Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 55

Thread: Same sex parents

  1. #1
    God/dess anouk.oui's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    2,961
    Thanks
    3,002
    Thanked 1,485 Times in 738 Posts
    My Mood
    Blah

    WWW Same sex parents

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandsty...rs-my-two-mums

    whats your stance on gay parents?

    do you think their kids get more love and acceptance, or more likely to be gender confused and have relationship troubles later on? Do you think they should be allowed to adopt?

    idk, all my friends are talking about this stuff it'd be nice to see some more opinions.
    FUCK YEAH finally retired after 6 years dancing!!
    NEW to camming
    Use the discount code "DANCER" to get 15% off ALL mermaid bikinis & swimwear at



  2. #2
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Honestly, I'd suspect children of same sex parents are probably raised just as well, though I suspect the one good point is they probably aren't pushed into gender roles. Too many kids from an early age are told "you are this gender so you need to do this". I would suppose since gay parents are breaking many traditions (not bad or good traditions, btw) that the gender roles is a good one to break. I know personally I could never have a bad baby unless the dad wasn't into gender roles (and sadly more men are chauvinists than not).

    I don't have a problem with gays raising kids except with one notable exception and this is when a woman uses a man for sperm. Not talking when he willingly gives sperm and they don't have sex. I'm talking when she sleeps with him to get pregnant. I doubt this is a problem with gay couples though, more a problem with single straight women who just have to have a baby.

  3. #3
    God/dess firemaiden04's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2008
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    2,652
    Thanks
    3,054
    Thanked 2,005 Times in 903 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    I have absolutely no problem with same-sex parents.

    I've heard people say it makes the child's life difficult because they get picked on for it at school. And I'm always like, "Um, did you ever GO to school?" You could be the most normal person in the world and kids will find something to pick on you for. Children are monsters. When I was little, I used to come home from school crying every single day because they were so mean. And it was because I was much smaller than they were, as I skipped a grade.

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to firemaiden04 For This Useful Post:


  5. #4
    Veteran Member Amareth's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Melbourne, Aus
    Posts
    640
    Thanks
    178
    Thanked 684 Times in 234 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    I think it's discrimination plain and simple that same sex couples can't legally marry or adopt kids in most countries. Single women are allowed to adopt a child but two people in a loving and lasting relationship can't just because they have matching junk. Wtf?!

    Honestly I think long-term same sex partnerships tend to be more endearing because chances are they've had to go through a lot of challenges just to be together than your average mixed sex couple.

    The only arguments I've heard against it are 1) children need both a male and female role model growing up and 2) they're kid is more likely to grow up to be gay.

    To argument 1 - if this is the case then all single parents should have their kids taken off them, I have no doubt there would be a massive uproar if this were proposed (as there should be).
    To argument 2 - They're not going to encourage their kids to be gay, a lot of gay people I know said they'd be straight if it was a choice simply because of all the stigma and discrimination against them and the shit they've had to go through. If the kid does happen to be gay at least they know they'll have the love and support of their parents which is more than a lot of coming-out kids get from their mixed gender parents.

    Really, if you take this and put any other minority in place of same-sex couples you see just how ridiculous. Imagine if it was two black people, or two deaf people, or two little people that weren't allowed to have kids? That shit would never go down!

    Sorry I could rant on this forever. My sister has been in a loving same sex relationship for 10 years with the same woman. They've both been loving and faithful to each other that entire time and have recently discussed having a kid, they aren't allowed to adopt because neither of them has a penis. Fucking. Ridiculous.

  6. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Amareth For This Useful Post:


  7. #5
    Banned
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    11,037
    Thanks
    1,891
    Thanked 5,124 Times in 3,086 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Kids can be mean to anyone. I used to get called racial names because I had dark hair, skin and eyes in a sea of blond children. Even though I was white and my parents were married (and still are)I was picked on for this. I was picked on for being shy too.

  8. #6
    God/dess Kylea2's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Denver & San Fran
    Posts
    6,907
    Thanks
    181
    Thanked 2,002 Times in 1,285 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    In primary school I had friends with same-sex parents. I don't think it effected them too much except that my one male friend who was raised by his butch-lesbian aunts... he hated women & I think that had a lot to do with them being so mean to him.
    Don't you ever sleep?
    Not at night...that's when the stars have rather better things to do. They're coming out, shining, that sort of thing.
    - Blog -
    My PM box fills up quick. If you have a question please with your username.
    Congrats to Pryce on doing some much needed tending in his garden!
    - -


  9. #7
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Dec 2010
    Location
    the pants party,
    Posts
    798
    Thanks
    936
    Thanked 526 Times in 231 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    my dad is gay.
    he has a boyfriend and has had one since i was 14.
    NEVER bothered me. Dont think its affected me either.

