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Thread: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

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    Default How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Is selling or "hustling" a simple numbers game or do you utilize psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale?

    Other then the obvious (i.e., having a sexy body), what are the most effective psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale in your business?

    Is making the customer think you have a crush on him an effective/lucrative sales technique? I ask this because so many guys come on this forum asking - Does she really like me?

    I would expect that each customer is different and requires a different strategy for closing the deal, but, I am curious about dancer's perspective on this.
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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I listen to them to learn what their interests and hobbies are . Guys like to talk about theirselves. Just be a good listener .Some guys have actually become my very good friends.If they are enjoying the conversation they will spend the money for the dances and the drinks and champagne. Its a great way to build your regulars.Francinista

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Is selling or "hustling" a simple numbers game or do you utilize psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale?
    It depends. For some people its very psychological and for others its strictly a numbers game.
     
    Other then the obvious (i.e., having a sexy body), what are the most effective psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale in your business? Is making the customer think you have a crush on him an effective/lucrative sales technique?
    Making the customer feel special and somehow different from the rest is a major part of being effective and making regulars. It doesn't necessarily have to be in the way you describe. That's just the most obvious method. Romantic attraction makes the mind more pliable and more open to hearing that it's reciprocated. It could be any number of things, though. (Appreciation for their oddball sense of humor or the unique way they touch you or their occasional moodiness that you find so endearing. =You're different to me.) -But whatever sets them apart should have some basis in truth. Some people take serious offense when you set off their bullshit radar with fake flattery.


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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I just try to figure out what type of girl the customer wants ie. innocent, party girl, brain, bimbo, etc. and act the way I think they want me to. I will base this on their appearance and behaviour. Usually older guys want me to seem smart but innocent. Asian guys (they love me so thats why they get their own category) - innocent and quiet. Gang types, alpha males etc. - dumb, party-bimbo. At first Ill just add little things to my core personality and if I get positive reinforcement then I continue.

    I am a high self-monitor anyway - which for those who dont know anything abut psych means I model my behaviour all the time on others reactions and behaviours. I dont do it intentionally, it is part of my personality. High self-monitors often get a bad rap because they can be seen as two-faced due to perception of others that we are changing our personality. But the thing is that it is part of our personality to be flexible and adapt.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I'm not a great "hustler." I'm a good person. Especially compared to 99 percent of the girls at my club. I can hold a conversation with you, remain polite, sober enough to function, and make you laugh. I'm sweet and flirtacious, but not overly fake about it.

    I don't specifically pinpoint guys, psychologically assess them and then go for their weak points for financial gain. This would be smart, I would probably make more money, but there are just too many people and personality types for this to work for me.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    At first Ill just add little things to my core personality and if I get positive reinforcement then I continue.

    This sums it up perfectly. I imagine it would be difficult for people with low self-monitoring to learn to do this well. I think a lot of it is innate. I'm a people-pleaser and a social chameleon and I just don't know how to be any other way.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Nodding yes while asking for a dance is pretty effective. Rubbing their thigh "nonchalantly" while having small talk. Mirroring is a good technique as well...

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jessie_tinydancer View Post
    ....
    I am a high self-monitor anyway - which for those who dont know anything abut psych means I model my behaviour all the time on others reactions and behaviours. I dont do it intentionally, it is part of my personality. High self-monitors often get a bad rap because they can be seen as two-faced due to perception of others that we are changing our personality. But the thing is that it is part of our personality to be flexible and adapt.
    That's very interesting, do you think that top dancers tend to have that characteristic (high self-monitor)?

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by kaiarose View Post
    Nodding yes while asking for a dance is pretty effective. Rubbing their thigh "nonchalantly" while having small talk. Mirroring is a good technique as well...
    That always works very well on me, when dancers touch me in some way when asking if I want a dance. It's like that little spoonful they give you at the ice cream parlor when you're trying to pick your flavor....

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I guess the best 'psychological trick' to use on a customer would be forcing him to become enamored with you...(oh god, the phrasing on that is all off. Excuse me, I just got home for work and I drank tonight). A key building block of attraction is admiration. You need to get the customer to believe that 1) You're the most awesomest person he's ever been in the company of, 2) you and the customer have something in common, that bonds you and gives the illusion of intimacy(usually just a small inside joke builds enough repor to have men feeling this way after a few beers) 3) You are way above him, but he feels like if only he had met you in a coffee shop you two could make it work.

    After I sort of establish the above 3 'truths' of the relationship between myself and a customer, the customer is usually convinced that he's in love with me, and will therefore spend moolah. Mind you, all this shatters the next day when he realized he got played.....some do keep coming back though.

