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Thread: My reality of high-end escorting

  1. #51
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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    GFE CAN be fully covered. I know wonderful ladies who get great rates and GFE reviews and do everything covered. I said I am not GFE because I don't want to open mouth kiss someone - a peck on the lips is fine, having some strangers tongue swirl around my tonsils makes me ill.
    Some escort advertising malls and review boards will not allow you to advertise yourself as GFE if you do not provide BBBJ. You don't have to like it or agree with it but it is a fact. Escorts advertising as GFE on these venues cannot be fully covered.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    Some escort advertising malls and review boards will not allow you to advertise yourself as GFE if you do not provide BBBJ. You don't have to like it or agree with it but it is a fact. Escorts advertising as GFE on these venues cannot be fully covered.
    Well I'm lucky I work in an area where BBBJ isn't needed to be GFE.

    http://www.sexwork.com/subcontents/abbreviations.html

    http://www.sexwork.com/Intimacy/GFE.html

    And TER and Redbook both have pages where they state that GFE is meaningless these days due to the confusion.

    I've also been doing this work for 14 years so I'm a fiend about condoms and I came of age when HIV was starting to be known - I had two friends in high school die of AIDS when it was a quick, painful death sentence.

    There was a brief time when I did offer BBBJ but seriously the worry, the constant fear of catching something, just wasn't worth it.

    I guess I've been lucky and found quality clients who appreciate more than the indiviual acts involved; I think a certain caliber of men even appreciate my safety measures. An experience is what WE, the illusionist, makes it. We can give BBBJ but if it's cold and mechanical, is it as good as a covered BJ from a warm, sensual woman who makes eye contact, smiles and acts like she ENJOYS it?

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    GFE CAN be fully covered. I know wonderful ladies who get great rates and GFE reviews and do everything covered. I said I am not GFE because I don't want to open mouth kiss someone - a peck on the lips is fine, having some strangers tongue swirl around my tonsils makes me ill.

    And bareback girls are really risking a lot. Even with a clear AIM test/bill of health how can they know the guy they're seeing didn't have unprotected gay sex? CL and it's casual encounters has made hooking up way too easy and convenient - I quit doing bbbj (and NEVER to completion) after a guy, in postcoital cuddle, told me about an amazing all male threeway he had the week before and how he was "worried now cuz they didn't wrap up". I will never forget the sinking feeling in my stomach.

    When a man contacts me and even ASKS for BB sex, he goes on my DO NOT SEE list. I also know of other ladies who do offer BB FS - client who has ED issues admitted to me a couple of names, another client confirmed he too was offered this - and I try not to see guys who have seen them. It's amazing what some people will do for an extra $100...because let's be real, not every BB provider is getting THOUSANDS for her risk.
    I'm very sorry but if EVERYTHING is covered it just ain't GFE. Wishes and buts are not candies and nuts.

    I don't know who these ladies are that you are referring to who get "GFE reviews" with "everything covered" but somebody somewhere is playing fast and loose with a few facts.

    Can you be "GFE" without DFK ? Hmmm. I wouldn't describe it as such and neither would any seasoned hobbyist I know. That's why they invented the terms "PARTIAL GFE" or "LIMITED GFE".

    Please don't misunderstand. Nobody has more respect for individual tastes, limits and comfort zones than I do. "No" means NO afaic and I have never disrespected any lady's speed limits or mileage limitations. Like most reputable hobbyists. Almost all in fact. I do however have a fetish for truth in advertising and proper labeling. Advertising oneself as "GFE" without making any limitation or qualification clear beforehand will do nothing but hurt an escort's reputation and affect her reviews. And it's a VERY rare escort who can shrug off poor or discounted reviews.

