This is kinda long, but I need to get this off my chest.
I have close to zero respect for my boyfriend's family. His parents are biologically his grandparents; they adopted him when he was a baby. His biological mother is their child, so legally she's his sister, and she's had five kids from three (possibly four) different dads, and didn't bother raising any of them. Legally, apparently, she has full custody of her three daughter, who are aged 13, 16, and 19. But they've never lived with her, only with the grandparents.
And speaking of the grandparents, they've been married since the grandfather knocked the grandmother up when she was 14. Neither have any education to speak of. She's the worst fucking packrat I've ever seen. The house is two stories with a basement (my bf's bedroom is in the basement). But I didn't know it was two stories cause I'd never been upstairs. The other day I found out why: the stairs up are used as a storage space. Getting upstairs was like rockclimbing...the stuff covered the stairs by several feet. Upstairs there are three bedrooms, but you can't even get into them. They're filled floor to ceiling with just...crap. Who knows. Junk. Old clothes, toys, decorations, papers, whatever. The three girls sleep on the floor in the mother's room. The dad sleeps in a chair in the living room. They haven't shared a bedroom in decades. The kitchen was fucking DISGUSTING. Just crap. No counter space. The refrigerator had to be taped shut because it was so full. There was a waist-high pile of food in the corner on the floor.
Well, they're all out of town for a month and a half, so my bf and I are staying at the house to take care of his mom's four holy terror little dogs that we both despise. And the bf decided he would do something nice by cleaning up the kitchen. Threw out like 10 garbage bags of rotten food, broken plates, and various stupid crap that was shoved in some corner and covered with dust. Well, he sent a pic of how clean the kitchen is to his mom, and she calls him, SCREAMING at him, saying she's going to kick him out if everything isn't exactly as she left it by the time she gets home. She called him a fucking selfish bastard. I was like !!!!!! DUDE. I mean, there were ants crawling around everywhere in the kitchen because it was so dirty. I don't think the counter had been wiped down in a decade. If CPS ever came to check the house, it would fail. It was that disgusting. I mean, we're not talking just messy--messy is annoying, but I can handle it. We're talking dirty. Unsanitary.
We were at a father's day bbq at his house, and when he and his dad walked off to some other part of the backyard, his mom started talking about how she can't stand him (her HUSBAND) because he spends so much time up at his hunting camp--but, on second thought, she'd have no problem never seeing him, as long as he gives her his paycheck first. I was like, "um...." I was always taught to never air your dirty laundry in public. I just have no idea why she would ever THINK it's okay to insult him behind his back to people she barely even knows.
And the dad is extremely weird. He only has like half his teeth so it's really difficult to understand him when he talks. He never has anything encouraging to say. Whenever Joe accomplishes anything, his dad just brings him down, says he shouldn't have done that, it's a dead end, will never lead anywhere, etc.
I love Joe. We're going to get engaged pretty soon...we already went and got me sized for a ring. But he is big on family, and I just can't deal with them. They have like zero social skills. Honestly, they seem really, really trashy. Joe isn't like that at all. I just don't really know how to act around these people. Whenever I'm around them, they do not leave the best impression. They seem like negative, trashy people. And whatever Joe has told me about them hasn't been very nice, either. But then he's all surprised when I admitted to him that I'm not very fond of them. I mean, prove me wrong, you know? But I haven't really seen or heard any good in the situation. And what's more, his mom is MEAN. Vindictive. And it really pisses me off to see ANYONE treat him the way they do, because he's absolutely amazing. Seriously, like the most perfect guy I've ever met in my life. And he's a great son to them. They should thank their lucky stars they have someone like him. Instead, they just insult him and bring them down.
I just don't know how to deal with this. Maybe I'm just being uppity or super judgmental. I don't know. But I need a peptalk, or advice, or something. Any ideas?



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