Deleted now and moved on
Thank you all very much for the support and advice.
Deleted now and moved on
Thank you all very much for the support and advice.
Last edited by Kisca; 04-29-2011 at 02:44 PM.





Depends on how dire your situation is. I think you really should get out - it's not good to be in this controlling atmosphere where you can't relax.
Juggling school and work wouldn't be that difficult. If your rent is under 1000/month inclusive (which would get you a very comfortable place to live in a safe neighbourhood), and you keep your other expenses low (~$500/month) then assuming you make $200/shift + shift pay, you'd be making 500/week just by working 2 nights. Go to school all week, work Friday and Saturday nights.
Also, not all leases begin at the beginning of the month, essp. not for those basement apartment types. They don't mind if you sign the lease on the 1st or the 14th.





Kisca, do you go to a college with dorms? If so that might be your best bet. They won't judge you on your history, plus they might be able to help you financially (many schools offer loans for this or even grants). You need to get away from him asap.
Kisca, sounds like you have a lot going on right now. Do you have to move out or just want to because of the situation? I mean if you can just hang out there and go to school that would be great. Working and school is very hard, but I did it while I was attending nursing school.
If you do move out, I don't think rental history should be too big a deal, especially if you're renting from a person and not a big complex. Just tell them your situation and give them a personal reference to call. Most people don't like to do month to month rent out here in Arizona...I don't know where you are from. You may be able to get a 6 month lease.
Moving out on Feb 1 doesn't seem to give you much time. I don't know how much stuff you have to move...I guess you just need to go out and see what you can find. Check craigslist, local newspapers, etc. Hopefully you find something and someone willing to rent to you.
Good luck![]()
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issue resolved
Last edited by cherryblossomsinspring; 01-27-2012 at 11:04 AM.
Why would you let someone control your life like that? It's not like you can't get money if you really wanted it. You are basically selling your freedom for pennies, you really think you can handle living that way all through school?
It depends on how difficult your program is imo. If it's super tough, then just stay right where you are till you graduate, if it's fairly easy, then do the work thing and get out.
I'm in a similar situation atm. The only difference is I have 2 kids. Made straight A's one semester living with my parents and having them watch the kiddos, next semester they stopped watching them once I got home (so I could study or cook, not goofing off), well I had to withdrawl, so now I'm stuck with the ex-husband living with me in a small apt and dictating everything (he is an insane control freak and borderline abusive). I'm dealing with it atm though because there is no one else to watch the kiddos for me and I'll never be free without my degree. I can do anything for another 18mos to get my degree and my freedom!!
"I hear you calling and it's needles and pins. I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name...You're poision. but I don't wanna break these chains.... I wanna love you but I'd better not touch."





Any way you can stay with your parents for 6 months so you can get a little breathing room?
Get a heater, get an air mattress, and give Mom & Dad money for room and board...go to school and go to work. It's not a retreat, and not a failure, just a strategic move at the moment for your future.
Be strong, your a smart girl you will work through this.




I understand what its like to leave someone ur comfortable with.. I really do know where u r coming from. Everyone gave good advice. U could even rent a room in a house if u had to. Where u live must be super nice bc around here u can rent a room for 500 avg.





IME yes. I've had several over time, including a few where we lived together for years. Even when you are the one doing the breaking up (and I usually was), IME there is always a deep sense of loss - a hole that was occupied by someone but is now empty.
It gets better with time. But until it does, IMHO you shouldn't feel silly for mourning the loss of a partner, even if the loss was ultimately for the best.
^^I agree it's completely normal for breakups to be hard!! I initiated the end of my marriage, but that didn't make it any less painful. It suuuucked....hard.
"I hear you calling and it's needles and pins. I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name...You're poision. but I don't wanna break these chains.... I wanna love you but I'd better not touch."




U r doing the right thing by staying w ur parents. I know it will be hard but u got to find something to fill the void of him. Whether its going out to meet new guys, hanging out w a friend as much as possible..Until u find someone better u got to find someone to lean on friend wise. And remember ur vulnerable and guys may try to take advantage of ur loneliness..Ive def been there...Just know we r all in ur corner and Ive been there. Also watching movies is a really good thing to do to try and distract urself if it gets too bad. I know it may not work for everyone but it helped me. Just remember ur number one right now.




I'm a little late, but just wanted to say how glad I am you moved out and you're starting on your own. Breakups always suck, even when it's breaking a relationship with a friend, cutting off an ex...anything, but that pain will go away and you'll be much better knowing nobody is stopping you to do whatever you want.
Hope you get everything on tracks soon.![]()
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