    As we've posted, AIM tests have recently taken a few hits and most escorts consider them to be meaningless pieces of paper. As would I, btw. Likewise, any female escort who knowing sees bisexual men without taking extra precautions is being very foolish imho. And placing a lot of other people at risk.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    Well I'm lucky I work in an area where BBBJ isn't needed to be GFE.

    http://www.sexwork.com/subcontents/abbreviations.html

    http://www.sexwork.com/Intimacy/GFE.html

    And TER and Redbook both have pages where they state that GFE is meaningless these days due to the confusion.

    I've also been doing this work for 14 years so I'm a fiend about condoms and I came of age when HIV was starting to be known - I had two friends in high school die of AIDS when it was a quick, painful death sentence.

    There was a brief time when I did offer BBBJ but seriously the worry, the constant fear of catching something, just wasn't worth it.

    I guess I've been lucky and found quality clients who appreciate more than the indiviual acts involved; I think a certain caliber of men even appreciate my safety measures. An experience is what WE, the illusionist, makes it. We can give BBBJ but if it's cold and mechanical, is it as good as a covered BJ from a warm, sensual woman who makes eye contact, smiles and acts like she ENJOYS it?
    As I've said, tastes and preferences vary among hobbyists. Many men appreciate the enhanced safety but it ain't GFE as that term is commonly used and understood. Regardless of the charm and personality of the provider.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Damn! My props to you ladies! I'm well read, intelligent (He calls me his little nerd) I listen to everything from Schubert to johnny Cash. but the one thing that would hold me back is my 20+ tattoos.
    C'est la vie.
    If escorting is something you'd like to do I vote go for it, tattoos or not. There are a handful of successful midrange escorts in my city who are loaded with body art (including scarification in 2 cases). Altgirl looks can be really popular - set a rate you're comfortable with and work it!

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    Well I'm lucky I work in an area where BBBJ isn't needed to be GFE.
    In Canada GFE includes DFK and BBBJ. CBJ is SGFE here (safe girlfriend), other places call it L(imited)GFE or P(artial)GFE.

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    There was a brief time when I did offer BBBJ but seriously the worry, the constant fear of catching something, just wasn't worth it.
    I'm sorry to hear about your friends Its really cool that you work in a framework you're comfortable with, it makes me happy that women have the right to choose their service menus.

    That been said, Imma jack the thread for a sec to toss in that the connection between HIV and oral is hugely misunderstood. The Canadian AIDS society calls oral sex both ways a "negligible risk". Like really really really superlow, much lower than your chances of HPV or HSV with a condom. Oral Sex and "Safer Sex Counselling": Existing Views and Recommendationshas a great synopsis, its about halfway down the page. Just above it that section there's the actual numbers and cases

    Sorry to jack.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by beckatron View Post
    In Canada GFE includes DFK and BBBJ. CBJ is SGFE here (safe girlfriend), other places call it L(imited)GFE or P(artial)GFE.


    I'm sorry to hear about your friends Its really cool that you work in a framework you're comfortable with, it makes me happy that women have the right to choose their service menus.

    That been said, Imma jack the thread for a sec to toss in that the connection between HIV and oral is hugely misunderstood. The Canadian AIDS society calls oral sex both ways a "negligible risk". Like really really really superlow, much lower than your chances of HPV or HSV with a condom. Oral Sex and "Safer Sex Counselling": Existing Views and Recommendationshas a great synopsis, its about halfway down the page. Just above it that section there's the actual numbers and cases

    Sorry to jack.

    <blush> yeah I know your chances are extremely low but seriously lol, I'm a hypochondriac bigtime. Lol, when I would do a bbbj I would be thinking ..." I hope I didn't scrub my teeth too hard before this" lol

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by beckatron View Post
    In Canada GFE includes DFK and BBBJ. CBJ is SGFE here (safe girlfriend), other places call it L(imited)GFE or P(artial)GFE.


    I'm sorry to hear about your friends Its really cool that you work in a framework you're comfortable with, it makes me happy that women have the right to choose their service menus.