  10. #8
    God/dess Trem's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    2,958
    Thanks
    1,714
    Thanked 3,253 Times in 1,343 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    It's not like anyone is talking about taking kids away from good homes and giving them to gay couples. Even someone who thinks gay parents are not ideal has to admit that they beat having no parents at all.

  11. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Trem For This Useful Post:


  12. #9
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    There are so many fucked up heterosexual parents out there that I can't even believe this is even a question.

  13. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to charlie61 For This Useful Post:


  14. #10
    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cash-Stack-istan Island
    Posts
    14,704
    Thanks
    6,564
    Thanked 11,625 Times in 3,697 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Gay or straight... adopted children should be in a happy, healthy, loving home. Period.

  15. #11
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Hamburg, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    10,607
    Thanks
    2,705
    Thanked 13,685 Times in 4,414 Posts
    Blog Entries
    5
    My Mood
    In Love

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Hell my uncles have been together since I was 8 and when I lived with them I couldn't have asked a more loving home. My grandma has even accepted my uncle Tony. She even jokes with my uncle Ben. one day my uncle had changed the gravel in the aquarium to hot pink and purple.
    My grandma asked my uncle Ben if there was a less "gay" color combo. LOL
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."
    Tempest

  16. #12
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    16,343
    Thanks
    1,395
    Thanked 5,487 Times in 2,768 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by Trem View Post
    It's not like anyone is talking about taking kids away from good homes and giving them to gay couples. Even someone who thinks gay parents are not ideal has to admit that they beat having no parents at all.
    Yeah agreed on this. But I am very glad my mom and dad were a heterosexual woman and man.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

  17. #13
    Banned ArmySGT.'s Avatar
    Joined
    May 2005
    Location
    SW Counter Troll HQ
    Posts
    5,582
    Thanks
    1,589
    Thanked 1,674 Times in 1,043 Posts
    Blog Entries
    13
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post
    Yeah agreed on this. But I am very glad my mom and dad were a heterosexual woman and man.
    Agreed, I 'm glad my parents are a heterosexual couple too. I learned cooking and sewing buttons from my mom. I learned to repair things, enjoy the wilderness, and how to fish from my Dad.

    Each had a different perspective on the world, I think that is a healthier way to go.

  18. #14
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by ArmySGT. View Post
    Agreed, I 'm glad my parents are a heterosexual couple too. I learned cooking and sewing buttons from my mom. I learned to repair things, enjoy the wilderness, and how to fish from my Dad.

    Each had a different perspective on the world, I think that is a healthier way to go.
    I grew up with divorced parents, and my mom instilled in me an extreme love of the wilderness. She happened to also teach me the invaluable () skill of fishing. My goodness...it's amazing I even survived without a Man's influence.

    Balance is important, I'll agree. But it is only in a world that idealizes the patriarchal, nuclear family where this balance can't exist in alternative family models.

    I fully expect the vast majority of the men who speak up in this thread to tout the importance of heterosexual relationships, without any sort of legitimate data to back it up. But mere beliefs have little bearing on real life. If any child grows up fucked up in an otherwise normal homosexual parented household, it's only because of the heterosexist assholes who make him/her feel like shit for being raised inside an alternative family model.

    /rant

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to charlie61 For This Useful Post:


  20. #15
    Banned ArmySGT.'s Avatar
    Joined
    May 2005
    Location
    SW Counter Troll HQ
    Posts
    5,582
    Thanks
    1,589
    Thanked 1,674 Times in 1,043 Posts
    Blog Entries
    13
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Step away from the womens studies courses.

    There is a real world out there, and it does not resemble campus life at all.

    My parents never married and moved apart when I was two. I lived with either in two year intervals. Some nuclear family huh?

    Homosexuals like my Brother are a small percentage of the population. I will let the States decide individually and tell .gov to stay out.

    However, I personally feel a heterosexual couple is what is best for any child.

    The parable to go with fishing is that my Dad taught me to provide for myself.

  21. #16
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by ArmySGT. View Post
    Step away from the womens studies courses.

    There is a real world out there, and it does not resemble campus life at all.
    Is your comment supposed to make me feel silly for having such a pro-alternative movements opinion?

