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Thread: Dating Dealbreakers

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    Default Dating Dealbreakers

    We all have things that will make us refuse to date or get serious with someone. What are your dealbreakers?

    Mine:
    Has kids. This is my number one reason I don't date a guy. I like kids, but do not want the drama of being a stepmother. I would possibly consider a widower, but would prefer not that either. Last on my list are those guys who had kids out of wedlock, especially multiple kids by many women.

    He's unemployed. I know the economy is bad so I can handle a guy who's been unemployed a year or two. I myself am unemployed. I'm talking the guys who have either never held a job, or hasn't worked in many years. I once went out with a guy who hadn't worked in 10 years!

    He's obese. I can handle chubbiness. Really big guys I can't. Some people tell me I am shallow, but it's something I couldn't handle.

    He's chauvinistic, racist, homophobic, etc. I've noticed guys who tend to be one tend to be all of the above. I've broken up with guys who expected my career (whether it was dancing or something else) to come afrer his.

    He's a control freak. I've dated a guy like this and it was horrible.

    He's abusive. It doesn't matter whether it's physical or mental.

    Not really dealbreakers, but I prefer non smokers, Catholic, and never married. In the case of formerly married, it would depend on the circumstances, but if it was a short marriage I could probably deal. Otherwise, probably not. Ironically, the guy I love fits everything except he smokes. I know I have a few other preferences but can't think now.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Is a compulsive liar/cheater.

    An asshole to everyone.

    Has kids. I love children, but I do not want a man with one.

    Is divorced(although, right now... I am making an exception for someone)

    Has exes still hanging around. I don't want excess bagagge. I don't have any myself.

    Small COCK!! Oh hellz no. He better be stacked.

    Smokes.

    Does drugs. Not even if it's on occassions.

    Has a drinking or gambling problem.

    Smells, is dirty, bad breath.

    Is too fat or too skinny.

    Can't fuck for shit.

    A bigot.

    Is a lazy smooching bum.

    Broke, no job.

    Has a personality of a toolbox.


    Yeah, I wont settle for less. lol

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    Veteran Member jennsweet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    bad in bed DEALBUSTER, even if he scores high in all other depts. wtf am i going to do with that?

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Dude has to be honest, open to communication, and trusting.

    CAN NOT SMOKE or do drugs. No way.

    Also, religion is a dealbreaker. Causes way too many problems down the line.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    dealbrakers:

    uses any drug more than recreationally or hard drugs at any time

    unemployed, lazy, not even trying to work but comfortably living off nothing

    kids. im too young to deal with that.

    asshole to everyone

    dont treat me right. if it doesnt happen you can never change it. just gets worse down the track.

    has any very strong beliefs eg racism, homophobe etc i disagree with

    discourages me from doing things i like to get a proper career

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    God/dess Mr Hyde's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    We all have things that will make us refuse to date or get serious with someone. What are your dealbreakers?

    Mine:
    Has kids. This is my number one reason I don't date a guy. I like kids, but do not want the drama of being a stepmother. I would possibly consider a widower, but would prefer not that either. Last on my list are those guys who had kids out of wedlock, especially multiple kids by many women.

    He's unemployed. I know the economy is bad so I can handle a guy who's been unemployed a year or two. I myself am unemployed. I'm talking the guys who have either never held a job, or hasn't worked in many years. I once went out with a guy who hadn't worked in 10 years!

    He's obese. I can handle chubbiness. Really big guys I can't. Some people tell me I am shallow, but it's something I couldn't handle.

    He's chauvinistic, racist, homophobic, etc. I've noticed guys who tend to be one tend to be all of the above. I've broken up with guys who expected my career (whether it was dancing or something else) to come afrer his.

    He's a control freak. I've dated a guy like this and it was horrible.

    He's abusive. It doesn't matter whether it's physical or mental.

    Not really dealbreakers, but I prefer non smokers, Catholic, and never married. In the case of formerly married, it would depend on the circumstances, but if it was a short marriage I could probably deal. Otherwise, probably not. Ironically, the guy I love fits everything except he smokes. I know I have a few other preferences but can't think now.
    I wish you could teach young girls how to choose men.

    It's amazing how any girls can allow some deadbeat with many kids by multiple women can allow themselves to get knocked up by such a specimen, but it apparently happens often.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    He's obese. I can handle chubbiness. Really big guys I can't. Some people tell me I am shallow, but it's something I couldn't handle.
    I don't think that's shallow. It's not just about how someone looks- if I love someone I hope they also love themselves enough to stay healthy (I know this isn't always within someone's control). But I wouldn't want to watch my life partner struggle with heart problems, diabetes, or any of the other problems that can accompany obesity.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Yeah, I gotta add obesity on there too. I can handle a little extra weight, but if you can't see your own dick, then it's no-go.

    Also, for some reason I can't stand military guys. Most girls drool all over them, I avoid them like the plague.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    on the flipside.

    no ambition and pushover - i need a strong ambitious woman.

    dependent - if she's not independent, i'll go nuts

    shallow, uncultured, or flat out uneducated - i consider myself a know it all. if im not doing work on my comp, i'm researching everything and everything. i thrive on knowledge and educated conversation. i know everything you need to know about Canadian History, geography. i have my car licence, motorcycle licence, truck licence, i just recently got my wings....it's all about knowledge for me.

    and that's it

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    I think it's pretty interesting that most picked things I reject people on. I guess I'm not alone with my definite no's. The kid one came about from having dated guys with kids. Bad situation. Actually all of them came from situations I saw.


    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Hyde View Post
    I wish you could teach young girls how to choose men.

    It's amazing how any girls can allow some deadbeat with many kids by multiple women can allow themselves to get knocked up by such a specimen, but it apparently happens often.
    I don't get it myself. I have a friend who "dated" (for lack of a better word, more of a fwb) a guy who many kids. Of course he never married any of the mothers and all were on welfare. Guess what happened next? Yep, she got pregnant and is now on welfare herself (though she's using it to better herself so I don't fault her for that). I run everytime I meet a guy with multiple kids. I'm not interested in dating dads, but could see many years from now making an exception. Multiple baby mommas I couldn't. I admit though I haven't always been the best when it came to choosing guys. I dated a few losers, but luckily I never had children with them (I probably would have had an abortion if I had but who knows).

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    ....and it's gotta be a pretty dick too! no odd shaped weird looking cocks plz

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Biggest dealbreaker for me is stupidity. And that isn't just for dating either.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    -Any kind of religion is a deal breaker, mostly because i know i could not keep myself from making fun of it or being disrespectful.

    -Stupidity, this includes things like typing in retard speak or acting like reading for fun is for aliens.

    -Conservative, sorry could not deal with someone i disagree with on absolutely every single thing ever.

    -Over weight, i'm with Kelly on this one i don't care if it's shallow but if there is no physical attraction then there is no point to having a relationship

    -Ugly feet, yeah sorry but it's a deal breaker for me.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    I have to agree with the stupidity. I can't tolerate people like this.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Dealbreakers:

    Boring.
    Fat.
    Christian.
    Judgmental.
    Chronic illness.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    I notice many say they wouldn't date someone religious and that's interesting. I will admit I am not deeply religious, but would prefer someone who's a moderate over someone who's not religious at all. I couldn't tolerate a fundamentalist (they wouldn't approve of me either having been a stripper, and a moderate feminist).

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Well i singled it out because it's more common than say believing in unicorns or other silly nonsensical bs. There are a lot of people who say "i belong to such and such religion" if you asked them because that's how they were raised and it would be a Big Deal to say anything else but they don't go to church or let it affect their lives or their views in any way. I would have no problem with that really, it's the ones for whom religion is an important part of their lives i could not tolerate, fundamentalist or otherwise.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Quote Originally Posted by Trem View Post
    Well i singled it out because it's more common than say believing in unicorns or other silly nonsensical bs. There are a lot of people who say "i belong to such and such religion" if you asked them because that's how they were raised and it would be a Big Deal to say anything else but they don't go to church or let it affect their lives or their views in any way. I would have no problem with that really, it's the ones for whom religion is an important part of their lives i could not tolerate, fundamentalist or otherwise.
    I once dated a guy who belonged to a very conservative church (I think they might have been fundies). He wasn't conservative, nor were his parents, but the church was another story. A bunch of racist, sexist, homophobic nuts. They disapproved of women working, black people having management jobs, gay people existing, secular movies, even Disney movies (I wish I was kidding). The girls in this church were brought up that their role in life was the make babies and be a submissive wife and mother. My ex told me stories of weddings at their church where they sat around eating after the reception because they didn't believe in dancing or drinking booze (my ex did both). I could never handle this and eventually we broke up because of his church (though he left the church and we are still friends).

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    It's amazing there are still people like that around in the civilized parts of the world. At least he managed to get away from them.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    I was happy when he told me he left and so did his parents. This group of thugs ganged up on me when I said I intended to work if I marry, telling me I am a "heathen". They banned me from the church and when he told his mother what they did, she said they needed to come into this century (his mom is a nurse).

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    What made them even worse was they had the view they were right because the bible says so! My ex brought a Beach Boys cd to a dance and the minister called him a heathen because my ex didn't just listen to Christian music. In a sick irony one of their pastors got arrested because he pulled a cap off a woman because she didn't pay on time (he was a dentist). Real Christian views there.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers



    Anyone with any of these characteristics.

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    ^That guy is a joke-My cousin loves guys like that.

    Deal breakers-
    -Lives with parents. I can understand going through hard times though. If you're past the age of 20-23 you SHOULD NOT be at home. End of story. I've been out on my own for years now and I'm 21.
    -Cocky. NO thank you.
    -Bad taste in music. Music is very important to me.
    -Bad sense of humor.
    -Small weiner.
    -Smelly,unkempt.
    -Ignorant,uneducated. I would rather date a not so good looking smart man than a very attractive idiot.
    -Bad work ethic.
    -Absolutely NO DRUGS.
    -Abrasive and abusive.
    -Men who are caught up on their looks. ie, I'm too short. I'm too skinny..etc..
    -Intolerant about other religions and ways of life.
    -Insecure.
    ..Thats all I can think of. I can deal with some of these-but not all of them in one guy!

    Things I don't mind.
    -Kids. I have one,so I wouldn't care a kid or two..Just not 5 or 6 kids with numerous baby mommas..one of them is bound to be crazy.
    -Not a lot of money. As long as he's trying to get some where in life.
    -Looks. He doesn't have to be Brad Pitt (Although I don't find him very attractive,but you get my drift)
    -Religious. As long as he respects what I believe.
    -Messy. As long as it's untidy and not filthy.
    -Smoking. I smoke.
    Last edited by Spankie55; 07-11-2010 at 05:59 AM. Reason: I forgotted one :)
    I is a mommy.
    09.27.09

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    Default Re: Dating Dealbreakers

    Quote Originally Posted by Spankie55 View Post
    ^That guy is a joke-My cousin loves guys like that.
    Sad to say but lots of girls do. I know plenty of guys like that, girls practically throw themselves at their dicks.

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