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Thread: how bizarre

  1. #1
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Duh how bizarre

    Um alrighty then.... somebody left used syringes and condoms on my garden gnome and defecated in my tomato plants....gotta love humanity
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
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    Featured Member OJenni!'s Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    human shit?

    eww



  3. #3
    Veteran Member person's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Could have been the gnome
    Once again, the conservative, sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor
    - Dr John Zoidberg

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    God/dess Trem's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    The only possible answer is that your gnome is a filthy crack whore.

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    Senior Member inThePine's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    ^Lmao

    That's quite a combination. Maybe the syringes were used to administer medicine to the gnome? Has he been feeling ill lately? And your tomato plants are fully fertilized now!
    But yes I do love humanity so dearly, thanks to gems like these.

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    God/dess hockeybobby's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Sex with a garden gnome, drugs, and a good shit. Someone's version of:


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    Default Re: how bizarre

    ^maybe it was me. and i don't remember...i mean i do have that tattooed on me.
    Quote Originally Posted by sxcbbw View Post
    If some baristas started giving blowjobs along with their lattes, those not willing to do that would have a hard time getting custom. Same. Deal.

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    God/dess hockeybobby's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    ^^^That's what I was thinking. The poop was a dead giveaway!

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    Default Re: how bizarre

    oh how you crack me up hb
    Quote Originally Posted by sxcbbw View Post
    If some baristas started giving blowjobs along with their lattes, those not willing to do that would have a hard time getting custom. Same. Deal.

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    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    hate to put an end to everyone's fun, but it was a local transient. I called my apt manager (because of the syringes) and he called the cops. Turns out the apple doesn't fall far from the tree cause our ecologically minded friend who so generously furnished me with fertilizer was passed out by the dumpster in the alley. Also, I had been ill and this was the 1st time I had left the house in 4 days. Nice pristine sight to be greeted with.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    yikes, your location sounds pretty fucking accurate.
    Quote Originally Posted by sxcbbw View Post
    If some baristas started giving blowjobs along with their lattes, those not willing to do that would have a hard time getting custom. Same. Deal.

  12. #12
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    What's scary is this isn't my 1st encounter with 2ndhhand fecal matter. I started up a thread about it some weeks ago. And it was at the club!
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: how bizarre

    I know you said it's not funny but this thread actually made me laugh on a bad day. Thx!

  14. #14
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Quote Originally Posted by lilmisssunshine View Post
    I know you said it's not funny but this thread actually made me laugh on a bad day. Thx!
    Oh no I'm totally laughing my ass off. Laughter is the best medicine. I just feel bad for the guy they collared. I think he got charged with a few misdemeanors and 1 felony. My only concern was with used syringes and any children that could have accidentally picked them up. On a serious note...could er..human fecal matter destroy my tomato plants? its not comprised of the same organic matter as cow manure....
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Senior Member PeachyQueen's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    What's scary is this isn't my 1st encounter with 2ndhhand fecal matter. I started up a thread about it some weeks ago. And it was at the club!
    Dude. I gotta find that thread. Lol

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    Featured Member lemiwinks31's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Oh no I'm totally laughing my ass off. Laughter is the best medicine. I just feel bad for the guy they collared. I think he got charged with a few misdemeanors and 1 felony. My only concern was with used syringes and any children that could have accidentally picked them up. On a serious note...could er..human fecal matter destroy my tomato plants? its not comprised of the same organic matter as cow manure....

    the tomato plants will probably be OK....its kind of concentrated, but it will break down(compost) slowly. Just throw a little dirt over it so you dont have to look at it or smell it.


    and it should add a nice little kick to the flavor of the tomatos

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    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default Re: how bizarre

    Quote Originally Posted by PeachyQueen View Post
    Dude. I gotta find that thread. Lol
    Found it just revived it for ya
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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