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Thread: When men get lazy and drop thier act

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    Default When men get lazy and drop thier act

    So I am common law with my BF of now two and some years. I would say four to five months ago he'd given up "the act".

    I feel that he no longer contributes to our relationship. How he is acting now sertainly isn't what I fell in love with!!! Miss-representing yourself to the point of lieing about your morals, life asspirations, goals etc.......it's like a rock in my heart.

    So do we drop him like a piece of Lead, or is there a way to stear his behavior towards correction.

    I want to ask him why he isn't acting like a man anymore?

    How do I extract myself in a mature manner?

    Thanks ladies.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    So what is he doing that is "dropping the ball", so to speak? Can you give us a more in depth description of his actions, mannerisms, etc? What is he doing, or Not doing that is bothering you the most? I'm just trying to get a clearer picture of what is actually going on. Thanks

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    God/dess Arialandre's Avatar
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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    ^ Ditto. But in the end I will probably say ditch him.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    LOL- That was funny!

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Just coming home and not contributing to the upkeep of the home. He is a slob. Blatantly drinking in front of me ( I am a non drinker & he a confessed alki...of course the type that doesn't need a support group). Not wanting to spend quality time together outside of the bedroom. Griping about how expensive it is to go out for a nice dinner ( modest Tapas) while he throws his paycheque away............being unsupportive of my working scheule.

    Things to this nature..... then he slams me with how bitchy I've become. Ya... I moved in with a man, meanwhile he's acting like he wants a maid/nanny instead of a girlfriend.

    He can be sweet, but for four mnths the negative really overpowers the good.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Ditch the asshole,Arialandre is right- lolol. No, seriously, it sounds like maybe he hasa drinkin prob & it's gettin worse? I dated an asshole who decided that the house had to be perfect & nothing was ever good enuf, they suck. LAY DOWN THE LAW! But first, try to talk to him as a friend. If he refuses to listen, then take action. Throw him out or leave yourself, let him know you are miserable & that you want respect & mean business! Men can be such jeks, can't live with or without them (unless you make twice as much as them-hehehe!)

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    If he picked up his game would you still want to be with him? Or did the relationship die beyond revival? There lies the answer.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Only men who are lying aka "acting" drop their act. So you have to decide if you want to be in a relationship with an "actor."
    Quote Originally Posted by SkyDancer1985 View Post
    Should I get tested?? What if it got on my labia? k. Sorry for going off subject.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Nope... (I)do not want to be with an Actor & yes, if he pulled up his Pants along with seeking Sobriety that would be ideal.

    Thanks everyone.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    we ll anica left me and just 4 the record in those 4 months she was referring 2 where the bad out wayed the good my father died in april that would have been month 1. 4 the next 3 she was in town aprox 3 weeks total .so yes i griped about her work schedule if it wasnt 4 the fact she pissed off most of the agents and club managers in our home town that never would have been the case.i had 2 beg the owners 2 let her work at my club until the last straw when i pulled in another favour and she blew off the gig so she could go 2 the island with another g.she said it was her mother, the day b4 my bday.in those same 4 months i got a very good promotion and had 2 switch 2 night shifts.cant drink b4 shift only enough time 4 1 drink after work.lets c dining out never have i complained about the expense im the kind of guy who says excuse me i need 2 use the restroom finds the waitress or waiter and pays the bill 2 avoid the akwardness of fighting over who pays when it shows up at the table that includes when we are out with another couple.she s offered me thousands of dollars 2 get my teeth worked on i turned her down flat every time its my problem i ll pay 4 it myself thank u very much.as 2 being a slob yes i am tried and true thats y id pay 2 have our home cleaned spic and span every time she came home from the road so it would b nice and clean and at least once a week while she was in town or out .in the last while she s been drinking assulting people 2 the point of police detainment telling some poor guy in yellow knife she loves him all the while she s sleeping with me.did i mention we lost a baby and were going 2 get married b4 that tragic loss that was in october 2010 just b4 she left.just thought u would all like an update

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by Anica Green View Post
    Nope... (I)do not want to be with an Actor & yes, if he pulled up his Pants along with seeking Sobriety that would be ideal.

