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Thread: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

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    Default Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    We have all seen it, from customers, dancers, and male staff alike.

    It seems to me that delusional thinking is very common in this business. But then again the business is based on providing a fantasy (or maybe reality in the extras clubs lol--but even then there are deceptions and delusions going on), so that might not be such a surprise.

    Of course the delusions will vary widely, depending on the deluded ones' positions in the stripclubs. Often the delusions are completely opposite, but that doesn't stop either deluded party from scoffing at the slightest hint that they could be mistaken.

    What is really interesting is the tenacity with which certain delusions are held, in spite of any and all evidence to the contrary.


    Customer delusions:

    Strippers are all horny, all the time, especially at work.

    Stripclubs are a great place for me to meet women to date, and that is why most of the dancers are there.

    Binky blew me for 20$ a song, so should you.

    Strippers are all raking in huge piles of money every night, without expending any effort at all.


    Stripper delusions:

    Every customer should tip every girl onstage, no matter how bad she looks or how little she is trying.

    Since so many customers are asskissers, men are inferior and should all kiss my ass.

    Any man who has the slightest problem with grinding on dick lapdances is an insecure, possessive asshole, and should be immediately dumped.

    Because a lot of guys in the club are trying to fuck me, all men everywhere really want to fuck me.


    Male staff delusions:

    Because I have been unprofessional and slept with a lot of the dancers, I am a real stud (some of these guys are butt ugly too!).

    Because a lot of dancers are unreliable, they should all be treated like circus animals, and kept firmly in line at all times with draconian rules.

    So what if I got drunk and played video games all night, and spent most of my time trying to fuck them, I still deserve to be tipped royally by every girl whether they made money or not.

    I am the one really running this club, no one else knows what they are doing at all (I have seen this from bouncers, DJs, and [even grossly incompetent] managers alike).


    Of course, the alcohol does not help, nor the incessant back and forth flattery which is all part of the game running in the clubs.

    When I first started, the delusional customers were the most obvious. After a while I started noticing a lot of the dancers also suffered from the same problem, though of course the manifestation is a lot different! About the same time, I started noticing the guys working the clubs having the same problems.


    Some of the delusions are not as indefensible as others. For instance, the advertising the clubs employ, and the hustle a lot of the girls use, would tend to encourage the horny dancers myth. It's hard to blame a girl for getting a bit of a swelled head when she gets her ass kissed all night long by hundreds of men, every night she works. And so many dancers will take advantage of the slightest laxity in rules, a lot of clubs have no choice but to run a strict club. And so forth. I think people are prone to self-delusion, to some extent.

    It really is a strange environment at times.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    You hit the nail on the head on a lot of these. Good post!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    Stripper delusions:
    Every customer should tip every girl onstage, no matter how bad she looks or how little she is trying.
    Some girls throw such fits when they don't get tipped. I agree, it sucks to be up there trying and not get tipped, but sometimes that's just how it goes. We all get pissy over it at times, but some are just ridiculous, throwing tantrums and slamming their heels onto the stage. I've been out with some of these girls to strip clubs and they don't tip dancers. WTF?!?! Talk about ridiculous!
    Also, girls who bitch about treatment they receive from people then go out and treat waitstaff like crap.. it just doesnt make sense..

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    I am the one really running this club, no one else knows what they are doing at all (I have seen this from bouncers, DJs, and [even grossly incompetent] managers alike).
    And dancers. They really think the whole place would fall apart without them there...

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    It really is a strange environment at times.
    Indeed.
    Last edited by Christyismyalias; 11-10-2010 at 01:28 AM.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    This reminds me a lot of the other thread which ArmySGT started, that I've been told got locked down.

    I agree that there are a lot of delusions, but it's not like every person has one from their "category". Plus, I think the ones who are becoming the most annoying aren't even listed on here:

    Customer: "I know this is all a fantasy. I'm not going to get a dance... because I know you aren't really attracted to me".

    Every time I hear that I think:
    Ugh, it really doesn't matter if I am or not because I can give you a great dance either way!

    Plus, it's not like I'm never attracted to customers, & ironically these are often the guys who pull that line out.

    Some people walk out of the woods & still want to be a bump on a log.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    ^^Good point. I hate when they say that stuff. Sometimes I am actually enjoying myself and then they piss me off with that shit. Then I get annoyed and don't want to give them a good dance b/c they are going to think Im full of it anyway.