    The real world will only start looking more like 'campus life' (and by that I'm assuming you mean socially liberal?) if people like me speak the fuck up. And people like you, too. I see it as my responsibility, as a white woman who passes as heterosexual, to advocate for others. Is that too 'women's studies courses' of me? Or is that just plain socially responsible?
    Last edited by charlie61; 12-14-2010 at 08:34 PM. Reason: I iz grammar nazi

  22. #17
    Featured Member lopaw's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Los Angeles
    Posts
    1,535
    Thanks
    222
    Thanked 967 Times in 481 Posts
    My Mood
    Pensive

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    I know several same-sex parents, and (so far) their kids are the most well adjusted, open minded & centered little people that I know.

    I once witnessed a 12 yo girl (w/ two dads) get verbally attacked by an overbearing, bigoted moron. This intelligent and well-spoken girl spun that self-righteous redneck's babble back at him in such a thoughtful & truly enlightened manner that the dolt skulked away with his tail between his legs.
    It was AWESOME !

  23. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to lopaw For This Useful Post:


  24. #18
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by lopaw View Post
    I know several same-sex parents, and (so far) their kids are the most well adjusted, open minded & centered little people that I know.
    But...more importantly...can they fish?





    (Okay, sorry ArmySGT...all in good fun. )

  25. #19
    Featured Member Christany's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    oblivion
    Posts
    1,356
    Thanks
    307
    Thanked 337 Times in 241 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    I think the 1950's would serve as a decent model for the underlying dysfunction of a *seemingly* perfect strictly patriarchal heterosexual family institution. Although the 'heterosexual divorce movement' is no bed of roses either.

    I think there's many styles of parenting that could be beneficial if we borrowed bits and pieces from them. Look at elephants. They are a highly emotional animal (as are humans) due to the cortex in their brain. Their parenting style is matriarchal where the females 'parent' in groups. Elephant calves that grow up without experiencing trauma, are very well adjusted animals, the females join the other females in rank, and the bulls become independent from the group. However, those that witness their mother's poaching and other acts of violence become erratic in their adulthood... much like human children do. But the matriarchy can work, what needs to change is society's attitude and acceptance.
    Quote Originally Posted by markx View Post
    I'd have to have a "4 simease twin strippers gave me head and then lite themselves on fire" story to blow anybody's mind here.

  26. The Following User Says Thank You to Christany For This Useful Post:


  27. #20
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by Christany View Post
    But the matriarchy can work, what needs to change is society's attitude and acceptance.
    A much more eloquent and less emotionally charged response than my post! Thank you for saying what I was trying to say, but better!

  28. The Following User Says Thank You to charlie61 For This Useful Post:


  29. #21
    God/dess 4everresolutions's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Great White North
    Posts
    3,605
    Thanks
    2,475
    Thanked 2,620 Times in 1,383 Posts
    My Mood
    Chatty

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    I have a couple girlfriends raised by same sex parents.

    With one girlfriend, her biological mother was the 'man' of the house. We'd go on fishing and hunting trips, man-mom taught us how to change a tire, chop wood, etc.

    Man-moms partner was the feminine one in the relationship - she baked and sewed and cleaned.

    Often times gay couples will have a more 'male' and a more 'female' partner. So it's not like a young boy being raised by a lesbian couple will only know how to apply lipstick and make cakes.

    For the record, my friend turned out just fine, went to college and now had a nice respectable job and fiancée. It's not like she turned into a nasty drug addicted stripper or anything. That would be terrible. /sarcasm

  30. #22
    Featured Member Christany's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    oblivion
    Posts
    1,356
    Thanks
    307
    Thanked 337 Times in 241 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    A much more eloquent and less emotionally charged response than my post! Thank you for saying what I was trying to say, but better!
    It's what makes me grateful for shows like Modern Family. Not only do I love Ed O'Neill, but you get to see that there is no less possibility of love in a family of alt-sexuality. There are so many loving, doting potential parents out there who want nothing more than to be freaking out about how to get their adopted son/daughter into the best school possible. Would the state rather that the child be passed around the foster care system constantly afraid and never know who's house they're going to be living in next?
    Quote Originally Posted by markx View Post
    I'd have to have a "4 simease twin strippers gave me head and then lite themselves on fire" story to blow anybody's mind here.

  31. #23
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    All of these questions remind me so much of other parts of American history. Like, "Could black people really be just like white people? Can they raise children without beating them??"

    I feel like in 20 years or so, similar questions about gay people will be universally regarded as offensive and backwards-thinking. And it's so crazy that conservatives don't see that. Maybe they slept through those history lectures...

