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Thread: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

  1. #1
    Member Alexxxa's Avatar
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    Default Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    So I have been living with my dad for about a year and a half now, since my ex and I split. I have a 2 1/2 year old and I have been working at my job for almost a year now, full time. I have been thinking about dancing for months now and I have been slowly building up my wardrobe and platforms so that I can start in January. I have been working out like crazy trying to tone up more just to build a lil more confidence.

    My dad has been on disibility for a year now, he has osteoarthritis in his hip and can't even walk down the street without being in severe pain the following day,stuck on the couch. Last night he got his last disibility check and it said that it's been exhausted. So it looks like I'm going to be auditioning sooner than I expected. This is so stressful, I make about $12 an hr at my day job and if I work a full 40 hour week, my check is around $900 every two weeks. That is barely enough to pay a $1300 rent, plus gas, groceries and all of my bills that add up to around $300 a month. Luckly he has a couple grand in savings, but that will go fast.

    I guess I'm just looking for some words of encouragement and a place to vent, I don't have anyone else to talk to about this situation besides my boyfried. He completely understands the situation and said that he will help as much as possible. I'm super stressed and worried that I just wont be able to get the nerve to actually go through with dancing. I really want to do it, but now that this is all becoming a reality quickly I'm kinda freaking out. There is a lot of pressure on me to provide for my family, or we can go homeless.

    My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and I don't know if it's too early to ask him to move in with me. I don't want it to be a burden, like I need him to help. I don't want to rush things between us, this is the first time he has dated someone with a kid, and it's a learning experience for all of us. He also is in school, and works full time, I don't want to stress him out with his studying.

    Any words of advice?

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    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    I'm sorry that things are so tough for you right now. Definitely get in to the club ASAP and start making some serious cash, girl. Don't worry about not having enough outfits or shoes or practice. It's honestly best if you just jump right in to the business, ideally with a pair of proper shoes. You can amass a wardrobe (I actually tend to wear the same few outfits since they work well for me) over time as you learn what works best for you.

    As for your boyfriend situation, would you be asking him to move in if you weren't having financial troubles? If the answer is no, then you probably shouldn't ask him to move in with you now. Is there any way you can get a different roommate to help with the rent? Is there a basement or spare bedroom you can rent out for a couple hundred a month to ease the burden?

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    Member Alexxxa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    Okay, so I have a black pair of Pleaser platforms that are super comfy, and Im just waiting on a few outfits to come in the mail that I bought offline. So as soon as I get those I guess Im going for it!

    My boyfriend and I have talked about moving in together, but right now he is living with roomates next to the school he is attending. We live in different cities about 30 minutes away from eachother. We talked about it before this situation came up. He also got excepted into another school which is 3 hours away. So its too soon to say if he can commit to it, because he might have to move if he picks this other school. Unfortunatley there is no other rooms to rent out. Its a pretty small condo, and my dad has the other room. I share a room with my daughter.

    Thanks

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    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    I'd stay away from having your BF move in. If things don't work out getting a guy to leave can be a pain in the butt.

    Pretty much everyone is nervous when they first start. Don't worry about it, just know that what you are feeling is exactly how most of us started out... & plenty of us turned out very successful in this industry, & we all started out making mistakes. You just have to pick yourself up & keep going!
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    If your dad is off disability, does that mean he has been cleared to go back to work? Having to support him, in addition to your child and yourself seems unfair and overwhelming.

    Can you find a smaller apartment for just you and your child for a lower rent?
    Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
    - Oscar Wilde

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    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    If people can't work I think they get social security checks? Anyway, I know this is hard to hear, but you shouldn't have to support your father. You and your daughter deserve to have a wonderful life together.
    Is your boyfriend going to watching your daughter while you dance?

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    Member Alexxxa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Stressed - Need words of encouragment.

    My dad is very limited to what he can do for work. His hip gives him a lot of pain, so it's hard to think of anything that he can do sitting. He was a mechanic for over 30 years, and doesnt have any computer experience, so he can't really get a desk job.

    I understand that my daughter and I should be able to live alone, but I feel bad bailing on him since he has put a roof over my head for the past year. I've been so tight with money that I haven't saved much, at least not enought to put a deposit down and pay the 1st month's rent. I don't even have the money to pay to move (uhaul and gas)

    My dad and my boyfriend would watch my daughter while I'm working at night. My boyfriend would know what I'm doing, but I would have to lie to my family about what I'm doing. I previousley had a night job a few months back, but the pay was awful so I stopped going. So I could just say I'm doing that again. The hours are very similar.

    My dad did apply for Social Security, but we haven't heard anything yet, and he just got the application for unemployment, so hopefully one of the two will work.

    I've been checking out apartments, the prices are about the same or more. But I just need the money to move first. I just have to start dancing and see where it goes from there I guess.

    Thanks for all the input!

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