    Same with my info. Name, where Im from, what I do outside of work, school, and so forth. Why even talk about it b/c they think im lying anyway. Grrrr.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    Customer: "I know this is all a fantasy. I'm not going to get a dance... because I know you aren't really attracted to me".
    when i read his post, i thought of that too.

    but those guys aren't usually delusional. they're usually assholes trying to hustle us into wasting our time proving ourselves to them so they can ruin our night somehow.

    to me, the worst delusion is the one that exists so strongly outside the club too, the madonna/whore one. but at least we can play that one to our advantage.

    and let's not forget the dancer delusion "i didn't make money tonight, therefore i must be a hideous troll". i know that's my delusion of choice. good nights are luck, bad nights are because i'm fugly. i'm mostly over it now, but it totally got me for a long time.

    delusions can go both ways.
    -love everyone but keep them far from your soul-

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    Veteran Member Kat w's Avatar
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Haha this thread reminds me of a pretty funny YouTube video ...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75_gs...e_gdata_player

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Christyismyalias View Post
    but some are just ridiculous, throwing tantrums and slamming their heels onto the stage.
    Oh god I have seen some really nasty ones getting all irate up there. They will even yell at the customers and/or the DJ in extreme cases. I try to cut the songs if it gets too bad, they aren't doing themselves or the club any favors.

    Quote Originally Posted by she sells sanctuary View Post
    and let's not forget the dancer delusion "i didn't make money tonight, therefore i must be a hideous troll". i know that's my delusion of choice. good nights are luck, bad nights are because i'm fugly. i'm mostly over it now, but it totally got me for a long time.

    delusions can go both ways.
    Absolutely. I have known many extremely attractive women who let their self-esteem be dictated by how the night went, whether guys tipped them a lot, etc. On the one had it is totally understandable, if you go on a stage, you want people to notice and appreciate you--when they don't it's a letdown. But I have seen extreme cases of this, beautiful women rejected by geeks (especially in that one hellhole in Daytona) and really letting it get to them. It can be positively surreal.

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    I agree that there are a lot of delusions, but it's not like every person has one from their "category". Plus, I think the ones who are becoming the most annoying aren't even listed on here:

    Customer: "I know this is all a fantasy. I'm not going to get a dance... because I know you aren't really attracted to me".
    Yeah the 'logic' in stripclubs can take some weird, very illogical turns.

    By all means, list more that annoy you, I never meant for the OP to be a comprehensive list.

    To clarify, I am most definitely not saying everyone in the business is delusional. More that delusional thinking is very common in the business, and can cause problems during and after work.

    Sometimes it's funny as hell, actually--so long as you are in a good mood and no one is directly fucking with you.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Don't forget this customer delusion:

    She gave me her number (or got my number). She's interested, I have a chance with her. Yay !

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kat w View Post
    Haha this thread reminds me of a pretty funny YouTube video ...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75_gs...e_gdata_player
    OMFG, I have dealt with that shit before! Some of it almost word for word. They need to make one where the DJ is whacked in the head, too--I have known a few of those.


    Another customer delusion, in which I have myself shared going out on nights off in years long past--before I realized how absurd it was--is that buying a dancer a drink is a ripoff if she doesn't order alcohol. It has to be a 'real' drink, or the customer is somehow being robbed.

    Like what fucking difference does it make if you buy her a water, instead of the long island iced tea that will knock her on her ass?? It's a lot better for her to get the water. I no longer care and will tell them to get a water if they want.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    I have to say I agree with the posts. I think Djoser hit the nail on the head and that everyone develops a delusion working at the clubs. I would have to say probably my biggest delusion is that because guys (not all certainly) rejected me at the club I am ugly because I am brunette. Sounds strange, but for the longest time guys in the clubs would reject me for being a brunette. I even got rejected from clubs for this. Because of this for the longest time I was convinced brunettes are ugly, even though I had many regulars and lots of guys wanting to date me.

    My attitude about tipping was a guy was only obligated to tip if he was sitting at the stage. Otherwise no. The one about the male employees expecting the dancers to sleep with them brings back a lot of unpleasant memories. I generally avoided guys I worked with whether I liked them or not. The two times I dated someone in the club it turned into a bad thing (though I broke it off with the bouncer as friends).

    I think probably the best way to deal with the delusions (at least in my case) is to leave the club at the club. When I walked in I was dancer me, and when I walked out I was normal person me. I generally didn't hang out with anyone I worked with (went to breakfast one time with other employees and dancers though). I didn't become buddy buddy with most customers outside the club (Flakey notable exception).

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kat w View Post
    Haha this thread reminds me of a pretty funny YouTube video ...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75_gs...e_gdata_player
    That was awesome! Especially the last bit about the magazine.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    I don't think everyone develops a delusion, but rather that we are susceptible to delusional thinking--it's something to keep an eye on for sure. Everyone has to watch it, not just customers, or dancers, and male staff can be just as bad.

