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Thread: Remember me?

  1. #1
    Veteran Member Qi's Avatar
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    Smiley Remember me?

    lots of you guys helped me with my boy drama and I'm happy to say I've moved on!

    I currently live with my new boyfriend, away from my family (Who are currently in TX). He owns his own house, works everyday at his fam. owned auto-repair shop, takes care of me, get me whatever I want etc. etc., but I don't do anything besides chill at home, cook, clean when I'm bored, etc. He never asks anything of me though.

    I was offered a job on the spot at one of the nicer strip joints here (coincidentally, the manager there is friends with my bf), which is only about 5 - 7 mins away from my house, but my boyfriend refuses to let me dance. I want to make my own money, and stripping is something I've wanted to do for quite some time now. I'd go there on my own but I don't even have a car! He chauffeurs me to every place I go.

    How could I convince him to allow me to dance? He says he's been thinking on it and may change his mind, but I want him to change it asap!!!

    Has anyone else been in this situation?

  2. #2
    SpeakngEZ
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    It seems like you've got it pretty good and don't really NEED stripping money. Why not get a regular job? You'll have your own money and won't be screwing up something really good.

    If he changes his mind, go for it. But if he doesn't like it now, don't expect that to ever change. It will always be a source of stress for him and may lead to your break-up.

    Don't forget it's going to feel really degrading for him to have to drive you there. (Degrading to him.) Consider taking a cab the second day.

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  4. #3
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    It seems like you've got it pretty good and don't really NEED stripping money. Why not get a regular job? You'll have your own money and won't be screwing up something really good.

    -I second that !

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    God/dess Athenathefabulous's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    hey beautiful

    well im glad you ditched the first loser. i dont remember the specifics, but i remember they were bad and i remember wondering why a pretty girl like you was settling.

    personally, i think being in a position where you depend on one person to get you everywhere is not a good thing. im assuming this new boy treats you very well? if he changes his mind go for it, but if not, i second getting another job. but if dancing is something you REALLY want to do and he is in the way of it, then you have to weight how much you want to dance vs. how much you like your relationship.

    are you in school?

    it sounds like you are not content with being a house-girlfriend though. you should try to find a way to change that. are you in a city where it makes sense to use a bike for transportation? (NOT to and from the SC though, that can be dangerous). you can get bikes for cheap at a pawn shop... or you can do 'free rental' at walmart where you buy a bike and save the reciept, use the bike to get you to and from a new job (again not a SC) until you have more money, then return the bike (i think you have 3 weeks to do this? and you can use any excuse, last time i did this i told them i was too pretty for the bike) and use the money for a better bike. because the walmart bikes wont last much longer than past the return date lol.

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    Veteran Member oxSkylarxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    hey beautiful

    well im glad you ditched the first loser. i dont remember the specifics, but i remember they were bad and i remember wondering why a pretty girl like you was settling.

    personally, i think being in a position where you depend on one person to get you everywhere is not a good thing. im assuming this new boy treats you very well? if he changes his mind go for it, but if not, i second getting another job. but if dancing is something you REALLY want to do and he is in the way of it, then you have to weight how much you want to dance vs. how much you like your relationship.

    are you in school?

    it sounds like you are not content with being a house-girlfriend though. you should try to find a way to change that. are you in a city where it makes sense to use a bike for transportation? (NOT to and from the SC though, that can be dangerous). you can get bikes for cheap at a pawn shop... or you can do 'free rental' at walmart where you buy a bike and save the reciept, use the bike to get you to and from a new job (again not a SC) until you have more money, then return the bike (i think you have 3 weeks to do this? and you can use any excuse, last time i did this i told them i was too pretty for the bike) and use the money for a better bike. because the walmart bikes wont last much longer than past the return date lol.
    Do you not have public transportation where you are at? That is what I do. I don't have a car either.

  8. #6
    God/dess Athenathefabulous's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    i have yet to live in a city where public transportation was good enough to entirely depend on. except for maybe denver.

