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Thread: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Firewall View Post
    I fancy a few of my regulars who are genuinely respectful and kind without propositioning me, but not in the sense of me wanting to go out with them ... if anything if just makes me really appreciate them given the circumstances and types of guys I usually encounter at work. It makes the nice ones stand out.
    But dancers need to be careful with this, and not start to feel like anybody is doing them a favor just by not acting like a dirtbag around them. It's not healthy for the dancer or the customer if the dancer treats the customer like some big hero just for having basic human decency.

    Many, maybe most, of the customers in a strip club at any given time are there because they are too obnoxious for any woman to want them. The non-obnoxious customers just stand out by comparison.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    ^She means the SCs sort out the really okay men from the bad. All men have to behave a certain way outside SCs but inside them they feel they can get away with more. Even most decent guys would feel more entitled to proposition strippers in SCs than girls IRL, since the girls behave and dress in an overtly sexy and erotic manner (unlike most girls IRL) and it is a fun and less inhibited environment (as in any other entertainment venue). They just don't realize all the reasons strippers refuse dates or propositions from customers.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    ^ I don't agree. Asking a dancer to date you in any sense is generally about as logical as going to McDonalds and shouting over the counter "Hey! I bet you'd love to cook me a hamburger for FREE tomorrow night!".

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    I have made the mistake of dating someone who was a customer....never never never again!

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    ^ It's true you're much more likely to meet a nice guy in, say, a laudrymat than a strip club. But it could be that Mr. Right has his own washing machine, and you'd be out of luck. Maybe this isn't true for everybody, but my philosophy is that the foundation of an LTR is friendship. Look for male friends, then turn one into a boyfiend if/when the chemistry is right. The first few months can just be getting together in public places where you each drive yourself. A worthwhile guy (SC customer or not) will understand this and be down with it.

    Unfortunately in a relationship, it's hard to avoid power struggles. For the typical dancer, the dancer-custy relationhip is a somewhat servile one. That seems to make it hard for dancers to date custies, since they often have to do a lot of fighting just to get any where near a 50-50 balance of power.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Most of my girlfriends & past wife were entertainers...I have always been attracted to them because that's the only woman that could keep up sexually...single now & i have one on my mind that I want to visit.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    ^ Unfortunately in a relationship, it's hard to avoid power struggles
    I would go so far as to say that most relationships that last are power struggles that got resolved.

    As for dating a stripper, I'm probably too old now for anything but a sugar-daddy scenario. But if a real relationship ever developed, I think it would be easy for her to achieve a 60/40 balance just by being nice to me.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    ^ I don't agree. Asking a dancer to date you in any sense is generally about as logical as going to McDonalds and shouting over the counter "Hey! I bet you'd love to cook me a hamburger for FREE tomorrow night!".
    A date is not the same as a lapdance, and is possibly of more benefit to the stripper than the money he would pay her for a lapdance. For the average customer, yes a stripper will think that the LD money outweighs the chance of a date turning out well for her. Many strippers at this site have said they dated customers and a few of them said this resulted in successful LTRs. So it is not totally illogical to ask strippers out.
    Last edited by Hopper; 09-19-2010 at 04:25 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    Unfortunately in a relationship, it's hard to avoid power struggles. For the typical dancer, the dancer-custy relationhip is a somewhat servile one. That seems to make it hard for dancers to date custies, since they often have to do a lot of fighting just to get any where near a 50-50 balance of power.
    If the customer dates a stripper, he will probably not remain a customer. If he does, there is not likely to be a power struggle between them in the SC, because he gets more than just a LD from her free of charge outside the club and also because the power relationship in the club does not leave the club and extend to their sexual relationship.

    I don't view a business transaction as necessarily being a power struggle. In a SC, the customer pays and the stripper lapdances - it's a simple exchange. Each of them is exploiting the other.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hopper View Post
    ^It's great to know that my best chance of dating a stripper I really like is to buy lots of LDs from her. In other words, do what I want to do.
    see, even then, i don't like to date guys who buy 47392898543 dances from me. I like for a guy to tip me well onstage, and then pay me to hang out with him. i don't mind if he wants a few dances, but 7594803890342 dances, to me, makes him a guy i don't really want to date. a guy who pays me for my time shows me that he really wants to get to know me.
    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    Sucking dick should pay really, really, really, really well. If you are not living well and you suck dick for a living, you're doing it wrong.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by jamedodger View Post
    Just to let you know that i am a male, i'm not trying to deceive anyone, i'm not that sort of person. i genuinely made a mistake when i signed up and i cant seem to change my ribbon now, any ideas? Well i suppose it's one way to become a female! lol

    ps - I could'nt find any posts like this, thats why i asked.
    Moderators cannot fix a gender mistake. Please PM pryce...he is the site owner or stripperweb who is the Super Moderator and ask that the mistake be corrected. We don't require pictures here and depend upon our members to be honest in terms of posting access to threads. It really is a big deal.

