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Thread: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

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    Default Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    I have been with my boyfriend for 7 months, we've had our ups and downs, and i have found out today that he has been cheating on me, weekly, with different girls the wholetime.

    I went away for the weekend and when i came back he wasnt back from work...he ame home an hour later...it was fine but i was so paranoid i went thru his phone to find, in a nutshell he's been texting ringing, pic msging girls the whole weekend. He shagged one on sun morning and got sucked off by another sun evening while i was travelling back to him.

    I asked him and he confessed all...

    I am so hurt, i know ive been stupid cause i knew something was going on but i loved him so much i let it go, i thought i was going crazy, i wasnt, it was all true.

    I gave up dancing, my family, my friends, my job, my whole life to be with him, and he has thrown it back in my face, ive moved out and am at home but im really really hurting, i cant believe how humiliated and embaressed i feel, and even more fucking stupid, id go back to him in a heartbeat...

    just needed to get it off my chest and hopefully get some msgs of love from you girls, i know weve all been there, help me stay strong cause im flailing a bit at the moment, cant eat, cant sleep, just want to fade away to be honest..

    sorry for being so miserable im just so hearbroken its killing me..


    xxx
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    OMG... Im so sorry this happened to you. What a jerk! *hugs*

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    Featured Member GlitterBexie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    thank u hunny is it sad that i read ur post and ive just tear-ed up like a saddo! I knew u guys would make me feel better! Least i can go back dancing now, im so glad i can come on here again, and buy 7 inch shoes! First thing i did when i get home was have a cigarette and get onto the clubs in my area!
    ''I love fake boobs''
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    That's rough, girl, I'm so sorry. It's good that you have a place to go so you can get away with him and rebuild your life with a support system. I know it's not much of a consolation, but at least you found out about his cheating ways fairly early into the relationship, and you hadn't invested years in to it, or got married or anything.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    **HUGS

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    Featured Member GlitterBexie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    this is what i just keep thinking, stay strong. i kno he loves me deep down and he has a good heart but if he cant stay faithful then i just end up driving myself insane!

    I had no life there, i wasnt allowed out, ever, and i did everything for him, now i think about it, it was cause of all the girls he was kissing, shaging etc were out and he didnt want me there to see it!

    Im gonna get myself sorted and go bk in a few months looking amazing and show him just what hes missing lol, sad but i want him to realise what hes lost, which he wont until he mises me, which i know he will. (sounds like im convincing myself more than anything lol)

    U girls are amazing and making me feel so much better already! I cannot begin to thank y'all enough! I suffer with depression (borderline bipolar) so keeping positive is a must! I have a few valium if i cant sleep but im keeping it under control, i know that drinking is not a good idea for me right now and i just need to focus on me and gettting my head back together.

    xxx
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Awwwww.
    You're right, we've all been there. Or, at least I have. I was so heartbroken that I was sitting in classes at uni fighting back tears, bawling all night long at home, not sleeping, fighting the urge to call him and tell him how much I love him and how I'd do anything for him...the whole drill.
    Thing with love is: stakes are high. You can't love honestly if you don't give away your heart, and sometimes it just happens that the person we gave ourselves to was unworthy and crushed us into million pieces. I don't think I ever felt worse pain than that.
    But, in the end, love is worth it, and if we don't put ourself out there and take that risk we would never be able to find it. So, I say, be proud of yourself because you loved and believed the person you love, because, honestly, some people don't know how to do that.

    Do what annabanana said, find a routine and hang out with people a lot, it will keep you occupied and sane, and less inclined to budge in front of that overwhelming instinct to go back to him. It will be slow and painful, but you will recover.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Oh honey...I'm so sorry this happened...I was all watery eyed reading this too.

    I have to say, there's NO WAY that this guy loves you if he's treating you in this despicable manner. Cad...Bounder...Flake...Sad Act are all totally inadequate words to describe what a complete slimeball he is...but hey.....it's NOT your fault!

    It's time to concentrate on you now. You're not stupid and you're certainly not gonna be left on the heap. Take your time to get over this, meet with REAL friends, keep yourself occupied, keep fit and strong and you will get over it. I had this happen when I was 22 and all I wanted to do was hide in my room under the covers and never come out. I did of course....and after a while it all seemed a little silly......

    There's a good guy out there for you - I'm a big believer in that. Love is a crazy game sometimes..and you have to take people on trust otherwise we'd all be sitting indoors knitting scarves!