    That been said, Imma jack the thread for a sec to toss in that the connection between HIV and oral is hugely misunderstood. The Canadian AIDS society calls oral sex both ways a "negligible risk". Like really really really superlow, much lower than your chances of HPV or HSV with a condom. Oral Sex and "Safer Sex Counselling": Existing Views and Recommendationshas a great synopsis, its about halfway down the page. Just above it that section there's the actual numbers and cases

    Sorry to jack.
    There are other things besides just AIDS to worry about. One of which is a nasty, fungal STD whose name I forget. CIM is a GREAT way to get it although rinsing immediately afterwards can radically reduce the risk. Sorry we couldn't keep this more... um... poetic.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Hopefully you all are staying covered and not offering bare anything. Low risk or not, the money is not worth a disease. Period.
    Taking a break from all unproductive shit will prove to be the best choice you can make.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    I'm lost... here's what I've learned
    GFE-girlfriend experience
    PSE- porn star experience
    BBBJ-2 extra b's blow job :p
    WTF-what the fuck?
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    People just have different opinions. When I use to do this, I got a lot of guys asking for GFE, and they wanted to cuddle and kiss, but still wanted things covered. Covered BJ.

    I used to advertise GFE and stayed covered, and got calls for...GFE. Everyone is going to come on here with x amount of opinions, and opinionated people will always claim what THEY say is the right way.

    Some will say well would you do things with your boyfriend/husband girlfriend/wife covered? That is not the point. The point is that people are fucking strangers for money, and need to cover up. I had guys who had the fantasy of a girl friend experience, but would never get with someone and not use protection.
    Taking a break from all unproductive shit will prove to be the best choice you can make.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    I'm lost... here's what I've learned
    GFE-girlfriend experience
    PSE- porn star experience
    BBBJ-2 extra b's blow job :p
    WTF-what the fuck?
    BBBJ = "Bareback blow job" = bj w/o a condom
    CIM = "Cum in mouth "
    BBBJTC= BBBJ resulting in CIM
    BBBJTCNQNS = BBBJ resulting in CIM and swallowing

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by BustyAmeera View Post
    People just have different opinions. When I use to do this, I got a lot of guys asking for GFE, and they wanted to cuddle and kiss, but still wanted things covered. Covered BJ.

    I used to advertise GFE and stayed covered, and got calls for...GFE. Everyone is going to come on here with x amount of opinions, and opinionated people will always claim what THEY say is the right way.

    Some will say well would you do things with your boyfriend/husband girlfriend/wife covered? That is not the point. The point is that people are fucking strangers for money, and need to cover up. I had guys who had the fantasy of a girl friend experience, but would never get with someone and not use protection.
    I'm sorry but this is nothing more than personal nomenclature. Today, if you advertised yourself as "GFE" and then insisted that everything be covered it would have negative ramifications. Your reviews would highlight the misrepresentation and you'd get busted on the boards.

    There is nothing wrong with being a "safety girl". Nothing whatsoever. Plenty of such escorts get plenty of business. But if you don't kiss and don't offer bbbj then it's not a good idea to use "gfe" in your advertising.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Clare View Post
    Well I'm lucky I work in an area where BBBJ isn't needed to be GFE.

    http://www.sexwork.com/subcontents/abbreviations.html

    http://www.sexwork.com/Intimacy/GFE.html

    And TER and Redbook both have pages where they state that GFE is meaningless these days due to the confusion.

    I've also been doing this work for 14 years so I'm a fiend about condoms and I came of age when HIV was starting to be known - I had two friends in high school die of AIDS when it was a quick, painful death sentence.

    There was a brief time when I did offer BBBJ but seriously the worry, the constant fear of catching something, just wasn't worth it.

