tip as well as compensation for the drink, focusing mainly on dances will always be more lucrative for you.

    I wish we got some sort of compensation for drinks, customers at my club offer them to me like no one's business. I get fake ones quite often so I'd be the most sober, well hydrated "alcoholic" in the joint.

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    Veteran Member Autumn Lily's Avatar
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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    Actually I don't even keep that whole $30. $10 goes to the club. For "Security" even though bouncers don't show up at the club until 7. It's bullshit. Never understood why they take cuts from private dances.

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    Default Re: a guy buys you a drink....

    when a giy buys me a drink I do not feel like I owe him and I get the watress to water it down do not like getting drunk at work and the ba owners get pissed if I turn it down,she rings in a coke and we split the difference.cheats a little but every one is happy in the end
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