    Keep your chin up girl...*HUGS*
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Sorry this happened. I don't know what else to say except many men are jerks this way.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    I have been with my boyfriend for 7 months, we've had our ups and downs, and i have found out today that he has been cheating on me, weekly, with different girls the wholetime.
    I'm so sorry you are going through this honey and i know this is probably the last thing you want to think about right now but if this is anywhere close to being true you need to take yourself to a clinic and get tested ASAP.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    I gave up dancing, my family, my friends, my job, my whole life to be with him, and he has thrown it back in my face, ive moved out and am at home but im really really hurting, i cant believe how humiliated and embaressed i feel, and even more fucking stupid, id go back to him in a heartbeat...
    Ugh! I know sometimes I can come across rather cross & un-romantic on this forum... but this is an exact example of why I always say:

    "Your career will never talk back to you, it will never lie, steal, cheat on you... & most importantly it will never leave you."

    People do those things, not your career - which is why I really believe in never giving up what I want for myself in order for someone else to be happy... particularly my career. I've been there, done that.



    I'm sorry to hear this happened to you. Just know that many others have been in the same boat... you are not alone. Keep your chin up!


    Quote Originally Posted by Trem View Post
    take yourself to a clinic and get tested ASAP.
    I agree with this. Generally in situations like this doctors will tell you to get tested regularly for up to a year & a half after the incident.
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by Kylea2 View Post
    Ugh! I know sometimes I can come across rather cross & un-romantic on this forum... but this is an exact example of why I always say:

    "Your career will never talk back to you, it will never lie, steal, cheat on you... & most importantly it will never leave you."

    People do those things, not your career - which is why I really believe in never giving up what I want for myself in order for someone else to be happy... particularly my career. I've been there, done that.



    I'm sorry to hear this happened to you. Just know that many others have been in the same boat... you are not alone. Keep your chin up!




    I agree with this. Generally in situations like this doctors will tell you to get tested regularly for up to a year & a half after the incident.
    Yes! Too many women give up careers (stripping or non stripping) and then things like this happen. I've seen all kinds of women give up careers to please a man and get hurt in the long run. One friend gave up a high powered career to stay at home with her baby, found out after a few years her husband was cheating, and because she hasn't worked in years, she can't find a job. I know other people with situations like this. Another friend was a stripper but gave it up because her boyfriend hated it. She's being controlled by him now. I know many examples of this. I once also briefly gave up my dancing career for a boyfriend when I moved in. I realized this was a bad idea and I went back to dancing. I would NEVER give up my career for any man ever again. I think it's a very bad idea when women do. I wouldn't even give up a career to stay at home with a baby, let alone because a man wanted me to. After all he could leave me, cheat on me, or abuse me then what?

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    Featured Member pixierocksonthepole's Avatar
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Stay strong and do whatever it is that makes you happy. Be with someone willing to be happy with who you are and what you do because it is what makes you happy. Not the other way around.





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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Write down everything he has done to you even the cheating stuff(I know it hurts) When u think about going back to him read that journal.If u dont stop the cycle its gonna happen overe and over again.

    I would also start back dancing or doing something that will boost ur selfesteem.Huggs

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    this is what i just keep thinking, stay strong. i kno he loves me deep down and he has a good heart but if he cant stay faithful then i just end up driving myself insane!

    I had no life there, i wasnt allowed out, ever, and i did everything for him, now i think about it, it was cause of all the girls he was kissing, shaging etc were out and he didnt want me there to see it!



    xxx
    Bullshit. Stop telling yourself that.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    After everything you've written here, I wouldnt be sad, I'd be LIVID. I would've kicked his ass .

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    Featured Member GlitterBexie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    icant be annoyed at him cause i blame myself, i knew it was going on and i accepted it, fuck i walked in on it once and i stayed, i just dont see how im ever going to trust anyone ever again, the only girl who has given a shit is my best friend whos a dancer, my ''best friend'' of 14 years hasnt text back,

    I have just seen pics of myself from last night and i look so fat and so ugly, probably another two reasons why i wasnt worth being faithful to. Men lie so bad, i just dont want to feel anything, im sat here wondering how long 17 valium would put me to sleep for if i took them in one go, sound like an attention seeking little bitch but i just dont want to feel anything ever ever again.

    thank u so much for your support girls

    xx
    ''I love fake boobs''
    ''They're not fake! I grew them myself!''

