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Thread: I am too nice....HELP

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    Default I am too nice....HELP

    Hello ladies, well I have been dancing for about 3 1/2 months now and I do okay but its time to pick it up. I work at a great club in Manhattan which has a high business clientele. I work 2 day shifts (usually stay later though) and 2 night shifts. I can usually sit with a guy, have good conversation and get either one or a couple dances but I have trouble getting them upstairs. I am also the girl that gets asked out all the time, I have a serious boyfriend at home and don't usually tell people I am unavailable but have read a lot of good posts about telling people that I am taken. Okay anyways I need advice about getting men upstairs into our private rooms. When is the best time to ask and how do I take the approach? Also I am not used to working nights where there is a lot of girls and a lot of men, it becomes very overwhelming sometimes. During the afternoon its more about spending time chatting and then getting dances but at night I think its a different story. Any advice on that? Thank you ladies in advance, I always appreciate all the advice you give

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    Senior Member AnotherBruisedPeach's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    I read on a thread that new girls tend to waste more time talking to customers that don't pay. Maybe you should come up with different ways to politely end a conversation and move on to another client. The more people that you expose yourself to the more likely you're to get someone up to a private room. Right?

    Also (and I could be totally wrong) maybe you should try being a little more mysterious. You're selling a fantasy. If men see you as a girlfriend type they might be more apt to talk to you but not buy dances from you. I'm just throwing that one out there. I honestly don't have the experience to back it up.

    Hopefully someone who does can help you out more. It's just a random suggestion.

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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    I agree with you and I have been trying that but I have read so many posts on here about girls who tell guys they do have a significant other and make more money because of it. Thank you for the advice

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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    Many experienced dancers have posted on this topic, and so many have recommended the following:

    1. Chat with a customer for no more than 2 or 3 songs, then suggest a dance. (Don't forget that the customer is here on his own time, but you are at work! And yours is a sales job!)

    2. If the customer isn't interested in buying dances (that is, if he just wants your time for free), there are a zillion different lines you can use to escape without being rude. For example, "It's been so much fun talking with you, but I really have to get back to work now."

    IMHO, this line is very polite and really flattering! It implies to the customer that you did not consider your conversation with him to be part of your job, but a break from it! It also lets the customer know that while he is here to have fun, this is your job.

    I'm sure that there are so many other terrific ideas and suggested phrases for your situation in the "Hustle Hut" section of this board.

    Good luck!

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    Featured Member sierra.'s Avatar
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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    You´ve gotten some good advice so far, and as far as sitting too long with customers I think that´s something that will sort of develop with experience...
    I just want to throw in that I recently started telling guys I have a boyfriend instead of pretending to be single... I get asked out A LOT less which is good, but sometimes guys will try and ask me all kinds of questions about my boyfriend which can be kind of awkward... I think trying to play the "too fun to be tied down" angle, like Athena said, is a good idea... just sharing my experience.

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    Featured Member Odette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    Yes. You have to get used to asking customers for a dance. If you're shy, play up the sweet girl-next-door type of persona. But you have to ask, during the day, after 4-5 songs (15 minutes) AT MOST. When its busier, you should not be sitting for more than 3 songs, its wasting your time, and other girls'! I mean, what if some guy with a lot of cash comes in while you're sitting there talking to this PL who's not going to spend on you, and he goes off with some other girl instead? I met most of my regulars because they saw me standing at the bar by myself when they walked in, and came over and immediately asked for a dance. I know its supposed to be bad to sit at the bar by yourself, but if you don't have any new customers to talk to, why not? You're right in the line of sight of new customers

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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    Hey girl, the way I do it is I talk for nomore than one song (especially at night, I don't work days), and then I ask for a dance. During the dance if they seem to be into it you can whisper in their ear something like "we should take this somewhere a bit more private, let's go upstairs and get naughty/party/have fun/be more intimate". Plant it into their head that upstairs is better cause it is. Also, I know here in NY alot of girls allow touching on the floor, DONT! The contact stuff is for the upstairs rooms only. Try to get him upstairs during that dance, don't even finish it, just grab his hand and your dress and GO! That's how I do it.
    Another way I do it is I always wait till the next song starts to begin a dance unless it's super busy and pretty much everyone is being quick about asking for dances/delivering dances. So, while I'm waiting for the next song to start ask him if he's been there before. If he has ask him if he's heard of our upstairs naughty room/vip room/ private rooms/etc. If he hasn't explain to him that it's a more intimate setting, more private, better place to do dances and have fun, etc. Try to get him upstairs then. If he declines, just be like "ok i'll just dance for you then". Do your dance and during it do what I said above. This is how I ALWAYS sell them. Do this with every customer and you should be able to sell a room cause it's all a numbers game.
    If you don't sell a room, at least you got a dance or two without wasting more than 1-2 songs. 3 at most.

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    Default Re: I am too nice....HELP

    It may help to change your perspective.

    Think of them as customers at a restaurant. They are there to purchase things off of the menu: conversation, and DANCES. So if you aren't being upfront about the services you offer, then you aren't giving them an opportunity to order, and you're essentially shorting your customers! You have to tell them what's on the menu, and tell / show them why they should want to order the most expensive item on that menu!

    From this perspective, you aren't actually being nice by sitting with them for so long.

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