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Thread: 911 now

  1. #1
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
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    Default 911 now

    I can't vouch for the veracity of this story, but I was talking to a friend of mine from Santa Fe. Last night a naked man wearing a paper bag over his head was masturbating on her front porch. Alarmed she called 911. The operator followed standard procedure, it seems. Maybe a little too much. The dispatcher asked if she could please describe any distinguishing characteristics about the suspect, as well as clothing. This was after she told the operator about the unclothed suspect. She was asked to describe the paper bag in more specific terms.... Jesus. I got a good laugh outta this. Anyone have any crazy 911 stories?
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Veteran Member Autumn Lily's Avatar
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    Default Re: 911 now

    One of my best friends works as a 911 dispatcher. On 4/20 he overheard a call in which a stoned teenager called, saying.

    "Yes, hello? I... I need help. I need help fast. I'm behind the dumpster at Burger King, and... well, I'm not gonna lie, I've smoked a LOT of pot... and I-- oh god. Oh GOD."

    "Yes, sir? Sir? What is it?"

    "I... I think I hear Jesus. HOLY FUCK I HEAR JESUS. OH GOD I NEED HELP SEND SOMEONE."

    My friend had to take his headset off and step away from the calling board for a bit to laugh his ass off.

  3. #3
    SpeakngEZ
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    Default Re: 911 now

    (the cop and brownies)

  4. #4
    God/dess Kisca's Avatar
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    Default Re: 911 now

    911 dispatchers make me wonder.. I feel like their.. high or something of the questions they ask.

    If I ever called 911 I would make say something such as "Im being chased by a knife" just to reduce all the retard questions. Plus cops take their damn time here if its not "important" for them.

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