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Thread: I keep drawing a blank.....

  1. #1
    Featured Member CherryBomb954's Avatar
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    Default I keep drawing a blank.....

    So, I've been having this problem at work ALOT lately.

    When approaching customers, I completely draw a blank. Like my mind just goes numb, I start fumbling for words.....and end up saying something completely riduculous. Big d'oh (slaps forehead) moment for me! Then I of course end up not making the sale....and am walking away like this: As a result, I get nervous and either run to the DR or outside and end up wasting ALOT of time. I get so embarassed. I also get "the fear" and am hesistant to approach another customer cause I don't want it to be a repeat of the last. Often times I will see a customer that I had a d'oh moment with later on looking at me and talking with their friends, and I am imagining them telling everyone what a weirdo I am.

    I am not sure if this is because I stopped drinking at work, cause before when I was buzzed I would walk up to customers, and shit would just roll off my tounge like nothing.....half the time I don't even know where it would come from but it would be like I was on some sort of super-hustle autopilot.

    I have been doing well in spite of the fact I am only a few weeks in to dancing sober, and the club gets packed out on some nights and I get asked for dances all night....which is easy. It's the nights where I have to ask people, like the slower nights, that I am slipping. Not only am I missing out on more money but nights like this are really a pain in the ass and it discourages me sometimes. The conversation part of everything is THE hardest to deal with sober. The dancing part does not bother me at all.

    Ugh, HOW can I fix this????

  2. #2
    Featured Member exotica268's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    If you say something ridiculous, play it off and pretend like it's no big deal. A smile and a light-hearted attitude can get you far.

    Congrats on not drinking at work! I don't have anything against those who do, but I highly applaud those who make an effort to stop.

    People are most likely not talking about how weird you are unless you REALLY pissed them off or made some quirky offer. They are there to have fun, and you are not the center of the universe. I'm not trying to be rude when saying that...it's just something that really helped me when I thought people were talking about me and giving me strange looks...basically when I was being paranoid. Any you know, maybe some of them were, but who cares? Focus your energy on something else.

    It's so much easier to talk to customers when you're buzzed (if you're used to doing it this way). Have you ever considered that you were saying ridiculous things then, but just didn't care bc you were buzzed? Maybe those things just seem ridiculous now (even though they really aren't) bc you can think more about them?

    Have you tried searching HH for some scripts? These can help get you into customer convo mode, even though they don't have to be set in stone.

    I'm not naturally an outgoing person (when it comes down to it), so sometimes I have 1 "test customer" when I start work. I go up to someone, not intending to really sell, but to just get myself warmed up. If I sell...great! But if I don't, at least I got more into convo mode.

    Maybe practice scripts on the way to work while in the car. I talk to myself sometimes, and I also smile to myself lol.

    What are you saying that you think is so silly?

    Things should get easier as time goes on, though I'm sure you know this.

    If you worry about saying something silly, then just keep him talking by asking questions. Don't reveal too much about yourself. Everyone likes talking about themselves, and this way you'll get to know the customer better and how to cater to his needs.

    Some people might disagree w this and say that it's a waste of time, but if you financially can handle it, devote a night of your work to just practicing talking to people. Go in there not expecting to make much and practice practice practice. Force yourself to go up to people. Push yourself as much as possible. Tell yourself before the start of the shift that you will NOT spend more than x amt of minutes outside or x amt of minutes in dressing room. Write this down if you have to. Also consider writing out a basic, raw script.

    This also sounds odd, but have you considered pretending that you're drinking? I seriously loosen up even if I'm not drinking alc when I take fake shots and drink fake drinks. This way, too, if you really say something silly, the customer might just blame it on the alcohol, and you KNOWING that the customer might blame it on the alc might alleviate your stress about the situation, allowing you to do better.

    Good luck, girl.

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  4. #3
    Senior Member alvida's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    I used to get really nervous working but now whenever I feel the anxiety creeping I repeat a mantra of "I am the hottest girl this man has EVER seen, I am the hottest girl this man will EVER see"...regardless of whether it is true or not, it gets me into a confident mode and helps me smile big and flirt!

    "fake it til you make it" theory i guess!

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    Unless the guy fits into one of my pre-planned opening sentences for some reason I usually say "Hi, I'm Kylea. What is your name?".
    Don't you ever sleep?
    Not at night...that's when the stars have rather better things to do. They're coming out, shining, that sort of thing.
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    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    Just go up to the friendliest looking guy and smile and say, "Hey, how's it going?" . Sometimes the lack of a script is refreshing and the guy will feel the urge to ask you more questions to try to figure out why you're so mysterious when all the other girls are in robo-stripper mode. I do it all the time! Usually the guys end up asking me for a dance if I sort of hold back on a full-on..."so, where ya from? How often do you come in?" etc...

    Think of beauty counters or boutiques where you walk in and the salesperson says hello and is friendly but kinda lets you do your thing. They know you're there to buy and you know they're selling..and as long as they seem approachable, you start asking them about this item or that and you walk out with a full bag of stuff you never planned on getting, but the salesperson was just genuinely cool and kick back. That's what I visualize anyways, when I'm fresh outta 'conversation'.
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    Senior Member Luna Louise's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    Sounds like you need some confidence and a sales script.

    1. Do something to boost your confidence before you go to work. (tan, work out, new outfit, pretty makeup etc)

    2. I recommend reading How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes. It has short, to the point conversation tricks to make ppl like you and to quickly build rapport.

    Also, google the topic and find stuff that you like. Write some sales scripts down in your style, your language. You'll be surprised how much comes back to you when you actually interact with ppl since you practiced

    3. Superflirt by Tracy Cox will help you use body language to your advantage. Your body language speaks louder than words. This will give you confidence and portray confidence to the customers. Tits out, back straight, open body language, big smile.

    Good Luck!

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    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: I keep drawing a blank.....

    http://changingminds.org is extremely helpful, in my opinion.
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