




To be honest these people scare me more than swingers/people in open relationships because they are making more of a mockery of marriage than those who sleep with others. I've seen far too many kids destroyed because their one parent left the other for another person.
I hope you do the same for her. I've known guys who expected their wives to still be hot yet they got fat. It goes both ways.
Clingy people in general scare me and have dumped guys who are like this. I don't want to be with someone like that. In an irony the guy I love used to be like that but is the opposite now and I hate both extremes.
It's funny you mention marriage being like a partnership because I was reading something that I often forget. The idea of a marriage based on love is fairly new. In the past (and it's hasn't been that long) people of upper class families were often either arranged to marry someone else, or even "suggested" they marry a particular person. Many times love never happened and the man had a mistress, and many times he really loved her instead of the wife. In many cases the wife knew about her and didn't care because it meant he would have sex with her less (which meant less kids). The mistress sometimes even lived with him and had many kids. Even if the wife didn't approve of this she had no choice. Of course women didn't usually have the same options because of the whole pregnancy situation. Personally, I like the idea of a marriage where both people can sleep with others than a marriage where only the man could.





salemsexy, you took my hypothetical completely out of context.
First of all, I do believe in "love" - but I believe it works like this - "love" starts out as a sort of infatuation, where "nothing else matters". He could be a loveable loser, mediocre intelligence, no job, no career goals, etc. - just a half-way decent looking dude with an old guitar and a love song for you. You will look past all his issues and be madly in "love" with him. Over time, though (1, 5, 10 or 15 years) the infatuation wears off and the relationship evolves into a more intelligent and practical partnership. (I.e., he needs to get his shit together.)
Second, Angelina Jolie was just an example (chosen for obvious reasons). After being married for 5 or 10 years, someone can come along that is younger and prettier (these are just two factors, though), shares your husband's hobbies, career goals, passions, whatever... for whatever infinite possibilities - he might find himself more attracted to her and more compatible with her. My point is that every woman will want to fight to keep her husband, even if the chance exists that (for whatever reason) he might be happier with his new prospect.
This is normal - this is jealousy. In a "perfect" 0% jealousy world, it would be very different - the wife would encourage the husband to seek the greatest happiness (and vice versa)- even if that means he will pursue another romatic interest and leave her.
Again, I am not arguing in favor of this "perfect" 0% jealousy world, I'm saying just the opposite - jealousy (in modest amounts) is good.
Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
- Oscar Wilde



It's really tragic how much grief and trouble people go through based on some idea of what "the" rules are for relationships and marriage. The dancer felt betrayed according to her definition of betrayal, it's just that simple. If she never TALKED about it with her husband, about what she thought it meant to be faithful in their marriage, that's very sad for the both of them. If your signinficant other breaks a "rule" that the two of you never discussed, it's a least partly your mistake.
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