  32. The Following User Says Thank You to charlie61 For This Useful Post:


  33. #24
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    16,343
    Thanks
    1,395
    Thanked 5,487 Times in 2,768 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    I grew up with divorced parents, and my mom instilled in me an extreme love of the wilderness. She happened to also teach me the invaluable () skill of fishing. My goodness...it's amazing I even survived without a Man's influence.

    Balance is important, I'll agree. But it is only in a world that idealizes the patriarchal, nuclear family where this balance can't exist in alternative family models.

    I fully expect the vast majority of the men who speak up in this thread to tout the importance of heterosexual relationships, without any sort of legitimate data to back it up. But mere beliefs have little bearing on real life. If any child grows up fucked up in an otherwise normal homosexual parented household, it's only because of the heterosexist assholes who make him/her feel like shit for being raised inside an alternative family model.

    /rant
    I am in almost total agreement here.

    My mom was a very strong-willed woman, a divorced mother of two boys, who did an outstanding job of raising us pretty much by herself. She was the only career women in our lower middle class neighborhood in Detroit, and later Maine (talk about a repressive state, jesus...). Later on, after I went away to college, she moved to Florida and became a very well-known feminist in the state. I just found a few letters from the then governor of Florida, thanking her for her contributions, while cleaning out a box of junk from her house (this happened last night). Kinda cool to see that.

    She was also a very beautiful and graceful woman, one of the top fashion models in Detroit, when the city still had a fashion industry.


    I was also very fortunate to have my dad around frequently in Detroit, and he also kept in close contact with us when we moved, I got to visit a lot, etc.

    He was a very big, tough, strong man who bore an amazing resemblance to a couple of Classical statues of Heracles, I kid you not. He owned the only non-union masonry contracting company in Detroit for many years, which required a great deal of macho power playing in a very masculine world.


    Guess who taught me about camping out, and took me fishing? My mom.

    I could have been a big disappointment to my dad, since I was very, very short and skinny for my age until I was 16. I hated any and all sports with a passion. Instead I wanted to stay inside, read books, and paint pictures.

    But my dad taught me that being a man is not about lifting weights, tossing balls into nets and between sticks, beating people up, etc. He didn't care about that shit.

    In my twenties I finally started working out and got the manly physical exterior going, but it had nothing to do with my dad or my mom.

    What I learned about being a man with a woman, I learned from watching my dad, the way he talked to my mom when he told her he cared about her. The way he was entirely unconcerned with her powerful, charismatic manner of speaking and behaving--which would have put off most macho men for sure, in those days--it did nothing to quell the passion he had for her. (Unfortunately they also fought a lot lol.)

    That's the data I have, and it's as legitimate as you can get. I know when I talk to women I like, I am doing it very much like my father did (in public, I of course never saw the bedroom shit). And they seem to like it a lot. There is no way I would have learned that particular style from a lesbian couple, or a gay father. Though I have no doubt they might have been fully capable of demonstrating equal loyalty and affection as an example.


    The fishing didn't take, though. I am instantly bored. But I do love camping out!
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

  34. The Following User Says Thank You to Djoser For This Useful Post:


  35. #25
    Moderator charlie61's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    13,467
    Thanks
    10,869
    Thanked 20,995 Times in 6,795 Posts

    Default Re: Same sex parents

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser View Post

    But my dad taught me that being a man is not about lifting weights, tossing balls into nets and between sticks, beating people up, etc. He didn't care about that shit.

    What I learned about being a man with a woman, I learned from watching my dad, the way he talked to my mom when he told her he cared about her. The way he was entirely unconcerned with her powerful, charismatic manner of speaking and behaving--which would have put off most macho men for sure, in those days--it did nothing to quell the passion he had for her. (Unfortunately they also fought a lot lol.)

    That's the data I have. I know when I talk to women I like, I am doing it very much like my father did (in public, I of course never saw the bedroom shit). And they seem to like it a lot. There is no way I would have learned that particular style from a lesbian couple, or a gay father.
    Thank you for offering your experience up as 'data'! (seriously)

    I am now going to attempt to bow out of this thread before I stifle further discussion...

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. has anyone ever walked in on your parents having sex?
    By Elektra Luxx in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 01-17-2011, 06:53 PM
  2. YOUR PARENTS and their history with strippers/ stripclubs/ sex industry
    By lilymiaomiao in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 29
    Last Post: 01-11-2011, 03:27 PM
  3. Boy catches parents having sex
    By lethalsoul in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 10-29-2006, 01:21 PM
  4. Teens of Same-Sex Parents Fare Well
    By Tigerlilly in forum Political Poo
    Replies: 25
    Last Post: 12-04-2004, 04:24 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •