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Thread: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

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    Default Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I firmly have to admit that I must and always have had to block out the reality of dancing in order to do it. I am not one of the girls who loves the lifestyle and thinks it is the greatest. I usually mentally block it out whenever I go into work. I know its a job like any other, and I come home. I think all the negativity gets to me sometimes which causes me to be standoffish. Im smart enough to know when people r talking shit about me or r either jealous of me or just plain dont like me( I can just sense it easily--my friends say its bc I can read people well). I also know of course when I bank and I am the center of attention. Like last weekend thankfully.

    My question to u all which may have been asked before but here it goes anyways...How many of u have to mentality block it out in order to get through with it? I know some of u embrace it and have no issues with it really..Just curious...

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    If dancing is making you miserable, in all seriousness, maybe you shouldn't be doing it.

    I've always said that if you can't dance sober, you shouldn't be dancing at all. You don't drink in order to go to work, but you are doing something that has one of the same effects as drinking...you're actively trying to block out your experience. This implies that you find dancing traumatizing on some level, and that's not good. You shouldn't put yourself through an experience that you find so awful.

    Maybe your club sucks, and you should find another one. Oftentimes, the club can make all the difference. My last club started off great, but towards the end of my 2 1/2 years there I was one of maybe three clean girls there. The owner encouraged the extras and was fucking the majority of the dancers. But the club I'm going to start at next month is nothing like that, and has extremely strict rules that ARE enforced.

    Also, the dancing "lifestyle" isn't really true for all dancers. I was one of the top girls at my last club, and I certainly didn't fit into that "lifestyle." What lifestyle? It's a JOB. I went to work, danced, and then went home. I didn't party with other dancers or customers. I never met anyone OTC. I didn't really ever drink, and I wasn't high all the time, and I didn't blow all my money on stupid shit. If you're around this lifestyle all the time and you have to block out what you're doing in order to stand dancing, it sounds to me like it really is your club that's the problem. Maybe you should really try dancing at another one.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I block out the majority of the other dancers because they drive me insane, but I maintain focus when I'm out on the floor. if I detached myself from the situation at hand I wouldn't make much money.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Do you know exactly what it is that makes you feel uncomfortable? If it's the customers, then maybe you just need to start saying no to the guys who get handsy or treat you badly. If it's the other girls, maybe you need to go to a different club. If it's the dancing naked for men in general, then maybe you need a break from dancing, or should try to find another job.

    There are a lot of things I try to block out of my mind, but I guess I'm okay with it at the moment. I'm stuck in this job until I finish school, so I want to make the best of it. For me, the only real downside is the asshole customers, and I just try to remember that I robbed them for a shit ton of money, and came out ahead. My club doesn't have that much drama, and I get along with the other dancers & staff.

    To a certain extent, we all probably try not to think too much about what we're doing in this job -- I mean, there's no question that we don't always *want* to get naked and dance for these weirdos -- but if it's interfering with the rest of your life, you need to do something about it. I suggest you think about what your boundaries are, take a break, or try another club, and see what happens.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    It sounds like the other dancers are making you miserable, yet your money is good. Try some other clubs & private one-on-one or parties.
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    For me I created a stripper persona. When I walked in the door I was her and when I walked out I was me. My stripper persona is a lot more confident and outgoing than I really am. However, I also stayed away from trouble. I was generally not friends with anyone I worked with, and I never drank at work. I always had respect never to allow customers to do things I didn't approve of. I refused to sell myself short by offering things like sex. To me I always told myself it was just a fantasy and never allow it to become a reality. I will admit though that when I started I got addicted to the money and spent a lot. Later on I got more realistic and started going back to college and saving money.

    I saw the industry destroy women and break up marriages. I saw many women who were beat up by their husbands and others being pimped out. Others that lost their kids or got into drugs. I refused to be any of these women.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Quote Originally Posted by Kellydancer View Post
    For me I created a stripper persona. When I walked in the door I was her and when I walked out I was me. My stripper persona is a lot more confident and outgoing than I really am. However, I also stayed away from trouble. I was generally not friends with anyone I worked with, and I never drank at work. I always had respect never to allow customers to do things I didn't approve of. I refused to sell myself short by offering things like sex. To me I always told myself it was just a fantasy and never allow it to become a reality. I will admit though that when I started I got addicted to the money and spent a lot. Later on I got more realistic and started going back to college and saving money.