    Thanks,
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    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Surprise View Post
    see, even then, i don't like to date guys who buy 47392898543 dances from me. I like for a guy to tip me well onstage, and then pay me to hang out with him. i don't mind if he wants a few dances, but 7594803890342 dances, to me, makes him a guy i don't really want to date. a guy who pays me for my time shows me that he really wants to get to know me.
    I think Hopper (and other guys) are under the impression that if they spend so much money it automatically means the dancer will date them. While I wouldn't likely date a customer who spent nothing, I can't guarantee I'd date a guy who spent a lot of money either. I've had regulars who spent a lot of money, asked me out but I still didn't date. It's a tricky situation because while one dancer might truly like the guy, the other might have a strict no dating customers. My case is a strange situation. He wasn't my richest customer nor my hottest one.

    What's funny though is that I love a former customer, I had a strict no dating policy when I work non dancing jobs. In the clubs I dated a DJ (bad idea), bouncer (broke up as friends) and currently want a former customer. I wonder why this is?

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hopper View Post
    A date is not the same as a lapdance, and is possibly of more benefit to the stripper than the money he would pay her for a lapdance. For the average customer, yes a stripper will think that the LD money outweighs the chance of a date turning out well for her. Many strippers at this site have said they dated customers and a few of them said this resulted in successful LTRs. So it is not totally illogical to ask strippers out.
    Agreed, that's why I said "generally". If a guy likes women who like to play hard to get, yea, I guess he just has to repatedly ask out every woman he's attracted to. That's the problem with that whole game, it results in a lot of annoyance to women, and also I think is responsible for a lot of the hostility some guys build up towards women. I am only interested in women who will drop hints they are interested. But most dancers flirt with custies as a part of the sales pitch, so you can't go by that with them. But since dancers get use to the role-reversal, I think they don't find it so hard to ask guys out. A few have asked me out, although I think that's often just a con or a practical joke.

    The dancers I know have told me that, when a custy asks them out, they think "Doh! now when I turn him down I'm going to loose a regular, crap!". So it may be polite, if you're going to ask, to start out with "this won't affect me buying dances from you but....".

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Hopper View Post
    I don't view a business transaction as necessarily being a power struggle. In a SC, the customer pays and the stripper lapdances - it's a simple exchange. Each of them is exploiting the other.
    Dancers typically act like they think the custy wants them to act (within limits), which is normally not entirely who they really are. So when a guy asks them out, he's not going get exactly that woman on the date that he asked out in the club. She may get lucky, the guy may be smart enough to filter out the sucking up, and see only her true nature. But there's a good chance she'll have to deal with a melt-down when the guy finds out she doesn't suck up for free. A lot of dancers have similar problems with non-custy dates, they break the news they dance, and the guy immediately starts expecting them to be suck-ups.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    I think Hopper (and other guys) are under the impression that if they spend so much money it automatically means the dancer will date them. While I wouldn't likely date a customer who spent nothing, I can't guarantee I'd date a guy who spent a lot of money either. I've had regulars who spent a lot of money, asked me out but I still didn't date. It's a tricky situation because while one dancer might truly like the guy, the other might have a strict no dating customers. My case is a strange situation. He wasn't my richest customer nor my hottest one.

    What's funny though is that I love a former customer, I had a strict no dating policy when I work non dancing jobs. In the clubs I dated a DJ (bad idea), bouncer (broke up as friends) and currently want a former customer. I wonder why this is?
    I would never want to date anyone who would date me based on how much money I spent on them. I mean, I'm not going to be a cheap shit, because that's not who I am. But I'm not interested in the kind of affection that can be bought. Fine for a sugar baby, but not for a real LTR.