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    icant be annoyed at him cause i blame myself, i knew it was going on and i accepted it, fuck i walked in on it once and i stayed, i just dont see how im ever going to trust anyone ever again, the only girl who has given a shit is my best friend whos a dancer, my ''best friend'' of 14 years hasnt text back,

    I have just seen pics of myself from last night and i look so fat and so ugly, probably another two reasons why i wasnt worth being faithful to. Men lie so bad, i just dont want to feel anything, im sat here wondering how long 17 valium would put me to sleep for if i took them in one go, sound like an attention seeking little bitch but i just dont want to feel anything ever ever again.

    thank u so much for your support girls

    xx

    Honey, this is sooo totally NOT the view to take.

    HIS cheating on you is NOT your fault. It is a weakness in him...a very selfish and disgraceful weakness too. Men really never 'get it', that cheating on a partner is not macho - it's cruddy behaviour. He'll do it again and again until something or someone bites him back......which may be never.

    It won't seem like it now - but you're wwaaaay better off without him in your life. A REAL man would love you...fat and ugly or NOT fat and ugly. I'm pretty sure that you're NOT fat and ugly....you're just very down, and that's understandable.

    Take another look at the posts here - there's some good advice on how you can get your mind off this and begin to get over the whole thing.

    I for one, would love it - if say... next week - you posted again, but this time you're raging angry.....that would be far more healthy!

    Meantime....valium is not the answer. You're worth much, much more than that.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    icant be annoyed at him cause i blame myself, i knew it was going on and i accepted it, fuck i walked in on it once and i stayed
    You learned a tough lesson. Next time you see something seriously wrong, you leave the relationship.

    I had a man try to raise his hand to me ONCE. That was the day I stopped making excuses & left him. I've talked about him many times on this forum. I wasn't going to let him hit me... but the minute I knew that he could be like that I left. That was after about 5 years together.

    I've had other ex's go psycho on me - stalking, cutting the starter wire on my car, physically keeping me from getting into my car. None of that is acceptable.

    I can put up with a lot of emotional abuse, but I won't even do that... so I'm CERTAINLY not going to put up with any physical abuse or endangerment. By sleeping with other people, & then you, your ex put you in physical danger - & that is NOT acceptable. You need to make yourself a list of things that under no circumstance should you put up with from a boyfriend/S.O. ... & anything that could take your life away from you should be on that list.


    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    I have just seen pics of myself from last night and i look so fat and so ugly, probably another two reasons why i wasnt worth being faithful to.
    The camera adds 10 lbs... or in my case I think it's more like 20lbs . Anyhow, people tend to always put on weight when they are in relationships. We get comfortable, we eat meals on a more regular bases, & we often base entertainment around eating. Don't think he had the right to cheat on you because of that! Chances are he slowly changed too & you probably didn't even notice. Just take the extra time while you are single to tone up again, part of which will happen naturally.


    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    Men lie so bad, i just dont want to feel anything
    Sigh, unfortunately sweetie, it isn't just men. If it was, the world would be so much easier to operate in because we'd know who to trust & who not to trust. For months I have been questioning which of two WOMEN to trust. Both are professional acquaintances, & both are people I would consider personal friends, although one a much closer friend than the other. I hear two different stories on a single circumstance from them, which has happened multiple times. One has the ability to make money OFF of me, the other has the ability to make money WITH me. That means both potentially have a reason to lie to me, or exaggerate things. I still am not sure of the truth for things that happened with them more than two years ago... & I may never know. Hopefully over time though I will discover which of them is more honest than the other, but it could be that neither of them are trust worthy - which would be a shame because I really want to trust them both.