    God I'm going to read this tomorrow and cringe. But I typed it so it's getting posted. I don't care if it doesn't make sense.



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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by 4everresolutions View Post
    I guess the best 'psychological trick' to use on a customer would be forcing him to become enamored with you...(oh god, the phrasing on that is all off. Excuse me, I just got home for work and I drank tonight). A key building block of attraction is admiration. You need to get the customer to believe that 1) You're the most awesomest person he's ever been in the company of, 2) you and the customer have something in common, that bonds you and gives the illusion of intimacy(usually just a small inside joke builds enough repor to have men feeling this way after a few beers) 3) You are way above him, but he feels like if only he had met you in a coffee shop you two could make it work.

    After I sort of establish the above 3 'truths' of the relationship between myself and a customer, the customer is usually convinced that he's in love with me, and will therefore spend moolah. Mind you, all this shatters the next day when he realized he got played.....some do keep coming back though.

    God I'm going to read this tomorrow and cringe. But I typed it so it's getting posted. I don't care if it doesn't make sense.
    Aren't there a lot of guys who just look at you and want some dances? I mean, do you really always have to make it so complicated? Me, I've learned my lesson, I know you would have just poured coffee over my head if I'd put the moves on you in a coffee shop.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    ^ Haha, smart man. Coffee burns. Better stick to strip clubs and cash.

    And no, thankfully I don't have to do that with all men, or I wouldn't make much money. I'll only have 1 or 2 guys a night that I'll have to hustle hard (usually the early guys who come in around 5 or 6). If it's busy and there's lots of men I don't waste time with the hard hustlers, and I dance for the decisive men who know what they want. This is just for when things are slow, but I know he has a credit card in his pocket. Hehehe.



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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    ^ But now that I think about it, a Canadian chick's not gonna waste her Tim Horton's like that, so I'll be doggin you bigtime

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    There is nothing "nonchalant" about rubbing my thigh during small talk, as I'm sure Kaiarose knows bcz she put it in quotes also . But there is psychology involved; you need to wait until the timing is right and we've connected in some little way, and THEN try a little sensual touch. Excuse me, I just need to quickly finish my drink, (meanwhile maybe 1 more touch to seal the deal ?!!) and then we can go in the back and see if we want to be regulars.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    That's very interesting, do you think that top dancers tend to have that characteristic (high self-monitor)?
    I think it helps but in my experience the girls who are the best earners are those who are money hungry and cut throat. You can still be a "wanna dance" girl and be a top earner. I think the girls who end up with whale customers who are spending $1000+ per visit and coming consistently week after week are definitely more inclined to use psychological techniques though. But for some dancers its just too intense and draining, they prefer new customers all the time.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I wonder why these guys are so interested in our psychological tricks.

    More than that... why are we telling them? If they want to know our secrets, at least make them do a little leg work on this terribly public forum.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by laurcon View Post
    I wonder why these guys are so interested in our psychological tricks.

    More than that... why are we telling them? If they want to know our secrets, at least make them do a little leg work on this terribly public forum.
    Don't worry about it. The guys that the "secrets" work on, even if they saw this, will be like "oh, I know I'm really special to Lavender, she's not like these girls, she would never do me like that". People can only con themselves.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    Is selling or "hustling" a simple numbers game or do you utilize psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale?

    Other then the obvious (i.e., having a sexy body), what are the most effective psychological sales techniques or "tricks" to make the sale in your business?

    Is making the customer think you have a crush on him an effective/lucrative sales technique? I ask this because so many guys come on this forum asking - Does she really like me?

    I would expect that each customer is different and requires a different strategy for closing the deal, but, I am curious about dancer's perspective on this.

    for me i allways found the game very simple, guys want to think i want them so i act like i do.

    It's all a game of course like taking candy from a baby. I play like i want them like them and think there hot , give them the attention they need and there wallets open..

    and yes also a numbers game.. I allways worked in busy clubs so there have allways been so many guys in the club it was easy to look at them like numbers and those numbers works for me.

    of course i like and want my customers lol there paying me but when the nights over and club is closing they need to go home cause im not going to there house or out to hang with them.. But they wish thats how you make alot of money!!

    Feed the males ego..This is my exp anyways.. and for the last 10 years it has not failed me.

    It's like getting cold im a sexy way. A stripper needs to be a master player while shes working and when she leave shes a whole diff person until her next shift.
    The world is full of anything you want if you just go take it! Just keep your hands off my kitty!

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    Don't worry about it. The guys that the "secrets" work on, even if they saw this, will be like "oh, I know I'm really special to Lavender, she's not like these girls, she would never do me like that". People can only con themselves.

    thats a fantastic point even i never looked at it that way but it's true! I have had many guys who knew i was playing the other customers and would giggle to me saying im glad you don't play me lol...

    they don't want to believe it's happening to them and thatd when you know a dancers game is good!!
    The world is full of anything you want if you just go take it! Just keep your hands off my kitty!