    A lot of dancers seem to think I should buy dances based on how good a wife they'd be. But of course, it's mostly about appearance and what types of contact the dancer is comfortable with.

    Hope you find somebody to be good to who's good to you.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    I would never want to date anyone who would date me based on how much money I spent on them. I mean, I'm not going to be a cheap shit, because that's not who I am. But I'm not interested in the kind of affection that can be bought. Fine for a sugar baby, but not for a real LTR.

    A lot of dancers seem to think I should buy dances based on how good a wife they'd be. But of course, it's mostly about appearance and what types of contact the dancer is comfortable with.

    Hope you find somebody to be good to who's good to you.
    That's the way it should be. The guy I want to be with was never a big spender but wasn't cheap either. I guess the best way to put it is that if it's there, it's there. However, many guys think the more they spend the more likely they are to get the dancer.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    I have no issues dating customers of OTHER dancers....but one of mine. No way! To many issues and too much potential for drama.
    "I hear you calling and it's needles and pins. I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name...You're poision. but I don't wanna break these chains.... I wanna love you but I'd better not touch."

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    He wasnt really a customer, I met him the first day and was attached. We had many interests/hobbies in common. He told me he had a new recent gf while I was giving him a LD. He came in a month later.. and we talked he got a few LDs and kissed me - we exchanged numbers. Met up at a bar after and we made out. He was a nice guy, paid for my drinks, food etc (which I expected lol) ...

    After that, he told me he has a 2 year girlfriend - that he wants to marry her etc. I didnt get mad, I just got out of a 2 y/r relationship and it helped relief the pain/hurt/stress. But I did talk to him, not to do these things if he loves her and wants to marry her. He said "What she does not know doesnt not hurt her" We discussed that, and I told him to be honest and not to fool around if he is serious. He was ok as fooling around but not sex - I discussed w/ him to think about it clearly before getting engaged.. Kissing is still cheating!

    A week later.... He got engaged. We spoke only one time after that, just how are things w/ no intention of meeting. I would be fine being friends w/ him since he is a fun guy, he is nice, and watched out for me if I got home carefully and such etc. But even if he was single I would not continue it further .. a person like that will still do that to their partner w/o thinking whats going to happen when she finds out.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kisca View Post
    He wasnt really a customer, I met him the first day and was attached. We had many interests/hobbies in common. He told me he had a new recent gf while I was giving him a LD. He came in a month later.. and we talked he got a few LDs and kissed me - we exchanged numbers. Met up at a bar after and we made out. He was a nice guy, paid for my drinks, food etc (which I expected lol) ...

    After that, he told me he has a 2 year girlfriend - that he wants to marry her etc. I didnt get mad, I just got out of a 2 y/r relationship and it helped relief the pain/hurt/stress. But I did talk to him, not to do these things if he loves her and wants to marry her. He said "What she does not know doesnt not hurt her" We discussed that, and I told him to be honest and not to fool around if he is serious. He was ok as fooling around but not sex - I discussed w/ him to think about it clearly before getting engaged.. Kissing is still cheating!

    A week later.... He got engaged. We spoke only one time after that, just how are things w/ no intention of meeting. I would be fine being friends w/ him since he is a fun guy, he is nice, and watched out for me if I got home carefully and such etc. But even if he was single I would not continue it further .. a person like that will still do that to their partner w/o thinking whats going to happen when she finds out.
    I have zero interest in if my partner has sex with another person or not (providing they are safe during everything.) I'd still be PISSED if I was this dudes gf. Yes, kissing and taking out another woman is cheating if your primary partner doesn't know and approve of it. What she doesn't know won't hurt her??? Jeezus!! He doesn't respect women (or at least her) AT ALL!!! Total scumbag.

    I agree with you btw, if he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
    "I hear you calling and it's needles and pins. I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name...You're poision. but I don't wanna break these chains.... I wanna love you but I'd better not touch."