    I saw the industry destroy women and break up marriages. I saw many women who were beat up by their husbands and others being pimped out. Others that lost their kids or got into drugs. I refused to be any of these women.
    This is what I do. It's kept me happy, and sane.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Thank u all for ur responses.

    There are alot of factors in my life that are contributing to my struggle. As for the club situation there is unfortunately only one club in the area at the moment where I do the best. And yes there is alot of jealousy there. It is highly competitive and I have had to deal with alot of grief there even though it is my top club( I am one of the top girls there). There are other clubs n the area but sadly either their business is horrible, you get treated badly by management, or I am not skinny, or young enough to work there( I weigh between 125 and 130). So I am making the smart decision by primarily sticking to my home club bc overall I do well there but yes it isnt easy around here.

    Also my bf is making lots of comments about how I need to stop dancing, or should. That is making me feel bad about the business. It is making me feel like no one who dances is worthy of being marriage material. This is bullshit. I have been looking around for other jobs and the amount of money I would pull in one week in one of these jobs full time would amount to the money I could pull in one good night. Thats sad bc money around here isnt good. As for private parties--theres no way the bf would allow that. But still I refuse to quit dancing for him--that isnt fair to me.

    I think that truthfully the environment isnt healthy. We overscrutinize our bodies--sometimes feeling worthless if we have gained weight or our faces r broken out etc...People in the clubs dont take us seriously. All we are is a distraction--a body that is judged and expected to like it. We are a persona--we rnt our real selves..No one in there wants to hear our problems..or our shit. And if we have bad nites and make little to no money we feel badly about ourselves. Or if a customer or co-worker thinks we r too fat or untalented and makes comments regarding that- that hurts too.

    And then the fact that people in the real world dont take us seriously when we reveal what we do. Their whole attitude changes. Sometimes u get the instant write off..U can just tell its pointless even having a conversation bc the person ur talking to doesnt see u as a person so whats the use?..This is reality. Sometimes u meet the rare individual who is open minded or accepting but sometimes even this is a ploy to get something u have that they want...

    So what do we become if we r good? Master manipulators... I can get many things through the skills Ive learned through dancing. But is being able to hustle someone a good thing? Im torn..

    Im really torn on alot of this..

    By the dancing lifestyle I mean moreso just the job of dancing--the coming and going, dealing w customers etc. To me being a dancer is choosing a dance lifestyle--but thats just how I see it.

    Another issue is my age--I have been doing this for a while. Some people cant tell my age and figure Im mid to late 20s which is still acceptable others who have known me know otherwise. That coupled w the bf giving me such a hard time is getting to me.

    I also have some other stress factors that r prolly contributing to this situation, but I always try to remind myself it could be and has been alot worse than this. I was wondering if anyone could relate to any of this is all.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Quote Originally Posted by shift_6x View Post
    People in the clubs dont take us seriously. All we are is a distraction--a body that is judged and expected to like it. We are a persona--we rnt our real selves..No one in there wants to hear our problems..or our shit. And if we have bad nites and make little to no money we feel badly about ourselves. Or if a customer or co-worker thinks we r too fat or untalented and makes comments regarding that- that hurts too.
    I have found that you'll find this anywhere and everywhere you work. I have consistently been treated MUCH worse by customers in every other industry I've ever worked in. Car dealerships, customer service, waitressing, sales, you name it. As a matter of fact, this is one of the reasons I want to go back to dancing. I find that a much smaller percentage of customers is rude to me at a strip club than anywhere else. Like, at a strip club, 5% of customers were rude. At the car dealership I worked at, I'd say 75% of the customers were rude. Not to mention my coworkers and management. I think this is probably because as a stripper, you have MUCH more control over your interactions with customers. You have the total authority to pick which customers you dance for, and which you don't. If a guy is rude to you, you can just walk away and not talk to him again. This doesn't really work anywhere else. As a waitress, you can't say, "That customer at my table is being a dick, I'm not going to serve that table anymore."