  9. #7
    Banned malayataylor's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Were you dancing before? Why don't you have your own place or money to get your own place with. Why don't you have a car? it's one thing if you don't need one. I know dancers that are loaded that don't have a car because they don't need it but YOU need one.

    Why are you hopping from house to house with these men and expecting them to "allow" you to dance?

    a.) Alot of men's brain are not programmed to have a dancer girlfriend.
    b.) Yes he will have to let you dance/or if not WORK a non adult job because you can't bum around the house cooking and cleaning and playing housewife when you're not one.

    Sure he gives you want you want. He owns his own business .......this is awesome! It really is. How long have you been with this guy? Well, Being that he's not your "husband" you should find a job whether in the strip club or not. Some men are naturally bipolar.. you can be with them for 5 years drama free then all the sudden out of nowhere all hell breaks loose. the guy you described is the ideal man to you but to me he is the average joe blow. His money is really not that "long".

    Please go and get a job this man is not your husband and he has not obligation to you. You will feel better when you are making up your own money. This time please try to save money for your own place. Qi, You're smart and beautiful you shouldn't be house hoppin. It is NOT right. Another thing is men love women that have their own.

    Me? I couldn't do it. I couldn't let a man tell me what to do ESPECIALLY one that had nothing to do with my birth. I couldn't live with a man and just be a housewife unless he was Richard Gere and even then I know I'd want to continue working. I also have a new boyfriend and he lets me do what I want. He understand that if he can't give more at least 5k a month I will work (escort and cam). You should never rely on a man's earnings because guess what? That house you both are living in it's not in your name he can put you out anytime. His money is not your money.. you do not have a joint account with him... That's HIS shit! When he leaves you on the roadside tomorrow what are you going to do? ummmmmm find another man to leave up under? NO.

    SO start finding a job now and do not try to convince him to let you strip because he already has his mind set on not letting you strip. Don't blame him.. you chose to move in with him. I mean, you ARE living with him SO find something else whether it's waitressing or even CAM. If your new beau doesn't agree with you camming then you should re-evaluate that relationship.

    Good luck hun!

  10. #8
    SpeakngEZ
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    Quote Originally Posted by malayataylor View Post
    If your new beau doesn't agree with you camming then you should re-evaluate that relationship.
    Eh, my DBF had a bigger problem with me camming than dancing because it was in our personal space and because what I was doing in front of the cam was a lot more sexual than what I was doing in the club (that is, a lot closer to his idea of cheating).

  11. #9
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Dependency = NOT GOOD

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  13. #10
    Banned malayataylor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SpeakngEZ View Post
    Eh, my DBF had a bigger problem with me camming than dancing because it was in our personal space and because what I was doing in front of the cam was a lot more sexual than what I was doing in the club (that is, a lot closer to his idea of cheating).
    Camming is closer to cheating than dancing? WOW. Well that's the kind of guy you chose to be with my dear. My last boyfriend agreed with my job but he was just hell to be with. I like my current just fine. We were looking at escort ads together last night and plotting on how I can take over boston. Trust me those kind of men are out there. You just have to know what you want and TELL THEM what you are looking for.

    I couldn't be with a man that didn't want me to make a living. I would be totally depressed. If I have learned anything from my mom it's don't put a man before your happiness and sanity.

  14. #11
    Veteran Member Qi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Quote Originally Posted by malayataylor View Post
    Were you dancing before? Why don't you have your own place or money to get your own place with. Why don't you have a car? it's one thing if you don't need one. I know dancers that are loaded that don't have a car because they don't need it but YOU need one.

    Why are you hopping from house to house with these men and expecting them to "allow" you to dance?

    a.) Alot of men's brain are not programmed to have a dancer girlfriend.
    b.) Yes he will have to let you dance/or if not WORK a non adult job because you can't bum around the house cooking and cleaning and playing housewife when you're not one.

    Sure he gives you want you want. He owns his own business .......this is awesome! It really is. How long have you been with this guy? Well, Being that he's not your "husband" you should find a job whether in the strip club or not. Some men are naturally bipolar.. you can be with them for 5 years drama free then all the sudden out of nowhere all hell breaks loose. the guy you described is the ideal man to you but to me he is the average joe blow. His money is really not that "long".

