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Thread: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

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    Default addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    i don't know if it's a sexual addiction or what, don't get me wrong strip clubs are fun in moderation.. but i've gone over the edge spending thousands of dollars that i cannot afford, obviously they're doing their job great to an extent.. basically the fact that im giving them all my money but what can i do to help myself? I try to not go and spend money but when im there Money is not an object its like life outside the club doesn't matter.. only thing that matters is the continued escape from reality.., i love to get many drinks for me and the girls, dances and to tip big.. is it about the money, the women, the alcohol? i dont know.. i guess i just have no one in my life to give advice... looking for some help for anyone who has been in a similar sitution with no self-control..

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Go to the club, spend your money and get the best mileage you can and have a good time until you are broke and have to go home. It's pay for play. Quit whining.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Lose the macho attitude bro, im talking about having a serious problem..you're telling me to go completely broke.. wtf?

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Have yourself banned from every stripclub in a 200 mile radius. Just like people with gambling addictions do to themselves at casinos..

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Is it possible to leave your credit cards at home and only bring enough money for a few dances and a few drinks? Then leave after you spent your limit.

    Each time bring a little less and a little less until you can't even have a good time in the club anymore.

    It seems like it's usually easier to wean off an addiction then to just completely stop.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    -----
    Last edited by Athenathefabulous; 02-25-2011 at 05:09 AM.
    The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
    customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
    me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
    customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.


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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by NeedsHelp123 View Post
    i dont know.. i guess i just have no one in my life to give advice... looking for some help for anyone who has been in a similar sitution with no self-control..
    Brother you came to the wrong place. These boards are generally filled with either (1) girls that would very much like to see you visit them if you have this problem; or (2) guys who very much enjoy the clubs and similarly spend a lot of money in them.

    But in the spirit of giving, here are a few pieces of advice:

    1. Man the fuck up. If you don't have the money don't go. Find a hobby or rent some cheap porn;

    2. If you don't have a girlfriend, jerk off a lot. And if you do, bang her and jerk off some more. Seriously dude, this is the poor man's way of satisfying his needs without losing his head or going broke. It is amazing what blowing one's load will do to clear the fuzz off of the brain; or

    3. If 1 and 2 don't work and you absoluely need to go to a club, leave your ATM and credit cards at home.

    You remind me of someone who visits one of my local clubs to see my fav. She calls him "Home Depot guy" because that is where he works and, accordingly, he doesn't make much money. He blows all of his discretionary cash on her and has maxed out his cards buying funny money to pay her. I've seen the poor slob leave the club, come back just to hand her $100, then leave again. Truly pathetic.

    Man up dude. Not everyone can afford to go to the clubs, and those that cannot need to find another outlet.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    _Avery_'s idea is a pretty good one if it's feasible.

    A few times, I have had customers ask their trusted friends to hold their cash and cards for them. They have an allowance, and once its spent, their friends won't let them buy anymore. It is a little sad to see a grown man asking how much more he is allowed to spend...but at least he doesn't wake up the next day and want to kill himself after he realizes he spent every penny he has. Also, this way, at least his card is accessible if there is an emergency.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by NeedsHelp123 View Post
    i don't know if it's a sexual addiction or what, don't get me wrong strip clubs are fun in moderation.. but i've gone over the edge spending thousands of dollars that i cannot afford, obviously they're doing their job great to an extent.. basically the fact that im giving them all my money but what can i do to help myself? I try to not go and spend money but when im there Money is not an object its like life outside the club doesn't matter.. only thing that matters is the continued escape from reality.., i love to get many drinks for me and the girls, dances and to tip big.. is it about the money, the women, the alcohol? i dont know.. i guess i just have no one in my life to give advice... looking for some help for anyone who has been in a similar sitution with no self-control..
    I went overboard when I first started visiting clubs and hanging out in the CR. I have a good bit of discretionary funds every month but still occasionally go over mainly because I have crazy amounts of fun, and I can always dip into savings or next months earnings. I like to think I'm getting all of this out of my system while I'm young.

    The idea of your friend holding your cash and cards is also a great alternative. Theres actually plenty of rap songs that mention them hitting up stripclubs and having a friend hold their cash/cards so I wouldn't feel too bad doing that if you had to.

    If you are serious and actually think you have a problem, you should probably find a sex therapist locally to figure out your triggers and whatnot. You'd know if you were a sex addict tho, it'd be more than just strip clubs & have started a long time ago when you were younger I'd think.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    ------
    Last edited by Athenathefabulous; 02-25-2011 at 05:09 AM.
    The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
    customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
    me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
    customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.


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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    harsh? yes. but like i said, im a jaded bitch. And you are a pervert in a strip club. Its not our fault you have issues.
    Pervert?

    He likes grown women, not little children or animals. While I would agree with the term pathetic, I'm not sure I saw enough in his posts to label him a pervert.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    You need to see someone professionally - a therapist, counselor, group counseling, anything. It sounds like you need some extra help in facing the situation you're in (and I adore this board but I doubt SW would be the most helpful place).

    FWIW ~ Good for you for saying something about it - now get out there and get help before it gets any worse. Seriously. I have known gambling addicts who have lost their homes and a sex addict who lost his job and family. It doesn't have to get that bad! Good luck!

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    Pervert?