    A lot of my customers tended to be pretty chill. I didn't have some stripper persona at work...I was just myself, and guys loved it. I was the only girl in the club who wasn't standoffish, or had the whole sex-kitten act. I would just sit with the guys and shoot the shit, then they'd all get dances and I'd bank. They would send their friends in the next night, and the friends would say, "Bob told me you were the coolest girl in here. You aren't fake or rude or stupid. You have real conversations and you don't treat us like shit." I kind of ended up skating by on my reputation as "The Chill One" to a certain extent, because I made so much more money with that than any of the other girls made with their rude, entitled attitude.

    You just sound really burnt out. Maybe you should take a vacation or something and get away for awhile. If dancing is truly making you this miserable, and you aren't willing to leave your club, maybe you should take some time off and relax and find yourself again.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    i totally had to. i know exactly what you are talking about.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I think mostly I have just always been pretty clueless. That said most people tend to think of me as being an intelligent person, especially customers. Perhaps my sense of cluelessness emanates out of a state of not being aware of anything that isn't "in my face". As a dancer, unfortunately I have had a lot of "in my face" situations and I have tried to trace them back to their origins, jealousy seems to be the biggest factor. I am human - and I have experienced jealousy, plus combine jealousy+desperation and that makes for bad times.

    I try to understand and respect everyone and I know some girls who are much more desperate than me and who seem to deal with jealousy better than I do but "seems like" tends to be the operative words here. All that back-stabbing and gossiping coupled with guys who are at the club to hire prostitutes and objectify women. Honestly I think there is a type of customer who just gets off being able to control beautiful women with money because he could never control them like that in real life and it is a power trip for him.

    But anyway...

    I just try to keep it in perspective. I only go to work for the money, anyone who tries to fuk with my money will be dealt with. I show up at the club on time and I am reliable, I don't do drugs or get drunk. I don't create problems. I can rely on the management to help me when one of the fukups is infringing on me (for the most part). I don't gossip or get involved in BS. I just focus on the money. That is how I deal with it. I have seriously banked these last three weeks

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Quote Originally Posted by shift_6x View Post
    Also my bf is making lots of comments about how I need to stop dancing, or should. That is making me feel bad about the business. It is making me feel like no one who dances is worthy of being marriage material. This is bullshit. I have been looking around for other jobs and the amount of money I would pull in one week in one of these jobs full time would amount to the money I could pull in one good night. Thats sad bc money around here isnt good. As for private parties--theres no way the bf would allow that. But still I refuse to quit dancing for him--that isnt fair to me.
    I've said this many times before, but your career will never cheat, lie, abuse, or leave you... people will. Don't put him before what you want for yourself.

    Also, what about webcam?
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I made peace and embraced what I am a long time ago. I fell into the same bullshit a majority of younglings in this business fall prey to. I was hooked on cocaine, blew all my money on stupid shit, married a piece of shit drug dealer, etc. I quit dancing for the 3 months I was with him, hopelessly strung out on cocaine. He tried to pimp me out to his friends and when I wouldn't fuck them he beat the shit out of me.

    I finally left his ass and went back to dancing. If it hadn't been for me walking into work that one day and making $800 for a new apartment I probably wouldn't be here today.

    So no I don't need to block out something that saved my life and my sanity.
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    [quote=Kylea2;2028617]I've said this many times before, but your career will never cheat, lie, abuse, or leave you... people will. Don't put him before what you want for yourself.

    [quote]

    Very true!

    I always tell that to every guy I've met. You can take me or leave me!