    Another delusion, common to DJs--that a majority of people in the club are really listening to what they are saying. Especially the cheesy guys, everyone tunes them out. But the cheesier they are, the more they think everyone is rapt to every word--it's fucking ridiculous.

    I figure if a few of the guys respond to the suggestions that they tip, get dances, get a CR, I am doing well. Hell I tune out my best friends who are DJs when I see them in their clubs.
    Last edited by Djoser; 11-10-2010 at 12:11 PM.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    I think a lot of strip club DJ's are under the delusion that:

    - They have to use the same monotone voice that is hard to understand that pretty much every other strip club DJ uses.
    A lot of them need to learn how to enunciate!

    - Their only job is to play the music
    Granted it's pointless if no one understands them but sometimes people need to be reminded to tip or told to get off the stage.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Haha, I love this thread.

    The customer misconceptions about stripper money, often apply to the dancers as well. They assumed when they started that the money would be fast and easy and when it isn't they feel 'cheated' somehow.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Customers are also often delusional in thinking that house dancers get an hourly wage! They often feel they can just come in, watch for free without buying dances or tipping on stage, because they think the clubs are paying us.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    Customers are also often delusional in thinking that house dancers get an hourly wage! They often feel they can just come in, watch for free without buying dances or tipping on stage, because they think the clubs are paying us.
    Thats def true. Also, sadly many dont care if we make money or not these days. They feel they r owed something simply by walking through the door of the club. And that they r owed it for free. Talk about a delusion...

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    Stripper delusions:

    Because a lot of guys in the club are trying to fuck me, all men everywhere really want to fuck me.
    But nearly all men everywhere are trying to fuck me. This has been true since long before I was a stripper.
    Quote Originally Posted by camille27 View Post
    i am losing my fucking mind and i really just want this chloroform dream because i think that would just get me right with jesus.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    And a popular dancer delusion:

    I'm still just as hot as I was 10 years ago. It's only because of the economy / the new, nasty girls / stupid club mismanagement / pick one / that I don't bank anymore.

    Self delusion is a common part of human nature. When you get to pick a sexy nickname for yourself and your co-workers not only call you by it, they announce you as " that sexy dreamgirl ", it could go to your head.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    We have all seen it, from customers, dancers, and male staff alike.

    It seems to me that delusional thinking is very common in this business. But then again the business is based on providing a fantasy (or maybe reality in the extras clubs lol--but even then there are deceptions and delusions going on), so that might not be such a surprise.

    Of course the delusions will vary widely, depending on the deluded ones' positions in the stripclubs. Often the delusions are completely opposite, but that doesn't stop either deluded party from scoffing at the slightest hint that they could be mistaken.

    What is really interesting is the tenacity with which certain delusions are held, in spite of any and all evidence to the contrary.

    I like the way you Troll....... its dirty, sexy, and insidious. Do it again!

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    ^ lol, that is amusing. Oddly I can imagine you saying that in person.
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    Customers are also often delusional in thinking that house dancers get an hourly wage! They often feel they can just come in, watch for free without buying dances or tipping on stage, because they think the clubs are paying us.
    Haha! I confess, when I was a puppy right out of college (and there weren't any stripclubs where I went), I thought the dancers must get paid, otherwise why would they do it?? Then I actually talked to one about how tipping works and that's how they made their money, and was shocked!
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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    ^ lol, that is amusing. Oddly I can imagine you saying that in person.
    Now Imagine I am saying it in person, while doing my best Doctor Frankenfurter voice.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    This thread tickles me.

    Lemme see.
    -When custies decide you look lonely up there on stage, so they hop up there and start dancing with you. Then they can't understand what the problem is when he's escorted off by security.

    -If a club has a tanning bed, it's not actually a bed. I remember one new girl who got drunk, regularly passed out in the tanning bed, and accidentally got locked up in the club overnight twice. (I should add that she called 911 to come get her out, then couldn't understand why she got fired).
    Last edited by Christany; 11-11-2010 at 11:20 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by markx View Post
    I'd have to have a "4 simease twin strippers gave me head and then lite themselves on fire" story to blow anybody's mind here.

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    Another one: that many customers think the dancer is looking to be a trophy wife. I recently ran into an old friend (who knew I was a stripper). He asked me where my husband was. I asked him what husband and he said "all strippers end up with an old husband with money".

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    Default Re: Delusional behavior in and out of the clubs

    ^^^ Haha - that's amusing! Well, at least Anna Nicole did...
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