    He likes grown women, not little children or animals. While I would agree with the term pathetic, I'm not sure I saw enough in his posts to label him a pervert.
    we are all perverts in the SC in my opinion. Hes a pervert, you're a pervert, I'm a pervert. I wasnt implying that he was a pedophile or into bestiality. you dont need to be that extreme to fall into the category of a pervert in a SC.
    The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
    customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
    me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
    customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.


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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by NeedsHelp123 View Post
    i don't know if it's a sexual addiction or what, don't get me wrong strip clubs are fun in moderation.. but i've gone over the edge spending thousands of dollars that i cannot afford, obviously they're doing their job great to an extent.. basically the fact that im giving them all my money but what can i do to help myself? I try to not go and spend money but when im there Money is not an object its like life outside the club doesn't matter.. only thing that matters is the continued escape from reality.., i love to get many drinks for me and the girls, dances and to tip big.. is it about the money, the women, the alcohol? i dont know.. i guess i just have no one in my life to give advice... looking for some help for anyone who has been in a similar sitution with no self-control..


    Although I also spend waaaaaaaay too much moolah in stripclubs, I am very good at budgeting and never spend more than I intend. But that's neither here nor there.

    What helped me snap back to reality when I first started clubbing and was REALLY hitting the bank account hard, was I stopped hanging out in topless alcohol serving joints and headed to the "dry" nude clubs here in L.A. Once I took booze out of the equation, the impulse spending & multiple ATM trips dropped down significantly. I know alot of people like to get their drink on in clubs, so that might not work for them. It worked big time for me. I still occasionally visit topless clubs, but I only buy drinks for the girls, not myself.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by NeedsHelp123 View Post
    i guess i just have no one in my life to give advice... looking for some help for anyone who has been in a similar sitution with no self-control..
    Advice? How but don't go if you can't afford it. Seriously dude, it's all about self control whether it's strip clubs, drinking, gambling or whatever else your vice is. If your addiction is buying the temporary affection of naked women then that is what need to learn how to deal with.
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    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by Athenathefabulous View Post
    come visit me in new orleans. i will totally help you out with your addiction .

    Haha!!

    When I read the title to this thread I was wondering how long it would take for someone to respond like this. I have to say it is somewhat shocking to me that it was over an hour before this came out.

    As to the OP, so what you're saying is you can't stop yourself from GOING to the club then spending, or are you saying you just can't stop spending when you get to the club?

    If its the first reason, then you need to find a different hobby (notice I didn't say better hobby, cause, well do I really have to say it? ) If its the second one, well then avoid the club altogether.

    I do realize that my advice is easier said than done, especially if an addiction is involved. But the truth is, if you break it down to its simplest form, that ends up being your goal.
    I'm almost perfect, some of the time

    Success is getting what you want, happiness is wanting what you get.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    You wouldn't go to the Malboro website to ask for help in quitting smoking would you?

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    ^ Actually, Philip Morris is required by law to provide that information.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Set a budget. Bring limited cash only based on your budget. Once you run out, go home.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Go to a 12-step group for sex addicts, seek counseling, talk to a friend, family member or member of the clergy. Get outside help for sure if you want to overcome this or any addiction

    This is a quiz to help you assess your behavior:
    http://www.sexhelp.com/sast.cfm

    And this is a link to Sex Addicts Anonymous.

    http://www.sexaa.org/

    I strongly suggest that you seek outside help. Good luck.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Here's a thought, go to a dive that will hire anyone and get a job working there (bartending, managing, djing, bussing, washing dishes) Maybe you just like the environment and want to be around it. That way you could still be in the environment and make a little cash at night instead of spending it. As a dancer, I love the dressing room, the girls, everything about a club, once I learned how to ignore/rise above the obligatory creeps.

    Also, when my hubby and I go to clubs for fun, we just take a stack of $1 and sit by the stage. We only tip the stage girls. (Well ok, sometimes there's a girl that just has to dance for us That's an easy way to nurse $40 for a couple hours. As a dancer I know the girls can appreciate the stage tippers, they're still paying for a peek.

    I hope some of those ideas help
    Yes, I'm real.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    wow what horrible advice people are giving you!! Ok my advice as a dancer is to just stop going. I see guys like this and it makes me sad. In fact theres one guy who comes into my club that has a serious addiction and I ignore him and dont like the way other girls treat him and hound him for dances. I havent lost my morals in this game and theres plenty of other people to make $$ from.

    Ask yourself why do I keep going to the clubs, what is it really giving me that I cant get in real life? Also consider talking to someone, maybe a psychologist or close friend who can help you, we all go through difficult times I wish you the best of luck sweetie

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by jasmine22 View Post
    wow what horrible advice people are giving you!!)

    Well that was rude.
    We're not experts, and I highly doubt you are.

    We're just throwing ideas out like you are.

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Quote Originally Posted by jasmine22 View Post
    wow what horrible advice people are giving you!!

    ummm...dude came to a site called stripperweb
    what do you expect?

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    Default Re: addicted to strip clubs..becoming a problem

    Decide how much money is reasonable for you to spend and start bringing that much. If you still enjoy yourself spending less than too much, you'll be better equipped to exhibit some self-control when you have more cash on you. Unless you can control yourself in the midst of a visit, you're asking for trouble, and the world is full of guys like this.
    "never trust a big butt and a smile"-- Bell Biv DeVoe

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