Backstory first: My parents have been divorced since I was a little kid. My brother and I used to go back and forth evenly between mum's and dad's until I was 13 and decided to move out of my father's house. He was emotionally abusive towards me, and is the same towards every other woman in his life (his mom, his stepmom, my mom, me) except his sister. His abuse is frustrating in its own right because I never had any bruises to show, and when my friends have met him, he acts super cool and friendly. I guess that's beside the point. I have body image problems because of him (he offered to buy me lipo for my 14th birthday when I looked like a twig) and trust issues (typical abuser cycle of destruction, followed by apology, etc.). Also, I love my stepmom (they got married when I was 7) and she and my dad have since had another son, Jordan whom I barely know, but email with and love a lot. He is now 8. (side story my step mom is finally leaving my dad at the end of the summer... he is just that screwed up).
Current issue: My aunt (my dad's sister) is getting married on Sunday. My girlfriend (whom my dad, stepmom, and littlest brother Jordan have never met) and I were invited. My girlfriend is very close to me and to my grandparents. They love her, and know her well as we see them on lots of holidays and we've been together for over 2 years. Anyway, the wedding is Sunday and my GF and I are flying from FL to VA to go. I wanted to be there to support my aunt and grandparents, as I love them very much. But, it will be my first time being in the same room as my dad for about three years. I am very excited to see my little brother, but not so excited to see my dad. I am DEFINITELY going to be civil and calm, as this wedding is NOT my place to air my personal issues with my father. I totally realize that. And I think I can do it. But for most of my life my father has been able to make me cry in 0.5 seconds. I will never, ever let this wedding turn into anything other than a celebration for my aunt, but I am nervous to be in the same position I once was with my dad. Unfortunately, I have a soft spot for him since 1) he is my dad and 2) he always acts nice at first (that's how he sucks you in). Though after 22 years I should realize that there is no new leaf he is turning over.
So... has anyone been through this before? Was it awkward? I am not going to run around the ballroom to avoid him the whole night. I plan to act like a civil adult and look him in the eye and speak with him when it comes up. I am just nervous...



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