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Last edited by ShellyConnors; 01-27-2011 at 04:11 PM.





Honestly, it would depend, but I had to dump my best friend of over 25 years. We were friends since high school (met first day of high school) were inseperable most times, but then we would not talk for months. Just a few things she did.
1) I introduced her to another friend and these two became friends and left me in the dust. They then started stalking me at home (this was when I was 16) and they would go out do drugs and have sex with random friends. Looking back I should have ditched her then but no and it caused a lot of trouble later on.
2) She would get mad at her boyfriend (who was her mom's former alcoholic boyfriend) and they would beat each other up. Then afterwards he blamed me. Many times I would go there, they'd go into a fight, then he'd blame me. I once went over there, he hit me, I hit him back and I got arrested. My friend actually turned against me in court (I got court supervision and charges were later dropped). Another time her boyfriend had one of his friends beat me up, then my friend begged me not to press charges. I did, and she refused to speak to me for years.
3) She ended up dumping him (in an irony he later apologized for what he did) and married someone else. Because I didn't approve of the marriage (her husband doesn't have a high school diploma or a job)she didn't invite me to her wedding.
4) In general she was an embarassment. She would get drunk and swear or accuse my brother's coach of having sex with her. The last straw (after putting up with her abuse) was when she swore at her son's graduation, threatened to beat me up, and I walked out. This was 3 year this May and I wish I had done it sooner. My whole family hated it and so did most of my other friends.
I bring this up to make a point that toxic friends really add nothing and if it's something very evil, I would dump her. Don't make the mistake of taking her back like I did. My friend started out doing a bunch of other things not mentioned (drunk driving, drugs, etc) I ignored it and it got worse.
Shelley...it sounds like she has remorse for what happened...so that should count for something. It doesn't sound like she is continuing to do it. It is so hard not knowing what it was that she did. Unconditional love is an interesting topic though...I mean its great to actually love and care for someone no matter what they do....however, I also think you can still love and care about them, but just not be around them any more...or keep your distance. I don't know...tough one...go with your feelings.
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Really hard to answer that question without actually knowing the situation, if you don't want to tell us then the only one who can make that decision is you.
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Last edited by ShellyConnors; 01-27-2011 at 04:12 PM.

UGHH. what a horrid situation. your friend seriously needs help. before cutting her off perhaps try getting her some therapy? maybe she was molested as a child? If she really is your best friend and youre the only one in the world she confided in, then youre the only one who can help her.
I'd cut her off, same as I would a male friend that did the same. I'd also probably report her to law enforcement. There shouldn't be two different standards for men vs women in my opinion.
"I hear you calling and it's needles and pins. I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name...You're poision. but I don't wanna break these chains.... I wanna love you but I'd better not touch."
Yeah, that's a dealbreaker. If it was a male who did that we'd be talking about involving the cops.
i'd never give up on my sister if she killed someone...even if it was in cold blood.
my brother HAS killed people (he is a soldier) and i forgive him. i hope he forgives himself.
sorry that's not really helpful, there's a big difference between murder/sleeping with a young girl that came onto you really strong. she probably really needs you right now, if only to be like "DUDE THAT IS NOT OKAY. i am grossed out by you right now!" you probably are the only person in the world she can talk to. but she doesn't sound like she's very good for your life. you have lost respect for her, and wouldn't confide in her similarly. that is a friendship-killer. whoever posted about toxic friends is right...it's brutal but true.
"I'm teaching fools some basic rules. / I believe in the Golden Rule. The man with the gold rules. / I made a little money.
And like the Bible says, I was enjoying the fruits of my labor. This is my comeback. This is me doing what I love to do." -- Mr. T
"In the street I am my divine self. In the club I am a stripper, portraying a fantasy.
That's not to say anybody can do or say anything to me but it's acting. Playing a role. That simple." -- Pure![]()
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thanks for all the responses...
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