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    Im sat here wondering how long 17 valium would put me to sleep for if i took them in one go, sound like an attention seeking little bitch but i just dont want to feel anything ever ever again.
    PLEASE DON'T! You know how that could end. Regardless of what he did to you, I'm sure there would be people who would be devastated & heartbroken if taking those ended badly. You said your dancer friend is close to you, think about how she would feel, or anyone else who you are close to: family, co-workers, pets. Its really hard to feel like people aren't selfish who don't think of others when they cause them worry & grief.
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    im trying to hard to not feel sorry for myself. and im going so up and down. i really have got nothing to live for. literally, nothing.

    you know the sad thing, i still cant be angry at him, i want to text him and ask him if he will ever want me back cause if not then i will kill myself, but i dont want him to think im crazy in case he does want me back which he doesnt cause he never wanted me in the first place, even tho i know im crazy anyway, my fucvking life has fallen apart and there is just no point.
    ''I love fake boobs''
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    i was with my girl for 10 years and she cheated on my twice, so i know how you feel. right now all those feelings you have are normal and they will pass (i promise), but if you're really thinking about suicide then go get help ASAP. no joke.

    i dont know why people cheat, but i think its a form of insecurity. but never again should you make anyone the center of your life. a healthy relationship is about SHARING lives.
    Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today. - James Dean

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    my 2 cents

    i know its easy to read over txts, listen to songs that remind you of him and watch movies you saw together... ive done this, for over a year after it ended. due to my stupidly self-indulgent behaviour i kept myself unhappy for a long time and only when a trip to europe provided a distraction, a place where theres no every street name, shop or side of town remind me of him i could fully relax and let go. luckly i found my perfect partner a month after i got back, which i woudlntve been able to if i kept torturing myself over memories.

    troll the interwebs!

    www.postsecret.com - great for seeing the bigger picture and beauty in other peoples secrets
    www.fmylife.com - have a laugh at other peoples expense, youve earnt it

    when you go back to dancing, every night you roll around on piles of money you havnt been able to get because of him think of what a jerk he woulda been if his possessiveness separated you from a wonderful income

    =] cuddles x
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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    i think the advice that everyone is giving you is extremely important and helpful. its almost imperative to busy yourself from the pain and the painful thoughts in your head. yes, you should throw yourself into your work, creative endeavors or working out. and you are doing the right thing by expressing yourself to a community that has so many supportive people out there who can identify and give you advice. but one of the most crucial pieces of information that no one has, or rarely ever does, give you is WHY it happened in the first place. the explanation is critical for you to understand, which in turn will allow you to move on that much faster.

    from a honest male perspective, odds are whatever you do or did not do contributed to his dishonesty. most men simply continually seek validation from other women regardless of how they look, how nice they are or how much they feel loved and desired. some men are simply hard-wired to crave the approval of women. whether that is in the form of love, attention, words or blow jobs, it is nothing that you could have prevented.
    to give you an example, a friend of mine who is a very attractive and successful guy goes out every weekend to clubs and gets numbers from women. when i ask him why he does this despite having an amazing girlfriend who is a former miss poland, he tells me, "dude, i dont makeout of bang any of these chicks. i just do it to see if i can." while he is in the minority of men who usually see proof in a cum-shot, his behavior is indicative of a certain segment of males (and people, really) who continually seek attention from women regardless of how good they have it back home.
    whether this is a disease is debatable, but what isnt are the compulsions he feels. and sadly, he will leave a wake of good women behind him that he will one day refer to as, "the ones that got away."

    i know none of this will ease your heartache, but you should know that not all men out there suffer from this. not all men out there are cowards or little boys dressed as charming men. and that there are men out there who may still feel the compulsions but will fight them everyday to show you just how incredible you are to them.
    good luck in finding one, kitten.

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    Default Re: Completely hearbroken and unbelievable gutted...

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterBexie View Post
    icant be annoyed at him cause i blame myself, i knew it was going on and i accepted it, fuck i walked in on it once and i stayed, i just dont see how im ever going to trust anyone ever again, the only girl who has given a shit is my best friend whos a dancer, my ''best friend'' of 14 years hasnt text back,

    I have just seen pics of myself from last night and i look so fat and so ugly, probably another two reasons why i wasnt worth being faithful to. Men lie so bad, i just dont want to feel anything, im sat here wondering how long 17 valium would put me to sleep for if i took them in one go, sound like an attention seeking little bitch but i just dont want to feel anything ever ever again.

    thank u so much for your support girls

    xx
    That doesn't make sense. Halle Berry has been cheated on, Sienna Miller has been cheated on, Eva Longoria has been cheated on. It's not about not being attractive enough to keep him. It's about him having no loyalty, integrity, morality. He sounds like a controlling emotional abuser to me. Check this out and see if it works for you. www.baggagereclaim.com
    He sounds textbook to me.
    “What a caterpillar calls the end of the world we call a butterfly.” - ECKHART TOLLE

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