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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I can appreciate the diversity of everyone's replys here. Everyone is coming from a different point of view and I can appreciate that. Im not sure if its my job and burnt out--or if its moreso tough relationship issues coupled with the constant frustration that most of the bookings--(Most bars book girls for particular time slots here u cant usually come in whenever u want at the clubs I work at--)have been extremely slow have been depressing me. I was starting to think the problem was just me but as I realized last week it was really that business has been slow and there are only a few decent bookings per week..And u never know which one or ones that will be.

    There has been alot of stress in my school situation as well. Too long of a story. But I will def say its alot harder to go to school when u r older unless u r one of the lucky ones who doesnt have to work and can focus 100% on school. I wish I wouldve completed my associates and possibly at least bachelors n my early to mid 20s but I didnt..Instead I was focused on dancing.

    I would def tell any girl who is say 19 or 21..Get ur degrees NOW and dance part time as u r able to. Live a downplayed lifestyle and save money while you are still young. Get ur bachelors for example by 24/25 and get started out in a career ASAP. I regret not doing that. The only negative thing I would say about doing that given that was my route is the possible student debt. Its not fun being a little over 30 and struggling to get through the last few classes towards an associates.

    I have lots of regrets if I really want to be honest with myself. I dont wish to go back to 19 or 21 and be that age again right now. I just wish I could have made different decisions and been motivated to accomplish more than just paying the bills. I knew back then I didnt know what I wanted to do or be. Even now I am not sure. Kinda a tough spot in alot of ways. Feels like Ive lost my identity and soon I will be forced to find another one. And Im not that excited about leaving my comfort zone and venturing out into a possibly poorer future unless I can find a somewhat comparable income job to dancing.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Quote Originally Posted by shift_6x View Post
    I would def tell any girl who is say 19 or 21..Get ur degrees NOW and dance part time as u r able to. Live a downplayed lifestyle and save money while you are still young. Get ur bachelors for example by 24/25 and get started out in a career ASAP. I regret not doing that. The only negative thing I would say about doing that given that was my route is the possible student debt. Its not fun being a little over 30 and struggling to get through the last few classes towards an associates.
    I'm a firm believer in focusing on dancing until about the age of 24, or earlier if the person has some way to claim independency status on the FAFSA forms. It means more government assistance, so there is far less debt occurred. Plus, it gives them time to experience the reality of life & figure out what they really want rather than changing majors multiple times & wasting more money on credits that won't be useful towards their degree. If they work hard before that & save up, at 24 they should be able to go to school & work less than part time - allowing more focus on studies. A person who does that could easily graduate at 28 & most people wouldn't ask questions because in the work field they are still considered "young".
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I think it just depends on the individual. I went to college straight out of high school and had a degree and a "real job" at age 22. I wish I would have danced while I was younger and made more money instead of trying to start in my late 20's. I had no idea who I was or what I wanted to do when I was 18 yet I had to pick a major. Now I have a degree that I will never use $22,000 worth of student loans and I'm a friggin waitress!!

    I've worked in corporate America, social services and I've waitressed and I've experienced burn-out in all 3. At least with dancing you have some freedom and flexibility and you make a lot of money. I walked out of work today with $50 in tips after 6 hours and I have to be nice and cater to my customers for lousy tips. Just giving you a different perspective. Don't be so down on yourself. Keep pushing you'll be fine. Every job has its ups and downs.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I find it interesting that the OP used the phrase " block out the reality" when this job is as far from reality as you can get. That could be part of the problem. The SC is a whole different world in itself with different codes of conduct.... I hate it when people say, if you can't do this job without a drink, or without blocking some aspects of it out, or without letting certain things get to you than you shouldn't do it. It's a job. Aside from alcohol which is a negative if abused, people are allowed to use coping mechanisms to deal with the negative aspects of thier job. Just ask a cop, or a judge, or a therapist or hell even a burger flipper. People do what they have to do. My advice would be to devote more time to things that make your spirit happy so that you have a balance.... If your world revolves around work it is never a good thing.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Quote Originally Posted by Pure View Post
    I hate it when people say, if you can't do this job without a drink, or without blocking some aspects of it out, or without letting certain things get to you than you shouldn't do it. It's a job. Aside from alcohol which is a negative if abused, people are allowed to use coping mechanisms to deal with the negative aspects of thier job. Just ask a cop, or a judge, or a therapist or hell even a burger flipper. People do what they have to do. My advice would be to devote more time to things that make your spirit happy so that you have a balance.... If your world revolves around work it is never a good thing.
    There's a big difference between enjoying what you do most of the time & needing to "block reality". If you are coming to work & it makes you miserable each day, then it's not good for you emotionally or physically. It can:

    - Affects your sleep: insomnia, bad dreams, lack of ability to reach R.E.M. state
    - How you deal with other people inside & outside of work
    - Drains you of any enthusiasm in your life
    - Trashes your self-esteem
    - Makes you feel like your work isn't making a positive difference to anyone
    - You feel like you are just a number, without a personal interest from others
    - Changes your personal habits in a negative way: not eating, exercising, seeing friends etc.

    When people start encountering these then they use blocking mechanisms to cope, but eventually they will break you down, which is why CHANGING your situation is better than just coping. Drinking & other coping mechanisms are not good because it causes people to prolong their own misery, which effects others as well. Job misery is like a rash, you can't put a bandaid over it & expect that it will go away, you have to fix the source of the problem. Yes, there are thousands of people "coping" around the world, but they can't do it forever & thinking you can ignore it is misleading. Problems tend to escalate when you ignore them, not go away.

    The majority of the OP's stress seems to be coming from co-workers, & rather than running around in circles at this club trying to ignore them while problems escalate, she can either:

    1.) Move onto a new situation
    2.) Change her current situation

    However, sometimes a fresh start can be a nice change. If she wants to drastically change her current situation then she will either need to earn enough respect from her co-workers so that they aren't talking about her, or befriend them... which obviously could be very tough to do but maybe less tough than trying to earn enough respect from them that they stop with their negativity. Plus, not all people can be befriended - particularly if the situation has become extremely hostile. If it can though, that would probably be the best resolution, just a very difficult one to achieve. I'm sure at some point though most of us have befriended a previous enemy... & sometimes the leap of faith to do so is all that is needed.
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    ^^^^ Agreed 100%.Only the individual can know for themselves when they have crossed the line from being slightly dissatisfied with a job and burnt out into job misery.

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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I can understand alot of what you're saying. Esp the part about people in the real world tuning you right out if you tell them the truth about what you're doing.
    I too am older and I give you alot of credit for going back to school. I couldn't do it unless I didn't have to work.
    It sounds like the big challenge is that your man isn't validating what you're doing. I guess he has no idea what it's like to know a "regular" job will pay you all week what a good night working the club will make. I did that recently for 6 months after I got married and fell soooo far behind.
    If you're at a club and doing good most nights then keep it. Jealousy is at all clubs. Good $ is few and far between right now. And like you said- you never know which night it will fall on.
    If you're not tuning out the club with alcohol and drugs than you are doing great! ( It doesn't sound as if you are) That is where I draw the line. If that's what you have to do( and alot of ladies do this) , then I think it's not doing anything positive for you. The drugs won't magically disappear after you leave the club for a new job. ( and no I don't need to be flamed for writing this. I know some of you like your drugs. Doesn't make you any better or worse than me)
    Last edited by Mare; 12-21-2010 at 04:12 PM. Reason: typo

  27. #22
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    I meant block out the reality as in block out what u r really doing which is dancing in order to get by. Thank u all for ur excellent advice. I can tell some of u r confused as to where Im coming from. Like I mentioned earlier its a clusterfuck of things. One thin that isnt helping me out is my bf giving me such a hard time baout dancing. Some of the things he has said to me hurt me badly bc he is the one person n the world who is supposed to not judge me and love me for the person I am inside. I dont think he gets what hes actually doing. As for the girls at work yea there is alot of competition and more and more girls r talking more and more shit. my regular hears it too. Some girls actually go to the customers and talk about how my boobs r too big. Or how my current hair color and eye color r overrated. People in general r just getting to me. Im overly sensitive and Im starting to think I should go to their level and talk shit about them just to get even. And maybe w the bf I should talk shit about his job and how only losers do what he does..Maybe I should make people pay. Maybe thats the only solution.