    I guess I've been lucky and found quality clients who appreciate more than the indiviual acts involved; I think a certain caliber of men even appreciate my safety measures. An experience is what WE, the illusionist, makes it. We can give BBBJ but if it's cold and mechanical, is it as good as a covered BJ from a warm, sensual woman who makes eye contact, smiles and acts like she ENJOYS it?
    Clare, I am glad that you do what you are comfortable with. It sounds like you believe that you offer a more passionate experience by playing in your comfort zone. That makes sense. I would never ask a lady to do something that she is not comfortable with, and in fact, that is why I prefer that she tells me (or commands) what she wants. I know that the more she enjoys herself, the more I will enjoy myself.

    GFE is meaningless to me because so many people use it to mean different things. Some GFE girls will even upsell ($50 more to kiss). I will say that it does seem to be pretty generally held that GFE includes DFK, BBBJ, and DATY. Myself personally I think that a girl can offer a GFE and limit herself to CBJ. I prefer BBBJ.

    That is why I would advise reading reviews over just looking at advertisements.

    That said, a date with an escort is paying her for her time and companionship. What happens between consenting adults is up to them. And often YMMV. I know of a lady that was known to practice CBJ. I think that she offered BBBJ to a few clients but didn't want that in her reviews because all guys would expect it. Recently, it is appeared in her reviews that she offers BBBJ but always followed by the caveat YMMV. It was hurting her business. So she wants it known that she does offer BBBJ. She just doesn't do it for every client.

    The Exotic Review in fact limits the rating that a reviewer can give to an escort if she does not offer BBBJ or DFK. If she does offers both of those, the reviewer can give her a maximum score of 9, 8 if she offers only one, and 7 if neither.

    "In order to keep our performance ratings consistent, we set up the following system: An escort provider is only eligible to earn up to a 7, unless she is willing to perform one or some of the following during a session: Kisses With Tongue, Bare-Back Blow Job, Really Bi, and Anal Sex. For each of these services that are offered, her potential max score is raised by one point, with 10 as an absolute maximum.

    "This does not mean she earns extra points for offering the service(s); just that she is now eligible for a higher score. Her maximum eligible score is based on what is offered, not what is performed during your session with her. You may or may not be interested in the “extra” services she offers, but the fact she offers them makes her eligible for the higher score.

    "If your review rates a provider higher than her maximum score, the score will be adjusted down to her maximum."

    Tempest,
    BBBJ = bare back blow job (without condom)
    CBJ = condom blow job

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Actually it wasn't long ago, and I never had a bad review. Plus I went in not knowing what GFE was. Men were asking for GFE and asking for a girl friend experience, and didn't want to risk disease with uncovered acts. I can't speak about what other people experienced. Just like nobody can speak of mine.


    Quote Originally Posted by Eric Stoner View Post
    I'm sorry but this is nothing more than personal nomenclature. Today, if you advertised yourself as "GFE" and then insisted that everything be covered it would have negative ramifications. Your reviews would highlight the misrepresentation and you'd get busted on the boards.

    There is nothing wrong with being a "safety girl". Nothing whatsoever. Plenty of such escorts get plenty of business. But if you don't kiss and don't offer bbbj then it's not a good idea to use "gfe" in your advertising.
    Taking a break from all unproductive shit will prove to be the best choice you can make.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    Some escort advertising malls and review boards will not allow you to advertise yourself as GFE if you do not provide BBBJ. You don't have to like it or agree with it but it is a fact. Escorts advertising as GFE on these venues cannot be fully covered.