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by ilbbaicnl View Post
    Don't worry about it. The guys that the "secrets" work on, even if they saw this, will be like "oh, I know I'm really special to Lavender, she's not like these girls, she would never do me like that". People can only con themselves.
    Well, I don't necessarily think my customers are that stupid at all. You do bring up a good point though in that I shouldn't be concerned however. The types of customers I have and want would never come on these boards, or talk to anyone who did come on here, about strippers at least.
    It's kind of just the point of it. Well, more than that, I couldn't eat at all yesterday because of a procedure this morning so I was def crabby.

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I am very impressed with the sales techniques revealed in this thread!

    Quote Originally Posted by laurcon View Post
    I wonder why these guys are so interested in our psychological tricks.
    More than that... why are we telling them?
    Human psychology is very interesting to me, and how it is applied in the SC is fascinating. There have been a few dancers with whom I have felt stronger attraction than others. Now, I can detect their "tricks" and say - "I know what you're doing - Damn, you're good!"

    From the dancer's POV - What's wrong with them letting us custies know that they use their brains to make sales, and not just their bodies? They deserve recognition for this.

    I like being "hustled" or "seduced" in the SC (as long as the dancer can gracefully accept "no, thank you").

    I don't resent it one bit... Go ahead and use your very best psychological tricks on me.
    Last edited by jack0177057; 09-29-2010 at 10:41 AM.
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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    I am very impressed with the sales techniques revealed in this thread!



    Human psychology is very interesting to me, and how it is applied in the SC is fascinating. There have been a few dancers with whom I have felt stronger attraction than others. Now, I can detect their "tricks" and say - "I know what you're doing - Damn, you're good!"

    I like being "hustled" or "seduced" in the SC (as long as the dancer can gracefully accept "no, thank you").

    I don't resent it one bit... Go ahead and use your very best psychological tricks on me.
    I already knew that's what you wanted. To be that douchebag that goes "I know your hustle, I have some dancer friends and I know all about it!"

    And you obviously DON'T like being "hustled" or "seduced" (which are two completely different things!) or else you wouldn't be saying "no, thank you" right? You would be saying "wow I really like your hustle, it's so hot when a woman knows her game, I'll gladly take a dance from someone with your sales skills!" no?

    Men like to believe there's some trick we're using, like it's not completely their choice. That they were tricked into spending all that money. Yes, thinking you might get your nut off at some point is real complicated to figure out

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    ^ Laurcon, you just like to pick fights with me for some odd reason...

    If I said something in another post that offended you... I'm sorry... I apologize for whatever caused you to become so hostile towards me.

    Now, move on... Get over it... I'm not biting...

    .... Okay, I'll bite a little... I can't resist... Your comment - "thinking you might get your nut off at some point is real complicated to figure out " - is too simplistic and shows you are not as savy as the other dancers on this thread.

    I'm in Houston, I can get my "nut off" in nearly any SC for a reasonable price (not every dancer, but at least a few, in nearly every club). I choose not to buy happy ending extras because I am in a LTR and that goes past the line for me. So, if this is your strategy (i.e., to pretend to be an happy-ending extras girl), it would not work for me and might turn me off if you insisted on on getting my "nut off", after I said "no, thank you" five times.

    On, the other hand, the other strategies discussed here, like mirroring, modeling behavior, "nonchalant" physical contact during small talk, taking certain steps to develop attraction and admiration, etc. - these are brilliant! I admire women that apply human psychology (more than just promising a BJ) in their sales technique.
    Last edited by jack0177057; 09-29-2010 at 02:50 PM.
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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    It's nothing personal Jack, I just happen to have problems with many comments you post.

    And you totally got me. I'm not savvy at all and that's my technique... pretending to be an extras girl. Keep living in your fantasy land where I don't kick ass.

    "at some point" does not mean that night!

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    Default Re: How Much Psychology Do You Use in Your Hustle?

    I think it's fascinating to watch a dancer I don't know approach me with that look on her face that says "hmmmmm.....how do I hustle HER?" Most start off shy and unsure of what to do or what to say. But after we chat a bit and they realize that I respond to what most PL's respond to, they relax and just do their normal hustle (or at least that's how I interpret it), consisting of alot of touching and sexy talk,which is always fun for me and usually very prosperous for them. I'm definitely not complainin'.

    But I don't want to give this factor too much thought because I want to suspend reality when I enter a club, and psycho-analyzing what a dancer may or may not do would ruin the fantasy for me.

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