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Thread: HELP!!!!!!!!!

  1. #1
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    Default HELP!!!!!!!!!

    Okay....so, we're talking about the guy with dick issues (yes I'm still with him) again. Here lately he's been inviting me to go to dinner or to hang with he and his daughter. *Enter record scratching noise*. We've only been seeing eachother for about 3 months. I feel like we're still getting to know eachother. He invited me (via txt) to go to dinner with he and his daughter tonight. She's 5 yrs old. I feel like she isn't ready for the exposure to daddy's 'friend/gf'. I don't even know what he was going to introduce me as. Last thing I need is for her to run home to mom and tell her that daddy has a new 'friend/gf'. Anyway, I ended up calling him and told him that I do want to meet her, but I'm not ready for that yet, that it's to soon. I dated a guy years ago and there was a neighbor kid that came over and hung with us all the time and he got attached. When we broke up it tore everyone up. I don't want to go through that again. I didn't realize how selfish both of us had been in that relationship, even though it was a neighbor kid. I learned alot from that experience. I know current guy and I need to get together and decide on when, what and how we're going to do this. He even wanted me to meet his sister who is coming in next week, but luckily for me I'll be out of town for an assignment. I can deal with meeting siblings and whatnot (provided they're adults) but kids....kids are drawn to me and that's all in good I just don't want for his daughter to get hurt if things don't work out between he and I. She's already shown behavioral issues since her family has split up. I'm just trying to make room for error. And make sure there is a solid foundation before we move on into deeper territory. So am I wrong for not being ready? Am I being paranoid? Better yet....when is the right time to meet a significant other's child/children? HELP!!!!!!!!

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    God/dess Kisca's Avatar
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    Default Re: HELP!!!!!!!!!

    No No ... It was only 3 months.. 3 months is nothing, and you said it yourself you're both still getting to know each other. I think it is wrong to meet the child as a "girlfriend" and knowing the feeling she might be attached or wondering things after. You could ask him to have a few friends over, mixed ratio of females and males and introduce yourself as a friend if he insisted, this way you two can spend time and the child has many adults to get attention from and to talk to, she will get comfy to you in a friend level and not a family attachment, this is a easier and safer way to play it and slowly build the relationship, and when you think things will get serious with two of you, you can let the child know you two are dating. Also do tell him, how you feel, and to let him think of his daughter feelings before inviting you to dinner as a girlfriend.

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: HELP!!!!!!!!!

    I never been in your situation, and it sounds very difficult to handle!

    I think you should just follow your heart. If you really do not feel ready, then so be it. You shouldnt let anyone force you to do what you dont feel ready to do yet.

    Dont doubt your feelings. You just dont feel comfortable with it yet - so tell him. If he can respect that, then you can respect him. If he makes you feel stupid about not wanting to hang out with his daughter - then, that is his fault for making you feel stupid about your feelings.

    It does not feel good to be with someone who makes u feel stupid about how u feel.
    [True Passion Demands Respect]
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