    We refer to this as a "Safe GFE"
    There are plenty of lady's that offer a cbj and are well known reputable gfe providers. As mentioned..
    What are these review boards you are referring to?
    I don't chase money. Money chases me.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    The Exotic Review in fact limits the rating that a reviewer can give to an escort if she does not offer BBBJ or DFK. If she does offers both of those, the reviewer can give her a maximum score of 9, 8 if she offers only one, and 7 if neither.
    Why isn't anyone here saying that TER is a useless (if not outright fraudulent) operation that benefits neither clients nor providers? Girls get pressured into doing things they don't want to do for better TER ratings, and guys get suckered into seeing providers that aren't as advertised or reviewed. It's just sad that they continue to gain credibility.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Casual Observer View Post
    Why isn't anyone here saying that TER is a useless (if not outright fraudulent) operation that benefits neither clients nor providers? Girls get pressured into doing things they don't want to do for better TER ratings, and guys get suckered into seeing providers that aren't as advertised or reviewed. It's just sad that they continue to gain credibility.
    I'm sorry C.O. but for once you are off base. TER no longer has any connection whatsoever with Mr. Elms who is currently serving a long stretch in prison for inter alia, murder conspiracy. There WERE serious problems and allegations with the site based on the behavior of Mr. Elms and several moderators focusing on pressuring escorts to see them for free. In exchange, they guaranteed them "good reviews" and suppressed "bad" reviews.

    At present, the site is run by a WOMAN. Almost all the mods were replaced and afaik, its reputation has been restored. Many escorts who left the site, had their reviews pulled etc. have returned as have a number of hobbyists who also detached themselves to avoid being associated with the problems and drama I have described.

    I personally know many providers who value their reviews on TER and have benefitted thereby. So it's hardly just my pov but rather that of ladies whose opinion would seem to matter a lot more than mine.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Whoa when did that happen?

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by la petite sexy View Post
    Whoa when did that happen?
    When did what happen ? This is "OLD NEWS".

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Oh. I've been hearing and reading so many complain about it lately that I thought that had to be a recent event.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    I'm sorry C.O. but for once you are off base.
    No, not really; I never said anything about TER's former management--I'm talking about present clients and their reviewing behavior and how it warps expectations. Like you said, it's not our opinion that matters on this, but the providers--and I've heard some rough tales about the current TER system from long-time pros as recently as a couple months ago.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by Casual Observer View Post
    No, not really; I never said anything about TER's former management--I'm talking about present clients and their reviewing behavior and how it warps expectations. Like you said, it's not our opinion that matters on this, but the providers--and I've heard some rough tales about the current TER system from long-time pros as recently as a couple months ago.
    True. There is something to be said about a board where their reviews (higher ratings) are dependent on the level of "service" an Escort provides. Example - A girl can only receive a 10 if she provides anal etc. The ratings are based on and are higher when a girl offers unprotected services - bbbj and higher risk services - anal.

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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by HustletteDiva View Post
    @MarvelGirl, Thanks for your post. I agree with the stop putting girls down because of what they are charging part as well. We are all here to support each other bottom line. Great Post hun ...=)
    Absolutely!! I think that sometimes we lose sight of the fact that we are meant to be supporting each other, and that its not a competition!!

    No matter what you can make in one night, or one booking, what matters more is you being happy with what you do, and what you earn. I get so frustrated with people assuming that the $800 on a Friday night girls (stripping, not escorting) are earning $800 6 days a week!! Lets stop competing over who earns the most or charges the most, and keep trading stories and advice..

    Thanks so much for this post!!
    I take cash, debit or credit. I just don't take shit.


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    Default Re: My reality of high-end escorting

    Quote Originally Posted by exotic0690 View Post
    We refer to this as a "Safe GFE"
    There are plenty of lady's that offer a cbj and are well known reputable gfe providers. As mentioned..
    What are these review boards you are referring to?
    Several years ago redbook decided that in order to call herself GFE, a provider needed to give BBBJ's, allow DATY and engage in DFK. There was a big blowout on the forums about it and more than a few providers were pissed about it but it happened. You probably didn't hear about it because you're in Canada.

    As another poster already pointed out, a provider cannot recieve a 10 rating on TER if she does not participate in anal sex, BBBJ and other activities. I've seen girls advertising as GFE get branded as ROBs on TER for not providing these activities. That was years ago before I left that board in disgust.

    I've said before that the reality in Canada is probably much different than the reality in the United States. These activities are all illegal in the states which is also why we (American providers) can get away with charging more than Canadian providers. It's really not that hard to understand.

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