    Please go and get a job this man is not your husband and he has not obligation to you. You will feel better when you are making up your own money. This time please try to save money for your own place. Qi, You're smart and beautiful you shouldn't be house hoppin. It is NOT right. Another thing is men love women that have their own.

    Me? I couldn't do it. I couldn't let a man tell me what to do ESPECIALLY one that had nothing to do with my birth. I couldn't live with a man and just be a housewife unless he was Richard Gere and even then I know I'd want to continue working. I also have a new boyfriend and he lets me do what I want. He understand that if he can't give more at least 5k a month I will work (escort and cam). You should never rely on a man's earnings because guess what? That house you both are living in it's not in your name he can put you out anytime. His money is not your money.. you do not have a joint account with him... That's HIS shit! When he leaves you on the roadside tomorrow what are you going to do? ummmmmm find another man to leave up under? NO.

    SO start finding a job now and do not try to convince him to let you strip because he already has his mind set on not letting you strip. Don't blame him.. you chose to move in with him. I mean, you ARE living with him SO find something else whether it's waitressing or even CAM. If your new beau doesn't agree with you camming then you should re-evaluate that relationship.

    Good luck hun!
    Well actually I haven't been house hopping. i've been living with my fam for 18 years, and this is the first time i've moved out. with my last ex, we just were together very often, and were talking about me moving in lol.

    But thanks, I undertand everything you're saying. Like other ladies suggest getting a normal job, that's not something I want. I really want to dance again, it's making money for being ME. Being a sexual, sensual, woman of perfection in the eyes of others. I love stripping and just can't stop.

    However, I may just get a normal job and save up for my own car THEN i will start dancing ahahah.


    Thanks girls, I always can depend on ya'll!

  15. #12
    Banned malayataylor's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qi View Post
    Well actually I haven't been house hopping. i've been living with my fam for 18 years, and this is the first time i've moved out. with my last ex, we just were together very often, and were talking about me moving in lol.

    But thanks, I undertand everything you're saying. Like other ladies suggest getting a normal job, that's not something I want. I really want to dance again, it's making money for being ME. Being a sexual, sensual, woman of perfection in the eyes of others. I love stripping and just can't stop.

    However, I may just get a normal job and save up for my own car THEN i will start dancing ahahah.


    Thanks girls, I always can depend on ya'll!
    Good luck hun! Hope it all works out for you

  16. #13
    SpeakngEZ
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    Quote Originally Posted by malayataylor View Post
    Camming is closer to cheating than dancing? WOW. Well that's the kind of guy you chose to be with my dear. My last boyfriend agreed with my job but he was just hell to be with. I like my current just fine. We were looking at escort ads together last night and plotting on how I can take over boston. Trust me those kind of men are out there. You just have to know what you want and TELL THEM what you are looking for.

    I couldn't be with a man that didn't want me to make a living. I would be totally depressed. If I have learned anything from my mom it's don't put a man before your happiness and sanity.
    I didn't say he wasn't letting me. I'm saying he had a harder time dealing with it. No man is perfect and I can't force him to feel okay with everything I'm doing. I'm not okay with everything he does or wants to do, either. We compromise and we're happy for it.

    ETA: and yes, I agree with DBF. I think that letting a slew of guys watch me fuck myself with a dildo while screaming their names is a lot closer to cheating than taking my top off in front of them and dancing around.
    Last edited by SpeakngEZ; 09-16-2010 at 03:19 AM.

  17. #14
    Veteran Member Autumn Lily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Hi Qi!

    Which one were you offered a job at? Please don't say Michelle's. There is NO MONEY at that place anymore. Hasn't been for months. Michelle's lost a good number of her dancers and the club is actually very close to closing down.

  18. #15
    Veteran Member Qi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Remember me?

    Hey!!!! I was offered a job at Jezebel's actually. It's closer to get to and I really like the girls there. They were very very nice and helpful.

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