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    I have to agree as well. He doesn't sound like a nice guy. Nice guy wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend, especially since she didn't know.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    He was a bit messed up in his life... I think he was dealing w/ a few problem with his past for his actions.. Being him in a relationship yes he is dirt.. but as a friend, he was a good person, he could joke, get into deep conversations, anything really.. This is why I liked him. But after I found out he decided to do that, and say that about his girlfriend, I confronted him about his thoughts. I told him it was wrong.. I hope he did change or at least told his gf. Both of them are still young so I dont see them going anywhere. When he spoke w/ me about marriage, he HAD to get married or else it was nothing.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Surprise View Post
    see, even then, i don't like to date guys who buy 47392898543 dances from me. I like for a guy to tip me well onstage, and then pay me to hang out with him. i don't mind if he wants a few dances, but 7594803890342 dances, to me, makes him a guy i don't really want to date. a guy who pays me for my time shows me that he really wants to get to know me.
    I wasn't saying multiple LDs would guarantee me a date, just that it would be the best chance, whereas previously I would have expected it to make me look desperate or inferior and turn the stripper off of dating me. I understood Kellydancer to be talking about a guy she actually liked - it wasn't just the fact that he bought loads of LDs from her. I'm not going to use buying LDs as a strategy for picking up strippers. That's the dumbest thing I could do, because strippers use that to get more LDs.
    Last edited by Hopper; 09-20-2010 at 06:13 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    I think Hopper (and other guys) are under the impression that if they spend so much money it automatically means the dancer will date them.
    No, I said that previously I thought the opposite of that. I understood that you were talking about a guy you actually liked and that you didn't like him just because he spent a lot on you, but because the number of LDs he bought from you allowed you to get to know him over a period of time and find out that you are suited to one another.

    All I meant by that comment was that getting as many LDs as I like will not turn a stripper off of dating me. I did not mean that I would get multiple LDs with her as a way to get a date with her. I get LDs because I like LDs, and only as many as I really want. (So far the maximum has been three.) I don't get LDs to try to get dates. That is asking for trouble, because strippers know guys do that and they use it to get more LDs. I can get dates the normal way, far more cheaply, without the games and with girls just as nice. If I want to date a stripper, all I have to do is ask.

    While I wouldn't likely date a customer who spent nothing, I can't guarantee I'd date a guy who spent a lot of money either. I've had regulars who spent a lot of money, asked me out but I still didn't date. It's a tricky situation because while one dancer might truly like the guy, the other might have a strict no dating customers. My case is a strange situation. He wasn't my richest customer nor my hottest one.

    What's funny though is that I love a former customer, I had a strict no dating policy when I work non dancing jobs. In the clubs I dated a DJ (bad idea), bouncer (broke up as friends) and currently want a former customer. I wonder why this is?
    Last edited by Hopper; 09-20-2010 at 06:15 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    Agreed, that's why I said "generally".
    Right. Sorry. But I wasn't sure what you were disagreeing with me about.

    If a guy likes women who like to play hard to get, yea, I guess he just has to repatedly ask out every woman he's attracted to. That's the problem with that whole game, it results in a lot of annoyance to women, and also I think is responsible for a lot of the hostility some guys build up towards women. I am only interested in women who will drop hints they are interested. But most dancers flirt with custies as a part of the sales pitch, so you can't go by that with them. But since dancers get use to the role-reversal, I think they don't find it so hard to ask guys out. A few have asked me out, although I think that's often just a con or a practical joke.
    I guess how much you are prepared to annoy a girl who doesn't like you depends on how much you like her. People can change their minds, so a little annoying is probably justified. Generally though a guy should only pursue women who hint they are interested. The only way to tell with a stripper, who is probably playing a whole different game, is to ask for her number and then phone her up - before spending more than you really wish to.

    The dancers I know have told me that, when a custy asks them out, they think "Doh! now when I turn him down I'm going to loose a regular, crap!". So it may be polite, if you're going to ask, to start out with "this won't affect me buying dances from you but....".
    Good idea. But I have never been a regular. After a few LDs with any one stripper I've pretty much done all I am can do with her in the SC. With most strippers I've bought LDs from one LD was enough. Only a few of them were nice enough that I wanted repeats from them. So I'd probably be telling the truth if I said dating would not change the number of LDs I get.
    Last edited by Hopper; 09-20-2010 at 06:17 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert.

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    Default Re: Do any strippers ever fancy any of their customers?

    I always found it a lot easier to establish RL non-compensatory relationships with dancers to whom I was never (or barely) a customer. To the best of my recollection, just one or two girls I was ever a regular customer to were willing to interact outside the club before dances were essentially eliminated from our interactions, in other words until I stopped acting like a customer or as Hopper called it, the "mutual exploitation" ended.
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

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