  28. #23
    God/dess shanna dior's Avatar
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Sounds like you're having a difficult time with your life in general, not just dancing. It's hard to juggle the realities of being a student, a part-time worker (especially a stripper), and a girlfriend, and it seems like you don't have much of a support system to help you get through tough times like this.

    You can't really control bookings or school, but maybe getting more organized with your schoolwork will help you feel a bit more in control of your life. You say you only have a few classes left, so I take it you're almost done. Try and focus on how proud you'll be of yourself once you graduate and have the diploma in your hand - think about all the doors having that is going to open up for you!

    The other things you can control are your mood and your relationship. Instead of talking shit about your boyfriend's job, communicate to him how much you're struggling right now and why stripping is such a good option for you. Tell him how frustrating it is for him to be putting down your job so much, and ask him to be a bit more understanding and supportive. If he can't be, then maybe it's time to reconsider your relationship. A partner should definitely accept you and be there for you (especially in tough times), and if he isn't fulfilling that role, maybe you two just aren't a good match - and there's nothing wrong with that!

    And as difficult as it is, try and view stripping differently: it's a means to an end (a degree, and, hopefully, a successful career). You almost have your degree, so you won't have to be stripping for too much longer. Start networking and looking for opportunities in your field to make that transition faster after graduation. Go in to the club, stay out of the dressing room as much as possible, and just make your money. Block out the other girls and relish in the fact that YOU'RE the one making money while they're bitching about your boobs (too big?? lol as if there's such a thing!). Hustle, dance, and get out.

    I would also recommend, if you have time, joining some sort of group for a hobby or activity you're interested in so you can meet like-minded people, become friends, and build your support system. Reach out to people you're close to, and try and get closer to ones that you haven't yet but would like to get to know better. it's so important to surround yourself with people that care about you so they can keep you strong in times like this.

    Best of luck girl, I really hope things turn around for you!

  29. #24
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    i get how you're feeling hun *hugs* for me i had this funny thing where i would have to block out the reality of dancing in order to be able to do it. but then on the other hand i would be dancing to block out the reality of my real life! if that makes sense? i decided i had to stop dancing. i've got a job in the club in a different role. just till i find something else. dancing is something i've done for awhile now so it's a strange comfort to still be in the club and not be putting myself through what in my head i had to do to do the job.

    sounds like you've got a lot going on, and it doesn't sound like your partner is being at all supportive. i know from experience also how tough that is. do what you 'need' to do honey but don't hurt yourself in the process - it's not worth it xx

  30. #25
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    Default Re: Blocking out the Reality of Dancing in Order to Stand It

    Thank u guys for the compassion ur showing. I really appreciate it. I made the mistake of saving my most difficult classes til last and Im not making it through them. I prolly am getting my financial aid yanked so idk if I will be b able to finish my degree anytime soon. Money isnt consistent around here. Im talking some of my clubs have been closing early bc business is so slow. I definitely know that I am having a hard time period. U guys r right my support system isnt that great. I have one or two close friends but even they cant really be there consistently. I recently had to reach out to my family and thats not something I feel comfortable doing..But I did it anyway. Ive lost alot of motivation. I cant keep it going right now.

    And as for the bf Ive expressed to him how miserable I am right now and how i dont need anyone else making me feel badly. He is trying to be nicer but our relationship isnt that great. we r very different people n alot of ways. I have several mental-emotional issues and I know they r hard for people to handle. Thats y I dont like to reach out very much. Its like if I express to people how depressed I am or worried they just see me and treat me as weak. My bf is the type of guy where if there is a problem he might address it but he keeps going. Things dont get to him like they do to me and hes insensitive quite often. Today I have to go into work and really i dont want to go. I know everyone has these times..Not just me.

    I try to fake it at work like Im fine. it just seems that the less people know how upset u really may be the more they leave u alone. I need support but in some ways I just want to be left alone. Idk if that makes sense.

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