    Thanks everyone.
    If he did that it would just be an act again, do you really want to be with someone who is only pretending to be what you want him to be?

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    ewwww. he came to the site to tell us his side of the story. i hate it when they do that. i don't care who's telling the truth, or if you're both lying. if you've got that many issues, you obviously were bad as a couple. both of you can find someone more suited to you.
    -love everyone but keep them far from your soul-

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    Featured Member noelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by evilmofo View Post
    we ll anica left me and just 4 the record in those 4 months she was referring 2 where the bad out wayed the good my father died in april that would have been month 1. 4 the next 3 she was in town aprox 3 weeks total .so yes i griped about her work schedule if it wasnt 4 the fact she pissed off most of the agents and club managers in our home town that never would have been the case.i had 2 beg the owners 2 let her work at my club until the last straw when i pulled in another favour and she blew off the gig so she could go 2 the island with another g.she said it was her mother, the day b4 my bday.in those same 4 months i got a very good promotion and had 2 switch 2 night shifts.cant drink b4 shift only enough time 4 1 drink after work.lets c dining out never have i complained about the expense im the kind of guy who says excuse me i need 2 use the restroom finds the waitress or waiter and pays the bill 2 avoid the akwardness of fighting over who pays when it shows up at the table that includes when we are out with another couple.she s offered me thousands of dollars 2 get my teeth worked on i turned her down flat every time its my problem i ll pay 4 it myself thank u very much.as 2 being a slob yes i am tried and true thats y id pay 2 have our home cleaned spic and span every time she came home from the road so it would b nice and clean and at least once a week while she was in town or out .in the last while she s been drinking assulting people 2 the point of police detainment telling some poor guy in yellow knife she loves him all the while she s sleeping with me.did i mention we lost a baby and were going 2 get married b4 that tragic loss that was in october 2010 just b4 she left.just thought u would all like an update

    WHAT????? Translation please? Anyone?

    Or is this a math problem... I'm seeing a lot of numbers.

    God, I hate when the dude comes on here to tell "his side of the story".
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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    the nature of reality is that it doesnt change only our perceptions of it do.you cant truly love someone unless you can accept them warts and all .we dont love someone because they're perfect no one is .we love because of the flaws that are a crucial part of what make us who we are .if you were to get close enough to the ceiling of the sistine chapel you would see only the flaws .one must step back to experience the wonder and awe of the artists creation.our tried and true closest friends that have withstood the test of time our still there because we share the same flaws .who else can truly understand us and forgive us but our true peers.if they were the twelve in the jury box we'd never be found guilty.your honor in light of the evidence and circumstances we the jury would have done the exact same thing not guilty.if only the ones we take as lovers and the ones who take us as the same could do the same.we sleep with strangers and then we grow to love them but the friendships we cherish with members of the opposite sex are too precious to risk sex screwing it all up.yes the pun was intended.i will love anica til the earth crumbles and the stars fall from the heavens but i could never be with her again .not for the lies but for the fact i cant trust her anymore.i loved her completely if it wasnt for her flaws i never would have.the skin trade is a voracious beast unless the beast dwells within you it will consume you completely.i am reconciled to the demon that dwells within me .if you cant come to terms with a trade that thrives on addiction the hypocrisy will destroy ones soul.ive seen many people in my 25 years fall prey to the beast i fear she might be one of them. run girl run you are a godess dont let your world change you change your world.much love snookie

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Remember, spell checker is your friend.

    Honestly, this thread makes no sense to me at all. Is Evilmofo isn't doing his fair share around the house I can see why the op is mad. Same thing with drinking. I dated an alcoholic and I would never date a guy who was a heavy drinker.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    This thread took a detour through Dramaville straight into awesome town.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Wow! I didn't know that there was a forum on here where my bf and I could argue instead of having a face to face conversation like adults! Yippee! (though to her credit, it looks like Anica left after he appeared..)

    Seriously though - sounds like this relationship had a LOT of issues, and the fact that this guy has felt the need to enter an area where she is looking for advice to try and "defend" himself is a big red flag. I think that if she has left him, it is probably better for them both that way...it doesn't sound like this was going well, by any means.

    And evilmofo - please, please understand that most of the women on here are intelligent and articulate (and opinionated! love it...), therefore, in order to enter into a reasonable discussion with us, you should present your argument logically and coherently. Digits are not words. Punctuation does matter, because I can barely understand your second post. Seriously dude...you aren't gaining any respect by coming into your ex's online community and rambling incoherently.
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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by Trem View Post
    This thread took a detour through Dramaville straight into awesome town.
    DAM....I just laughed so hard...

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    the reason for the first post was childish anger spurred on by the audacity of of her looking to complete strangers for advice on such a personal issue.i sincerely regret doing it im certainly not proud of it and this will be my final post.as to the second i was simply trying to set the record straight on how i feel .im not big punctuation on punctuation but if you read more you just might get the references.be that as it may in matters of the heart and soul your intelligence doesnt really come into play .more pointedly during a break up you dont act you react for a time im still reacting. it will pass its a phase.as to this being a community if by that you mean a far flung diaspora of naked dilettantes doling out desultry advice based on ignorance .then sure why not your a community.good luck with that

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    We don't know who you are so while you're here to defend you "pride" and "honor"...eh. It doesn't matter. It really doesn't. You're just one out of hundreds of shitty guys or gals that the ladies come here to vent about. And this is an old thread at that.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by Anica Green View Post
    Just coming home and not contributing to the upkeep of the home. He is a slob. Blatantly drinking in front of me ( I am a non drinker & he a confessed alki...of course the type that doesn't need a support group). Not wanting to spend quality time together outside of the bedroom. Griping about how expensive it is to go out for a nice dinner ( modest Tapas) while he throws his paycheque away............being unsupportive of my working scheule.

    Things to this nature..... then he slams me with how bitchy I've become. Ya... I moved in with a man, meanwhile he's acting like he wants a maid/nanny instead of a girlfriend.

    He can be sweet, but for four mnths the negative really overpowers the good.
    Bold part is all I need to know to be able to tell you it won't work out ever. The most mature way is to be honest and upfront. If you are worried about your safety, you may need to take more extreme measures.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Oh my goodness! Nevermind, I should have read through the whole thread before responding

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Sounds like my most recent ex. I found his behaviour unattractive, and then him, so we split, and I feel better for it.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by evilmofo View Post
    as to this being a community if by that you mean a far flung diaspora of naked dilettantes doling out desultry advice based on ignorance .then sure why not your a community.good luck with that
    Oooooh, wow, so many big words!!! Me just a stoopid stripper, me just use titties for everything, i not know how to reed big words.

    Although I do know how to use proper punctuation. I learned in FIRST GRADE.

    You're wicked emo, dude. That's not attractive.

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    Default Re: When men get lazy and drop thier act

    Quote Originally Posted by evilmofo View Post
    the reason for the first post was childish anger spurred on by the audacity of of her looking to complete strangers for advice on such a personal issue.i sincerely regret doing it im certainly not proud of it and this will be my final post.as to the second i was simply trying to set the record straight on how i feel .im not big punctuation on punctuation but if you read more you just might get the references.be that as it may in matters of the heart and soul your intelligence doesnt really come into play .more pointedly during a break up you dont act you react for a time im still reacting. it will pass its a phase.as to this being a community if by that you mean a far flung diaspora of naked dilettantes doling out desultry advice based on ignorance .then sure why not your a community.good luck with that
    We do not tolerate people joining SW to discuss drama with their ex, their ex's sex life post breakup, etc. While there are always two sides to every story, find somewhere else to tell yours.
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